Bottle of water. Wash with hand.
Clean butt
Submitted 1 day ago by cm0002@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.ml/pictrs/image/8202d4f9-4538-4464-b597-020fd9221bc2.jpeg
Comments
Tattorack@lemmy.world 7 hours ago
Doctor_Satan@lemm.ee 18 hours ago
“Hey, if some caked-up mud pie got on your face, would you just wipe it off with a dry piece of tissue and call it a day? No! You’d wash it. So why is your butthole any different?” - Detective Allen Gamble, ‘The Other Guys’
uniquethrowagay@feddit.org 13 hours ago
My butthole is very different from my face and I hope that is true for everyone else as well
Shardikprime@lemmy.world 7 hours ago
Lip skin is the same as butthole skin
Be kind
Bidet and wipe
StJohnMcCrae@slrpnk.net 13 hours ago
Different enough that you don’t mind having shit smeared all around it?
Omgboom@lemmy.zip 1 day ago
Bidets are amazing. If you don’t have one you should go buy one, they start fairly low priced
garbagebagel@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Paid $50 for mine like 7 years ago. Is it fancy? Heck no. Does it clean my butt real good? Heck yes.
When I can afford a fancy heated, air drying bidet that will be my goalpost of success.
SuperSaiyanSwag@lemmy.zip 9 hours ago
I honestly got used to the regular temp one. So much so that when I moved and the new house came with the fancier bidet, I just ended up using regular water every time.
Botzo@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I started with a $30 cheapo 10 years ago and it was life changing. Last year I got a stupid expensive one. Like, has a night light, auto flush (because I got the matching toilet), auto lid, heated seat, heated water, deodorizer, wireless remote, etc. (Toto S7A)
Just so you’re prepared, the air dry doesn’t fully replace the pat dry entirely unless you’re gonna sit there for a good long time.
That said, I have no regrets.
agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
smol_beans@lemmy.world 12 hours ago
If I got shit on my arm I would wash it with soap, there’s no soap in a bidet so I don’t get this argument
xx3rawr@sh.itjust.works 4 hours ago
But with a bidet, you do have an option with soap since it can be rinsed (which I believe is the norm in my poor ass country, be it bidet or good ol’ dipper). I don’t normally wipe soap with a tissue.
Korhaka@sopuli.xyz 19 hours ago
I don’t know about you but I don’t wipe my anus on my face or use it to pick up food. No judgement though.
SuperSaiyanSwag@lemmy.zip 9 hours ago
But I sit on my couch and bed, where I sometimes lay. I know there is a layer of clothing, but sweat is a thing.
agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works 16 hours ago
Me either, but I would still prefer it to be clean.
some_dude@lemm.ee 11 hours ago
Do you ever have someone’s face near your junk?
besmtt@lemmy.world 1 day ago
🤌
WoodScientist@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
Why is my ass always itching?
Because you don’t wash it, you dumbass.
MisterFrog@lemmy.world 2 hours ago
Do people not wash daily? This seems like a general hygiene issue, and not that closely correlated with bidet use.
Source: I have never used a bidet, and my butt does not itch, ya know, because I wash daily?
7toed@midwest.social 18 hours ago
Reading this on a toilet without a bidet :(
Please send your prayers
TheRealLinga@sh.itjust.works 17 hours ago
Thought and prayers 🙏
B4kst33n@lemmy.world 20 hours ago
So, maybe I’m missing something here, but bidets don’t seem all that great? Everyone on the internet is always proclaiming life changing experiences with these things. However, when I recently used them they don’t seem to do very much. My butthole is still poopy and when I wipe to dry my ass the toilet paper tears.
StJohnMcCrae@slrpnk.net 13 hours ago
Operator error.
