Gullible
@Gullible@sh.itjust.works
- Comment on get sum 20 hours ago:
You live in a world where people are slightly less stupid than they are. Frankly, I’d delete this comment if I were you. Someone will elucidate you shortly, and the world will grow darker.
- Comment on get sum 21 hours ago:
(I know, I’m being intentionally obtuse to further your joke and make fun of Mormons)
- Comment on SNAIL PRO TIPS 22 hours ago:
They’re pretty easy to get rid of, or at least cull. Leave some beer out and they’ll all drown in it. Snails adore beer.
- Comment on get sum 22 hours ago:
Uhh, I’m not sure you’re familiar with what sex is, if that’s your definition. After all, your description includes soaking, and those Mormon teens assured me that neither god nor the government would mind.
- Comment on Anon thinks about elephants 3 days ago:
The rhinoceros beetle says “check this slab of HOT bug SEX sitting before you upon a stick. My stick. No one else may perch upon my throne, my lair, my kingdom, lest they be smote upon the ground like so much errant detritus. I am a fucking god.” Sex appeal is weird across the animal kingdom.
- Comment on Now that I've got my conclusion, it's time to go look for evidence that only supports said conclusion! 3 days ago:
I dunno, I’d give it the benefit of the doubt. It might just be an incredibly niche topic, like the prognosis of early onset schizophrenia in adopted women of color.
- Comment on bug jobs 3 days ago:
Every hug has a job! Fruit flies consume the yeast on rotting fruit and their larvae consume the fruit itself, broadening the distribution of plant matter. Dragonflies voraciously consume all flying insects, but particularly slow flying ones like mosquitos, while their nymphs do the same in the water, controlling populations to avoid collapse. Scorpions sit inside your shoes and sting you to remind you to check your shoe for scorpions.
- Comment on Anon breaks up 4 days ago:
Anon hired a decent lawyer who argued that the seizure was frivolous and antagonistic. The court agreed, but by the time his guns were released, they had all converted to Islam, Christianity, Hinduism, and Linux.
- Comment on I 🖤 LaTeX 5 days ago:
Anyone else have any good latex quotes? Here’s mine:
“I don’t mean to brag, but I’m deathly allergic to latex.”
- Comment on Must be lvl 11 genius 1 week ago:
Pls respond
- Comment on advertisement 1 week ago:
- Comment on Anon is Illiterate 1 week ago:
Ancient Egyptians be like:
- Comment on Anon is Illiterate 1 week ago:
He is an obese man in the gym. Literally nothing more admirable than someone improving themselves.
- Comment on North Korea and South Korea isn't working. Let's try West Korea and East Korea instead. 1 week ago:
Nah, anterior and posterior Korea. Let the undercity commence. Rock and stone, baby
- Comment on Please tell me 1 week ago:
“Made by combining Ganges river water, Mexican tap water, and samples directly from the Fukushima reactor, Liquid Death won’t just slake your thirst, it will slay it for the rest of your life.”
- Comment on He's camera shy 1 week ago:
None, really. Started devouring every morsel of information I could a bit over a decade ago, until it turned into less than a trickle in April, and then I quit. Then April sprang back the year after, I remembered my compulsion, and I checked for more information again, until there was nothing left. And then it turned into a tradition for me.
- Comment on He's camera shy 1 week ago:
This is as good a time as any to recommend downloading a copy of Wikipedia! And if you already have your copy, please seed afterward!
- Comment on He's camera shy 1 week ago:
Every year in April, I used to check whether someone had uploaded a new video of a giant squid. I was always so excited! When I was growing up, these things were mythologized nearly to the same degree as unicorns or dragons, so seeing them, even in tatters and bobbing across the surface of the water like a mess of smelly pool noodles, was a nearly religious experience.
I quit this year because AI videos are all that I can find. I don’t need chopped up videos of giant squids stating that they’re “colossal squids” in uncanny AI cadence written by an AI and edited by an AI. I don’t need AI-produced replications of giant squids swimming or melting. I just want to find out whether any more scientific expeditions have filmed a creature I used to consider a legend.
