rumba
@rumba@lemmy.zip
- Comment on 2hot2handle 2 days ago:
“Spontaneous” in this usage is highly dependent on frame of reference.
- Comment on Boing 2 days ago:
in Voyager, it goes between full screen and restore, so it’s like you’re bouncing
- Comment on Not stealing 5 days ago:
Yeah, I gathered that.
- Comment on Not stealing 5 days ago:
Two concenting adults :) also figurative… but point taken
- Comment on Not stealing 5 days ago:
I’m perfectly willing to scope down, I’m def not trying to say anything in between the lines.
did the observer genuinely think it was a kidnapping ?
Not likely, most parents have more fear about other people’s thoughts than other people actually have during said thoughts. Unfortunately, you’d be hard-pressed for a stranger to act even if they thought the kid was being stolen. As initially said, we’re scant on fact, he might have had somewhere to be and had to run with the kid. we’ll never know. I don’t love his asshole comment, it doesn’t bode well for him, but I can’t tell him how to live either. We don’t even really have an age on the kid :/
why did the father feel the need to justify?
As others have said, maybe it was a bad joke. The observer seemed to be paying what he perceived as undue attention to them.
In public, I don’t generally feel the need to apologize for toddlers’ behavior unless people are more or less trapped with them (plane, restaurant, maybe a checkout line). If we’re in a department store, they can generally just get out of earshot of us for a hot minute until the kid calms down. Most tantrums are shorter than they feel.
In a restaurant, I’ve historically spent about a minute with misdrecition or bartering serotonin before I just removed them to an outside space to let them calm down. If you have the time, it’s best to take them somewhere without a lot of stimulation and basically ignore the behavior until they get over it. It’s kind of like a minute per year timeout just to let them calm, not as a structured punishment.
It’s not so much a worry about subjecting the public to it as it is about not reinforcing the behavior and helping them learn to soothe. They can be upset, cry, but we’re not moving while we’re having a commotion if at all possible. Over the years, they learn to take a deep breath when they’re upset and not act in frantic rage. Well if you’re lucky, anyway.
We fostered for a number of years before our kids, so I’ve had to deal with a few toddlers who haven’t always been from the best home environments. My wife had been fostering for a decade before we met. However bad you’ve got it, someone out there probably has it worse. Oh god do I have stories.
- Comment on Not stealing 5 days ago:
to me as the dad cracking a dry joke, not actually making
That’s fair. I’d still get smacked upside my head by my wife, but to each their own :)
- Comment on Not stealing 5 days ago:
Nice, see that that’s much better than a one-word snark. We can open a dialog.
I’d say that after raising two, and the youngest only being a handful of years since todler-dom, (and my eldest having spectrum issues), I still feel the pain and confusion, and we even had to seek professional help for the eldest. I’ve actually had training of how to deal with the situations for a child that had real emotional problems.
Judgemental and out of touch.
Yet there you are judging me, betting I don’t have kids, then moving the posts to I don’t have young kids right now.
Let’s disassemble my post:
Hard to tell from so little info.
It’s literally one person’s memory about a guy carrying a toddler throwing a full-on fit through a parking lot. Zero context. But you don’t generally carry them distance while they’re throwing the fit, you remove them from the situation, get them someplace quiet and work with them. 9:10 times they’re just tired and you can calm them and not carry them while they’re screaming enough that you’re scared someone is going to call the authorities.
You can make a kid act like that by being a shitty parent, but they can also have issues unbidden that stretch you past your breaking point.
I didn’t lay blame at the guys feet, I said he might have been stretched thin. That’s not really out of touch by my standards.
In any case, they don’t seem to have a healthy relationship.
If you’re calling your toddler an asshole in public to other strangers, whom you’re worried about the impression they have, that’s clearly not healthy. You can call that judgmental if you’d like, but I can also give you the number of a doctor who will tell you the same.
Now, let’s disassemble your post:
Yes, there is a point I’m trying to make, which is it’s intrinsic to the human condition to paint a much rosier version of your own childrearing experiences once they’re historical.
That’s a great goalpost move. You can disagree with me all you want, but this take is just bad out of context.
The internet is awash with new parents wildly frustrated with how incredibly out-of-touch the platitudes they hear about their experience even coming from other older parents.
Yes, new parents are wildly frustrated that someone tells them what they’re doing is wrong because it seems like a personal attack. It’s not. They survived and are offering how they did it, maybe the advice applies, maybe it doesn’t, everyone situation is different.
