You know this bed is great and all, but what it’s really missing is a mandatory connection to the Internet!
…jfc
AWS crash causes $2,000 Smart Beds to overheat and get stuck upright
Submitted 15 hours ago by cm0002@lemmings.world to technology@lemmy.zip
Comments
Asafum@feddit.nl 14 hours ago
Gullible@sh.itjust.works 14 hours ago
“Carla! Carla! What the fuck is this? I know you sleep on a 25. A 25 or a 30 if you fuck up swiping. I know for a fucking fact that you would NEVER choose to sleep on a 60, and yet I found a goddamn record of a 60 when I was out last week. Who was it? Who was here?”
I really can’t see any other reason. A dial isn’t sexy but it’s far easier in every way
Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 1 hour ago
What a stupid fucking product.
Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works 1 hour ago
Sorry, I meant to say “stupid fucking people buying stupid fucking products.”
LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 1 hour ago
Beds are often used for fucking. Beds are fucking products.
ImgurRefugee114@reddthat.com 2 hours ago
Dumbest fucking timeline
matlag@sh.itjust.works 6 hours ago
Reminds me that nurse interview in Spain during the blackout:
“But your hospital doesn’t have a backup generator?? -Oh we have solar panels, we could be running off the grid! But the power management system requires an Internet connection, and it’s down!”
DaddleDew@lemmy.world 14 hours ago
People in the 80’s: “In the year 2025 we’re going to have hoverboards and flying cars!”
2025: “I can’t use my bed because the servers are down”
Never buy anything that needs to be connected to a server to work for no good reason.
undefinedTruth@lemmy.zip 13 hours ago
Smart products themselves are not the issue. The issue is making everything cloud based. The solution is companies designing their products so they can be controlled over the network.
It’s a fucking bed! It doesn’t need a persistent connection to some server. The problem is that they also want to mine and sell your data.
MrTolkinghoen@lemmy.zip 12 hours ago
That’s the key. They want to mine and sell the data
SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 11 hours ago
Smart products are named oxymoronically.
Albbi@lemmy.ca 11 hours ago
Also people in the 80’s: “I love my waterbed, but my back is killing me for some reason.”
AppleTea@lemmy.zip 4 hours ago
I feel like if I was gonna put a computer attached to a motor & heater inside a bed, the very first step would be making sure that if the software goes wrong, it always defaults to staying bed shaped and not catching fire.
I know I know hindsight is 20/20, I’m sure I’m just missing something. Venture capitalists would just give their money to any random idiot with a pitch, right?
hperrin@lemmy.ca 8 hours ago
Not that it isn’t wildly ridiculous and stupid to have an internet connected bed, but couldn’t you just unplug it if it’s overheating?
matlag@sh.itjust.works 6 hours ago
That’s what customer support would have told the poor clueless customers if the hotline had not been an AI agent running on AWS!
mikedd@lemmy.world 5 hours ago
Damn, that’s bleak…
CameronDev@programming.dev 7 hours ago
Dont blame the victim, those poor people couldn’t sleep, as if they could critically think /s
Pulptastic@midwest.social 7 hours ago
But then it’s not a smart beer, is it Todd?
rafoix@lemmy.zip 15 hours ago
lol, e-waste beds.
CompactFlax@discuss.tchncs.de 14 hours ago
I’ve heard these beds are actually quite effective at helping you sleep and then wake up more naturally.
But they have wrapped entirely local events (it’s all just timers, folks) behind a cloud-exclusive subscription and the product is useless on a sunny day like we had yesterday.
They’re enormously expensive and the subscription serves no useful purpose other than to line the pockets of the investors.
I have a strict rule of no cloud dependency in my house. Otherwise, I’d be interested - if the price was remotely reasonable.
