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Put him on the cart.

⁨662⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://slrpnk.net/pictrs/image/de5aef0b-ed8f-48b9-859c-a4bae922224c.jpeg

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Comments

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  • Kolanaki@pawb.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    What happens if they hit the pope with the pipe hammer and he sits up and screams “Ow!” ??? 🤔

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    • jellyfishhunter@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      The hammer deals holy damage, so it’ll be very effective to keep hitting.

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      • YoiksAndAway@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        critical miss undead pope deals 15 crushing damage plus disease

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      • captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        Shouldn’t the pope be strong against holy damage? Unless…Holy shit someone call Dan Brown!

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    • Donkter@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Six more weeks of winter.

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    • ininewcrow@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Image

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      • trolololol@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        Rossi pra Papa! Você leu aqui primeiro, comigo.

        A eleição vai ser decidida na cage.

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    • markovs_gun@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      The hammer does +1d8 radiant damage against undead

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    • Bahnd@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      [insert monty python “Bring out your dead” sketch here]

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      • Kolanaki@pawb.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        “I feel happy! Happy! Hap-” thud

        “Thanks for that.”

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    • captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      I’m guessing the college of cardinals makes that decision on a case by case basis.

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      • Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        Shell cases, if that hammer is any indicator.

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    • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      If the pope can’t cast Abjure Hammer he doesn’t deserve to be pope

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  • juliebean@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    it’s fun, but alas, false.

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    • Kommeavsted@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      The snopes article doesn’t say it’s outright false, just that it’s not based on available evidence. So stating it as fact rather than rumor is misinformation.

      The Vatican has failed to deny it for over 20 years of inquiry. The impact of this claim is benign compared to pretty much anything else the church has factually done.

      it’s funny and harmless, meme on.

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    • lazyViking@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Yes, that is the definition of a factoid

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      • juliebean@lemm.ee ⁨5⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        i had never heard that definition of factoid before this thread, personally, so i figured folks might appreciate a source. *shrugs*

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  • papalonian@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    Fun fact: the word “factoid” means a false bit of information that is being passed as fact. It doesn’t mean “a small interesting tidbit of information”.

    Though I suppose the official definition will be changed since the proper one is seemingly dead

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    • Fetus@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      A really fun factoid is that factoids being false information is not actually true!

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      • dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        Ow, my brains.

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        • -> View More Comments
    • Dozzi92@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      You know, it should be obvious, but until you brought it up here, I was guilty of thinking of it as just some colloquialism (which it very well may be). But if you think of the suffix -oid, taking “humanoid” for example, you get something that isn’t presenting itself as a human. But I didn’t come to that conclusion, I just was like, wow, they bop the Pope with a hammer.

      So thanks.

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    • lenuup@reddthat.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Which means that OP used factoid correctly.

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    • Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Yeah, most lexicons being descriptive rather prescriptive makes etymology one hell of a twisted labyrinth. I agree it’s important for a lot of reasons. The last thing we need right now is a State enforcing some kind of “Newspeak”

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    • Agent641@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Factlet?

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  • TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    So…

    Like full swing or just a little tap tap?

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    • danekrae@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      He was wearing white, when he went into the room.

      Image

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      • TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        Image

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      • Firoaren@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        Szeth Son Son Vallano wore white on the day he was to kill a pope

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    • marine_mustang@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Gotta be concave for the conclave!

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    • DarkCloud@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      If they were physicists they’d hold the tip of the handle with a pinching gesture, then pull the hammer back to horizontal and let it drop. Swinging with a perfect arc it would thud into the pope’s head with just enough force to hurt anyone who was still alive, and get a response.

      However seeing as they’re still using a hammer to test for brain activity - we can assume the Catholic Church isn’t that friendly to science or something.

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      • DocMcStuffin@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        I shit you not, it took the Catholic Church until the 1800’s to finally accept that the Earth revolves around the fucking Sun. Maybe the 1750’s if someone’s feeling generous, but they were still censoring Galileo’s and Copernicus’s books at that time.

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  • mavu@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    reasonable precaution, if you also believe in spirits impregnating a woman who then birthed the son of god, everthings possible.

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  • Crackhappy@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    This is like those warning labels. Someone had to really fuck up to get some of those warnings made. Makes me wonder about this hammer.

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    • frezik@midwest.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Oh, they did. Telling if someone was really dead was difficult until modern medicine figured it out in the last century or so. People got buried alive by unwitting village elders all the time.

