MountingSuspicion
@MountingSuspicion@reddthat.com
- Comment on Anon tries to meet girls at college 1 week ago:
The cringe is so real. I had a guy bring his gaming laptop to a third date at my place. I was super into him and we went to my bedroom and he just set up his laptop. I could not pull him away from showing me his cool single player gaming collection. It’s my fault because I kept going out with guys I met at cons. After the third time you think I’d learn my lesson but I didn’t stop until poly became more pervasive and I ended up on dates with people who just forgot to mention that. I don’t mind poly but you should be upfront about it. So glad I don’t have to date anymore. It’s an absolute disaster out there. Best of luck to everyone still doing it.
- Comment on Anon tries to meet girls at college 1 week ago:
It’s good parenting to be aware of that sort of thing, but as you seem to guess I wouldn’t worry too much. Kids are kind of just like that. I have a 13 yr old in my life right now and she is pretty similar, so I think it’s healthy. The last thing we want to do as adults is make them feel small or like their thoughts and interests don’t matter.
For what it’s worth I don’t mind talkers, it really is just about place/time/topic. I’m sure he’ll make it through. I hear encouraging questions about others helps, “thank you for asking”/“what a great question” etc. but I don’t know if it really helps so much as is something we do in the interim to feel like we’re helping while they just mature in the background. Seems like you’re on top of it though. Best of luck to you both!
- Comment on Anon tries to meet girls at college 1 week ago:
Not quite as bad, but I went on a date with someone that just explained video games I hadn’t played. He would ask about a video game and if I hadn’t played it he’d speak about it uninterrupted for 10-20 minutes explaining the levels. Not even interesting lore or anything. It would be like listening to someone explain a speedrun, but their speedrun is just playing the game normally. I like video games and play with my partners and friends, and I even watch videos about video games I haven’t played and I could only stand 3 of these rounds before ending the date. He was completely uninterested in talking about anything else and didn’t even want to talk about games I had actually played. Only games I knew nothing about. Totally bizarre. It felt like a prank. Would make a great greentext from his perspective though.
- Comment on AI agents wrong ~70% of time: Carnegie Mellon study 1 month ago:
If you think we should offload to AI even if it’s worse, I have serious questions about your day to day life. What industry do you think could stand to be worse? Doctor’s offices? Lawyers? Mechanics? Accounts?
The end user (aka the PEOPLE NEEDING A SERVICE) are the ones getting screwed over when companies offload to AI. You tell AI to schedule an appointment tomorrow, and 80% of the time it does and 20% it just never does or puts it on for next week. That hurts both the office trying to maximize the people seen/helped and the person that needs the help. Working less hours due to tech advancement is awesome, but in reality offloading to AI in the current work climate is not going to result in working less hours. Additionally, how costly is each task the AI is doing? Are the machines running off of renewables, or is using this going to contribute to worse air quality and worse climate outcomes for people you’re trying to save from working more. People shouldn’t have to work their lives away, but we have other problems that need to be solved before prematurely switching to AI.
- Comment on Anon's best friend is a repper 2 months ago:
I mostly interact with two kinds of people and it’s either 1) people who think any deviation is sinful or 2) people who don’t notice or comment on others gender expression/identity unless the person brings it up. I’m not suggesting that there is no middle ground, but the thought that young people as a whole aren’t more interested/able in exploring gender as a spectrum and gender expression as a whole is just patently false.
The reason I bothered to mention that I’m a gender abolitionist is because it read to me like they were anti the whole concept of gender and believe that young people are just reinforcing it by lumping things in as “trans coded”. Aka “boy liking girl things is trans” should be “just a thing a boy likes”. But people aren’t saying “liking girl things makes you trans”. I’m stating that young people are actually better at exploring gender than others. I’m not saying young people are all progressive, just responding to the perceived point and saying that young people (more than other generations) are more flexible in their perception of gender. To me it seems like they are lamenting how instead of breaking down gender norms, people are using it to reinforce the gender stereotype.