HejMedDig@feddit.dk 14 hours ago
You can get other versions than eight sleep. I had an insert for my pillow. Can’t remember the brand though. It ran locally via an app and Bluetooth. I ended up returning within the trial period, due to it forming bubbles in the circulation, which woke me up
floofloof@lemmy.ca 12 hours ago
I just hammer my brain with melatonin on top of alcohol and extreme fatigue. It’s nature’s solution.
tyler@programming.dev 14 hours ago
You can flash your own firmware if you want.
partial_accumen@lemmy.world 12 hours ago
rozodru@pie.andmc.ca 13 hours ago
“sorry honey just a bit longer, I’m in the process of flashing the bed, we can go to bed soon…god damn sig faults!”
grahamja@reddthat.com 5 hours ago
That sounds wonderful, to have an air gapped smart bed on open source software. Just like having the perfect nuclear missile launch system on Windows XP made by clever engineers. No updates, just dreams.
CompactFlax@discuss.tchncs.de 13 hours ago
I wonder how it compares in functionality - to be clear, there’s no functionality I’m aware of that would require cloud (perhaps historical data).
Still, they’re wildly expensive.
mikedd@lemmy.world 5 hours ago
What’s wrong with just a regular mattress? Why does it have to be connected to the internet? :(
boonhet@sopuli.xyz 2 hours ago
It adjusts temperature (can heat OR cool and in some versions it can heat one side and cool the other) and I think the even more expensive version can morph a bit to your liking, and according to them, reduce snoring.
What they don’t mention is that regardless of whether you get the 3600 euro option or the 5800 euro option, you still have to SUPPLY YOUR OWN MATTRESS. It’s also a subscription service.
If you didn’t hate it enough, it’s also advertised as being “powered by AI”. Which almost certainly is just some temperature adjustment algorithm, maybe even a deterministic one.
gerowen@lemmy.world 5 hours ago
People who buy an internet connected bed have more dollars than sense.
JimVanDeventer@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
I thought I was terminally online but this is the moment I am hearing about smart beds. I guess the appeal is that it beams ads directly into your dreams?
CCMan1701A@startrek.website 7 hours ago
Waiting for the reports that cars couldn’t be used because of the aws issue
quick_snail@feddit.nl 9 hours ago
Of course someone made a bed whose controls require an API with internet access…
StrawberryPigtails@lemmy.sdf.org 15 hours ago
So, what would be the community that is the opposite of buy it for life?
Seriously, I get that internet is ubiquitous in some areas, but everything should have the ability to function correctly without internet access.
HootinNHollerin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 14 hours ago
ElectroLisa@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 hours ago
there was also one called “internetofshit” but forgot on which instance
TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
I am more shocked that there are people who are interested in “smart” furnitures and appliance.
4am@lemmy.zip 10 hours ago
Smart devices are fine - it usually just means remote control or status. Plenty of use in that.
The problem is that no one can be arsed to buy a local hub and figure out how to connect it, so every company just builds an app and makes it cloud connected. That way they can farm your stupidity.
It’s not hard to make a device that works locally (it’s way easier than making a cloud service) but it’s far less lucrative.
That being said if I bought a $2000 mattress cover and it didn’t work offline I’d have gotten my fucking money back.
DancingBear@midwest.social 9 hours ago
This is completely ridiculous. Why would you buy a bed that goes upright? Through the internet?
BigDanishGuy@sh.itjust.works 6 hours ago
Because, and this may surprise you, some (most?) people don’t think about how their stuff works. They just see it has an app and goes “neat!”.
I don’t know why my dishwasher should be online. But I’ve been with people who’s smart watches twinkled to alert them that their dishwasher, located 30min away, was out of rinse aid. I no scenario is that relevant. Rant warning There’s a God damn light on the front of the unit, that tells you the same damn thing, and you can’t do anything about without being at the unit. What are you going to do? Drop whatever you’re doing at work and take an hour lunch break early to drive home and deal with it? Didn’t think so.
BUT the person had seen the dishwasher and thought it was neat, modern, and needed a new dishwasher. And that’s whywe end up with a lot of “smart” devices, which are just “ordinary devices with an cloud based remote control”
slaacaa@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
Same people who are dropping their jaw when their car has a big-ass tablet in the middle of the dashboard instead of physical buttons.
You have to find the controls for windshield wiper’s speed 3 submenus deep, but it looks so modern and cool!
