ChickenLadyLovesLife
@ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world
- Comment on Have you noticed the new way of promoting horrible food by telling you it has lots of protein 23 hours ago:
My dad’s doctor told him he needed to eat more protein, and he was like “ChickenLady, what can I eat to get more protein? High-protein Boost?” No dad, fucking meat … you can eat more meat. The thing is he loved meat, but it never occurred to him that he got protein from meat. And he was a biology professor!
My favorite thing was my mother at one point thinking she needed to eliminate her intake of fats, carbohydrates and protein because they’re all bad for you. Fortunately she does like kale …
- Comment on What life hack helped you this year? 2 days ago:
Interestingly, the calorie counts on food packaging are derived from the Atwater system (and later modifications) that estimate digestible calories from the amount of fat, protein and carbohydrates in each food item. These numbers are based on experimental research on food substitution and weight loss/gain done in the late 1800s and early 1900s. The calorie counts for alcohol are similarly based on the measurable amount of alcohol in each drink, except that the number used (7 kcal per g) was just a complete guess on Atwater’s part since they couldn’t do equivalent substitution experiments involving booze.
- Comment on Anon has a boyfriend 2 days ago:
It’s more like chicken garlic.
- Comment on Anon has a boyfriend 2 days ago:
10 cloves garlic
Fuckin’ righteous
- Comment on *confused flatfish noises* 4 days ago:
Horseshoe crabs have nine different types of eyes. Even that tail is essentially a kind of eye, covered with photoreceptors. Not sure of the relevance of this horseshoe crab fact, it’s just fucking interesting.
- Comment on *confused flatfish noises* 4 days ago:
Squirrels have eyes on the sides of their heads and they’re pretty fucking good and climbing and jumping. Next theory …
- Comment on Piano man 1 week ago:
I don’t know if this is the place for this, but god damn is the original Billy Joel song cringeworthy. “Making love to his tonic and gin”, something absolutely nobody ever says (it’s “gin and tonic”). “Talking to Davy who’s still in the navy” is another example of mangling shit to fit the rhyme scheme. And it’s all just a song about how awesome and better-than-this he, Billy Joel, is (“man, what are you doin’ here?”).
Would be the most lyrically embarrassing song of all time if not for “We Didn’t Start the Fire”.
- Comment on Every accusation is a confession? More like everything is a confession 2 weeks ago:
When was the last time Switzerland actively made first strikes
I’m not sure, but I know halberds were involved.
- Comment on Every accusation is a confession? More like everything is a confession 2 weeks ago:
They got rid of the exploding roads, though. Or so they say.
- Comment on Every accusation is a confession? More like everything is a confession 2 weeks ago:
I remember when the original name for the invasion of Iraq was “Operation Iraqi Liberation” until somebody decided that was a little too obvious an acronym.
- Comment on be a friend to the animals 2 weeks ago:
HOA’s don’t allow watching Friends? I thought HOAs were bad.
- Comment on The Palantir Stare aka The Thiel Razzle 3 weeks ago:
I randomly got a job recommendation from one of the sites that looked for exactly my programming skill set. I was interested until I saw what company it was – Palantir. GOD DAMN IT.
- Comment on where the cuties 4 weeks ago:
Or gravy!
- Comment on sushi delivery 4 weeks ago:
When I first started cooking I used to burn the rice all the time and I had to throw it all away. Then one day I had dinner at a Persian restaurant and they brought me some of the charred rice (called “tahdig”) as a special treat. It was a real eye-opener (tongue-opener?) because that shit is incredibly delicious. They regretted serving it to me because I started begging for it every time I went, which is apparently a rather rude thing to do.
Korean dol sat bibim bap is similar. It’s a dish served in a massively hot stone bowl with the rice on the bottom, and the longer you let it sit there before mixing everything together, the more the rice chars and the better it tastes. It’s almost crazy how much charred rice is not a thing in world cuisines when it’s actually incredibly delicious.
- Comment on Ok, boomer 5 weeks ago:
Can also be used if you agree with former Bengals QB Boomer Esiason.
