Submitted 18 hours ago by scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech to mildlyinfuriating@lemmy.world
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Lucky for me my parents were both “I didn’t save anything for retirement, my kids will take care of me when I’m older”, so I don’t have to suffer through this.
Stark self sufficiency and individualism is their philosophy. Too bad they forgot what their parents gave them so they could reach that point.
Honestly, I’m young, and I know older people that would spend it better than their kids.
That’s not everyone, of course, but maybe instead of blaming people born at a slightly different time we should focus on being mad the we only can have money if we inherit it.
I mean, didn’t they do the exact same thing with the planet?
Also they will spend it on expensive overpriced healthcare they voted for.
“Fuck you, I got mine.”
-Boomers
The people who are cool with this going “why shouldn’t my parents enjoy what they made, why would you want anything you didn’t work for?” are sort of missing the point. The real phrasing, that they probably would agree with, is “why should I support my children and future generations, my enjoyment is more important than their survival and secured future”
If you really think that you should only get what you work for, give back every Christmas or birthday present or any gift you’ve gotten or are getting in the future immediately. Turn down any bonus you get at work. Hell start paving your own roads.
Supporting others, especially family, is a good human trait, and shouldn’t be erroded.
I don’t think rejecting Christmas gifts is on par with telling your parents not to enjoy themselves because you want their money when they die.
I’m going to spend my money and wealth as I see fit. I will not raise my children to bank on me dying before they turn 60 (realistically they’re gonna have to deal with me for a long time) so they can inherit some sum of cash.
For context, I never expected any inheritance from either parent when they died. Neither did I get anything except for a pair of gloves.
I grew up in the boat of not ever expecting any type of inheritance. Then my dad remarried and it is a thing, and that discussion that makes me really uncomfortable. I am in the first camp. I don’t feel any sense of ownership or entitlement to that money.
She wants to go on a fancy trip to Bali? Good for her.
New car? Awesome.
He raised me, that was his responsibility. He did a great job and that’s all I needed.
I am sure there will be something left but I’m not hedging all of my bets on it. Work bonus stays with me, though.
I’m sorry if this is worded weirdly; my dad passed away two years ago and I am still getting used to the past tense.
I’m setting up my kids for their own success. 529 plan, lessons in work ethic and social skills. I donate often, and might leave some funds behind but real support shouldn’t have to be monetary.
Yeah, my parents go on regular vacations all over the world, have redone their kitchen THREE times in the last decade (along with every room of their entire 3000 sq ft house), and can’t be bothered to help me out when I encounter a major expense.
Minor suggestion. Try dying poor at your boss’s desk. You have nutrients and minerals that can be extracted for our use, don’t be a hog.
This is a bad faith take that only reflect the experiencs of the wealthiest boomers. There are elderly people struggling with Medicare and social security being cut. Remember, there’s not an age war, there is a class war.
Worth repeating:
It’s a class war, but many boomers are scabs.
Remember when there was a worker shortage and retired boomers went and volunteered at chain restaurants so they wouldn’t have to raise wages to attract workers? Remember all the “millennials are so entitled, they want to be PAID FOR WORK” style posts by boomers, back when some non-boomers still used Facebook so we had access to their posts?
It’s not their fault they’ve been brainwashed by right-wing propaganda, but they for sure are fighting against anything resembling economic justice.
And obviously much like any generation, you can’t make sweeping statements about them. There are right-wing nutters in their 20s and even their teens out there right now and there are obviously boomers who aren’t selfish assholes.
Oh good I was looking for this comment.
If this is really a Forbes article (it’s just a picture not a link), it is one of an endless stream of opinion pieces by monied interests that pit the populace against each other to distract what the billionaire oligarchs are doing.
This is my parents. I found out from a relative that after my mom suffered an injury, that her husband was spending $2000 a month on fast food. Literally TWOOOOO THOUSAND dollars on fried chicken a month. Boomers are awful.
They spent it on groceries then voted for an orange dipshit .
I mean I’m not crazy about inheritance anyway for some reason it gives me the jeebies.
My dad just died destitute and my mother will probably have nothing when she passes. I’m ok with that, I am my own person. People complaining about losing out on inheritance are fucking spoiled brats.
