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Dutch toilets

⁨890⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨sjmarf@sh.itjust.works⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/05d1af84-81ff-49b8-8de1-c66802681aed.jpeg

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Comments

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  • ReallyActuallyFrankenstein@lemmynsfw.com ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I’m confused, isn’t this a better spot for the drain hole? When you sit facing the wall? So you have a shelf for your comic books and chocolate milk?

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    • flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Ah, touché

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    • Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      It looks like it’s designed to soak your balls. I’m not into this.

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    • aStonedSanta@lemm.ee ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      southparkshop.com/…/SB-NSFW-WO_Viacom_SouthPark_T…

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    • BruceTwarzen@lemm.ee ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      We had these here as well and i have no idea. The only thing i ever heard that made sense was it was easier to take stool samples. That makes some sense, but why would every household need them?

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    • Schmuppes@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Serious answer: The design had easy stool sample collection in mind.

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      • pigup@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        I’ve blastes this all over Reddit back in the day and now I’ll blast it here: HOW OFTEN ARE THE DUTCH COLLECTING THEIR STOOLS THAT THEY NEED THIS KIND OF TOILET IN EVERY HOUSEHOLD? THEY USE IT EVERY DAY AND NOT JUST AT A DOCTOR’S OFFICE OR A HOSPITAL WHERE YOU WOULD THINK THAT STOOL SAMPLES WOULD BE COLLECTED OFTEN.

        To this day no one has ever given me a reasonable believable explanation that makes sense. I’d be happy to hear that “all the greedy corporate toilet makers didn’t want to change their design to save money and now we’re all stuck with this dumb toilet blah blah blah” or “we Dutch folk have a special device to sit on that you don’t see in this picture that makes the design of this toilet sensible” or even “we simply love looking at a big stinky pile of s*** every time we take a dump you wouldn’t understand we’re Dutch”

        I stayed in hotels and motels in the Netherlands and they all had the stupid toilet and it stanks so bad and they don’t believe in ventilated bathroom so you just have to open a window and smell it and your wife and kids have to smell it too. it’s so dumb.

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  • AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Apparently this design was popular in Germany a hundred years or so ago. Its key advantage was allowing the user to examine their stools for signs of digestive health problems.

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    • squid_slime@lemm.ee ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      its so annoying having to use tongs :/

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      • altima_neo@lemmy.zip ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        You don’t have a knife?

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    • Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      We Germans like to take pride in our workmanship.

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      • Slovene@feddit.nl ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        *workmanshit

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    • Agent641@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      I dont need to examine my stools to know my digestive heath is horrific.

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    • MasterNerd@lemm.ee ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      I thought it would just be for less splashing

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      • dubyakay@lemmy.ca ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        It’s definitely for less splashing. I hate the North American bowls that spray your ass when your turd dunks.

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    • alvvayson@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Yep, but nowadays they are losing popularity. I don’t even know if you can still find them.

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    • TwoBeeSan@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Explains shit fetish or vice versa?

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  • Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Story time: I once briefly lived in a place that had an old toilet bowl like this. You can still find them in older houses. One day I took a massive shit and then dived it that the flash wasn’t seeing enough to get it down from there. And there wasn’t a brush. Yikes. Just wanted to share that with you guys.

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    • Spezi@feddit.org ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      The trick is to put 3 pieces of toilet paper in beforehand, that way the whole shitboat can float away.

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      • evergreen@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        I like to imagine the shitboat floating away in flames like an epic Viking burial.

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      • pineapplelover@lemm.ee ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Actually? Or are you joking?

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      • Pringles@lemm.ee ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        My shits at my grandma would’ve been more comfy had I known this. I was always worried it wouldn’t flush (which happened on occasion).

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    • someguy3@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Did you use the poop knife?

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      • absGeekNZ@lemmy.nz ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        I came here to reference this, great work.

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    • valkyre09@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Origami toilet brush made from toilet paper. Yikes

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    • Linnce@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      So what did you do next? I’m thoroughly invested in the story

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      • Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Got a bucket of water to flush it. After that I always had the bucket ready before starting the business. Luckily I didn’t stay there very long.

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    • hOrni@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      You wrap Your hand in toilet paper and give it a little push. That’s what toilet paper is for.

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  • Nuke_the_whales@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    So your shit just piles up on the upper part till it kisses your asshole?

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    • user224@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      I have some experience with these. The only problem is that as the vertically standing excrement begins to collapse forwards, there is a chace for it to keep contact and drag its top portion across, from your anus towards the front. You can avoid this with a maneuver, pulling yourself up and slightly forward, right after the singular vertical log begins losing contact with the excretion area.

      This is not a joke

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      • AnomalousBit@programming.dev ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Give this person an honorary degree in Turd Dynamics. Have you considered publishing your findings in the journal Nature?

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      • doingthestuff@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        I haven’t had a nice log come out in decades. Enjoy them while you can.

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      • Siegfried@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Haven’t you thought of shitting backwards?

        I prefer the kiss of poseidon over the casualities of deforestation

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      • SynopsisTantilize@lemm.ee ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        It’s trying to touch your balls isn’t it…?

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    • TheRisingApe@lemmynsfw.com ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      We referred to it as the poop shelf on our last visit.

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      • apfelwoiSchoppen@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Decades ago we called this the poop shelf as well.

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      • ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        My brother and I called it the inspection shelf as a joke. Turns out that’s what it’s actually for.

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    • bitwaba@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      The real problem is your turds are exposed to open air the whole time, so the smell fucking awful the whole time.

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    • hakunawazo@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      It’s a solid way to prevent neptunes kiss.

