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how do you slice it??

⁨1040⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨fossilesque@mander.xyz⁩ to ⁨science_memes@mander.xyz⁩

https://mander.xyz/pictrs/image/2ad81df9-9754-4d35-bc70-3389be64a579.png

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Comments

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  • LillyPip@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Everyone who’s dealt with kids knows you have to bisect the giraffe equally from nose to tail so everyone gets 2 legs, or somebody will cry that it’s unfair.

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    • pfwood178@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Everyone who deals with scientists knows they assume a perfectly spherical, frictionless, giraffe.

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      • mushroommunk@lemmy.today ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        In a vacuum

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      • Daft_ish@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        I cant remember, what is the friction coefficient foe a giraffe?

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    • bulwark@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I let one cut and the other gets to pick first.

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      • zakobjoa@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        This is the way. And from experience, it will result in sub-nanometer size differences.

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    • Pudutr0n@feddit.cl ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Kids are total commies.

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    • marcos@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Make sure to get the same number of spots too.

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    • Part4@infosec.pub ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
      [deleted]
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      • jaybone@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        I think you mean Solomon.

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  • Catoblepas@piefed.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Even if you think height divided by two, why even describe it that way? Giraffes are tall, but not so unfathomably tall that something half its size is incomprehensible. That’s 7-9ish feet. You couldn’t say the size of Andre the Giant?

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    • Lumidaub@feddit.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      The Youth Today don’t know who that is. Then again, do they know how large a giraffe is? We may never know.

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      • logicbomb@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Then again, do they know how large a giraffe is?

        Just today, I learned a handy way of visualizing the size of a giraffe. If you took that asteroid that struck off the coast of Iceland, and made a copy of it and put the two of them together, that’s about the size of a giraffe.

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    • Okokimup@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Alex Horn wrote it.

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      • Catoblepas@piefed.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Sorry, I don’t get the reference and the Wikipedia page didn’t help!

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    • marcos@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      People usually measure asteroids by mass (but then, those people are already abnormal, so who knows?), if so, it’s something around the size of a cow.

      Or maybe they could use metric…

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      • cute_noker@feddit.dk ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        A big rock, maybe this is the appropriate time to use stone

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    • Nakoichi@hexbear.net ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Or just slice it long ways down the middle. Bilateral symmetry makes this pretty easy.

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  • Kirca@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    This is why real scientists use the only reasonable real world measurement - a perfectly spherical cow in a vacuum.

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    • TorJansen@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Hmm. Thought they used bananas.

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      • jaybone@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Maybe in a shop vac.

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  • satanmat@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Dear gods

    How far will these Americans go to not use the metric system… ffs

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    • ohulancutash@feddit.uk ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Sadly they’re not American

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    • ayyy@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Your bigotry has blinded you so much you couldn’t even see the two biggest, boldest words in the picture.

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      • satanmat@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Oh no; I saw it was the DM… I just assumed that the writer must have been American.

        You are SO correct, as I should have realized by the giraffe unit of measure.

        I’m at a loss as to the Venn diagram where giraffe and imperial would overlap…

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    • Semjaza@lemmynsfw.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Daily Mail are the sort who think adopting the metric system let all the foreigners into Britain and led to the downfall of empire. Probably in that order.

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  • nialv7@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    obviously the scientists meant a spherical giraffe in a vacuum

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    • Karjalan@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Personally I thought it was obvious that they were talking about the outer half

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  • seraphine@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    americans be using anything but the metric system

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    • kalpol@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Daily Mail is British

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      • LunarLoony@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        But they’re the sort of British that yearns for the good old days, when we still had shillings and inches and diphtheria and jumpers for goalposts and no womens’ rights and all that great British stuff.

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      • perviouslyiner@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        British people old enough to have supported the original nazis be using anything but the metric system

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    • the_crotch@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Its time to retire the metric system in favor of something base 12. Base 10 is for children who need to count on their fingers, base 12 is easier to divide into quarters or thirds. Babylon was right.

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    • buttnugget@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Americans be using metric all our lives.

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      • helpImTrappedOnline@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Yeah, we measure our soda in liters all the time, but only 2 liters. Other drink sizes are in ounces, and milk is in gallons and pints.

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    • Jumbie@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I was thinking this must be metric because only Europeans with their noses firmly in the air would get it.

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  • meme_historian@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    One standard volume giraffe of course, i.e. the volume in m³ an average giraffe would fill (at room temperature and sea level), when passed through a blender. And then half of that

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    • psycho_driver@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      The scientists had to go through many more proportionate animals before discovering that half a giraffe was a near perfect match for the size of the asteroid.

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      • meme_historian@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        As it turns out, the emergence and popularization of Zoos during the Victorian era was largely driven by the work conducted at the Royal Institute for Volumetric Measurements in London.

        Similarly the expansion of the British empire was mostly driven by the need to find ever larger exotic animals in order to establish comparative volumetric weights for the ever larger ships and constructions of that era.

        “25.678 standard volume foxes”, was becoming a bit unwieldy when describing a cargo vessels weight.

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      • DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Nah, there’s a list somewhere of typical weights, dimensions, volumes, etc. of common items. They just put in their value and it pops up. They’re nerds first, and scientists second. You KNOW this exists somewhere, and they all have it bookmarked.

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  • MourningDove@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I love it when I can understand your memes!