Your original comment is just that. Judgemental and out of touch.
If you’re going to call every parent who doesn’t have a 2-3 year-old out of touch, that’s another hot take. If everyone around you is out of touch, it may not be them that is the problem.
You can make a kid act like that? A screaming toddler? There will certainly be times when nothing you can do within the laws of physics can PREVENT them from acting like that. My toddler threw a hysterical fit because the garage door can’t be SIMULTANEOUSLY open AND closed. No, son, I know you believe Daddy can do anything but quantum super positions are even out of my hands.
Screeming all the way across a parking lot? To the point where you have to excuse yourself to others by calling the kid an asshole? within the laws of physics? My toddler threw a hysterical fit because the garage door can’t be SIMULTANEOUSLY open AND closed.
The prime difference here is that you didn’t have to persuade strangers that you were’t stealing the child and call the child an asshole because they were upset about a nonsensical thing. You also didn’t ignore them and carry them through a public place. The scene wasn’t so large than one random person felt the need to do a write up on social media. That’s pretty much the hallmark that the person isn’t handling the situation nominally.
Should the guy have called his kid an asshole? No.
I was defending the guy when someone else said the apple didn’t fall from the tree.
How harshly should you judge them for it? In that moment? Probably not very. Now look in the mirror and tell yourself.
- Comment on Not stealing 5 days ago:
That’s the best you can do. Upset is normal. Throwing things is normal.
Kicking, punching and violence to the point where you have to make excuses that you’re not kidnapping isn’t.
- Comment on Not stealing 5 days ago:
Yeah, one is a teen now and the other is almost there. We have solid relationships and I’ve managed not to call them assholes when they’re acting up. Is there a point you’re trying to make?
- Comment on Not stealing 5 days ago:
I’ve had two, go fish.
- Comment on Not stealing 5 days ago:
Hard to tell from so little info. You can make a kid act like that by being a shitty parent, but they can also have issues unbidden that stretch you past your breaking point.
In any case, they don’t seem to have a healthy relationship.
- Comment on 6 days ago:
Honestly, it’s kind of hard to tell. We’re missing a hell of a lot of intent and access to the evidence here.
If he was just straight up vengeful, He should have been on the hook for the lost wages they paid for all the people that were knocked offline. The cost of whatever contractors they used to repair the problem. 6 months jail time and some psychiatric review.
If he had the intent of blackmailing them, then felony and probably pulling his work visa.
As it sits, even if he had some way to keep his right to work here, there are a few that would touch him with a 10-ft pole. He’s required to disclose felonies as part of the hiring process pretty much everywhere. Anybody prospective employers are going to be extremely reluctant to give him any work that would afford him access to their network.
- Comment on 6 days ago:
What he did was brazen and stupid but 4 years sounds a bit excessive. Unless the journalist is under reporting what happened, he didn’t do any long-term damage just probably knocked them offline for a day and required somebody to come in and manually reset the drsm account in the domain controller.
But in a fit of rage and passion he built out booby traps and put his name all over everything. He wanted them to know it was him, How do you absolutely denied himself plausible deniability.
All he had to do was pretend he was inept and replace service accounts with his own login. Push 90-day password resets on the account for ‘security’. Set up a house of cards out of security certificates.
The company probably walked into that court with a technically competent team of lawyers and a bunch of expert testimony, he probably had a state defender.
- Comment on YOU HAVE NO POWER HERE 1 week ago:
See this comment:
cheers, thanks for that!
- Comment on YOU HAVE NO POWER HERE 1 week ago:
Or an oarfish or anything from the midnight zone that actually has eyes
- Comment on YOU HAVE NO POWER HERE 1 week ago:
I wonder if that afforded some level of protection to the surface dwellers’ receptors when in direct contact with high levels of sunlight.
- Comment on 'Ad Blocking is Not Piracy' Decision Overturned By Top German Court 1 week ago:
Seriously people, we don’t need to live out Idiocracy. It was just a movie, not a prediction.