I do agree we’re all (including them) on the same side. I did reread it before my previous response just to double check, but I appreciate you suggesting that. I want to be clear that I don’t think their comment is right wing, just that the talking point “society uses trans people to enforce gender norms” is sometimes used by the right as well.
I understand that reasonable minds can interpret statements differently. To me it reads like they were lamenting how trans ideology is kind of reinforcing gender. To you it reads like they are lamenting the lack of some people’s ability to explore gender. That’s totally ok. Hopefully they chime in and make their intent clear. Either way I hope we all get to a place where we can live as and present as whatever we wish whenever we wish.
- Comment on Anon's best friend is a repper 2 months ago:
They said: “They’re very rigidly stuck inside little Identity boxes anyway. You’re automatically “trans coded” if you’re a guy but like dresses, looking pretty and shaving.”
That stuck out to me as some of the same trans fear mongering that the right wing uses when they say “tomgirls are a thing. You don’t have to be trans”.
Im not saying they are right wing, but the idea that doing something gender nonconforming signals that you’re trans is not correct and in my experience not a widely popular belief among young people. It seems to me like they were saying people are too quick to call people trans and that’s just not the case. If that wasn’t their point, I’m not sure what they meant by suggesting that someone is “automatically trans coded”.
I agree that there are still spaces where it’s not safe, but I don’t see that argument being made in the comment.
- Comment on Anon's best friend is a repper 2 months ago:
Your comment shows either a very limited knowledge of queer identities or potentially large regional differences in the younger gens, because agender, bigender, and gender nonconforming people make up more of younger gens than they do older gens. So many young men are getting into makeup, nail polish, and wearing dresses and skirts. Way more than the older gens.
I’m a gender abolitionist, but your comment is either misguided or outright false.
pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9380989/
“Boomers+ and Generation X groups were more likely to identify as trans women compared to the younger generational cohorts, who were more varied in their identities.”
- Comment on Banned across multiple communities, posts deleted, for upsetting a mod 2 months ago:
I guess this section seems to indicate otherwise: “Like everyone else, you see issues in your environment - but unlike most people, you actually try to understand them and find solutions. And for that, you get nothing but pain.”
But I will take you at your word that you were more commiserating than directly agreeing. The internet in general is leading to more tribalism, sure, but I’m not seeing it any more on Lemmy than I am elsewhere. Mostly seeing it as it relates to politics. Would you mind sharing where you’re seeing that? Have you noticed specific communities or instances or topics? I follow a variety of content and it’s mostly pretty chill people with some political vitriol sprinkled in for novelty sake.
- Comment on Banned across multiple communities, posts deleted, for upsetting a mod 2 months ago:
I don’t know if you’re a guy, but honestly really amazing display of allyship right here. Regardless, congrats on explaining things so succinctly. This is exactly correct.
- Comment on Banned across multiple communities, posts deleted, for upsetting a mod 2 months ago:
But their comment objectively is less productive than the “angry posts”, because their comment was against the rules and deleted and not engaged with, whereas the “angry posts” are there for the community to engage with and offer sympathy and understanding and a place to vent. It’s a kind of weird martyr complex that nobody asked for. Oh, woe is me, I got banned for breaking the rules! Why even comment in the first place if you knew it was going to be deleted? Elsewhere someone provided context that they did not comment on a “Meta” post. It was just a post complaining about how people treat the community. It was not at all soliciting advice or external opinions. They then went out of their way to break the rules and essentially prove the post right. Essentially showing that they think they are above the rules and that their opinion deserves to be heard regardless of what the user or the mods or the community has already expressed. Saying he was somehow “starting a discussion” makes no sense considering he knew that he would get banned and his comment removed. That was neither the time nor place to start any kind of discussion, and quite frankly I don’t think somebody attempting to have a good faith discussion would have it in that manner. If a transphobe went into a trans space that explicitly did not allow transphobes, and made a comment lamenting that they can’t ask questions in that community, would you still feel similarly? They just “see a wrong” in the world and are trying to start a discussion about it. Or would you think that it is OK for some spaces to have rules that are not up for discussion, especially within that space?
