dingus
@dingus@lemmy.world
- Comment on Boomers with their loud Samsung phone sounds 2 days ago:
Do you think it’s a modern phone thing? I used to always be able to feel my phone vibrating. But when I got a new phone several years back, I was frustrated to find that I couldn’t feel the damn thing vibrating in my pocket and I’d miss calls and texts.
- Comment on Boomers with their loud Samsung phone sounds 2 days ago:
Yeah I don’t get what the issue is with notification sounds.
I’m not sure what it is, but ever since I got a more modern phone, the vibration motor has just gotten so weak compared to older phones I’ve used. I legitimately do not feel my phone vibrating in my pocket.
So when I’m at work, if I’m expecting a message, I actually have to turn the sound on and listen for it as opposed to feel it vibrating. I hardly get any notifications tho.
- Comment on Time to chop wood 3 days ago:
I’m in the US and I recently paid for a car with a cashier’s check as well. I was tipped off by the salesman. Evidently at that dealer they charge you a service fee for paying with a card or similar method. Paying by cash or check incurred zero fees.
- Comment on Time to chop wood 3 days ago:
How have you never seen a check at 30? I’m also 30 and I receive checks now and then, and I used to occasionally have to write them. At least here in the US, most jobs give you a paper check for your first check when you just started for some reason instead of that one going to your direct deposit. I also on occasion get a refund check of some sort in the mail.
- Comment on A totally normal figure of cancer signaling pathways 3 days ago:
Actually that part is a legitimate classification and not part of the AI nonsense. Broadly, lung cancers are classified as either “small cell” cancers or “non small cell” cancers based on how the tumor appears microscopically. The “non small cell” cancers can be further subdivided into various types.
The reason for this distinction between the two is due to the significant difference in clinical management and prognosis. Having “small cell” lung cancer is effectively a death sentence, whereas the other types are a lot more treatable.
- Comment on Dunkin' added achievements to their mobile app 4 days ago:
I’m not Olympian by any means, but this makes me feel a bit better about my running. I’ve never really run before but I have been trying to do it semi consistently since March. For whatever reason, while I’ve been able to run longer and longer distances, I never seem to be able to run much faster. I tried a couple of times the other week and I almost threw up after one of them lol. I think I’m just going to have to accept that I’m a slow runner!
- Comment on The cost of college in USA makes no sense anymore 6 days ago:
There are certain degree paths where it will net you a specific career path. The healthcare field is very particular about the specific degree/certification/licensure you have. In that regard, schooling makes sense for those.
- Comment on If you're not attracted to anyone "in your league", but you cannot choose who you are attracted to, then what are you supposed to do? 1 week ago:
Right. I was using dramatics to make a point. I’m not attracted to “normal” people. I lack the ability. I can’t choose it and I understand it’s stupid.
- Comment on If you're not attracted to anyone "in your league", but you cannot choose who you are attracted to, then what are you supposed to do? 1 week ago:
Not really. Minimal sexual attraction very occasionally. With is more than the 0 ever attraction to people I meet irl.
- Comment on If you're not attracted to anyone "in your league", but you cannot choose who you are attracted to, then what are you supposed to do? 1 week ago:
I don’t think you guys are understanding. I cannot force myself to be attracted to “personality”. It doesn’t work that way for me. I absolutely wish I could. I understand that it’s “shallow”.
I don’t “lust” for anyone… especially not porn stars. I have the opposite problem that you’d think. I have a significantly reduced capacity for attraction compared to other people. I talk about celeb appearances because they are just barely able to register on my radar.
- Comment on If you're not attracted to anyone "in your league", but you cannot choose who you are attracted to, then what are you supposed to do? 1 week ago:
No, I don’t think there is a hierarchy anyone has to stay within. I am simply not attracted to 99% of people. The 1% I am are ultra attractive and thus not attractive to me or other “regular” people. I wish I could force myself to be attracted to others but I just can’t.
