LemmyKnowsBest

@LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Realism⁩ ⁨⁨18⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago⁩:

  just tastes like plastic to me now.

  You’re supposed to remove the wax coating before devouring the cheese.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Even if you develop the worst type of dementia imaginable, please find a way to always remember the events of 11/13/25.⁩ ⁨⁨29⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago⁩:

  Oh your description ruined the illusion for me! I honestly thought it was a cat resting his chin on top of a flat pole (which looks like cat deep-throating the pole) but now I can see the mushroom top of the pole, and the cat is merely standing behind it 🫤

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨The amazing and innovative iphone pocket sold out⁩ ⁨⁨48⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago⁩:

  It’s just a silicone tube, isn’t it?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Image of pig evolution where pig starts to walk on 2 legs⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩:

  Does tesrerday come before or after tomorrow?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I used to always insert something inappropriate to the Nativity scene and my parents never noticed⁩ ⁨⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩:

  Shhh… Christmas is a white people’s holiday. Because Santa Claus needs rosy pink cheeks.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Christmas goatseings⁩ ⁨⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩:

  Badly-drawn-phalanges

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Female tourist takes down phone-snatcher in Argentina⁩ ⁨⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩:

  So much better than the judicial system which would have taken years to decide who was right and who was wrong.

  Let judgment be Swift and decisive. (Oh f*** why did my phone voice to text decide to capitalize swift. I’m not talking about a blonde pop star for God’s sake. And why didn’t it capitalize it the second time?)

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Is it gay to have pleasurable sex with your wife?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  I hate to play the devil’s advocate here, especially since I believe that all MAGAs are douchebags, but his stupid statement could also be interpreted a different way, like maybe he meant that he impregnates his wife every time he gives her an orgasm.So, like, once a year, tops.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Is it gay to have pleasurable sex with your wife?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  Religion & being a housewife with no financial leverage to escape.

  Until I fixed all that. Now he’s been my EX-husband for 14 years.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Is it gay to have pleasurable sex with your wife?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  I had a husband like that once. Three babies but never an orgasm.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨🔥🔥🔥⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  “I don’t find it funny because I’m homophobic”

  LOL I guess I should read the rest of your sentence before thinking I have the whole story.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨We've got it all worked out⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  I prefer not to reference deceased scientists & philosophers because it makes me appear old. I prefer to only acknowledge the wisdom of contemporaries such as Jordan Peterson & Neil DeGrass Tyson so people don’t think I’m elderly.

  /s

  (This is how I feel when kids say they’re embarrassed about liking 80s music)

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Pure contentment⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  Let girl shave fun

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Hilary can't catch a break⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Yeah, if their light-hearted banter includes things like “sent via tin can & string,” I’d tend not to take any of this too seriously 😂

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Hilary can't catch a break⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Yeah, if their light-hearted banter includes things like “sent via tin can & string,” I’d tend not to take any of this too seriously 😂

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Hotard⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Gotta love all our DEI pilots up there.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Hotard⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Thank you for this. I would feel so offended if I was a mentally challenged sex worker and people were calling me a hot tard.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Bank Workers, Rejoice!⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Sadly I’m afraid you are correct, that’s exactly what’s playing out. They’re squeezing everyone into becoming renters. We will own nothing and be h̶a̶p̶p̶y̶ vengeful.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨PLEASE BE CONSIDERATE⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  ##CATS SHOULD NOT HAVE DRIVER’S LICENSES##

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨⁩ ⁨⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Juicy vagina keeps you running?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨⁩ ⁨⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  I finally went to the doctor after decades of crippling shoulder & back pain. I know how to rehabilitate it myself, but what the world won’t give me is TIME & MONEY to rehabilitate so I’m taking the official -medical-records-and-doctor’s-orders route so the government & IRS & whoever the fuck is holding me as a slave to capitalism …will grant me time & resources for physical therapy & stop buckling under this pain.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Bank Workers, Rejoice!⁩ ⁨⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  So why do houses exist if nobody can have one?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨You are not prepared⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  It’s not the x= sh that bothers me. It’s the “lotl” = “too” that makes no sense.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨A hypothesis⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  “discluded”

  🤣

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨You are not prepared⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I do prefer pronouncing axolotl phonetically to rhyme with Aristotle.

  But I guess this kinda makes me curious about the Nahuatl language, why would they use the roman alphabet if they’re just gonna change the pronunciation of every letter into some unrelated nonsense 😵‍💫

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨You are not prepared⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Yeah but the guy in that YouTube tutorial seemed like he was implying that everybody should pronounce it correctly according to its language origin 🤷🏼‍♀️

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨When kids come trick-or-treating, what happens if I choose trick?⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  It’s not the kids who choose. They say “trick or treat” because if you don’t give them a treat, they will trick you. By vandalizing your house. That’s the tradition.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨card game shop⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  don’t get why some people have a problem with that.

  I have bipolar disorder. I see doctors for this. Saturday October 25th I took a shower and I went to work. Next day I went to work too. That night I drove 2 hours to prepare for an athletic event on Monday morning. I did the athletic event which took all day and then I went to bed. I was in bed from Tuesday to Friday. Friday morning I finally took a shower again.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Michael⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Ok then mental sports need to have their own separate Olympics.

  Because Olympics originated as a competitive showcase of the world’s peak physical prowess.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I Ate: Burrito. Am I happy now?⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  My only problem is that I’m obsessed with health & fitness.

  I choose not to adapt to a sick obese society.

  And if that makes me an outlier and you think I need to be medicated in order to conform to all the fat slobs in the world,

  Then let’s just please never meet. I’m frolicking at a nude beach right now and you probably wouldn’t feel comfortable here.