He is, in fact, a bitch.
Roommate refuses to use my body wash cause it's not "manly"
Submitted 2 days ago by moonbathe@lemmy.world to mildlyinfuriating@lemmy.world
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/72c11ff0-9d99-4b96-af4c-a3e419d80c03.jpeg
Comments
Diddlydee@feddit.uk 2 days ago
saltesc@lemmy.world 2 days ago
A filthy bitch
SARGE@startrek.website 1 day ago
“If you’re too insecure to wash your nasty-ass stank smell off because of a nice smell, you ARE a bitch, and a whiny one at that. When you grow up to be a REAL man, my body wash will still be there, not giving a shit about what dangles between your legs or what you think is or isn’t manly.”
frankpsy@lemm.ee 14 hours ago
Bro Soap. Manly soap for manly men, no chemicals that will make you gay or turn you into a woman. Comes in wood pine and musky tusk. Real men don’t bathe, but when you must, use Bro Soap. No homo.
davidagain@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Fragile masculinity
LeninOnAPrayer@lemm.ee 1 day ago
My friend from Korea once said “I think most American men’s entire personality is built around trying to prove to everyone they’re not gay”. Pretty much sums it up.
NatakuNox@lemmy.world 10 hours ago
Ya then look at the military. My dad spent 8 years in the airforce and he swears it was the most homoerotic 8 years of his life even tho he’s straight. Gay shit is so common in the military it’s laughable whenever conservatives try to hold military men as the gold standard for what a man is. Meanwhile a whole platoon of Marines are seeing is Jim Bob can deep throat the plotoons gaint black dildo. But totally as a joke… Why does the platoon have a dildo… Don’t ask don’t tell.
foggy@lemmy.world 1 day ago
WHAT BRO WHO U CALLING FRAGILE 😡
/s
Penny7@lemm.ee 4 hours ago
It sounds like this guy needs SLAM LOTION! The best sunscreen for manly men that want to suntan like a man!!!
And if you didn’t know…it’s a real thing. I just learned about it today.
LordGimp@lemm.ee 20 hours ago
A good 20% of the appeal in actually dating women is getting to use their forbidden female bath products every once in a while when your 11 in 1 manboy all purpose body scrub, shampoo, conditioner, lubricant, fuel oil, anti seize, weed killer, bug repellent, fire starter, persevative, and paint stripper runs out.
Ultraviolet@lemmy.world 19 hours ago
As a guy with long hair, I’ve learned to just roll my eyes at the gendering of hair products. The all in one shit is made with the assumption that it’s being used on short hair that’ll be chopped off in a few months max, so it doesn’t need to preserve anything. Long hair has to last years.
Dojan@pawb.social 19 hours ago
Same. To be fair it’s an easy choice for me, why would I want to smell like some nebulous XXXFUEL, SPORTS PISS, or MOUNTAIN JUNK when I could smell like a bakery instead? Apple and cinnamon poo and condish? Yes please. Vanilla leave-in? Give!
Fusselwurm@feddit.org 14 hours ago
Ha, yes. I just learned this a couple weeks ago and about thirty years too late. My past self couldve looked a lot better.
nthavoc@lemmy.today 9 hours ago
Forgot gunpowder and charcoal. Exfoliates the skin.
uniquethrowagay@feddit.org 18 hours ago
Im a man but almost exclusively buy “women’s” soap and shampoo. It smells better to me and it’s absolute horse shit that this stuff is gendered in the first place.
WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 18 hours ago
I was forced to use my mother’s vanilla smelling Shampoo. I smelled like a woman at work.
Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 18 hours ago
You guys don’t get it. Those products smell like that to appeal to women. If anyone even notices you smell like a woman, the obvious inference is that you have a girlfriend. Or at least spent the night with a woman. If it’s dilute enough to not really be noticeable, women will just find it appealing. Vanilla in particular is non-gendered, what you smelled like was a cookie!
Geetnerd@lemmy.world 9 hours ago
Did it make you want to slob a knob?
lambda@programming.dev 18 hours ago
Mike Birbiglia has a really funny bit about this. Calling the shampoo, body wash, tooth paste, “sham-paste”. Of course watch his comedy special as my comment won’t do it justice. I think of it everytime I’m in the bath aisle at a store.
01189998819991197253@infosec.pub 1 day ago
I ain’t no bitch
Proceeds to bitch.
Reverendender@sh.itjust.works 2 days ago
Do other people normally ask acquaintances to buy them body wash? This is a situation that has literally never occurred to me.
moonbathe@lemmy.world 2 days ago
If one of us is going out, we ask the other to grab whatever we need, since we share the place.
CosmicTurtle0@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 days ago
Which is nice when the item in question is like “onions” or “apples”. Things that don’t have a ton of variety or choice.
There are so many soaps and he seems like a little bitch, the kind that will want to smell each one to make sure it’s manly.
5too@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Used to do IT for a small meat packing plant; would shoot the shit with the warehouse guys whenever they came in for a break. Bunch of 20-something guys slinging 20-60 pound boxes of meat all day.
