Ryanair be Like
Low quality cropping will officially launch on Lemmy in 2025
Submitted 1 day ago by ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/ef1c95b4-6179-4dc6-a4bb-7406a149925d.png
Comments
BudgetBandit@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
Akasazh@feddit.nl 20 hours ago
That’s majestic
gobbles_turkey@lemm.ee 2 hours ago
I’d pay extra to not have to deal with the TSA as well.
the_trash_man@lemmy.world 13 hours ago
Watch these cost the same as standard seats, and the cost of standard seats go up
NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world 13 hours ago
“You’re still a premium subscriber and have full access to our premium plan, but some of our options have changed.”
owl@infosec.pub 1 day ago
These standing seats have been coming next year for the past decade, but they always failed safety tests. Planes need to be evacuated within a certain time frame, which does not work when the plane is too densely packed.
Honytawk@feddit.nl 20 hours ago
Can’t they go Middle Earth on them and just create more doors?
Ek-Hou-Van-Braai@piefed.social 23 hours ago
I think we should relax rules on how quickly it is to evaluate a plane, and focus more on keeping the plane in the sky. (looking at you Boeing)
I'd love sleeping pods or bunk beds on a plane and accept the higher risk of not being able to get out quickly.
Cars and probably even train are infinitely more dangerous and we accept those risks every day.
Saleh@feddit.org 22 hours ago
There is no legitimate reason why trains or cars should be more dangerous modes of transport than flights. It is just that the lobbies for cars and capitalist train operations successfully desensitized everyone to it, so “deadly car crash” is just shrugged away. In the US we see similar attempts to make planes less safe and just accept the numbers of people killed in preventable events.
Jimmycakes@lemmy.world 8 hours ago
And if we are making rules about exiting a plane it should apply to when the plane lands normally. There is absolutely no reason it takes 30+ to get the fuck off the plane
Akasazh@feddit.nl 20 hours ago
Why not both?
Jimmycakes@lemmy.world 15 hours ago
Did the stronger younger people try pushing the frail and children out of the way during these safety tests? Because I feel like the plane world empty quickly in that scenario
isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de 14 hours ago
dont give them ideas!
barsoap@lemm.ee 19 hours ago
The lengths the US will go to to avoid building rail.
RowRowRowYourBot@sh.itjust.works 19 hours ago
This is almost certainly a European thing.
It is a European thing!
Blackmist@feddit.uk 17 hours ago
Because of course it’s Ryanair.
Oh, you want a seat? That’s an extra £50. Each. Both ways. Go fuck yourselves.
The EU needs to regulate the fuck out of that shitbag company.
Olgratin_Magmatoe@slrpnk.net 19 hours ago
It’s a capitalism thing.
Extract as much value as possible. Deliver as little value to your customers as possible. Treat them as second layer of product.
Human needs are not the goal.
barsoap@lemm.ee 19 hours ago
Ryanair has no plans to introduce them. (sorry for the metro link).
Also Ireland kind of gets a pass they don’t have a rail link to anywhere. A Dublin-Holyhead tunnel would definitely be a good idea.
Droggelbecher@lemmy.world 21 hours ago
How people can look at (mostly) state owned rail vs private airlines and still think the free market benefits the average person is one of life’s big mysteries to me.
MotoAsh@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
I mean, Trump won the vote, and Brexit won the vote… Something tells me it’s as simple as most people are fucking stupid.
EfficientEffigy@lemmy.world 1 day ago
This looks like a pain in the balls in case of turbulence
RogueBanana@lemmy.zip 17 hours ago
Some would probably enjoy some turbulence in their ass.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 8 hours ago
That’s right, girls. Start packing on those pounds because the only airline seat that poops, then lies about it doesn’t have farts in the headrest anymore.
nroth@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
Why don’t they do lay-down-only seats? Seems like you’d save the same amount of space or more with vastly more comfort.
ayyy@sh.itjust.works 12 hours ago
The serious non-joke answer is the same as the one for these standing seats: emergency exit speed. When an airplane crash lands you have like less than 2 minutes to get everyone out before the huge inferno happens and roasts people. So for standing seats that pack even more people into an airplane, they have to prove that they can still get everyone out before the deadline. For laying-down seats they would have to prove the same thing.
burntrealm@lemmy.zip 5 hours ago
Not only that, but also the mess it would make. Airlines make good money off of selling food and drinks, how are you going to consume those laying down? Very messily, that’s how. More mess = more time spent cleaning the plane = less time in the air = less ticket sales. Not to mention the loss in drink and food sales from people who don’t want to do that laying down. It’s a lose lose for the airline.
qarbone@lemmy.world 6 hours ago
I’ve been on enough planes to believe 2 minutes of evacuation time will see 5% evacuated and 95% trampled before the fiery inferno.
recall519@lemm.ee 11 hours ago
Just lean it forward and have everyone slide down and out of the emergency slide.
