“Interesting, may I see?” And when they hold their wrist up to you, inspect it closely, then lick it, make some faces like a wine connoisseur, shake your head and say :“It’s fake” turn around and disengage.
"And my dick fucks your wife more than you do. What's your point?"
Submitted 3 weeks ago by Stamets@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/834b50be-8133-4b6a-87be-e4877f86fdc1.jpeg
Comments
dwindling7373@feddit.it 3 weeks ago
“I don’t have a car”
Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 3 weeks ago
A power move when you know they know you have a car and it’s literally parked right outside
musubibreakfast@lemm.ee 3 weeks ago
Or maybe double down: “I live in my car.”
agent_nycto@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
FireIced@lemmy.super.ynh.fr 3 weeks ago
The 3rd feature really convinced me
Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Godzila is more likely to keep accurate time.
Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 3 weeks ago
“Ok?”
9point6@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Korne127@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Ok; good for you?
ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
Serious answer:
That’s cool. What makes it special?
Sometimes people talk about how expensive something they own is simply because they’re proud that they could afford it and even when they’re being tone-deaf, there’s no benefit to getting offended when you could just move the conversation along instead. (Although you might have to listen to them talk about watches.) If they were trying to brag, now they’re stuck trying to explain why the watch is actually worth what they paid and you’re the one judging them.
Cars (and watches) aren’t so expensive that a middle-class person can’t plausibly already own the one he would buy even if money was unlimited. My former mother in law was bothered by the fact that I owned an old car, but when she would bring it up I would just say “I really like the 2008 model.” She couldn’t argue with that.
thermal_shock@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
I feel special when my 6 year old laptop runs circles around your new shit because I know how to maintain it and don’t install every fucking app I find.
Preflight_Tomato@lemm.ee 2 weeks ago
& also you probably know to spec it appropriately; most slow laptops I see have 8 gigs ram.
phantomwise@lemmy.ml 2 weeks ago
That’s cool. What makes it special?
Nice one. If it’s only a status thing he’ll scrabble to find something to say about it other than it’s price. And on the very very low chance that it’s not, he’ll have an excuse to explain. Who knows, he might be a watch nerd who’s really proud that he could afford that watch because it’s a special watch to watch nerds for watch related reasons and he’ll tell you all about it.
starman2112@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
All these comments are trying too hard. The only two options are “OK?” and “that watch?”
Verbose disses only work in rap
untorquer@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Alternatively, “And it’s a very nice watch.” Bonus points for riding the line between nonchalance and condescension while still being a compliment.
KeenFlame@feddit.nu 2 weeks ago
Aahhhh winner:
“that watch?”
You are awesome. Now the ball is on their side and covered in two layers of diarrhea
Diurnambule@jlai.lu 2 weeks ago
Ho I have the same one. That the only one you have?
Knock_Knock_Lemmy_In@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Or a Guy Richie film.
“Bleedin 'ell. You’ve bin 'ad mate. Blonde Tony was selling those daan the Nags 'ed last week for a pony. 5 for a ton.”
tetris11@feddit.uk 2 weeks ago
*scratches head with gun*
aesthelete@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Sounds like you got ripped off
tfm@europe.pub 2 weeks ago
Nooo bro it increases in value bro I’m investing in watches bro
ZeffSyde@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
But it’s gone up $200 since I bought it in 2014!
JoMiran@lemmy.ml 3 weeks ago
If you need to point out the watch and explain its value, you’ve already lost.
Theprogressivist@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
“Well, the jerk store called, and they’re running out of you!”
blinfabian@feddit.nl 3 weeks ago
“What’s the difference? You’re their all-time bestseller!”
Theprogressivist@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
“Oh yeah?! Well… I slept with your wife!”
Console_Modder@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
You see this? This is called a “smart phone.” Not only will this tell me the time like your watch, but it can also do a bunch of other things. I can look at pictures of raccoons wearing silly hats or I can use it to insult someone on the other side of the planet. It also cost a fraction of what your watch cost. I’m sorry to tell you this, but I think it should go and get your money back. It sounds like you’ve been scammed. As a matter of fact, let me give you my friend’s phone number. He’s an accountant, and I think he’ll be able to help stop you from making stupid purchases in the future.
6nk06@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
Not only will this tell me the time like your watch
No. A cheap $100 phone is way more reliable than the most expensive Rolex thanks to NTP.
JoMiran@lemmy.ml 3 weeks ago
If you’re an astute collector, fine watches are (like art) a solid form of investment.
captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
Prove me wrong: Fine art is a money laundering scheme.