Power went out one time, and we’re all sitting around waiting to see if the power is going to come back quickly enough that we don’t need to start unloading all the inventory; and one of them expressed a need to use the facilities. I told him the bathroom was right there; it didn’t need power to flush.
There were no windows, and he didn’t want to end up peeing all over the floor.
I pointed out that if he sat down, he wouldn’t need to aim.
“I’m not gonna sit to pee!”
“Dude, it’s not like it’s gonna fall off.”
“It might!”
YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today 1 day ago
Stories like these and the multiple ones about dudes not wiping after they shit gives me serious pause when considering my other cis het mental faculties. Shiiiit, I usually only go once a day in the morning but it my crack is itching I’ll wet down some toilet paper just to make sure I got everything. Do these weirdos actually enjoy having an itchy ass‽
13igTyme@lemmy.world 1 day ago
More fun facts.
Many men don’t wash their ass in the shower because it’s considered gay.
Also 1/3rd of Americans and Europeans only change their bed sheets once a year.
FunnyUsername@lemmy.world 1 day ago
i love sitting down to pee. with a penis, even. standing up takes effort. sitting does not. i can dribble off in the toilet instead of on my pants. i can check my phone quick. i can sit instead of stand. pee flows out better sitting down so i strain less. i don’t have to stand elbow to elbow with a stranger holding his dick, too literally ever. the pros are quite good.
the only bad thing is apparently some men think it’s not manly! but im gay sooo oh nooooo anything but that. also sometimes the water is too high and the tip of your dick might touch but really this barely ever happens. I’m all anyways, so when i use a urinal my dick is squished up by the top rim most of the time anyways which i find gross too.
SouthEndSunset@lemm.ee 23 hours ago
I don’t think it matters, I’m straight. I love sitting down.
Kissaki@feddit.org 1 day ago
standing up takes effort. sitting does not.
Butt how do you get up? /o\
Dojan@pawb.social 19 hours ago
How would he handle things if he needs to pee and poo? Like, does he do one, switch positions, and then the other? It just sounds super inconvenient and involved.
humorlessrepost@lemmy.world 12 hours ago
Thats the worst. Stand to pee, let out a fart while peeing, fart turns into turtlehead, finish peeing, and to immediately sit down with face in fart cloud.
Chiarottide@lemmy.world 1 day ago
As a cis man, I sometimes pee sitting down but only at home, never in a public bathroom. I go as far as lifting the toilet seat with my foot. The less contact the better. Maybe if I touched the bowl with my dick it would fall off, not taking any chances
rumba@lemmy.zip 22 hours ago
Yeah, It wouldn’t be so bad if the toilets weren’t completely covered in pee.
rottingleaf@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I think that other guy was joking and the problem was, I dunno, fearing to stumble when standing up.
5too@lemmy.world 21 hours ago
I think it was mostly the fact that if he did go at that point, the other warehouse guys would decide he had indeed sat down to pee.
CanadaPlus@lemmy.sdf.org 7 hours ago
This seems like a golden opportunity to fuck with him in subtle ways. How many girls things can you disguise?
Bojack411@lemmy.world 13 hours ago
Call him a faget and move on. Gotta be a real bitch to act like nice smelling soap will make you want to put a cock in your ass
Geetnerd@lemmy.world 9 hours ago
Know what’s really “bitchy?” Being afraid other dudes will think you’re a bitch. Nothing more bitch-like.
Know what’s really “manly?” Fucking other dudes! Getting all that free protein T paste, right from the tap… no soaking up E from a blown out roastie through your dick.
ThePyroPython@lemmy.world 21 hours ago
“I ain’t no bitch” that’s some strong whining that makes you look like a bitch.
Where’s your stoic attitude of “suck it up and deal with it” Mr Manly Man?
Christ, I’ve eaten peaches that didn’t bruise as easily as his ego.
epicstove@lemmy.ca 18 hours ago
I’ve never understood thr gendering of stuff like this.
Like bro, soap is soap. I rather smell like roses and lavender than a mix of industrial shit and BO.
LemmyFeed@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 day ago
A man can certainly buy his own body wash on his own time. He’s acting like a little bitch fo sho.
Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 20 hours ago
Yeah, “I’m busy” isn’t your roommate’s problem.
A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world 1 day ago
a real man would fuckin love some bulgarian rose scented shit.
only some insecure little twat would balk at smelling decent.
abbadon420@lemm.ee 1 day ago
Yeah, I’m not going out buying some “manly” beard conditioner, when my wife has a perfectly fine, pink bottle of rose scented “girl” conditioner that I can use for my beard just fine. Saves me a trip.
A_Random_Idiot@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Lol, same.
I showered at a relatives and liked their fruity (as in, actual fruit smell, not as in the pejorative) body wash so much that I’ve been buying it for myself for 6+ years now.
SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Your boyfriend can buy his own damn butthole soap
moonbathe@lemmy.world 2 days ago
He’s not my boyfriend.