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    • fossilesque@mander.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Ask questions when you do not. :)

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      • MourningDove@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Oh I wouldn’t begin to know what to even ask. I’m a music major lol. But if I think of something, I’ll pipe up.

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  • passenger@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Reads Daily Mail clickbait, proceeds to blame “scientists”

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  • absentbird@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    So like the size of a horse?

    The average horse is about half the height and weight of the average giraffe. Giraffes are just a really bad unit of measurement, males weight about 400kg more than females and there is a wide height difference over their global population, they are technically four different species we just all call giraffe 🦒

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    • buttnugget@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I was just going to say, what kind of weird ass size comparison is that. It’s almost as egregious as saying “half the size of two apples”.

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      • Pat_Riot@lemmy.today ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        The Smurfs were 3 apples tall.

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  • TheSlad@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Also, most people dont even have a good grasp on how big giraffes are anyways!

    I once went to a zoo that had an elevated platform extending into the giraffe’s habitat so that you could stand face to face with them. Their heads are as big as a normal human, like 5 feet from crown to chin!

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    • TonyTonyChopper@mander.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      This is what Big Giraffe doesn’t want you to know Image

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      • vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Ah yes the Newfoundland garden giraffe, often times overlooked due to the Canadian House Hippo.

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  • territorial@slrpnk.net ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    In other words, a large boulder the size of a small boulder

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  • TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I don’t get why Americans are doing their best to avoid the metric system. It’s always weird discriptions. Like dishwashers, or in this case, half a giraffe. Just use bananas if (cubic) meters are too complex.

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    • morkyporky@suppo.fi ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Isn’t daily mail in the UK?

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      • TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        You mean wannabe US? (never truly accepted metric system, even discussed to change back to imperial)

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    • prettybunnys@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      People enjoy when things are compared in this way, it’s really not that shocking.

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      • TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Other people (me) hate it.

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      • bstix@feddit.dk ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        It’s more of a journalist thing. They take the words out of your mouth to reach their own conclusion fast and deliver an answer that’ll fit inside the allocated screen time.

        “When you heard that people use things instead of measurements to explain the size of other things, exactly how shocking was it to you?”

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    • lightnsfw@reddthat.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      It’s not like we don’t have imperial units to use. It’s just easier to visualize an object you’re familiar with than 20ft/6m or whatever other unit. Giraffes is a strange choice though.

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      • TigerAce@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Friends of mine are expecting a child. They have an app to compare the current size of the baby. It has the weirdest choices:

        • Wedding cake (they are always the same size? Depends on the budget right? So if you’re rich your child is bigger than when you’re poor, when it’s the wedding cake size?)
        • flat box of chocolates (always the same size? Flat child?)
        • small popcorn bucket
        • small pinguin (there are so many differently sized small pinguïns)
        • cotton candy (last one I had was huge, I feel sorry for the woman with a child that size in their womb)
        • maki
        • jackfruit
        • rhubarb (so it’s a stick shaped child?)
        • kitten (a grows the most as a kitten. They are kitten for the first year. It’s like saying the size of your baby is the size of a baby.)

        I have no clue what these sizes are exactly. I do know what 10cm or 20cm is.

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  • BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    And is it half the volume, mass or a dimension? Because I’ve never tried neither blending or carrying a giraffe before (I never got invited tonthose parties in uni) so I have no grasp on volume or mass.

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    • BillBurBaggins@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Surely a giraffe is nearly uniform density making the distinction between volume and mass irrelevant

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      • Canonical_Warlock@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Assume a spherical giraffe.

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      • Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Even if it is not if you are just looking at the toal volume or mass it makes no difference when you halve it.

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    • Natanael@infosec.pub ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Just the left half

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  • MrSulu@lemmy.ml ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    The Daily Mail readership will not fathom your question. It is a rag for those who would follow MAGA but want to appear intelligent without have either the natural talent or putting in any work to increase knowledge. Baseline racism is a requirement

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  • oyfrog@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    The anatomical answer is sagitally down the midline.

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  • ohulancutash@feddit.uk ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I’m surprised they didn’t use immigrants as the unit.

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  • Quibblekrust@thelemmy.club ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I once saw a snake half the size of a garden hose.

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  • BlushedPotatoPlayers@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    It’s not the scientists, it’s a single journalist who is popping out these headlines. Some of those caught attention.

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  • Bronstein_Tardigrade@lemmygrad.ml ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    They could have just used inanimate objects not requiring bisection; basketballs, refrigerators, cars, busses, buildings, etc. Why bring sn abattoir into the mix?

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  • EvilEdgelord@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    You divide the giraffe vertically down the center 🤦‍♂️

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    • SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Coronal or Sagittarius?

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  • Pulptastic@midwest.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Bilaterally as is the way.

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    • sem@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Probably along the primary axis

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  • kamen@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    The thing that’s bothering me is that they ended a question with a period. Why, random person on the Internet, why?

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  • HenriVolney@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    How much is it in bananas?

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  • supersquirrel@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Easy. Just imagine only the spots part.

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  • Jankatarch@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Halved with a vertical cut.

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  • 0x0@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    What’s with the spherical comments in a vacuum?

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  • 0x0@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Should’ve used bananas for scale.

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  • Agent641@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Bifurcated down between the eyes

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  • resipsaloquitur@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Laterally.

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