This is a flippant and unproductive comment that ignores the fact that we have a culture of passing down what you have to your children so that they can have a better life than you had. I get not everybody is entitled to it but it’s kind of considered a major goal for a lot of Americans to do that for their children. Which means it reflects poorly on the boomers who have said “nah fuck you” after also pillaging our future for their wealth.
Seems like completely consistent behavior, and it reflects accurately on them.
Somehow, I grew up in the one neighborhood in the city that hasn’t had a spike in value in the last couple of decades. My mom refuses to move out to a retirement community (at this point she would need assisted living). She likes to talk about improving the property and what color she should paint the upstairs. Watches flipper shows all day.
I don’t have the heart to tell her that I have no interest in inheriting the property and that it will be a huge burden to liquidate all of the ‘antiques’ she has gathered over the last 80 years that now stink of cat piss and many colors of mold.
She’s always been there for me in my darkest hours, though, and so has that shit mid century ranch.
I’ll still let her win at Wheel of Fortune, as long as she can remember my name.
You’re a good kid.
Who the fuck downvotes this?
My mom just wanted to make enough to spend it over her lifetime, and that seems fair to me. She got nothing from her parents and had to support her own mom in her old age, and didn’t want to cost us anything.
I would argue that inheritance is a huge driver of inequality. I have gotten small amounts from the estate of my dad’s parents (my dad died when I was 16) and a childless relative and even those amounts jumped us ahead some, I can imagine what some huge amount unearned would do - but it’s just that. Unearned.
Middle class families passing down inheritance is not a driver of inequality.
A dozen individuals controlling 60% of the wealth in America is.
Which is the big unspoken thing here: the only reason millennials/ Gen Z would even care about ‘inheritance’ is because everything has gone so fucking far to shit that it seems the only way to claw out of the hole they’re being shoved into. It’s turned into a lottery wish.
They can both be drivers of inequality, but the billionaire bullshit is by far the greater kick in the nuts.
Yeah but how did they get it, and who will get it when they die? It’s like a feedback loop.
Inheritance is still inequality in that those receiving it did nothing to deserve it.
Isn’t that better anyway? Inheritance makes the world less fair, as children of rich parents will get a huge advantage. If that money is instead spent, it hopefully distributes over society again instead if staying in the rich families.
It’s obviously not that black and white, getting some money is a great help to you get people. And obviously a parent will want to help their children, that’s totally fair. But as a larger trend it doesn’t seem like a bad thing to me.
The people with millions and billions of dollars aren’t spending all of it before they die. It’s the old people with tens of thousands, maybe hundreds of thousands.
Oh yes, all that money spent on cruise liners will definitely distribute over society
In the same way that we should stop consuming media that blames everything on millennials, we should stop consuming media about how uniquely difficult it is for millennials.
Complaining about the younger generation, and the younger generation complaining that they have it uniquely difficult, has been the experience since the invention of teenagers. It was my experience, and it’ll be the same experience when millennials are my age.
I’m sure that the younger generations were complaining right before the fall of room too, they needed to get over it, what a bunch of losers.
I was sitting in the room while my friend’s dad was having a argument with his horrible dad. The horrible dad threatened to write him out of his will, and my friend’s dad respond, “Why do you think I’d want 1/6th of fuck all anyway?”
I wouldn’t be so blunt with my mother about things, but every time she talks about inheritance I encourage her to just spend the money on herself. Anything will be spilt between 7 kids overall (3 hers, 4 my late step dad). She is holding on to an expensive ring because my very well off, money hungry sister, has basically demanded it, so I’m working behind the scenes to try get her to sell it so she can invest in making her last few years that much easier.
My father was extremely open about his plans to spend it all. My in laws as well. I did get a small inheritance once, a few thousand dollars from a great grandpa that went to me because the legal battle for it outlived my mom. I hope I get sentimental things from my grandparents because that’s the remainder of my incoming inheritance
“This memorable reminds me of the cash I inherited from my grandpa”
My dad - who was an amazingly racist conspiracy theorist - gave all his money to 2 redhead women he started fucking after divorcing the woman he married after my mom died.
He chose not to leave me anything because I called him out for using the “n” word any time he talked about African Americans.
