It’s projection. It never made sense to me until I realized it’s all projection. They think gay people are going door to door exactly like they do.
They go door to door saying “Have you found Christianity? I’ve chosen to be Christian and I think it’s a great way of life. I think you should choose to be Christian, I think you should raise your children to be Christian, I think we should have a Christian society.”
So they just assume everyone else is going door to door “Have you found gayness? I’ve chosen to be gay and I think it’s a great way of life. I think you should choose to be gay, I think you should raise your children to be gay, I think we should have a gay society.”
Which to us is as ridiculous as going door to door “Have you found left handedness? I’ve chosen to be left handed and I think it’s a great way of life. I think you should choose to be left handed, I think you should raise your children to be left handed, I think we should have a left handed society.”
InvalidName2@lemmy.zip 2 days ago
Not to get too serious, given the topic and the community I’m in, but…
There’s a saying along the lines of “You can’t reason someone out of a position they did not reason themselves into.” And the overwhelming majority of the time, it’s completely true.
Ridiculous as it sounds, there are large numbers of people out there who believe that being gay is a choice. These people legitimately feel like any recognition and representation of homosexuality risks turning people gay.
You can spend all the time you want asking them when they chose to be straight and logically explaining things to them, it almost certainly will not matter.
HK65@sopuli.xyz 2 days ago
I can somewhat understand but of course not support that mindset.
Imagine if you held it as an axiom that “being gay is bad for you”. Then it becomes similar to addiction in their eyes, some people are more susceptible, some people are less, but it is the role of community to keep people away from indulging as it is bad for you. The choice that is presumed by them is not one of identity, but one of indulgence, the alternative they have is not “be straight”, but “don’t do gay things”, so they want people to do what normal people call “staying in the closet”.
For them, a gay person is like a crack addict saying “but being a crackhead is not a choice, I was born with it, and this is how I want to live my life”. And they fear to let their children next to this gay person the same way you’d be apprehensive of a crack addict, because they might give your kids crack and make them crack addicts too. And if you tell them that their kids might be gay too is like a crack addict telling you your kids might like crack too; well of course they might, but it’s bad for you so you shouldn’t do it.
Now of course society should stay out of our bedrooms, but that is an axiom held by us, but not by them. And partisan politics of course likes to keep these divisions up so that you vote for the one side, they vote for the other, and nobody questions why can’t we just live our lives in peace.
multifariace@lemmy.world 2 days ago
The response is always “having a choice means you are bisexual.”
icelimit@lemmy.ml 2 days ago
Time to relax my sphincter.
Roopappy@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Yeah, clearly. My similar answer has always been “Huh. It’s not a choice for me… Are you actively choosing not to be gay right now?”
It’s sad, but if you are constantly resisting the urge to be gay… you might be kinda gay. You might be happier if you stop fighting it.
frezik@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 days ago
It’s not true, but the way it plays out makes people think otherwise.
There are tons of first gen atheists who came from deeply fundamentalist families, and often believed everything well into adulthood. To name two examples, Bart Ehrman and Genetically Modified Skeptic.
What won’t happen is changing someone over the course of a single debate. They will come up with all sorts of mental gymnastics right on the spot. However, conversations like that do add up over time. An otherwise inquisitive mind will find a way eventually.
rayyy@lemmy.world 2 days ago
There are large numbers of incredibility stupid/ignorant/propagandized people out there who believe that being gay is a choice - FTFY.
fxdave@lemmy.ml 2 days ago
It’s not an instant switch like you pick up a sport. I believe everybody is bisexual at first, because the genitals work, no matter what sex, however, your soul gets specialized into a direction. I started having fantasies, I accepted those about girls, and rejected those about boys, based on my social norms that my environment gave me. And I became a happy straight guy. I can’t prove whether a different environment would have made me different, but I also cannot disprove it.
OutlierBlue@lemmy.ca 2 days ago
Then you’re bisexual. If your “first” instinct was that both genders could be attractive, you’re bisexual. But societal pressure convinced you to only seek out heterosexual relationships.