- Comment on If you're not attracted to anyone "in your league", but you cannot choose who you are attracted to, then what are you supposed to do? 1 week ago:
I think you all are misunderstanding my question. I tried to phrase it in a general way so that it could potentially apply to other people. But you all are misinterpreting what I am saying.
I am absolutely not saying that I’m ugly. I am somewhat average looking to maybe slightly below average looking. I don’t generally like to admit any of the following out loud because I don’t like to brag. But I am fit, nice, funny, well liked, and have a very good job making good money.
There are plenty of people that look “regular” like me. “Regular” people seem to be attracted to me. I am only attracted to ultra attractive people. Ultra attractive people are not the norm and are an outlier. It doesn’t matter how much “personality” someone has for me. It doesn’t make me attracted to them. I have been on dates with sweet, caring, funny, normal people like me. I don’t have the capacity for attraction to them. I understand that it makes me “shallow”, but I cannot choose this attraction. Many times I wish I had the capacity to feel attraction to those around me, but I cannot.
- Comment on If you're not attracted to anyone "in your league", but you cannot choose who you are attracted to, then what are you supposed to do? 1 week ago:
While this is always good advice, some things just aren’t really changeable without cosmetic surgery. I have a good BMI and whatnot, but I’m definitely not a supermodel. But say you’re only attracted to supermodels for some stupid reason and you can’t fix that.
- Comment on If you're not attracted to anyone "in your league", but you cannot choose who you are attracted to, then what are you supposed to do? 1 week ago:
While nice of you to say, it’s not particularly realistic. Some dude from My 600 Lb Life is not dating Angelina Jolie unless there is something else going on.
- Submitted 1 week ago to [deleted] | 41 comments
- Comment on Morning Blast 2 weeks ago:
This is why I can’t be one of those people who drink their morning coffee at work instead of before work. Because then I’ll have to shit in public instead of at home and then I won’t have as much time to complete my work.
- Comment on I have a good feeling about this one. 2 weeks ago:
Congratulations, man! :)
- Comment on I never realized this 2 weeks ago:
Ah I didn’t know that! Interesting!
- Comment on I never realized this 2 weeks ago:
Ah ok yeah your first comment was sarcastic then haha
- Comment on I never realized this 2 weeks ago:
Maybe not quite, but iml it’s certainly leaps and bounds better that altering your identity entirely in submission of a partner.
- Comment on I never realized this 2 weeks ago:
Sorry I’m not understanding what you mean
- Comment on I never realized this 2 weeks ago:
I would think it would be just as weird to collectively switch to matronymic last names as a society. It would make more sense to me if couples just decided which name they liked better and went with that, be it coming from the man or woman. So a more even split of that sort of pattern is what I mean.
- Comment on I never realized this 2 weeks ago:
I think it varies with culture, but from my understanding, usually they take the first name of the two hyphens for their own marriage.
So you have John Doe and Jane Smith. They hyphenate their names as Doe-Smith and the children do as well.
Say they have a daughter Sally Doe-Smith who meets Tim Johnson-Star. So they marry and hyphenate their names as Johnson-Doe.
Yes, in examples like this, it still ends up as getting rid of the maternal aspect of it in the end…but the point is still that both parties are keeping part of and changing another part of their names. It’s not an all or nothing total switch of identity. The lineage is male, but the here and now is an equal compromise of identity.
- Comment on I never realized this 2 weeks ago:
Yeah I’ve always thought it was weird that women are supposed to give up their identity to a man to be married. I’m not really sure why hyphenated names aren’t as popular in the western world or why people don’t occasionally chose to take the woman’s name. I know that women don’t have to change their names, but then often you’ll have the kids as the same name as the father anyway but not the mother. So I’ve heard many women say that they did it so their kids would share their last name.
Hell, I don’t even like my father. But my name is who I am and I like it.
- Comment on Happy New Year! Thought I'd share my new year's resolution to the people here 2 weeks ago:
I hear you there. BUT the only time I think resolutions beyond 1080p actually do make sense is in a computer monitor. When you sit super close to something like that, lower resolutions are more obvious. I have a 23 inch 1080p monitor that I use in my setup. To me, text and whatnot has always felt a bit “blurry” and dissatisfying compared to my 13 inch 1080p laptop screen at the same viewing distance.