You get some guy who went to art school to slosh some house paint on a sheet. You then hire a white woman who dresses like Malian royalty to come describe it in contradictory adjectives “It’s subtle, yet bold” while her gay sidekick in a turtleneck flamboyantly slaps his face and gasps. Sell $20 worth of cotton and $30 worth of Valspar for $3.247 million, and you’ve just successfully covered up the sale of 94 more brown women.
Taleya@aussie.zone 2 weeks ago
“So?”
That’s the response you want. Complete andutter boredom. You don’t care. Their entire personality is built around a weird little status structure and if you don’t buy into their hallucination they lose their everloving minds
paperazzi@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
“Ok” is my go-to. It feels dismissive because it is.
OneWomanCreamTeam@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
“that’s a lot of money for such an ugly watch.”
axh@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Does none to 60 in ONE minute! It’s garbage.
FireIced@lemmy.super.ynh.fr 3 weeks ago
You. You’re funny!
Randelung@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
It time travels at one second per second and only forwards.
umbraroze@piefed.social 3 weeks ago
"I don't have the habit of looking at other people's watches. Thanks for pointing it out, I guess, I might have otherwise missed that detail entirely."
(Biz-bro mind cannot comprehend this)
Soleos@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
The statement is to set them apart from from you and to display power. So you could go with something like,
“Shit, they still make you buy your uniform when you rich eh. Some things never change.”
But more elegantly. Reassert that they are subject to others’ power/approval and relate to them to assert that they’re no different from you.
EndOfLine@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
“People with true value don’t need trinkets to convince others of their worth.”
“Not everybody knows how to make the best use of their resources.”
“Unless it has a button that stops time, you paid too much.”
boonhet@lemm.ee 2 weeks ago
All of those likely would make you sound poor and mad to that kinda person. Not sure what you could actually say as a comeback that would work
RagingRobot@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
What kind of dumbass would spend that much on a watch?
Spezi@feddit.org 2 weeks ago
What kind of dumbass would spend so little on a watch?
borokov@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Why the fuck would I drive a watch ?
IndustryStandard@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
“How fast does it do 0-60?”
recklessengagement@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
About a minute
EmpathicVagrant@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
So it’s not even accurate? I’m not sure you got a quality timekeeping device for the cost.
AeonFelis@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
It never gets to 60. For some odd reason it only gets to 59 and then drops back to zero.
insaneinthemembrane@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
And then throw it.
Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
You paid that much for a watch that looks like you steal from your grandad?
pineapplelover@lemm.ee 2 weeks ago
kungen@feddit.nu 2 weeks ago
It even comes with the bonus of extra TSA screening!
Dasus@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Clepsydrae@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Look of confusion Does…does that make you happy?
aliceblossom@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
“Wow, you’re really shit at bargaining. They really took you for a ride!”
CherryBullets@lemmy.ca 2 weeks ago
A classic that always makes people like this angry is the good ole, "Anyways, [Something you are casually going to do today or did yesterday]- " and a hand wave to dismiss the statement.
It infuriates them lol
phlegmy@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
Do you say shit like that because nobody can tell the difference between your watch and a cheap one?
funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 2 weeks ago
“what?”
“I’m sorry I didn’t catch that”
“one more time?”
“ok. thanks for letting me know.”
Padit@feddit.org 2 weeks ago
“Okay?”
I am not a friend of clever comebacks. People who point these things out are pathetic and people who get triggered by that only slightly less so.
roscoe@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 weeks ago
I guess it’s true, money can’t buy taste.
Fun fact: Alec Baldwin’s character was invented for the movie to provide exposition. The filmmakers didn’t trust movie-going audience to pick up the information from the three conversations that occur at the beginning of the play.
iii@mander.xyz 3 weeks ago
The classic “OK boomer” still gets them angry
Windex007@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
This is right, where every other comment in this thread is wrong.
Don’t take the bait.
Even just a flat OK is better than taking the bait. Honestly, silence is better.
Do you care? Then you are poor and mad.
captainlezbian@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Ah unimpressed ok is probably the best response.
FiremanEdsRevenge@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Pretty sure no one is replying seriously.
FireIced@lemmy.super.ynh.fr 3 weeks ago
Well “ok boomer” is just replying with another rage bait
Gigasser@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
This would be my response: “Oh wow! That’s so cool, I didn’t know Casio made watches that expensive!”
vala@lemmy.world 2 weeks ago
Idk man the Godzilla watch in the other comment got hands.
ColeSloth@discuss.tchncs.de 3 weeks ago
What if they’re 25?
musubibreakfast@lemm.ee 3 weeks ago
Then you just give them a hug and tell them everything will be ok.
zjti8eit@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 weeks ago
Then OK boomer is even better.
fushuan@lemm.ee 2 weeks ago
Uuuh… ok?.. Weirdo…
Obnomus@lemmy.ml 2 weeks ago
LMFAO