OldChicoAle@lemmy.world 2 days ago
You should remind him the next time he asks you to buy body wash
BananaTrifleViolin@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Maybe remind him of that when he’s rude like this. He’s bitching at you for not doing him a favour - rather taking it for granted. And then insulting you for your choice in shower gel.
He cones across as a bit of an asshat.
Sunsofold@lemmings.world 20 hours ago
‘Nah, you’re right. Looking, sounding, and acting like a bitch is bad enough. You don’t want to completely remove all doubt.’
donkeyass@lemmy.sdf.org 10 hours ago
That sounds like it smells great.
sem@lemmy.blahaj.zone 15 hours ago
How is any of this your responsibility lol
TeddE@lemmy.world 15 hours ago
Strictly speaking, if someone asked me to do something and I agree, that makes me responsible. So because they forgot they’re tectonically responsible - but that doesn’t mean the roommate is right. They’re still a stuck-up asshole.
the_riviera_kid@lemmy.world 20 hours ago
Tell him to get his own fucking body wash.
AdolfSchmitler@lemmy.world 23 hours ago
He can get his own body wash then
zebidiah@lemmy.ca 1 day ago
fellas, is it gay to wash yourself?
Deceptichum@quokk.au 1 day ago
Yup. I scrub myself with steel wool.
musubibreakfast@lemm.ee 1 day ago
Super gay, real men walk through the car wash.
Poem_for_your_sprog@lemmy.world 18 hours ago
Especially gay if you wash or wipe your butthole.
Deflated0ne@lemmy.world 10 hours ago
Holy insecurity batman.
rekabis@programming.dev 8 hours ago
It took me until the early 2020s to realize that men even have body washes in the first place.
Keep in mind that I abandoned broadcast TV around 2001 or 2002, so I completely cut all commercials out of my life.
Then when the first adblocker became available for Phoenix (later Firebird, then Firefox) around 2004, I was all over that like white on rice. So since 2004 the only ads I have had to suffer were when I set up a new system whose browsers needed configuring, and later once my browser protections became too strict and I needed a “naked” web browser for user-hostile sites that tied spyware and near-malware into site-critical functionality.
So I have been “out of the advertising loop” for a very long time, and always saw bodywash as a female thing. I quite literally never “got the memo” that body washes came for men.
And I’m not likely to get any, either. And not for any stupidly sexist reasons - after five decades on this rock, I am just habituated on bars of soap. I just don’t like the showering/soaping-up experience without bar soap.
kautau@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Why is it your job to get your roommate body wash? If he’s so picky about the soap he uses, tell him to get all dolled up and go buy it himself.
jonne@infosec.pub 1 day ago
Yeah, definitely not liking the dynamic in that conversation. How are you ‘too busy’ to go into the store?
kautau@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Yeah even the first message sounds shitty outside of anything that isn’t a D/S kink lol. So many better ways to word that where it’s not “did you follow through with my demand?”
“Hey man checking on that body wash I asked you about”
“Oh sorry I forgot”
“No worries, since I don’t like your rose stuff, I’ll just pour a few coors lights over myself right before I dry off. Try to grab it next time you’re out if you can, thanks”
Neurada@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Because this is a fake conversation
HatchetHaro@pawb.social 1 day ago
The fact that much of the world has defined masculinity as “rugged, raw, and remorseless rock n’ roll” is just wild to me.
Imagine denying yourself the ability to enjoy flowery scents and having emotions just to prove that you have a penis.
Witchfire@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Toxic masculinity harms fucking everyone
TheBenCommandments@infosec.pub 1 day ago
Fucking everyone harms toxic masculinity
AccountMaker@slrpnk.net 1 day ago
Seriously. For some people cooking, baking, sewing, cleaning, doing the dishes, laundry are all for women and not “manly”. A “manly man” is then someone who cannot take care of himself at all and needs a mother/nanny substitute his whole life just to survive. And that’s somehow “strong”???
Dicska@lemmy.world 1 day ago
You don’t even need to have emotions while using a scented body wash. You can just go “ah, roses, cool” and get on with it.
There is a legitimate reason to prefer something else. I would also want something that provides freshness in a minty/salty/whatever way. Roses do smell nice, but I would rather have something associated with icy/sporty freshness. But assuming it’s feminine just because it smells like flowers… consult renaissance folks.
funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
I wouldn’t say being unable to buy your own soap is rugged
Ensign_Crab@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Wow. Insecure and entitled. Well, he has to go through life that way.
daggermoon@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Bruh I’d steal my sister’s shampoo. I never gave a quarter of a fuck. It was cool though because women would tell me I smell nice.
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 1 day ago
Yeah the thing about the scents women pick is they pick scents that they like to smell
Whether those scents get them horny is a different question
lka1988@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 day ago
Any time I buy body wash, I pick a few that I like, then run those by my wife to see which one she likes the most. That’s the one I get.
Empricorn@feddit.nl 1 day ago
You’re telling me my Extreme Sport Muscle Mustang Power Jizm scent isn’t preferred by women!?
Dorkyd68@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Dude move out. Fuck this chode
brax@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
Makes somebody else get him body wash, whines about the scent of what was offered in lieu.
Dude’s a total bitch lol