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      • Ganbat@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        it was common enough that the “Safety Coffin” was invented to help deal with it. If you heard a bell ringing in the graveyard, someone was alive down there.

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      • TheBat@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        You’d think it were unwitting village elders getting buried alive.

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  • NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    I bet that thing has incredible scaling in a FTH/STR build.

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    • Rhoeri@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      This guy Souls.

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    • v4ld1z@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      !soulslike@lemmy.zip :)

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  • otacon239@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    I want to believe this is real

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    • deus@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      It’s unclear. The Vatican denies it, but apparently weirder methods have been used to certify the passing of a pope before, so who knows.

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    • Ferrous@lemmy.ml ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Same. I had to look it up. In doing my deep research, I learned that they used an EKG on Jonny P II to confirm his expiration. That shit’s hilarious. It was someone’s job to EKG that OBVIOUSLY dead corpse, lol.

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      • GoodLuckToFriends@lemmy.today ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        Eh, a lot of the time EMS will do the same thing on a corpse call. It’s one of those ‘dot your is and cross your ts’ things. I’ll give the JPdub EKG a pass.

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    • mojofrododojo@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      iirc it was until the 19th or 20th century then…

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  • Draegur@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    It’s to make sure they STAY dead.

    Unsanctioned resurrections are strictly forbidden.

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    • nightofmichelinstars@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Or next thing you get two pope lines and one of them messes around with your vampire boyfriend

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    • trolololol@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      But if it’s during Easter, is it really forbidden?

      Or is this Jesus being a jealous prick?

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  • SpicyLizards@reddthat.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    They like to keep the bodies/relics so maybe there is a wack’a’pope machine in the vatican

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    • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Dunno about you, but I’m bopping the bishop right now bb.

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      • D_C@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        Pics or it didn’t happen!!

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  • lemmylommy@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    The inventor of this method: „he was dead before I hit him. I was totally just checking with my medical hammer, you guys. Believe me.“

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    • Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Everyone who wants a promotion, raise your hand! Keep them up if you believe my story!

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  • Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    Image

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  • BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    I FEEL POPE-Y! I FEEL POPE-Y!

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  • LordWiggle@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    Isn’t that what JD Vance did when he visited the pope, killing him?

    Since the Trump administration thrives on falsifying news, can’t we go in the counter offensive by mass spreading JD Vance killed the pope? I think this would be so funny and his dumb fanbase might actually believe it and start to hate him for it.

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    • Zwrt@lemmy.sdf.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Can anyone proof he did not Kill the proof?

      Were you there? Talked to someone in person who was there?

      If not, all the information you/i/we have got most likely delivered as a bunch of hackable pixels.

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      • Agent641@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        Just askin’ questions

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      • LordWiggle@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        You cannot prove a negative, so he did it.

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  • GreenKnight23@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    oh god

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    • gibmiser@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Now that’s a reference

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  • someguy3@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    Should hit him with a Klingon pain stick.

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    • trolololol@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      Glory to the Vatican house! Yesterday was a good day (for the Pope) to die!

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  • ArtificialHoldings@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    It’s giving Midsommar

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  • fargeol@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    A made-up factoid would have said seven hits with the hammer, so I guess this one is true.

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  • TachyonTele@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    Except this time the pope asked them to do it while Vance was in the room.

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  • ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    “Popehammer” sounds like the name of a Catholic Power Metal band…

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    • SkyezOpen@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

      I can’t offer you that, but that pope hammer does look awfully square.

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      • Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

        Image

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  • bdot@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    not sure which definition of “factoid” i should be using here…

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  • hedgehogging_the_bed@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    Nono, I remember this from JPII’s death. They yell his birth name 3 times into his room and then they use the hammer to smash his ring and seals. Dude was in a coma for a just long enough for us to hope for a Undead Pope -> Emperor on the Golden Throne situation.

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  • orbituary@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    Needs more JPEG.

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  • LumpyPancakes@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    Does a squirrel listen and determine good pope, bad pope?

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  • Nomad@infosec.pub ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    Reminds me of the dead sailors that would be sewn into their hammock and thrown overboard. And just to make sure they were really dead, they would sew one stitch through the nose.

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  • altphoto@lemmy.today ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    How about a holy tazer? You know, a little twitching goes a long way.

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  • frezik@midwest.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨month⁩ ago

    New DnD artifact dropped.

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