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      • Death_Equity@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        The downside is getting your balls slapped with a turd.

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    • sxan@midwest.social ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Um… if you’re holding on to that much shit, you may want you see a doctor.

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      • Frozengyro@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        You’ve clearly never seen an American eat. 3 triple burgers, a large fry, and a milkshake is the standard dinner while dieting.

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    • Simulation6@sopuli.xyz ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      It gives you the opportunity to examine it. I think that is the reason for the design.

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      • floofloof@lemmy.ca ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        And to savour the undiluted aroma.

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      • Nuke_the_whales@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        “hey Sharon, SHARON GET IN HERE YOU GOTTA SEE THIS! SHARON!”

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    • veganpizza69@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      It kisses goodbye your asshole. Don’t forget from whence thy sheit falls.

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    • zero_spelled_with_an_ecks@programming.dev ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Since it’s already coming out, is it a French/Australian kiss?

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  • walter_wiggles@lemmy.nz ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Yeah but where’s your poop knife?

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    • Cuzscience@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      That’s what the three shells are for.

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      • Transporter_Room_3@startrek.website ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Pfffffffff he doesn’t know how the three shells work!

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      • Pantsofmagic@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        I’m still trying to understand which of the three shells is the correct one to use as a poop knife

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    • AuntieFreeze@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      The mashitty?

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    • hoch@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      ah, je mean de poop clogs?

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      • jedibob5@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        It sure does.

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    • aquinteros@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      aaah I get this reference

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    • I_Miss_Daniel@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Just use a shit stirrer.

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  • lgmjon64@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I had these in a few houses in Germany. I call them trophy shelf toilets.

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    • bricklove@midwest.social ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

      Did you have the light switch outside the bathroom too? That way your friends can make you poop in the dark

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      • SpaceCadet@feddit.nl ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Still better than a light sensor in a communal bathroom… outside of the stalls. That’s how it is at my workplace. If I spend a bit too long pooping, and nobody else comes in to poop at the same time, I end up in the dark. Then when I have to wipe, I have to either risk opening the stall door and wave into the room, with my dirty ass hanging out, hoping nobody happens to enter the bathroom at that time, or wait patiently for someone to come in and reactivate the light. Makes me wonder how blind people check their wiping: do they go on flavor or smell?

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      • BluesF@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Oh, is that not a thing some places? I think the majority are outside here in the UK, generally electricals are not allowed inside the bathroom (although I’m not sure this actually covers light switches as I’m sure some of them are in there…)

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      • Raiderkev@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Lol I’m in the states, but one of my friends houses had this “feature” growing up. I definitely turned the light off on him a few times. To top it off, this bathroom had no windows so it got fucking dark in there. It wouldn’t even work today, everyone has phones w them now n would just use that after you turned it off. Kids these days…

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      • lgmjon64@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

        Of course.

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  • UmeU@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Image

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  • MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Image

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  • ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    American toilets gave me culture shock

    They’re so shallow that you can’t even sit down without your junk touching the bowl or the water

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  • samus12345@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    They had these in Germany, too. If you took a particularly massive shit sometimes the water pressure wasn’t enough to shove it into the hole.

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  • LordWiggle@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Those are actually French toilets. They were designed like this so you can check for blood and other abnormalities. British toilets were designed so the poop would fall in the water, reducing the stench. The British design proved more popular, yet the French design is better with less splashing and for checking. It’s important to check, to find out if there’s something wrong with your intestines like cancer (black blood) or a tapeworm. The British didn’t find this important, just like washing hands after pooping.

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  • baggachipz@sh.itjust.works ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    You should see the Dutch Oven….

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  • bitchkat@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    The poop shelf makes it easier to use the poop knife.

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  • JimVanDeventer@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Pedophiles in the olympics, our strange toilets with the “poop shelf”; I just can’t win today.

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  • Phoenix3875@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Comments on toilets from France, England, and Germany by Slaboj Zizek: youtube.com/watch?v=8mtZmBvat4k

    Another good bit (not in the video) is that Zizek thinks that’s why Germans can endure great pain and sacrifices for an ideal…if you are strong enough to observe your shit for health reasons, there’s nothing you can’t do!

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  • PenisDuckCuck9001@lemmynsfw.com ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    What if I don’t want to observe my turd on an elevated toilet pedestal though?

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  • Nikls94@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    It’s so you can examine your stool, you might have some blood or a consistency you don’t like, that way you see it

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  • unexposedhazard@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I know the meme is that people use it to look at the poop, but honestly the main advantage is the 0% chance of water splashing up. I will take this design over the “standard” ones any day.

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  • Gaassporks@feddit.nl ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    I’m a bit shocked with reactions I read. You’ve probably never heard of figure shitting. I tried to figure shit some letters of the alphabet. I’m great at the letter P and R.

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  • polumrak@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    How do you inspect your stool for blood, then?

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  • AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    In hungary too in some older toilets. Tbh its better because of less splash.

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  • werefreeatlast@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Finally, the hole is in the right side! Now my 12" penis feels right at home!

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  • Fedizen@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    literal take on shitposting

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  • SonicBlue03@sh.itjust.works ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    This is how you go Dutch.

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  • Jumpingspiderman@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    German toilets are like that too.

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  • Xatolos@reddthat.com ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Meanwhile in Italy

    Italian toilet

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  • uis@lemm.ee ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Poop and scoop

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  • set_secret@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Usa drops kids off at pool, the dutch stack shelves.

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  • suction@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    Strange hills Americans choose to die on for 500, Alex

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  • nul42@lemmy.ca ⁨8⁩ ⁨months⁩ ago

    This post helps me understand Zizek on ideology and toilets.

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