- Comment on Better safe than sorry 5 weeks ago:
I’m a Cognitive Developmental Transportation Engineer … aka school bus driver.
- Comment on Anon studies Organic Chemistry 5 weeks ago:
There’s a trade school near me that is fucking free. They have a huge endowment and that pays for everything, even room and board for the on-campus students. They still have to advertise and meanwhile kids go $300K into debt to get a degree in English Lit. I’m all for a classic Liberal Arts education but god damn.
- Comment on mercy merci 5 weeks ago:
My mom taught me growing up to deal with spiders like this. She proudly told me how her dad had taught her to do it. Now she’s nearly 90 and when she sees a spider she’s like KILL THAT FUCKIN THING!!!*
- Comment on Banana 5 weeks ago:
My local Acme carried red bananas for a while. They are fucking delicious, taste more like a banana custard than a regular yellow banana. They’re also a bit smaller so less of a commitment to carbo-loading when you peel one. I wouldn’t mind at all if they became the new standard banana, even if it would kind of ruin Mario Kart.
- Comment on I AM BETTER 1 month ago:
“Jimmy Page wrote Stairway to Heaven when he was 23, but I learned to play it at 18.”
- Comment on AWS crash causes $2,000 Smart Beds to overheat and get stuck upright 1 month ago:
You had me until “unless”.
- Comment on What was I thinking? 1 month ago:
I shave my head. I have to shave it every two or three days or I look like a mangy old dog. I wait until just before I go to bed to shave it, at which point I’m too tired and I tell myself I’ll do it in the morning before work, which of course I never do. So I end up shaving it once every three weeks, and spend most of the time looking like a mangy old dog.
I eventually hit upon the strategy of shaving a small patch somewhere on my head before I go to bed, which forces me to do the rest of the job in the morning before work. Except that I usually forget I did that and often go to work looking like a mangy old dog that somebody tried to shave before giving up. Fortunately I’m a school bus driver so I only scare children.
- Comment on American public transit 1 month ago:
I used to bike to work when I lived in Louisiana. It was fortunate that my office was a block from the YMCA, so I could shower and change after my ride in. The downside was that the Y was the hangout of the fat old white men who worked at the courthouse and like to lounge around naked on the couches in the locker room, laughing and making jokes about sending black men to Angola prison for decades for crimes they probably didn’t commit (these were judges, prosecutors and public defenders talking about this shit).
- Comment on American public transit 1 month ago:
I had a few years where I rode the train from a stop a mile from my house to a station literally in the basement of the building I worked in. A 55 minute ride where I could read peacefully or nap, absolute heaven. I didn’t even like moving to WFH because I missed the restaurants in the city.
- Comment on World would be a better place 1 month ago:
I used to even have props for some gags
Imagine trying to convert people and you run into fucking Carrot Top.
- Comment on World would be a better place 1 month ago:
I used to canvas door-to-door for a public interest group, so I almost always give them some cash and offer them water and a bathroom break. It was an absolutely horrific job and I’m sure it’s even worse today. I still want them to move the fuck on as quickly as possible, though.
I still remember the best interaction I ever had going door-to-door. We were raising money to help fight rising insurance rates, and I was talking to one old guy standing next to his truck. He listened to my spiel and then said “I’ll tell you why insurance rates are so high: it’s because the n*****rs are burning the cities down.” I said “well that’s what we’re fighting, sir” and he gave me $25.
- Comment on World would be a better place 1 month ago:
I like the solicitors who put their sales brochures in ziplock bags with some rocks and toss it onto your driveway. It gives me rocks to throw at all the other solicitors.
- Comment on World would be a better place 1 month ago:
“I’d let you in, but I prefer Mormons. They have better porn.”
- Comment on one bright second 1 month ago:
conscious energy systems or something
Like Kevin Spacey? Ew.
- Comment on one bright second 1 month ago:
I suppose you could wish for all genies to be instantly annihilated. Maybe toss the GOP in there for good measure.