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Anon shares a family moment

⁨536⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨cm0002@piefed.world⁩ to ⁨greentext@sh.itjust.works⁩

https://lemmy.ml/pictrs/image/925d69dd-8bb2-4ffe-a547-6d30271c58b9.png

source

Comments

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  • craftrabbit@lemmy.zip ⁨55⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

    Call kesb

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  • MehBlah@lemmy.world ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Ask him what kind of nursing home he wants to be abandoned at.

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    • Fuck_u_spez_@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Y’all are way more generous and less petty than I’d be tempted to be.

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      • SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        A cardboard box can qualify as a nursing home as long as it’s staffed by enough care roaches.

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    • musubibreakfast@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      “Nursing home for gay ass removeds who weren’t accepting of their child’s sexuality.”

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  • bitwolf@sh.itjust.works ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Tell him it’s hereditary and that he must have the genes? Lol

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    • musubibreakfast@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Tell him this. Homosexuality can develop later in life if you’re not accepting of gay people. In an effort to protect you from gayness, your homofobic body will develop gay antibodies, in time these will alter your DNA by consuming your straight cells and turning you into a big ol’ gay. The only way to prevent this from happening is to be open and welcoming towards all gay people.

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      • DeathByBigSad@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        I sucked a guys’s dick to build immunity aginst gayness, did I do this right?

        (I’m kidding lol, I’m still virgin)

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    • El_guapazo@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      He got those good genes like that pants ad

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  • Zannsolo@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Just bide your time and wait for him to say that went by fast or time flies and hit him back with a hard f-word.

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  • AppleTea@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    call him a square

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    • stoy@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨hour⁩ ago

      I have heard that it is hip to be square, though I am not sure that it is cool to be hip these days

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      • Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world ⁨18⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

        Who among us ඞ can say what shape is best? We are all equally humbled by the unknowable geometry of cromulence. Topology is destiny, but Huey Lewis is old News.

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      • MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca ⁨43⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

        I’m pretty sure it’s still hip to be cool though.

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  • heyWhatsay@slrpnk.net ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Image

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  • some_guy@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Q: What does that say about dad watching fishing on tv rather than doing it for real on the water?

    A: The man has sucked every dick in town.

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  • halvar@lemy.lol ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    fake: anon has any relationship with his dad whatsoever

    gay: gay

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    • Whostosay@sh.itjust.works ⁨20⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Thank God those are separated incidents, otherwise this would be both fake and gay.

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  • diptchip@lemmy.world ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Honestly wouldn’t acknowledge his existence. A younger version of myself would refuse to believe this was a true story and that people are like that. Now, I’m wise enough to choose my battles. Some people just aren’t worth your time.

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  • EldenLord@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    People like Anon‘s dad are the reason why earth is still such a backward hillbilly place. Irrational disdain for harmless things like queerness, meanwhile actual problems and crimes like global warming, PFAS usage, genocide and corruption from top government officials.

    Fun fact: Humans are less socially intelligent than apes.

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    • DeathByBigSad@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      I’m from a family of immigrants, my parents complain about immigration.

      Bitch, WE ARE IMMIGRANTS 🤦‍♂️

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      • SoleInvictus@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Peak “fuck you, got mine”. Same with my grandparents. Grandpa was also notoriously racist. I laughed so hard when some genome sequencing revealed a ton of sub-Saharan genes in that side of the family. My dad was about 25% African and Grandpa was hella dark. Now how could that be…?

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      • ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        I have two half-Thai cousins (Floridians, naturally) whose mother was a Thai immigrant, and they love to bitch about immigrants (as does my white uncle, who brought this Thai immigrant to the US from Thailand). Neither looks Thai, but one looks generically Central American and the other looks Japanese and they got abused growing up for that. It’s really wild to me how this gave them no empathy at all for the shit immigrants have to endure; instead they do their best to be caricatures of white people.

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    • ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Just to have an ackshoolly moment: humans are apes. If you mean humans are less socially intelligent than gorillas, male gorillas tend to do stuff like killing all the children fathered by the previous silverback. Human stepfathers at least sometimes don’t do that.

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      • EldenLord@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        I meant apes as in great apes, but you‘re right, humans are included in the Hominidae superfamily. Gorillas almost only kill each other‘s children when the silverback dies and the group dissolves. Mostly because food becomes scarce then.

        Meanwhile I have seen human parents neglect their children and steal their allowance to try and win a rare Labubu doll. So yeah I‘d argue that as a species, the apes still got their shit together better than humans. (Except chimpanzees obv.)

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  • lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Honestly, I think his dad is just a giant abusive piece of shit, who would just use any excuse to beat the shit out of his son.

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    • Lauchmelder@feddit.org ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Interesting, I think this dad is completely imaginary, as is so often the case with greentexts

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      • tetris11@feddit.uk ⁨20⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Interesting, I think the father is an amalgamation of several real father responses summed into one

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    • RedC@sh.itjust.works ⁨20⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Hey, the jumper cables need to get some use

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  • 58008@lemmy.world ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Homophobe father deserves a Nobel Prize if his proposed sexuality-based time dilation is reproducible under lab conditions.

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    • Cheradenine@sh.itjust.works ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Can the world move to FST until drumph, poutine, and bibi are in hell? That would be sweet. We can change back after, or not, both are good.

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      • Etterra@discuss.online ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Warts will only come back unless you fix the root cause with the proper medical treatment. In this case, 9 out of 10 doctors recommend lead injection therapy.

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  • daggermoon@lemmy.world ⁨21⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    And his mom says nothing. Thanks for being a complicant piece of shit anon’s mom.