- Comment on They'd just appear out of nowhere 1 week ago:
I had one once, a decade ago, no pain, but mine was black and white squares, some had x’s in them, it looked like some unholly mix of Apple and Xwindows just righ there in my vision in just about that overall shape you displayed. I also felt SUPER disconnected at the time. My wife and I were picking stuff up at storage, I just ignored it, got what i needed from storage and it went away in less than 5 minutes. I was thankful to not have the oft associated headache
- Comment on Is Germany on the Brink of Banning Ad Blockers? User Freedom, Privacy, and Security Is At Risk. 2 weeks ago:
___________ seems to be speed-running becoming another shit-hole dystopian country
I don’t know what the f happened It’s like somebody just flipped a stupid switch
- Comment on ChatGPT 5 power consumption could be as much as eight times higher than GPT 4 — research institute estimates medium-sized GPT-5 response can consume up to 40 watt-hours of electricity 2 weeks ago:
The average usage has to handily outstrip the cost of the service.
You can see it running the queries and then running more queries to see if it did the right thing and then running searches to verify things. It’s not like I need it to do eight separate queries to remind me of the kubernetes pod enumeration command.
Work requires us to have it, and I use it to create effect for time saving, But there is absolutely no way that they’re making any money on it what I’m doing with it for the price they’re paying for a month for me. It’ll be interesting when we’re on the other side of this bubble and the tokens are pay as you go how much they still want me to use it.
- Comment on The european mind can't comprehend this 2 weeks ago:
Yeah, that’s just a redistribution of weight in our legs are good for it.
Last time it was in a country with a lot of pickpocketing I just wanted to put a little open baggie of automotive grease in my breast pocket. I was bump checked three times in Paris in one block.
- Comment on Me too. 2 weeks ago:
I’ve never seen an organic political stance before… that’s amazing.
- Comment on 2 weeks ago:
Sounds to me like they need to charge the AI data centers enough to cover the bill instead of making me pay it.
- Comment on Incident 2 weeks ago:
Daycare is kind of intense.
You have a bunch of parents who would rather be with their kids. They’re paying close to their own mortgage/rent to have their kids watched. They’re convinced that the teens/young adults the daycare hires are not doing anything. Their kids are there with a load of other kids, pick up bad habits, get bullied and yelled at by kids in worse home situations. As soon any any scratch or scrape happens they want to know know for those prices.
The timesheets give them solace that their kid is being watched, fed, changed, and taken care of emotionally.
it’s not necessary, but it’s not hard to see why it happens
- Comment on [deleted] 2 weeks ago:
Good people spend way too much time worrying about being embarrassed.
Take it, show up clean, well dressed, wearing just a hint of something that smells good.
Do something fun and engaging. This isn’t a girlfriend, this isn’t a perspective girlfriend, this is you, going out to do something fun. Your goal is to have a shared fun experience with the other person. If it turns into more, Great. If it doesn’t turn into more you had fun.
Your primary goal is to not make a bad impression everything else is left to the wind.
- Comment on Tried naming the states from memory as a European 2 weeks ago:
Yeah that whole desert racists/breaking bad/vegas section is more of a venn diagram.
- Comment on Anon goes home 2 weeks ago:
Aging brings along the realization of how many things only exist in your memory, and even if they are recorded or memorialized no one will ever experience them the way you did.
That restaurant with your parents, That Mall, staying with distant family in some house that was sold 30 years ago or outright bulldozed. Those places are only special to you, and when you cease to exist, they won’t be special in the same exact way to anyone else. It’s the stupid childhood memories that honestly don’t mean anything on their own that feel the worst IMO
- Comment on My new laptop chip has an 'AI' processor in it, and it's a complete waste of space 2 weeks ago:
I’m not exactly an expert either but I believe the NPUs were seeing in the wild here are more like efficiency cores for AI.
Using the GPU would be faster, but have much larger energy consumption. They’re basically mathco processors that are good at matrix calculations.
- Comment on Lemmy be like 2 weeks ago:
You can try, and you should try. But some handful of generations ago, some assholes were in the right place at the right time and struck it rich. The ones that figured out generational wealth ended up with a disproportionate amount of power. The formula to use money to make more money was handed down, coddled, and protected to keep the rich and powerful in power. Even 100 Luigi’s wouldn’t even make the tiniest dent in the oligarch pyramid as others will just swoop in and consume their part.
Any lifelong pursuit you have to make the world a better place than you were raised in will be wiped out with a scribble of black Sharpie on Ministry of Truth letterhead.
- Comment on Them 2 weeks ago:
it’s like gnome, but it already looks and works like I want without digging out half a dozen plugins that break all the time :)