Buckshot@programming.dev 4 hours ago
Bought a new dryer recently and ended paying more for one that didn’t have internet connectivity. It’s entire operation requires physical presence, why would i need ever need remote access. It’s just something else to go wrong.
DancingBear@midwest.social 6 hours ago
Nah bruh, if my dishwasher ever sends me a text message, I am taking the rest of the day off just because, and my boss would understand
Jarix@lemmy.world 5 hours ago
Or maybe just go and get some more rinse aid in the way home… You don’t need to jump to rediculous conclusions.
SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 hours ago
I have awful acid reflux and have an adjustable bed frame. Having the top half slightly raised is a life saver since I can raise it for worse reflux and lower it for better sleep. I just use a remote, though. Doing it on an app through the internet is just stupid.
mikedd@lemmy.world 5 hours ago
After reading the post and sifting through the comments I had this realization, that’s probably more about advertising than anything else, I guess, but… Don’t you find it strange that in the last few years, there’s a non-zero number of people who stumble upon an article like this, on lemmy, out of all places, and think “I didn’t even know that existed, yet, it’s very obvious that enough people use it for it to make headlines”? Is it just me? 🤔
Marshezezz@lemmy.blahaj.zone 12 hours ago
Look at how much capitalism creates progress and drives us as a species to better ourselves. Next step, how to make money off people breathing air and sell them a subscription for it so they can continue to consume
MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net 11 hours ago
ngdev@lemmy.zip 10 hours ago
thats easy, pollute the air so much that you have to buy consumable gas mask filters to breathe
Marshezezz@lemmy.blahaj.zone 10 hours ago
Exactly what I was thinking. Petroleum companies have been working on it for years I’m sure
muffedtrims@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
Nestle enters the chat
possiblylinux127@lemmy.zip 11 hours ago
“Water isn’t a human right”
matlag@sh.itjust.works 6 hours ago
Then tens of thousands or millions would die when a server goes down, but “shit happens” and there was a small line in the EULA where the provider deny all responsability if anythind bad happens from a service failure.
Thoughts and prayers, though!
Did you know that with our Super+ package, you get redundant servers switching automatically to the next working one?
BroBot9000@lemmy.world 14 hours ago
SaveTheTuaHawk@lemmy.ca 11 hours ago
How about a Kohler toilet that watches you poop for an annual subscription.
quick_snail@feddit.nl 9 hours ago
Probably people with “help, my possessed bed folded me inside it, and now I’m trapped” fetishes
DarkSurferZA@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
I am torn between 1) people aren’t smart and 2) smart appliances aren’t smart.
Also, if you’re having an issue with your smart appliances, just open copilot and get the AI to connect you to the other virtual ai assistant for your product which is hopefully not running in AWS which will just ask if you need to talk to a human who doesn’t have a solution for “AWS is down and you bought an internet connected bed my dude”
#internetofshit #thisrantaintover
undefinedTruth@lemmy.zip 14 hours ago
There is special category for Internet of Shit devices, that not only are cloud based but also require a persistent connection to a server to even execute basic functions.
nucleative@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
We’re about to go through about 10 years of vibe coded garbage aren’t we.
plyth@feddit.org 1 hour ago
2, don’t forget the nuclear war.
the_q@lemmy.zip 14 hours ago
Lol wow. We truly are fucked as a species.
miguel@fedia.io 14 hours ago
The most first world of all first world problems has arrived
Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works 13 hours ago
Yeah you might as well “work overnight to fix this,” because you can’t go to bed anyway
shalafi@lemmy.world 13 hours ago
Smart devices are just dandy when they don’t require an internet connection. Got a cheapo smart thermostat that works no matter what. Google could cancel my Minis and my internet could go offline, I can still control it with buttons.
Bought that 5-years ago. At this point I assume all IoT devices require internet.
ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online 5 hours ago
smart BEDS? Look, I got a bed that has a removal part that has USB chargers, that is all I need… What the FUCK do I need a bed with an internet connection?
Abrinoxus@lemmy.today 13 hours ago
L.O.L! Cant wait to the next solarflare hope they swat the sleepers like flies
aeternum@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 hour ago
I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. But why does a bed need to be smart? This is the dumbest timeline ever. It really is