glorkon
@glorkon@lemmy.world
- Comment on missing 1 week ago:
You should try my cheeseburger, brother.
Patties are beef mixed with unholy amounts of shredded parmeggiano. Add extra mature cheddar. Glazed onions. Sour pickle. German extra strong mustard. And bacon marmalade.
- Comment on How Coldplay actually sounds 2 weeks ago:
His wife was shocked when she saw that picture because she had no idea he’s a Coldplay fan.
- Comment on Don't mess with me bro 3 weeks ago:
Americans think Big Bang Theory is the funniest sitcom ever, and whenever a foreign word sounds like a funny English one, they lose their shit. And then they tell Germans about their sense of humor…
- Comment on Don't mess with me bro 3 weeks ago:
There’s a satirical movement in Germany called “Front deutscher Äpfel” (front of German apples). One of their slogans is “Was gibt der deutschen Jugend Kraft? Apfelsaft! Apfelsaft!” (“What gives German youth strength? Apple juice! Apple juice!”) They would approve.
- Comment on US Politicians praying inside the House of Representatives 4 weeks ago:
If these people have their way, the USA will become a religious autocracy that respects human rights on a level comparable to that in Iran.
- Comment on Ideally 5 weeks ago:
Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput!
- Comment on I am two of them 5 weeks ago:
As much as it pains me to admit you’re right, you appear to have hit the nail on the head.
- Comment on I am two of them 5 weeks ago:
I believe there’s a much broader spectrum as straight, gay, bi. I was never sure where I belong on this scala.
Like, I thought I was straight during my entire teens. Sometimes in the early 2000s, I discovered the joys of online porn, and then found that the guys in porn sometimes seemed more interesting to me than they should. But having sex with a guy? No way. I thought.
So I spent my life, a below average looking guy, starved for sex for a long time, except the occasional awkward and underwhelming experience with humans of the female persuasion. Smoking a lot of weed to fill the internal void. One day, met a fellow weed smoker online. Lived nearby, gamer. Knew where to get good weed. After a couple of weeks we met. He told me he was gay. I was like, alright, sure. We played NHL Hockey and smoked a lot of weed. He asked me if he could suck my dick. Stoned as fuck, I said yes. Best blowjob I’ve ever had. But then, I ghosted him. Why? No idea. Couldn’t face the fact that I might be bi? Not sure to this day.
In my late 30s, I got married. And turns out once we were married, my wife turned asexual. So now I’m stuck in a straight life with no joy and no sex, getting closer to 50 every day. Even had to quit smoking weed. Boy, do I regret ghosting that guy.
So to this day, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t turn down a gay guy if an opportunity arose, even though I lean more towards women. I’m just a guy leading a sad existence in the closet and this comment turned out to be a much gloomier confession than I intended it to be when I started typing. Sorry.
- Comment on Alley cat lunch 5 weeks ago:
In Germany, we have pickled herring too, but this German is happy to admit that Hollandse Nieuwe reigns supreme.
- Comment on 2025 be vibin' 1 month ago:
I’ve started working in IT over 20 years ago. In my humble opinion, one of the keys is being specialized on something that not everyone else can do. Become proficient in a certain area - devops, quality assurance, security, whatever.
On top of that, try and acquire a niche skill that makes you the type of employee that’s hard to find and replace. For example, banks are really desperate to find Cobol experts because most of them are pensioners now.
I know it’s tough, and I wish you had it as easy as I did back in the days, but it’s all I can tell you, unfortunately.
- Comment on You ever just take a shit so huge it boosts your mood after? 1 month ago:
No because those usually clog my toilet.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
I’m doing that, but I need other people to do that as well.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
Pretending doesn’t work for me, unfortunately. Gotta be real desire by real people for real me. It’s a curse.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
Yes, they’d cybersex me without looking at my face, but that is precisely what would not at all fulfill my desire to be considered attractive.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
I commend you for your opinion, but would I believe I got hotter? No. And that’s the point.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
Well, for me it really is the overwhelming desire of being found physically attractive by someone. Anyone. So relationships or one night stands, doesn’t really matter.
It’s literally an insane thought to me that even average looking girls don’t have a hard time attracting members of the opposite sex. But for me, any time I approached a girl, I got hit hard by rejection and humiliation. And now that I’m older, most women are married or in long-term relationships anyway, so things have become even more impossible. It’s become so ridiculous that the mere thought of being found desirable is a sexual turn on for me so I find myself imagining to be the woman when watching porn, even though I’m not attracted to men at all.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
Absolutely, and I am aware of that - it’s really the case with me. I do not dislike being male. I just dislike being ugly - not many people can claim to have spent 20 years as an involuntary celibate like me. I’m almost 50 and it just feels like so much wasted time. Wasted youth, really.
Going trans wouldn’t solve the problem at all. Nothing will solve the problem, to be honest. I have accepted my fate.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
But if a genie were to give me three wishes, becoming a super hot 18 year old girl would be on the list.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
Well, an ugly dude like me going trans would result in an ugly trans person, not an attractive woman, so there’s that.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
I would love to be an attractive woman. It would be like an all you can f*** buffet. I’m an ugly dude who has to work extremely hard to get laid. I dream of being sexually attractive. However, I really really would not wish to be trans. I simply don’t have the courage to face the backlash of all the bigoted backwards losers who hate on them. That’s why I absolutely admire and support trans people because unfortunately (and also somewhat ironically), in our day and age, it still takes a lot of balls to be trans.
- Comment on Congratulations, homosexual! 2 months ago:
Chariots!
- Comment on Dairy 2 months ago:
You beat me to it. Eek.
- Comment on Moar garlic 3 months ago:
You’re welcome! You’ll love it. There are tons of Youtube videos about this, btw.
And there are tons of great things you can do with it - for example:
Blend the soft garlic with parmeggiano, spread on slice of ciabatta, sprinkle with cheese, bake until golden brown, sprinkle some garlic oil and parsley. That’s fantastic garlic bread.
- Comment on Moar garlic 3 months ago:
120°C is good. Cook for at least one hour. Add aromatics like thyme or rosemary if you feel like it.
- Comment on Moar garlic 3 months ago:
I just prefer a good olive oil. The confit is way better used on pasta that way. But you’re right, rapeseed oil might be a better choice if you don’t want it to solidify.
- Comment on Moar garlic 3 months ago:
I always have some emergency garlic confit in the fridge.
Take an ovenproof baking dish, fill with peeled garlic cloves, cover cloves with high quality olive oil. Cover with tin foil. Cook for one hour in oven, low temperature.
Store in glasses. Will keep for weeks. Or months in fridge, although the oil will become solid.
Use it for whatever needs a garlic boost.
- Comment on Infinite Monkey Theorem 3 months ago:
As an IT guy, there will always be a special place in my heart for the awesome person who wrote a protocol suite for this use case (it is a lot of fun to read):
- Comment on Maybe it's just a human thing. 3 months ago:
Well in that case, if a religious person accuses you that you hate their god, it’s still not true. Because that religious person thinks of their god as a real entity, while you hate their concept of god. The target of that hate is not the same.
- Comment on Maybe it's just a human thing. 3 months ago:
That’s as may be, but that’s not the word that was used in the meme.
- Comment on Maybe it's just a human thing. 3 months ago:
No atheist hates god. How can you hate something you don’t think exists?
