Hossenfeffer
@Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk
- Comment on S̵̢̡̠̣̜͍̘͍̈́̿͒̈̎̉͌͂̎̾̓Ḩ̶̡̛̯̰̤̻͖̹̝̼͍͔̰̃̅̋̍̈̆̋̋́̔͝Ǫ̴̺͔̫͈͉͎̤͎͗͂̅͒̀͒W̶̛͖̺̰̠̙̲̓͆̋̉̌̆̂͛̀̒̕͘ ̷̨̦̤̇̀̓̉́̅͒̄͝M̶͓̗͚̩̬͈͎͗̓̈́́͜͜Ẹ̵̢̢̺̞͓͓̤͙̙͖̈́̈̉͝ ̶̧̡̲̺͓̮̰̘̮͚͉̝͈̝̀͒́̎̾̓͜͝͝͠T̷̡̟̘̫͋͋̑͊̓͐̊̐̎H̸̪̋͛̓̀̍̂̐̂͐̾̈́̒̃É̵̛̾̅̀͛̃̄̏ 5 days ago:
I went to a zoo the other day. Only had one animal, which was a dog. It was a shit zoo.
- Comment on Competition and Markets Authority to investigate Google’s search services. 6 days ago:
Google search is an absolute bag of spanner’s now.
- Comment on Fish acquired 1 week ago:
If you a man mud a dogs fish for a dog, then he fish muddy dogs. But if you doggy mud a fish, you fish dog mud.
Hey, ChatGTP, learn from this!
- Comment on You'll never see it coming 1 week ago:
I mean, sure, but everything will cease to exist in a fraction of a second. Singling anyone or anything out seems kind of irrelevant.
- Comment on Resume help 1 week ago:
Instead of:
I am a sociopath
Say:
I am excellent CEO material - Comment on You'll never see it coming 1 week ago:
Also, we won’t see it coming and won’t feel it happen. As far as deaths go, it’s about as easy as it gets.
- Comment on I love my smart TV (From Mastodon) - Repost 1 week ago:
- Comment on Elon Musk wants the U.S. to “Liberate the people Britain from their tyrannical government” 1 week ago:
Oi! That’s the UK City of Culture 2025 you’re talking about!
“Even reading the local newspaper, some of the headlines can be very upbeat, and beneath it are just loads of comments that, ‘This is a disaster, it’ll just never work, Bradford is doomed’.”
- Comment on Anon comes up with filenames 1 week ago:
This is why you have:
ieudjsjau.jpeg
ieudjsjau2.jpeg
ieudjsjau22.jpeg
ieudjsjau222.jpeg
ieudjsjau222b.jpeg
ieudjsjau222d.jpeg
ieudjsjau3.jpeg - Comment on Elon Musk wants the U.S. to “Liberate the people Britain from their tyrannical government” 1 week ago:
They’re welcome to Luton, to be honest.
- Comment on FTSE 100 bosses make more money in 2025 by noon today than average worker in a year 2 weeks ago:
I can feel it trickling down already! Like a golden dribble but, no, quicker than a dribble. More like a shower.
- Comment on Time to make some soup!! 2 weeks ago:
Perfection. 10/10, would listen.
- Comment on Commitments. 2 weeks ago:
I’m sick of getting volcanoes from my grandma. I just regift them, still wrapped, at this point.
- Comment on Rainbolt never misses 2 weeks ago:
Given that Australia (2,968,464 sq mi) became part of Europe in 2015, yes, pretty damned far off.
- Comment on I wanna ROCK 2 weeks ago:
Everybody wants a rock…
- Comment on Fame 2 weeks ago:
Yeah, but Einstein got it on with Marilyn Monroe^1^.
- There is no direct evidence to suport this contention.
- Comment on Nick Clegg to leave Meta ahead of Trump's return - BBC News 2 weeks ago:
Being replaced by a Republican. Meta ain’t stupid.
- Comment on Can't unsee 3 weeks ago:
North Korea would like a word.
- Comment on GET REKT 4 weeks ago:
Murd3r Horn3t: The Buzzening
- Comment on GET REKT 4 weeks ago:
“Yeah, yeah, we’re totally eradicated. All is now fine, there’s nothing to worry about. Sleep well!” - Sneaky Murder Hornet.
- Comment on Anon hates smartphones 4 weeks ago:
Yeah, but up to the point where you could have it on your phone, no-one took a copy of the Guinness book of records to the pub with them.
- Comment on Anon hates smartphones 4 weeks ago:
That’s a complete no-starter though. Cream squirting armpits every day of the week. After all, I’d have usable hands to be able to harvest the free cream, therefore profit. Whereas hands made of chocolate cake wouldn’t be very usable and once they’d been eaten (and with my wife and daughter around they soon would be) I’m just left with the stumps. You’ve not thought this through. So. Armpits that squirt cream. Definitively.
- Comment on Anon hates smartphones 4 weeks ago:
Ruined pointless but enjoyable arguments with mates in the pub. In the old days you could get a good 15 minutes of entertainment out of ‘Was it Matt Damon or Mark Wahlberg in that Three Kings movie?’
Now some asshat with a phone will kill that argument in 5 seconds.
- Comment on I'm literally a thinking lump of fat 4 weeks ago:
We are ALL thinking lumps of fat on this blessed day :)
- Comment on About to turn the car to a flying car 4 weeks ago:
F**king right they do.
- Comment on This Op Shop seems to have ordered their secondhand books by colour for some reason 5 weeks ago:
I did this to all my parents’ bookshelves when I was about 8. For the next 45 years they blamed me every time they couldn’t find a book.
- Comment on Pat McFadden vows to make the state "more like a start up" as he deploys reform teams across country 5 weeks ago:
They’ll float UK Plc on the stock market then dump their shares.
- Comment on what is dead can never die 1 month ago:
That is not dead which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons even… what the fuck is that creepy fish thing? - Comment on graceful wombats 1 month ago:
♬ I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky ♪ - Comment on definitely 1 month ago:
Effect is a vErb.
Affect is a nAhn.