I’m out $150k
He is out having a legacy. My kids will never know his name, story, or hate.
Well, at least he fathered a decent kid, it seems. I don’t think it was his intention for you to turn out so decent, so I wouldn’t give him credit for that, but I guess he did something right despite all his efforts.
He didn’t, though.
Foster Care, then they adopted me.
No, some people just raise up to the task.
I hate this idea that parents “did something good” if they are pieces of shit but their kids turn out good. Especially if there is no evidence of it. Why people feel the need to do that is a mystery for me, like protecting the bad guy at any cost.
No this reasoning is flawed and used as an excuse for bad behavior. My father justified his alcoholism to himself by pointing out how independent all the kids turned out since he was useless, or how good we were with money because we could sense a scam from a young age as he was always trying to scam/manipulate us.
You can teach someone to cross the road by explaining the dangers and process to them, or you can teach them by driving enough cars into them that they either figure it out themselves (and carry the scars forever) or die. That doesn’t make you a good teacher
Congratulations on being a decent person even though your role model was not. It’s hard to break that cycle.
*without
No one should expect to inherit anything when their loved ones die.
The worst people are those that are too lazy to build something on their own, but sit around praying for their parents death so they can inherited and live an easy life.
Lewis Carroll has an interesting piece about that. Brings up the point that if someone works hard to benefit the community, and their wealth represents the response of the community to repay that person’s work, perhaps it’s not unreasonable that that person’s request is, “repay it to my children,” i.e. inheritance.
Where possible, its nice to leave something. It’s not nice to expect or demand it.
My aunt talked her mom out of kitchen remodel because it’s going to cost so much (that she’ll get smaller ineritance then) while my grandmom, who already spends most of her time alone at home then can’t even spend her savings to make her surroundings a bit nicer.
The hospitals and retirement facilities plan to absorb every cent left.
“we set our money on fire and voted for trump. good luck” - boomers
You guys are getting a good luck?
“we love voting for trump despite being poor as fuck because we are complete morons that have been brainwashed by andrew tate and joe rogan clips on tiktok” -gen z men
class issue, not age issue. though i do understand getting frustrated at people who fall for the grift
I was sexually/otherwise abused by my mother for most of my life. When I brought it up to family, I was basically told to shut up about it/“go to therapy.” They spent thousands torturing me in troubled teen facilities, and provided me with nothing for college (which I paid for with multiple jobs and sex work.)
I will never own a house. I spent almost two years after my divorce to just be able to afford an apartment. My family has never valued me - I will not give them the comfort they denied when it is the end. My entire life has been a hell.
My family tells me “write a book then I will read it” and I just keep thinking:
Assholes, maybe instead just listen to me when I tell my stories you want to ignore so badly.
They couldn’t even be bothered to spend thousands on me though and more than once in my life I have just been dropped off at street corners with hopes that I would disappear from their lives.
It sucks. While I may not know you, I know similar pain and know it’s never easy. I hope you find comforts in the little things around you.
Ouch. I’m sorry to hear that. Wish I could offer you better help than, condolences and understanding from the other side of the internet.
I want my parents to enjoy the money they worked their entire life for. I believe work is meant to live, and not the contrary where you live to work. I would 10000x rather my parents enjoy the effort they put for their money instead of dying of exhaustion without being able to use their money
Posting this as infuriating seems grossly entitled. Many of us in these younger generations won’t have excess to give to the next generation, why should we feel that is owed to us?
You may be right, but at the same time, you getting an inheritance makes it allot easier for your kids to get one too some day.
My grandpa wants to go to space in his lifetime, but doesn’t want to spend everything he’s been saving for my us. I’m like…dude. You worked your ass off all this time. Go to fucking space.
Dying happy and accomplishing your dreams is much better than any amount of money because money is just a number. I have a good job and family and enough money that I don’t really have to think before buying something (even though for most i still do because I don’t like wasting and impulsiveness is a bad thing). I’ve seen and heard way to many stories of people delaying their retirement by “just one more year” and that ends up the year that they either get very ill, hurt themselves or just plain die, always with a huge pile of money. Money also shouldn’t be spent when old, because you cant enjoy it to the same degree
Sure and that’s fine, but then we need to stop as a society assuming that generational wealth is a thing, and that parents will help their children. Parents do not help with down payments like they used to, or with other major life events, and so we need to assume everyone is starting from zero
What on earth are you talking about? Generational wealth is not a binary thing. There are people rich enough to pass their fortune to their kids and then there are ones who can’t. That’s how it has always been and that’s how it’s always going to be.