On a TV setup, the average person sits much too far away to notice a difference in 1080p vs 4k. You have to be sitting only a few inches away to notice, like in a computer setup.
- Comment on SAD 2 weeks ago:
Thank you, same to you as well!
But yeah I do want to stress that this was just my personal experience. Other people who identify as asexual may have radically different experiences.
- Comment on [deleted] 2 weeks ago:
Wow this was me attempting to go to a work party several weeks back lol. Idk why social interaction has to be so stressful!!
- Comment on SAD 2 weeks ago:
I’ve never “stopped” getting horny because I never started to begin with. Like I said, it was confusing growing up when my peers would experience that and talk about that and I couldn’t relate. I know that if you experience a sudden decrease/lack of libido even though you once experienced it, it is often a symptom of depression. But that’s not how it worked in my case. That’s just how I’ve always been. And still others assumed I was just a “late bloomer”. Again no. Early on I suppose one could postulate that but I’m now 30 lol. My body went through the normal changes of puberty at a normal age too so everything seems to be fine in that department!
I wouldn’t know what intense sexual desire feels like, so I don’t know how I would be able to compare said desire to anything else like you describe. I will say I have absolutely never been a passionate person about anything. So it’s interesting to me when I stumble across someone who describes their passion for their career or a particular hobby or etc. I have not ever really experienced that. I have likes and dislikes, but not so much passions.
I am more than capable of experiencing other types of emotions tho…happiness and sadness are ones that I have the ability to feel very strongly depending on the scenario. Moreso than others to the point where it gets me in trouble sometimes honestly.
- Comment on Satisfaction Guaranteed- Get Yours Today! 2 weeks ago:
Amazing. One of my friends would definitely die lmao
- Comment on Stop wasting money on shrinks and drugs - read this book 2 weeks ago:
If we’re going to get real for a second, I just wanted to complain a bit.
I get that therapy is so heavily advocated for and seen as the catch all nowadays, but the mental health field itself (at least in the US, not sure about every country) needs a total overhaul. At this point I have spoken to maybe like 5-6? different therapists.
At no point did any of these people offer anything useful to me. Most simply acted like ChatGPT…repeating what I said back to them without saying anything of much substance. Then there was one who was consistently 30 minutes late to every single session (4-5?) I had with her. Once or twice, sure I get it…but good fucking lord have at least some respect for the client. Then there was another therapist who seemed to want to get a bit more practical about things, but kept downplaying any issues I have with my cunt supervisor because she didn’t commit r**e or murder, so what she did and the way it made me feel didn’t matter. And then there are others who utilize certain methodologies where they try to teach you that all of your thoughts and feelings are invalid and wrong…as if the only way to exist as a functional being in society is to be born a different person.
In all this, the constant feedback I hear from people is…well…you just didn’t click with that one or that one is a shitty therapist. Keep trying and you’ll find one out there that will help!
Therapy is not cheap and not always even easy to schedule. And then going through so many shitty ones when you’re already mentally drained enough to need therapy is just even more disheartening and mentally draining.
The point I’m getting at is not necessarily that all mental health is bunk. But I am fortunate enough to have had the means to spend multiple hundreds upon hundreds (thousands) of dollars on this ultimately unhelpful and frustrating journey. Many others are not so financially fortunate.
If I can have a sample size of 5-6 random therapists and they are all literal trash, then the mental health field is not outputting what they should be outputting.
It’s like I have a broken ankle and I have to go to 5 separate hospitals…yet none of the hospitals know how to fix it. So instead of trying even more hospitals, I just end up hobbling on a broken ankle which will heal mal-aligned because it’s too much time, effort, and money to continue with what seems like a futile task.
This wouldn’t be acceptable in the field of medicine, but it somehow is in the mental health care. I don’t at all know how to fix the mental health field, but I know that it isn’t at all where it should be.