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    • Aneb@lemmy.world ⁨16⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      My mom went a step further and told me I would never be in a happy and fulfilling relationship if I choose to date men

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      • LH0ezVT@sh.itjust.works ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        I can only assume she spoke from experience

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  • Fourth@mander.xyz ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I wonder what he would say if you told him that it’s on him and must be in his blood too since he sired you.

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    • bitchkat@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      You think the dad doesn’t believe it’s a choice?

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      • yermaw@sh.itjust.works ⁨6⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Ive been called a homophonic idiot for saying this, but people who truly believe its a choice surely must be repressed bisexuals.

        Im completely hetero, I know its not a choice because I don’t have the choice to go gay. I would have done really well as a gay too, ive had so many more men hitting on me than women. If I was bisexual, I would have the option to “go gay”, and would have been able to make that choice.

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  • glorkon@lemmy.world ⁨16⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Get out of there as soon as you can. Always remember these moments. When your dad gets old and needs your help, tell him “only removeds need their sons to do stuff for them”.

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  • Chivera@lemmy.world ⁨19⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Just have sex with your dad already. Remove the sexual tension.

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    • slaacaa@lemmy.world ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Or at least a quick dadjob to help him release some tension

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      • Gullible@sh.itjust.works ⁨31⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

        “Uunh, I’m cumming!”

        “Hi, cumming. I’m dad.”

        *splurt*

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  • trk@aussie.zone ⁨21⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Time flies when you’re a faggot

    My sides

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    • doingthestuff@lemy.lol ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      I’m just confused what a bundle of sticks has to do with all of this.

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    • RaivoKulli@sopuli.xyz ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      It’s such a stupid and nonsensical insult that I just love it

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      • Lemminary@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        No way, man, I don’t know where my day went! Wait, does that mean… ?

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  • dharmacurious@slrpnk.net ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    The obvious answer is to invite over the biggest, burliest bear you can imagine, get him to befriend your dad and make your dad think you’ve finally made a “real man” friend, and then fuck the bear in the ass in front of dad. Assert dominance. Are you a faggot? Absolutely. Faggots can dominate the manliest of men.

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  • blackstampede@sh.itjust.works ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I haven’t been called a faggot before, but when I’ve been insulted in this sort of casual, out-of-nowhere way, I’ve found that responding with “go fuck yourself” in a calm tone of voice and then continuing my conversation to be effective.

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  • lobut@lemmy.ca ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    According to the right-wing, “oh what, you wanna outlaw comedy now? it’s just a joke you snowflake!”

    If you’re not offended by the father’s comments, just change the offending word to whatever you are. If you think nothing’s wrong with it, it could be worth learning why

    I got picked on a lot as a kid. What it did was make me hyper sensitive to other people’s insecurities. I would see you and think: weight, race, bad at school, has a crush on X. I’d memorize it and put it in my back pocket and just dig at someone when they’d take a shot at me. It was a horribly daunting way to live because you’re never really enjoying the moment.

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    • TexasDrunk@lemmy.world ⁨16⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      If it had been a joke the father could have said something like “Time flies when you’re a fairy”.

      I know that wasn’t your point, but your first line made me realize that. It’s still fucked up, but if you have a good relationship and know what the person is ok with that could absolutely be mistaken for a bad joke. Instead he just said something idiotic.

      I don’t participate (feels kind of gross), but I’ve seen people joke with each other using slurs about the other. But I’m not the language police I’m not going to tell people what they can and can’t say. But this wasn’t even something that could accidentally be mistaken as a joke. This was just someone looking for a way to respond with a slur.

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      • lobut@lemmy.ca ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        I agree with the banter with others. I do it with my friends. The thing is this … it has to go both ways and if they can’t jab back I usually give them a smile/hug and make sure they know I’m being a jerk. Like, they should be smiling after I take a jab at them.

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  • Flax_vert@feddit.uk ⁨21⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Fake: anon spends time with his parents Gay: time flies for anon

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  • graycube@lemmy.world ⁨19⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Go fishing until they are dead. Time will fly by.

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  • mastod0n@lemmy.world ⁨19⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I’m not saying you should break your dad’s nose but standing up to him like the kind of (toxic?) man he would accept would probably change his attitude.

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    • Saleh@feddit.org ⁨18⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      What is he going to do? Call the cops and tell them he got roughed up by a f-word?

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      • Revan343@lemmy.ca ⁨16⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        I mean yes, that’s exactly what the fucking coward would do

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  • MML@sh.itjust.works ⁨12⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    It’ll all be over quickly, after all time flies when you’re a fag, can I get that on a hoodie?

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  • ddplf@szmer.info ⁨21⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    just quit gaying bro

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    • Whostosay@sh.itjust.works ⁨20⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Why would you say something so hateful and divisive?

      Please dm me your current location so we can take our shirts off and kiss

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      • ddplf@szmer.info ⁨20⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Oh you loatful little egotistical brat, shut it with this DM thing.

        Why shouldn’t I just release this information right here, publically? You don’t like sharing, do you now?

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  • JimVanDeventer@lemmy.world ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    “Good one, dad! Hey, would you mind just standing at the top of these stairs real quick?”

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  • Zomg@piefed.world ⁨19⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Start fishing, dad will be dead in no time.

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  • Hudell@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Go fishing but come back with a full bucket of fish within an hour.

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    • camelbeard@lemmy.world ⁨13⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Sorry bucket is full of seamen

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      • vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        The Dreamcast game with a voice over by Leonard Nimoy? Pretty sure copies of it are kinda expensive nowadays.

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  • BuboScandiacus@mander.xyz ⁨14⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Image

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  • bathing_in_bismuth@sh.itjust.works ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Posts suck when anon is a faggot

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