Kolanaki
@Kolanaki@pawb.social
I’m just a weird, furry, pan guy (cis he/him). I also have a big, blue username.
Currently on Earth for 8 years ensuring steps to unite humanity and usher us into the galactic civilization just so I can see my boyfriend again.
- Comment on Could I theoretically grind up one of those pink salt lamps and use it to season my food? 5 minutes ago:
“Bring out the uranium grater and don’t stop grating until I say ‘when.’”
- Comment on Beware 8 hours ago:
Heck, so many roguelikes ONLY have exit saves!
- Comment on Is there anything I can do about the humming of an LED? 8 hours ago:
Are you one of those albino ghost dudes from The Matrix?
- Comment on Would you rather be reincarnated into a world of magic or reborn as yourself (with your current knowledge fully intact)? 8 hours ago:
I’m not respeccing, just leveling it up. It says I can do that.
- Comment on Beware 8 hours ago:
The fact they have this in games that autosave every 5 seconds is annoying as fuck.
“Ah fuck, did it save or not? Now I gotta manually save, jist in case.”
- Comment on Bonjour mes amis! 9 hours ago:
He won’t be damaged by water, will he?
- Comment on Everybody gangsta until the fbi bust in 10 hours ago:
So I’m supposed to carve a swastika into my forehead and brainwash people into killing Sharon Tate?
- Comment on Why can't I change the terms and conditions in a pre-signed contract with a corpo? 11 hours ago:
The contracts literally have a clause that says they can change the terms and conditions at any time. There is no such clause saying you can do the same.
- Comment on Hell in a cell indeed 11 hours ago:
World Wildlife Foundation presents: CAGED ANIMALS
- Comment on He was Christmas dinner 12 hours ago:
rolls 2d6
Somehow gets a nat 20
- Comment on Meme template 12 hours ago:
It’s the transportation of God! THE GOLDEN GOD!
- Comment on On so many occasions 15 hours ago:
“Well it’s shertainly mightier than your mum, Alex.”
- Comment on Local Walmart just installed cameras in the aisles… 15 hours ago:
No such thing as a literal universal key
Skeleton keys?
- Comment on Local Walmart just installed cameras in the aisles… 16 hours ago:
These are some of the cheapest locks you can get and all just use a single tooth to turn the latch.
- Comment on Local Walmart just installed cameras in the aisles… 16 hours ago:
You go to your favorite search engine and enter “universal barrel key.”
- Comment on Local Walmart just installed cameras in the aisles… 16 hours ago:
They still gotta find the ONE employee who has the friggin keys.
- Comment on Local Walmart just installed cameras in the aisles… 16 hours ago:
They literally look like this:
- Comment on Some useful react memes 21 hours ago:
You and me both.
- Comment on Local Walmart just installed cameras in the aisles… 22 hours ago:
They could do it like Minority Report where it scans you as you grab the item and automatically withdraw the money from your bank account. Tho it’s not gonna be reliable, so they’re just gonna be stealing your money just walking by the shelf sometimes.
- Comment on Local Walmart just installed cameras in the aisles… 22 hours ago:
Mine has had these, but only on locked cabinets, for years.
I don’t know if they review 'em tho. Got sick and fucking tired of needing an employee to open the cabinent with the dog treats (most of the time, nobody even comes no matter how long I wait or how many time I press the button for service) so I got my own universal barrel key that opens their cabinets and just take what I need. Sometimes, I even pay for it.
- Comment on WTF Is Happening To The Video Game Industry? 22 hours ago:
They’re just French 🤢
- Comment on WTF Is Happening To The Video Game Industry? 22 hours ago:
Ubisoft isn’t American and does the same shit.
- Comment on It's been a very wet summer around here 23 hours ago:
Dun dun…
Dun dun…
dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun…
- Comment on Would you rather be reincarnated into a world of magic or reborn as yourself (with your current knowledge fully intact)? 1 day ago:
Finna reincarnate without magic and then just pump up my INT so I can invent magic myself.
- Comment on In Star Wars, what would it mean "to bring balance to The Force?" 1 day ago:
Getting the force users to be even split between light side and dark side. That’s why Vader brought balance to the Force; there were way too many good guys.
- Comment on No Spoiler 👁️⃤ 1 day ago:
We landed on the moon!
- Comment on The perfect date 1 day ago:
February 23.
Because it’s muh birfday 😋
- Comment on Just helping out 1 day ago:
Because she can’t find Firefox.
- Comment on Bandwidth 1 day ago:
This pun is so dad-like, it made my balls go back up inside me from the cringe.
Amazing…
- Comment on Gender neutral guide 1 day ago:
So the DM knows what bonuses they have. 😌