Shardikprime@lemmy.world 7 hours ago
Clearly needs more hydro pressure
swampdownloader@lemmy.dbzer0.com 16 hours ago
Some are better than others in both power and nozzle angle/placement. Sometimes you have to shimmy to get the angle just right if the power is low. It should result in a wipe in which no fecal matter remains, only wetness, if executed properly.
fishy@lemmy.today 15 hours ago
Exactly. There’s a learning curve but once you’ve got it, you dread wipe only bathrooms. Installed a bidet on one of my toilets six months ago and now that’s the only toilet anybody in the house poops in unless it’s already occupied.
bluewing@lemm.ee 18 hours ago
You need to use the power washer setting. Takes the paint right off the wall…
VitoRobles@lemmy.today 7 hours ago
I was like you a few years ago.
The crappy ones feel like that.
Then I sat on a fancy one that sang me a lullaby and gave me positive encouragement as I pooped. My god, my entire butthole is so fresh.
I now understand.
LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.dbzer0.com 19 hours ago
Low water pressure maybe? Mines a real cheap one and I’ve never had issues with not being clean after. I do usually get stronger toilet paper, but I only use a roll or two a month. I wouldn’t say it’s life changing, but I do prefer it. Also has saved me a lot on tp
Piemanding@sh.itjust.works 18 hours ago
Yes and also mine takes 30+ seconds to properly clean so make sure you take your time.
frezik@midwest.social 18 hours ago
I like the bidet’s we have at home, but I don’t get the ones that are separate from the toilet. Saw this type when visiting San Juan, PR once. Their plumbing system can’t handle toilet paper very well, so it’s all bidets with a stack of washed towels.
Not only do they take up extra space in the bathroom, but are you supposed to waddle over to this thing with a dingleberry hanging out?
The one argument I’ve heard in their favor is from people with vaginas who don’t like the idea of the built-in sprayer catching bits of poop that’ll get in their cootch.
Scrollone@feddit.it 16 hours ago
“people with vaginas”, what a world we’re living in
some_dude@lemm.ee 11 hours ago
A world with people? With vaginas?
ArtemisimetrA@lemm.ee 11 hours ago
Not all vagina-havers are women is the point you seem to be missing.
60d@lemmy.ca 1 day ago
An actual shit post lol
doug@lemmy.today 1 day ago
Bidet with a quiet-close toilet seat 🧑🍳💋
Mobiuthuselah@lemm.ee 1 day ago
Wiping like a pleb when you travel and slamming the seat.
Botzo@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Auto lid, auto flush checking in.
Yes, I’m spoiled.
Elkot@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Had my first experience of a bidet in Japan but not just that, the toilet seat was heated too, that was my first dump after landing
bluewing@lemm.ee 18 hours ago
That’s what I love about mine. Automatic lid raise and lower as you walk in, heated ring and water, (both adjustable temp), air dry, (again heated), and charcoal filtered air filtration to minimize the stench from that drive through burrito.
It’s the posh life. Very nearly the equal to having your own chamberlain.
leftover@lemm.ee 16 hours ago
Humm, I see you enjoy Toto. The king of home Bidets!
Teppichbrand@feddit.org 1 day ago
This is from a German shop but I’m sure you’ll find this everywhere. It’s dirt cheap and or family uses it daily for years.
kameecoding@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I think this is better than whats mounted into the toilet, because well sooner or later you get one of those days when shit flies everywhere and then enjoy cleaning the nozzle, meanwhile these things are usually just attached to the side of the toilet pr to the wall and no danger of it getting shit on barring extreme circumstances
LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.dbzer0.com 19 hours ago
Even the cheap ones have a self clean setting. It just sprays water down the nozzle, and is between on and off. Turn it to that for a second and then off. Never had an issue. When I clean the toilet I use the same brush to glance over it, but really it stays clean on its own
lewdian69@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
If it’s tapped directly into the ice cold water line that sounds terrible. Gotta save up and spring for ceramic instant water heating.
And009@lemmynsfw.com 23 hours ago
Plastic doesn’t rust, sometimes it’s better.
CanadianCarl@sh.itjust.works 21 hours ago
Well you could hire a maid, and they pour toilet bowl cleaner onto it. Even after you told them not to. Now the plastic is eaten away, and you have to replace it.
