altphoto

@altphoto@lemmy.today

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Interesting and certainly worth a try⁩ ⁨⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩:

  Oh… I see.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨California Governor Newsom signs landmark AI safety bill SB 53⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  C’mon, look at him! He wants to be in the new $7 coin!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Any fuckin windows?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  How exciting! Our government is marginalizing another minority group!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Friday is a great F word⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  O!..nope, I’m afraid there’s no O.

• Pan design done!lemmy.today ↗
  Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩ | ⁨3⁩ ⁨comments⁩
• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨And the pre-peeled containers for 4x the price are a ripoff⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  That’s exactly how I would feel if someone had my trapped and told me they would stick pomegranates up my rear end.

  !No! No pomegranates!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Necessary post procedure care for vasectomy⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  Imagine being the guy at the assembly line in China…why fo I need to polish my welds down to Ra16?..ohhh! Its for a chicken? Oh the other bird! Wow, I need to polish more! Maybe test fit before shipping!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨oui oui⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  Baguette! Haa haarrr grr!

  Baguette!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨What would happen to the Earth if it got booped by a giant asteroid going super slowly?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  Well the moon is falling away. It’s actually much harder to fall into earth by having the exact direction to actually hit us directly. This is because space is mostly empty. If you think of your self as an intergalactic giant that would try to hit earth from far away using a moon marvel what would you see as the target? Yup, a pale blue dot. But try anyway because putin and the other undesirables live here and they want to get to you on a rocket.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Wireless charging is the dumbest invention ever created⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Hey, could someone bum a wireless charge my way?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Mozilla Integrates Google Lens for Visual Search in Firefox Desktop⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  I need a doggie please and a cowgirl but in reverse. And I’m getting hungry for some spitroast. Oh Firefox do you think you could help?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨AI-Generated “Workslop” Is Destroying Productivity⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Maybe that’s the strategy! Just pay them to stop.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨What would happen to the Earth if it got booped by a giant asteroid going super slowly?⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  But only if it was already exactly in a crash course. Otherwise it would end up as a moon as soon as it missed crashing the first time.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Microsoft doing shady Microsoft stuff again⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  If you use Solid works at work you’ll be welcome with More retarded ones like:

  Error occurred.
  An item in your assembly needs to be saved X 1000 consecutive windows saying the same thing even if you hit cancel or don’t show again.

  Solid works is phaking regarde…retarded.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Microsoft doing shady Microsoft stuff again⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  My Linux firefotz browser never gives this error.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨save the planet 🌎⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Thanks but it’s my natural state. I can share.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨save the planet 🌎⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Those ships are powered by baby chickens.

  First they load up the tanks full of baby chickens. The chicks travel into a conveyor belt where a long row of old women pick up the chicks to if they are male or female. The females are grown to make more eggs. The males are tossed into the intake. The males are then mixed with air and tar and then injected into the piston at high pressure. Once top dead center is reached, a spark drivers the pressures to hundreds of PSI and as much as 800 C. The chicks have been known to survive up to that moment.

  If they can perfect chick injection they will try more compact fuels like puppies, crocks, whales, baby elephants, the homeless and or orphans. They might end up stuck with birds so they might try just eagles. There are enough of each eagle to push the boats a good two or three miles!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨advertisement⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  OK, having intense scrotum pain. Instructions unclear. How do I pee the WD40 out?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Who got raptured today?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  May I offer you my very warm hole for a few minutes? Its only $5.99! Its for a good cause!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨A Cyberattack on Jaguar Land Rover Is Causing a Supply Chain Disaster⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  Sure I agree. I suggest getting jobs at companies that make smaller cars. But yes totally agree that having no job sucks. I’m probably going to be loosing mine soon. We’re currently in heavy design of a hail Mary type of product launch. The wheels are coming off left and right. Once we the design team is done, then less of us are needed. So we’ll be discarded too. By Christmas. Hopefully the hail Mary works out. I’m trying to become independent somehow. Its just really tough to do that.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨A Cyberattack on Jaguar Land Rover Is Causing a Supply Chain Disaster⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  Jaguar? Land Rover? Asshole cars for mostly assholes… You know the usuals cutting you off or speeding past you just to get to the red sooner. I say “continue”. LOL. Seriously, don’t get a jag.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨New Arizona law to restrict online porn access; Pornhub will block state⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  In other news plumbers are moving out of Arizona and into Nevada where the clogged sinks are more prominent now.

  When interviewed one plumber explained how women’s falling hair and men’s sperm coming together as the principal clugged sink reason made their job, and I quote “easy as fuck, you just pull the hair with a wire and all the cum stuck hair plug comes out in one move” ending with a final comment, and I quote “fuck”.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Very important update: it's up to 14 poptarts!⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  Does he know that there are poptarts on his head?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨My credit union no longer allows me to payoff pending purchases made on my credit card⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  Time for a different credit Union? Hopefully not a bank. Credit unions are best.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Outsourcing⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  I think my wife could agree with this ideology. But I have to check.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨UNDER THE THC 🎶⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I’m vegan and gave never partook…could I get my tofu in the THC chamber to calm it down? Its for a friend.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨600 GB of Alleged Great Firewall of China Data Published in Largest Leak Yet⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Ofcourse I’m half kidding but mostly kidding. You can translate files anywhere these days.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Southern hospitality⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  They might house arrest the dancers until they can prove to be citizens.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨600 GB of Alleged Great Firewall of China Data Published in Largest Leak Yet⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  And translated right? Right? Lol that’s the biggest wall…language.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨It's finally here!⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  A jump, a whistle and a fart simultaneously? Sounds like an Olympic sport.