He might not have known that he would be getting banned from other subs, but as a user of several subs, I fully support admins taking steps to block people who willingly break rules of other marginalized communities. I think reasonable minds can disagree on this last point, but blahaj is pretty famous for being strict with bans even if not on the community/instance in question and the users of that instance actually really like that. I don’t know if this will be escalated, or if the ban will even stay in place, but my understanding is that people like that instance specifically because the mods there are so vigilant.
- Comment on Banned across multiple communities, posts deleted, for upsetting a mod 2 months ago:
I’m not trying to get into an argument here, and based on your one sentence response, it seems like you’re not either, but angry posts in general don’t mean anything. I see a lot of angry posts about healthcare or the government or the increasing descent into fascism, and if somebody commented on any of those that they didn’t like seeing it, I wouldn’t necessarily think that comment was productive. Posts are allowed to be angry because people are allowed to be angry. Especially about injustice and oppression, which I imagine a lot of the “angry posts” are actually about, considering it’s a community of marginalized people for marginalized people. Just something to think about.
- Comment on Banned across multiple communities, posts deleted, for upsetting a mod 2 months ago:
Thank you so much for providing that context. It is so funny that they said that their original post is in good faith, when even this post describing the situation isn’t in good faith.
- Comment on Banned across multiple communities, posts deleted, for upsetting a mod 2 months ago:
I posted elsewhere in this thread, but I don’t see how actively and knowingly posting while breaking the rules of a community is seen as posting in good faith. If they are soliciting opinions from their community, and you were not part of their community, then your opinion is not one they are looking for.
The people who made a woman only community are doing exactly what you think they should do. They are seeing the overwhelming hate being directed towards women in online spaces, and trying to create a space exclusively for women. You might not like that, but that is what they have chosen to do to fix what they see as an issue. I don’t see how you think OP is being the change he wants to see and that the mods are in the wrong. OP is not a woman and cannot speak to the female experience. Even within the female experience, plenty of people disagree. That’s why it’s great that there is plenty of space for other people to make their own communities. Going into a community that has made their stance clear, and is for people that regularly face hate and oppression, especially online, and deciding that is the big injustice you see in the world is certainly a choice. There are plenty of places and communities that openly spread hate not just for women, but for LGBT people of which OP says they are. Maybe they should spend time criticizing those spaces instead of picking on a group of already marginalized people who happen to have a single point of disagreement on how to run their space.
- Comment on Banned across multiple communities, posts deleted, for upsetting a mod 2 months ago:
So you broke rules on purpose in a community for people who experience oppression and are upset when other communities have solidarity with that community and don’t want people who break rules on purpose in their space. Just because other people break rules doesn’t mean you should. Posting while knowingly breaking rules is not actually posting in good faith.
The rules aren’t fuzzy. These mods are trying to protect spaces for vulnerable people and see that you don’t respect those spaces. Seems pretty cut and dry. If you don’t like the way those communities are run, make your own.
- Comment on That's a good question 2 months ago:
Yeah, that makes sense. Do you mind me asking what kind of church you went to? Was it nondenominational or did it have a denomination?
- Comment on That's a good question 2 months ago:
Not hating on your church or anything, but isn’t his death the whole point? Like if he didn’t die in that manner and then theoretically come back, he’d just be some guy. There’d be no need for the religion. I feel like his death makes the whole thing come full circle. It’s not just about being good, it’s about then being willing to sacrifice for the good of everyone.
- Comment on Tinder tests letting users set a 'height preference' 2 months ago:
I’m a woman and not on tinder, but I don’t know why people don’t like this. Anyone listing a height preference is not the kind of person you should be looking for, especially if you don’t fit their preference imho. It’s literally self filtering, though it did say it’s not fully blocking or anything.