Agent641@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
Pop me out the side with compressed air like a decoy flare
Jimmycakes@lemmy.world 15 hours ago
People too fat
explodicle@sh.itjust.works 14 hours ago
So we’ll have them stand for hours instead?
UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
Why don’t they do lay-down-only seats?
Bigger and older passengers would find it more difficult to get into the top bunk than to ride a standing-only seat.
But it’s all shit regardless. Boeing can barely even make planes that don’t fall apart on the runway. The American airline industry’s fleet is increasingly defunct. The FAA is gutted. Airports are falling into disrepare due to mismanagement. You’ll be lucky to get any kind of air travel in another decade.
DoubleSpace@lemm.ee 16 hours ago
The FAA’s goal of zero air disasters will feel like a luxury in the future.
Dasus@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
Bigger and older passengers would find it more difficult to get into the top bunk than to ride a standing-only seat.
Wouldn’t the same group have trouble standing for an entire flight?
If only there was some sort of halfway point between lying down and standing up, something which would be easier to than lying down, but wouldn’t be as physically demanding as standing up.
Oh well.
Trollception@lemmy.world 12 hours ago
!remindme 10 years
CatDogL0ver@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
Yeah, since this is a shit post, why don’t they wrap the passengers like a piece of luggage and store them on a shelf? Save so much room… Just give them diapers! /S
ZeffSyde@lemmy.world 15 hours ago
An additional $25 Diaper Convenience Fee has been automatically added to your total.
20cello@lemmy.world 1 day ago
passengers hanging outside not before 2030
HK65@sopuli.xyz 22 hours ago
chiliedogg@lemmy.world 15 hours ago
Honestly, that may actually be more comfortable for me than trying to fold my legs into the tiny rows they have now.
turtlesareneat@discuss.online 13 hours ago
I am super torn here because pre-back-surgery me looks at these and says “the NERVE of these fuckers” and post-back-surgery me is like “Well that WOULD be nice yes”
bucketofcandyfloss@thelemmy.club 5 hours ago
banana chair
tatann@lemm.ee 1 day ago
Honestly, I’m pretty tall and if it gives more room for my legs, I’d like to have the option
WereCat@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Finally more leg room… But now you head bumps against the ceiling and you need to have your head tilted for the entire flight
tatann@lemm.ee 22 hours ago
Same answer as above
Most people can’t stand outside of the aisle because this area is meant to be seated (so they put storage space above the head). If the area outside the aisle is meant to be stood (not sure of my english), and they don’t remove the storage above the head, people are in their right to luigi those decision makers.
chiliedogg@lemmy.world 15 hours ago
I have to lean sideways anyway because my shoulders are too broad and the side of the plane is round.
There’s so much about flying that sucks as a big person.
My knees are folded up to my chest. I’m leaning to the right to stay off the fuselage. I can’t be in an aisle seat because I’m in the way of the crew, and I have to lean forward the whole time because someone is in the seat next to me. And that person hates me.
My dread of the flying experience is why I never go on vacations.
JustJack23@slrpnk.net 1 day ago
Why do you assume there will be leg room?
Carrot@lemmy.today 1 day ago
This. The who point is to cram more seats than they are currently able
Dave@lemmy.nz 1 day ago
Presumably standing seats means standing up? Hopefully not squatting seats.
Squirrelsdrivemenuts@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Will the height be adjustable? Otherwise the sitting thing will be either way to low or poking the backs of most people.
Demdaru@lemmy.world 23 hours ago
Insert short people dangling from them like kids from walkers xD
I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world 21 hours ago
I’ve always imagined it would be like the seats on a stand-up rollercoaster, which are admittedly pretty comfortable.
SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 1 day ago
If you can stand up in a plane outside of the aisle, you’re not tall.
tatann@lemm.ee 22 hours ago
Most people can’t stand outside of the aisle because this area is meant to be seated (so they put storage space above the head). If the area outside the aisle is meant to be stood (not sure of my english), and they don’t remove the storage above the head, people are in their right to luigi those decision makers.
tatann@lemm.ee 22 hours ago
No idea who fetterman is, I just image-searched “tall man in plane”
MotoAsh@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
Someone who won on progressive ideals and then immediately stabbed his constituents in the back by going full Democrat.
jaybone@lemmy.zip 23 hours ago
Is that fetterman?
al_Kaholic@lemmynsfw.com 23 hours ago
Is he a drooling clown in a hoodie and shorts?
ICastFist@programming.dev 17 hours ago
Solution: bring a cheap plastic chair as part of your luggage
MousePotatoDoesStuff@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
And if the plane fails, jump out of the plane with the chair and sit down/stand up as you’re about to hit the ground.
You won’t receive any fall damage during the animation.
(Make sure to check patch notes, this is a 2020 update exploit)
wetbeardhairs@lemmy.dbzer0.com 17 hours ago
Honestly I didn’t even realize until now how good the cropping is on lemmy compared to redd*t. holy shit the number of memes that came from screenshots of twitter screenshotted on insta screenshotted on whatever the fuck but this one was profile.
SnotFlickerman@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 day ago
So I guess no putting your head between your knees in the event of a crash then, huh?
SanicHegehog@lemm.ee 1 day ago
The only reason airlines would have you do that in the first place is so you can kiss your ass goodbye.
sundray@lemmus.org 23 hours ago
WereCat@lemmy.world 1 day ago
You need to pass yoga test to afford this seat
lectricleopard@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Maybe they could replace that with a noose that comes down next to the oxygen. Then, if you get claustrophobic, you get off the plane any time you want.
MotoAsh@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
That would require assisted suicide to be legal.
HootinNHollerin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 day ago
The ‘ol Marylin Manson
Akasazh@feddit.nl 20 hours ago
Well strapped to a sightly ergonomic plank upright is pretty safe, even better if you face away from the direction of the crash.
nuko147@lemm.ee 22 hours ago
There’s an idea. Flights that people can make standing, should be banned, except when there is a body of water between the destination.
RobotZap10000@feddit.nl 22 hours ago
Airlines: “You’re not gonna believe what clouds are made of…”
wieson@feddit.org 21 hours ago
I declare clouds are not a body of water, merely a spirit of water.
nuko147@lemm.ee 21 hours ago
Oh, yes corporations. I guess body of Liquid water then. 😂
roguetrick@lemmy.world 19 hours ago
I’m 6’6". Standing only seats would be preferable to me.
TaiCrunch@sh.itjust.works 18 hours ago
I’m 5’5" and I just know my legs would dangle like a child on their first roller coaster.
BreadAndThread@lemmy.world 15 hours ago
5’4" here. Yeah, I wouldn’t be able to reach the floor and would hang there like a rag doll. 🤣
blackris@discuss.tchncs.de 18 hours ago
Yeah, crouching like a gremlin under the hand luggage chutes? Fuck that.
roguetrick@lemmy.world 18 hours ago
Currently my strategy is to attempt to fold my legs under the seat because it’s not physically possible for my thighs to fit. Between kneeling and praying to the God of capitalism to not give me a dvr vs crouching like the subhuman ogre I am: I’ll crouch.
justme@lemmy.dbzer0.com 20 hours ago
It sounds quiet ridiculous, but I also had some flights that were so short (~50 min) that it almost took more time to seat everybody. Anyway, I would love to read those safety reports. Not only is sitting better on impact, but also cramping more people in the same machine, means more people (which trend to not comprehend the idea of leaving their luggage behind) share the exit routes.
atlien51@lemm.ee 20 hours ago
If people actually pay for this it’s on them
yoriaiko@lemmy.blahaj.zone 22 hours ago
Next step - put bicycle seats, reducent material for backs. Then add bicycle pedals for engines, to reduce fuel usage. None said anything about actually reducing ticket price by that, high prices stays forever.
barnaclebutt@lemmy.world 1 day ago
You need to fly somewhere? Okay, fuck you.
ExLisper@lemmy.curiana.net 1 day ago
Can I just sit on the floor like on a train in Poland?
Clinicallydepressedpoochie@lemmy.world 12 hours ago
Im ok with given it would probably be easier on my back
sundray@lemmus.org 23 hours ago
For a second I thought “Low quality cropping” was a new c/ being announced.
RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
I can’t wait to see people passing out or getting injured because of these seats.
Joeffect@lemmy.world 6 minutes ago
What could go wrong standing for two hours… Nothing probably if you’re a healthy young individual