We live in an era beyond objective, filmable truth, and that pisses me off.
- Comment on hubris go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr 1 week ago:
Extrapolation? You’re lucky to get a regular serving of polation. And that joke was worth the hundreds of billions of dollars invested in algorithms.
- Comment on It's always the same. 1 week ago:
Shame is unique to each bad boy, girl, or them. And some people relish it.
- Comment on Anon has nothing to do 1 week ago:
It’s 4chan. They assuredly developed some antisocial behaviors and some opinions on [a race, creed, skin color, political affiliation, sexual preference, nationality, incredibly niche video game that no one has heard of beyond the viscerally gut wrenching rape scene, etc.] that led them toward ignominy.
- Comment on [deleted] 1 week ago:
Damn, that’s a good friend. Very cute!
- Comment on Anon has a false alarm 1 week ago:
I haven’t, my farts are long. And loud. And they REEK.
- Comment on egg 1 week ago:
Hey, just wanted to apologize for getting you involved with an insane person. Wish you all the best.
- Comment on Anon cheers up his dad 1 week ago:
My inspiration! I truly believe that he’s at the forefront of instantly digestible horror and agony.
- Comment on Anon is an 80s villain 1 week ago:
(This might be a joke I’m not getting, but I think you might have meant rogue*)
- Comment on egg 1 week ago:
You did nothing wrong! And you did, for better or worse. I still had fun learning about lemmy’s perception of irony. Actually, I wanted to know whether you had some specific way of filtering out AI anatomical images? My top 200 images are all AI or unrelated and it makes me sad.
- Comment on Anon cheers up his dad 2 weeks ago:
The spray. The warm spray is what alerted me.
Have you ever witnessed what a hydraulic lift can do to a human torso? Your average stick of butter can only dream of understanding how cleanly a ribcage falls to such unyielding force.
At first, I reflexively sought refuge behind the car I was working on, but there was no need. I had no way of knowing this, but my friend’s chest had been crushed and sheared well beyond the center point. Ironically, he had been the only victim of arterial action, sprayed in his final moments. What struck me was the fluid from the severed hydraulic line.
After I had finished hyperventilating, the rest of the day was a blur. I could hardly manage to focus on the paperwork the police handed me or anything else, for that matter. How could I?
He and I had taught each other how to babble, learned how to walk side by side. We had cheated our way through school, partied, cared for each other when sick or feeble, built our lives on trusting one another. We had lived together longer than most families, truly loved one another as friends. And then he was meat taking up space in a bag.
I don’t know how I arrived home, but I remember my wife’s face as I stood in front of the door, keys in hand at my hip. She tenderly hugged me but I couldn’t help but recoil at the foreign pressure. I dragged myself through the door frame and slumped against the wall, finally landing upon something soft at my wife’s near imperceptible guidance.
She decided that I needed to remove myself from the situation, from my life. At least for a little while. Long enough to eat and breathe. My lungs felt as though they had been stuffed with cotton, and I was nearly ready to tear it out when she placed a bottle of whiskey at my hip and turned on the television across the room. To be outside myself was the greatest blessing I had ever been given.
My son walked into the room, chuckling to himself. I couldn’t help but light up a bit at his mirth and purity. He was everything right in the world, an unblemished angel sent to keep me from shattering. My vessel could take not a drop more, and he knew that.
He spoke some words made inaudible by the tv and the ringing in my ears, before dropping his shorts and expelling dripping feculence across the ground, and shrieking a laugh that felt like drills eating through my ears. The same tone that rang from my friend in his final moments.
I was broken.
- Comment on egg 2 weeks ago:
I think I’ll leave the snake jokes to you. That was really good
- Comment on egg 2 weeks ago:
I know you weren’t the original person, and yet you’re clearly upset. I can only assume it’s because you felt personally insulted.
I think I’ll continue playing the fool to middling success. Feel free to stay endlessly angry to achieve the same result.