I know women who would’ve loved that feature and I would never suggest any of my friends date them. Even after they dated guys that didn’t fit the criteria and amicably split, they still held firm to the idea. I think it’s ok to have preferences, but this is dumb to filter for and people are dumb to want to match with these people.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
Yea, that’s basically my point. I don’t know why the desire is to be an attractive woman. Why not wish to be attractive man? Attractive men get plenty of action. What is it about being a woman specifically? I’m not saying they’re trans, I just think it’s worth some self reflection.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
Are you gay? Your comment lower in this thread seem to indicate you are attracted to women. An attractive woman might be able to fuck a lot of men, but if you’re not gay I don’t know why you’d deem that outcome as desirable.
- Comment on Anon plays vidya with the bros 2 months ago:
Extremely sorry to hear you’re having a tough time. I’m not a guy, so I cannot speak from direct experience, but just judging from my male friends it seems like the “find a social hobby” advice really works. I know you didn’t ask for advice, but I really don’t have much else to offer other than my sympathy. I hope things get better for you (and everyone tbh).
- Comment on Anon plays vidya with the bros 2 months ago:
It is such a clear sign of differences in socialization, because you will never find a more supportive group than a bunch of drunk female friends (in my experience). Really sad to see the lack of men supporting men, but hopefully it’s getting better as the years go on.
- Comment on Google’s New AI Puts Breasts on Minors—And J. D. Vance 3 months ago:
Part of it is likely that she is a famous woman who is not known for being sexualized and is considered a public figure. No one wants to have the scientific standard be “I used pics of this girl I had a crush on” so I imagine famous people are good to pick from. I imagine Merkel also doesn’t have a lot of bikini pics AI can draw from (some amount of swimming pics are unfortunately always available for public figures for some reason) so you can be sure it’s generated them from nothing. If you used a famous model, there may be a possibility it is using pics of them to model their chest. If you’re testing what it does with random inputs, using Merkel is probably a good option.
As far as the output being what was requested, I think the issue can vary depending on your view of AI so I am just going to leave that part unanswered because if it’s a problem or not relies so much on your priors.
- Comment on Anon is not a merciful cod 3 months ago:
That potentially just gives GameStop more money and unnecessarily adds tension to a holiday where a parent is just trying to make their kid happy. Fuck GameStop and all, but this parent was put in a bad position on purpose by someone who knew better and who ostensibly was being paid to help people like them out (post is fake obviously though). It’s not their fault GameStop sucks, and it’s not the kids fault either.
- Comment on AMC Theatres Quarterly Losses Hit $202.1 Million After Box Office Got Off to Rocky Start 3 months ago:
I’m not complaining about the price, but you can definitely complain about the price regardless of how often you go. I don’t go to Disney every year but I can still say it’s overpriced.
I was just saying that if theaters are hurting for customers I understand why. If people are spending $60 just on tickets for a family of four they are probably not going to be going very often. We don’t go very often and we make a whole event out of it and don’t spend much more than the $60. People that buy popcorn and snacks for everyone at their local theater end up spending as much as we do and we get dinner and drinks out of it. Unless there’s a discount running or the theater is a specialty theater like the one I go to they don’t really offer a better experience than you can get at home for the price. The only draw imho is that the movie is new and nowadays things hit streaming pretty shortly after release. Generic theaters just don’t offer enough for the price and the evidence is that they are failing. People loved having movie pass so it seems like there’s still a desire to go, just not at current prices.
- Comment on AMC Theatres Quarterly Losses Hit $202.1 Million After Box Office Got Off to Rocky Start 3 months ago:
As someone who also didn’t have movie snacks until I could pay for them myself, I think part of it is that snacks add to the experience. If I’m paying for my family to go to the movies it’s supposed to be something nice. We have movie nights at home and buy popcorn in bulk so we can all cuddle up on the couch and snack to our hearts content or pause if someone spills or needs the restroom.
