Girls have a super power they can use to live rent free in any guy’s head rent free pretty much eternally. All they need to do is catch them off guard with a compliment.
A guy will keep a shirt until it literally disintegrates if one time a girl said “that color looks good on you.” Pretty much every guy that wears a particular cologne, wears that cologne because at some point a girl said he smelled nice. It’s not even a horny brain thing I don’t think. It’s just that guys get so few compliments on their appearance that every single one is massively precious to them.
sin_free_for_00_days@sopuli.xyz 3 weeks ago
It’s such a dichotomy. Women get catcalled every day and feel uncomfortable and harassed. Understandable. The average man gets catcalled a handful of times in his life and cherishes those moments almost as much as their children’s births.
Mac@mander.xyz 3 weeks ago
Women drown in the ocean whereas men die of thirst in the desert.
This is obviously an overgeneralization, but it matches the experience of many.
BastingChemina@slrpnk.net 3 weeks ago
I heard a similar analogy, men are in a desert, women in a swamp. In both cases they struggle to find drinkable water.
MountingSuspicion@reddthat.com 3 weeks ago
I think the difference is that this isn’t catcalling. If women’s compliments towards men were the same as men’s compliments towards women, I think men would also dislike it. Don’t get me wrong, I recognize that men don’t get compliments often, and often they stick with them, but generally those are complements and not catcalls.
damnedfurry@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Nah.
Every time I’ve ever heard of an experiment where indignant women do/say to men the exact same things that they hate getting from men, they’re always astonished to see the men’s reactions as practically universally positive:
Chev@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Catcalling ≠ Complimenting
Catcalling is about letting the other know, that you want to fuck or harass them.
Complimenting is about verbalising beauty without any other expectations towards the other person.
mosiacmango@lemm.ee 3 weeks ago
There is an old idiom that goes “everything about sex except sex. That’s about power.”
Catcalling is about expressing power over someone else bodt and life. It’s a veiled threat, coached in sexual terms. No one doing it actually expects to have sex afterwards. Its about sayihg “i can force sex on you. I can take control of you.”
A lot of the men engaging in it above are doing it because of peer pressure, normalized misogyny and the “thrill” of getting an acknowledgement of that power by scaring women. I dont think most of them want to attack women outright to begin with, but it normalizes mixing sex with violence and dehumanizing woman.
SnortsGarlicPowder@lemmy.zip 3 weeks ago
Eh being 14 and an adult woman shouting out of a cat at me to get my cock out I feel is about as gross and threatening as it would be if the genders were reversed.
refurbishedrefurbisher@lemmy.sdf.org 2 weeks ago
Kind of gross and threatening even as an adult TBH.
captainlezbian@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
As someone who’s been catcalled many many times while presenting female and once while presenting male (by women). Yeah tbh it felt similarly threatening. When you’re walking alone in the dark all big burly and bearded and just hear a voice calling out sexualizing you it’s scary. Like in retrospect now I can recognize that it was probably a drunk/high/low inhibitioned young woman displaying the confidence of youth when surrounded by friends. But I was scared because if she’s comfortable doing this she probably knows something I don’t if she chooses to escalate.
GoodLuckToFriends@lemmy.today 3 weeks ago
The fear is from the group dynamics more than anything else. Gender almost plays no part in it. Age plays almost no part in it. There are several stories about a group of teens attacking a lone adult, and it goes just about as you’d expect. Anyone who is alone and suddenly becomes the focus of attention by a group will (and probably should) become worried, whereas if you’re in a group the (that is, your) reaction can be anything from ignoring to playing along because you have less to fear. All of us can imagine the difference between walking in a group or by yourself when getting catcalled. Most of us have probably seen the difference.
drascus@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
My god if I could just get one compliment I could die happy.
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
I like your username, and you have great taste in Lemmy instances.
TheBat@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Live long you absolute potato
Owlboi@lemm.ee 3 weeks ago
women get so much attention its like theyre drowning. men get so little its like theyre starving in the desert.
truly ironic
SuperDuperKool@lemmy.cafe 3 weeks ago
Maybe you do you creep