Doctor_Satan@lemm.ee 18 hours ago
This is the kind I have, and I will never not have one again.
pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
My friend has one of those Japanese ones. It also has a warmed toilet seat. When I came out, I said that seat is amazing and they said people never come out of there. I proposed that they were napping on the seat. Why do seat warmers feel so good? The thing is, I could never figure out how to make the actual bidet part work. I suspect the people who took a long time were also trying to test it out, but didn’t know how. Or maybe they did and enjoyed it?
9point6@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Japanese toilets are so far beyond what we’re doing anywhere else in the world it’s not even funny
Wtaf have our toilet scientists been doing for the last century in the western world?
RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Trying to get people to sit the right way on the toliet.
DJDarren@sopuli.xyz 1 day ago
It’s as easy as using two shells.
get_the_reference_@midwest.social 13 hours ago
Thanks a lot you shit-brained, fuck-faced, ball breaking, duck fucking pain in the ass.
Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 1 day ago
What’s the third one for
pelespirit@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
I remember it being a meme, but I couldn’t remember which one. For the uninformed like me: knowyourmeme.com/memes/three-seashells
QuantumSparkles@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
Mom, dad, I’m gay. Also that heated toilet seat is amazing.
MyDogLovesMe@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I’ve brought bidets awesomeness in groups before.
It is immediately apparent who is “in the club” and who is not.
recently_Coco@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 day ago
Me
Norgoroth@lemmy.world 19 hours ago
I love spraying flecks of poo all over the handle so the next guy touches my poo flecks, very euro sanitary
7toed@midwest.social 18 hours ago
Ew its a bidet, not an enema dude
ikidd@lemmy.world 1 hour ago
Not with that attitude, it isn’t.
psx_crab@lemmy.zip 19 hours ago
Skill issue.
null@slrpnk.net 17 hours ago
How would you even manage to do that?
Norgoroth@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
When you spray your asshole with a high pressure stream of water it sends flecks of poo into the air
Kolonel_Kahlua@lemmy.world 1 day ago
get_the_reference_@midwest.social 13 hours ago
I went to paper high school, then baby wipes college. Let me know when you get your PhD from bidet university, then we’ll talk.
Kolonel_Kahlua@lemmy.world 12 hours ago
This. This one right here. I upvoted.
Mobiuthuselah@lemm.ee 1 day ago
Stop kidding yourself
Kolonel_Kahlua@lemmy.world 12 hours ago
Missed opportunity on “Stop skidding yourself”.
Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
Amateur hour.
raod_guitar@feddit.org 1 day ago
I’m using one of those hand squeezer bidets and yes, it’s great. Ever wiped your ass until it was sore? That’s because some little shit pebbles refuse to get out. With a bidet you can shoot those motherfuckers directly out of your rectum.
wanderwisley@lemm.ee 1 day ago
Remember you don’t have to clean your whole ass. You just have to clean your ass’s hole.
pacology@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Why are you using a French dude in the pictures when everyone knows they don’t use bidets?
papalonian@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I was literally getting my ass sprayed when I opened this meme.
theunknownmuncher@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Clean butt club!
Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Not pictured: the wet spot on the back of their pants.
Seriously, how do bidet enjoyers dry their asses?
benignintervention@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Am
Olhonestjim@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Soon. Soon.
random_character_a@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Bidet causes vampirism?
MajesticElevator@lemmy.zip 1 day ago
Anyone got bidets to recommend (full toilets or kit to install on top of current toilets)?
kruhmaster@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
fuck yeah
MedicPigBabySaver@lemmy.world 13 hours ago
I got onboard the bidet train during the Covid lockdown. Simple to add on at my apartment. It was my #1 request when I moved to my GF’s house. We replaced the whole toilet with the upgrades.
GladiusB@lemmy.world 8 hours ago
Yup. Same. Feels way better. It’s just like taking a shower after every dump.
MedicPigBabySaver@lemmy.world 7 hours ago
Yay, bidet!