I go to the movies once every few years now and it’s always for a big blowout movie where we can dress up and we go to a fancy theater that does food service and has dedicated layzboy style seats. We went and saw Barbie and all wore pink and got themed food/drinks at the theater (pink lemonade and Barbie-q-something). It was fun and imho that’s the kind of theater experience worth having. I don’t really remember seeing movies as a kid with my family but I’m sure we’ll all remember this.
I think the idea of spending $60 for a family of four to sit in silence together and then leave is just not as appealing unless they get the “theater experience” of the addons. I’m also not one complaining though because I generally don’t care about seeing things in the theater and I don’t really know what it’s worth to people who would enjoy it. I do understand that it doesn’t feel worth $60 though.
- Comment on Jeremy Renner Turned Down ‘Hawkeye’ Season 2 Because He Was Offered ‘Half’ His Season 1 Salary: ‘Did You Think I’m Only Half the Jeremy Because I Got Ran Over?’ 3 months ago:
How/when did they get in trouble? I didn’t hear anything about it and nothing came up immediately after a search. It seems like a huge jump to say that they are going to be forced out of the industry. Additionally, he was still offered millions of dollars. Plenty of people would have jumped at the opportunity.
AI is definitely going to be a problem for the industry but your comment seems like a stretch.
- Comment on Jeremy Renner Turned Down ‘Hawkeye’ Season 2 Because He Was Offered ‘Half’ His Season 1 Salary: ‘Did You Think I’m Only Half the Jeremy Because I Got Ran Over?’ 3 months ago:
I read the wiki and a few articles about it a while ago when I saw the video that brought attention to the app: youtu.be/od7P-RhLjLQ
I don’t think the wiki or any articles I read seem misleading. I understand that he did not personally set any of this up, but having a separate app where people pay money to interact with you seems like shitty behavior for a celeb who is already beyond rich. I’m not saying it’s as bad as a crypto rug pull, but it’s giving similar energy. Clearly there are some people who were getting something out of the app, but it feels kind of predatory. If he wanted super fans to keep up with him he can just send out a newsletter. I get notifications when certain people I follow are touring near me and it doesn’t require a special app. I would probably feel differently if he put a lot of effort into engaging with fans there but it would still feel tainted with the fact that some people are spending money with the hope he’ll notice them.
It’s like having a patreon with no actual perks. If Taylor swift or timothee chalamet made a patreon and you could maybe get some nebulous benefit from joining I would think that’s also shitty behavior. It’s not illegal, and I understand that in theory the app was free, but the conceit is to make money off these parasocial relationships with you and it’s just gross imho. At least with merch or patreon subs you know what you’re paying for. I highly doubt he was even the one responding to most super fans seeing as most posts were copy/pasted from other social media platforms. He probably had some doing it for him.
- Comment on Jeremy Renner Turned Down ‘Hawkeye’ Season 2 Because He Was Offered ‘Half’ His Season 1 Salary: ‘Did You Think I’m Only Half the Jeremy Because I Got Ran Over?’ 3 months ago:
I didn’t watch it but my understanding is that Hawkeye passed on the torch and he probably was going to be more in the background instead of the star. I don’t know the exact parameters but I imagine it would not be as much screen time or physically demanding scenes. Fuck Disney for being a shitty company but I’m not sure if this is 100% attributable to that.
- Comment on Jeremy Renner Turned Down ‘Hawkeye’ Season 2 Because He Was Offered ‘Half’ His Season 1 Salary: ‘Did You Think I’m Only Half the Jeremy Because I Got Ran Over?’ 3 months ago:
I was never a fan of his, but when I saw this I decided he’s just not a good person. What a gross thing to do to people who support you. I hope to not have to see him in anything going forward.
- Comment on Anon has his way 4 months ago:
Agreed. Peace and love.