How can we be there, with all the accumulated wealth in the world? How can we be seriously believing everybody should start at zero? I can’t believe what I’m reading here. Generational wealth is absolutely a thing, we inherit everything from the past. As a species, we inherit the wealth of the previous generation. Where are we imagining it goes? There is so much wealth in the global economy, the issue is of distribution.
Well, that really depends on the society. I don’t live in one that makes such assumptions. It feels a little bit entitled to assume something like that, but that could also just be cultural differences between developed and non-developed countries. The former have social security and safety nets, rendering an inheritance less important and much less prominent. Feels like the only inheritance worth even thinking about is if you have millions in excess of what you need for living, and in developed countries that is very much less prominent than in developing countries
The big caveat to this is if it is a lot of money. If it more than a few million it should be passed down and someone can live off of interest and some good investments.
I know a guy who technically doesn’t have to work at all because his family has been passing down a huge amount of money though the generations. I guess his great great grandfather struck it rich and now everyone is set. How the fortune is maintained is though legal stuff tied to the money in the form of wills. Basically it prohibits crazy spending and sets rules.
When my grandparents passed away they left my boomer mother a fully paid off duplex…
Which she immediately reverse mortgaged to fund her retirement because she has nothing.
A house my grandmother designed, and great grandmother financed and built, where 4 generations of my family lived and literally died, will be pissed into the wind when my mother dies.
“Generation Me.”
millennials may miss out
Love how that title makes it sound millennials are somehow to blame
I don’t see that. To me it reads as guilt tripping the parents for wanting to spend the money they themselves earned.
It is one thing if a kid’s parents just does not have the means, but the article points out that some baby boomers (maybe more commonly in a the west?) can have tendencies to be spiteful toward people deemed less. Maybe this happens more so in WASP culture.
I’m personally of the belief that if I ever chose to have kids, that I would see it to the end that they felt supported, regardless of their age. The kids themselves didn’t ask to be born.
A lot of cultures who have these values, I notice, have kids that thrive a lot more. I have some friends from east Asia, and they all were encouraged to be independent and pursue meaningful careers. Their parents support them intensely, and help with investments and other forms of support.
My biological father’s family is Jewish (nonreligious). My first cousin is very successful and I know has been set up to have a meaningful career, because my aunt let her live at home during graduate school, and paid for her graduate degree in speech pathology. She will inherit the house she grew up in.
I grew up in WASP culture on my biological mother’s side, and my mom has the attitude that she wants nothing to do with me, especially after I turned 18.
Indeed, OP is a stupid take. For all the shit boomers pulled off with this planet, spending their own money is a good thing.
More like … “Boomers decide to watch and accelerate the burning of the world because they’re going to die soon anyway”
Lol my dad left me everything he had when he died. So, I got a truck.
When my mom goes, my sister and I might get to split a house we don’t want that’s on its third or fourth refinancing.
I guess if your parents don’t have an inheritance to give you just never consider not getting one to be a problem.
What’s infuriating about this? Why the heck should I inherit something I haven’t worked for? I’ve always told my parents and grandparents that dying with an empty bank balance is the ideal way to go. Hell, preferably be in debt.
Watched my mom work her ass off to raise me and save everything she could for retirement. She got to do some fun things, but not enough. I’m glad she had good insurance and a little money saved for when she got sick. I inherited a house with a mortgage, taxes, insurance, and repairs that are bleeding me dry and I’m pulling money out of my retirement to cover it. I’m thankful that it’s given my son a decent place to live for the last year and i hope to break even when we sell it. I’m fine with that. I didn’t earn it. I didn’t take care of her for money. If you’re only helping your family because you want money, you suck and they’re probably better off without you.
Taleya@aussie.zone 17 minutes ago
Jokes on you, i grew up poor and never had an expectation of shit.
scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech 12 minutes ago
Read the body of my post