How often is normal to masturbate?

Comments

• neidu3@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Username checks out

  source

  • treadful@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Never would have expected a “30 something woman” to be behind that username.

    source

    • CumshotCurator@fedinsfw.app ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I mean my husband and I have been sharing links to cumshot porn with each other for over a decade. But I get it. Not your average 30 something woman’s username 😆

      source

      • -> View More Comments
    • velma@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Have you seen the type of books 30 something women consume?

      We be horny out here.

      source

      • -> View More Comments
    • arcine@jlai.lu ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      30-something is a lot younger than most people realise x)

      source
    • quick_snail@feddit.nl ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Women’s libido typically peak around 30, so usually when you find hypersexual women they’re in their 30s.

      source

      • -> View More Comments
  • CumshotCurator@fedinsfw.app ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Heh, well its the main reason I “cum” here, especially on Fridays.

    source

    • velma@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I’ve appreciated your posts a time or two myself. I’d say my usual is every other day, but I’d also say you’re totally normal with your frequency as well.

      Women’s sex drives tend to rise as we age. Enjoy the ride!

      source

      • -> View More Comments
• LillyPip@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  As long as it isn’t interfering with your life, flick that bean. It’s not hurting anyone.

  You don’t need to compare yourself to others. They’re not you. Twice a day doesn’t sound excessive to me. 20 times a day might, but twice? It’s your body.

  Also keep in mind female masturbation has, until recently, been discouraged by western culture as deviant until fairly recently. It may be that some of your friends are downplaying their own regularity for social pressure (you already mentioned you vocally agree with what they say – others are probably doing that, too).

  I do it every month or so for the dopamine, but I’m asexual. I’d say even a few times every day is fine. If you think it’s disruptive to your life, I’d recommend therapy, but that’s like if you can’t focus in a meeting because you haven’t done it for an hour and that’s all you can think about. Otherwise, just enjoy yourself. You’re fine.

  source

  • CumshotCurator@fedinsfw.app ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Thank you for your thoughtful reply. For me it is between 2 and 4 times a day depending on several factors. It definitely isn’t disruptive, I just wanted to gauge what is normal for me against others.

    source

    • LillyPip@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I think everything is normal that is natural for you and isn’t disruptive.

      Sorry for the Reddit link, and I don’t know your age, but you may find this discussion in the psychologyofsex sub interesting.

      ‘Normal’ is a very wide range.

      source

      • -> View More Comments
    • BlaestEgnen@feddit.dk ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Normal is between once a month to multiple times a day.

      For males there’s some health benefits related to unloading the balls twice a week, reduced risk of prostate cancer. I’m not aware of studies focused on the topic for females, so that’s more of unknown ground today

      source

      • -> View More Comments
• diablicja@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Have you considered that the friends might be insincere about their own frequency too? In many societies masturbation is considered shameful. Even when people admit they do it, they might not want you to think they do it “too much”.

  source

  • HubertManne@piefed.social ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    what? I never!

    source
• OldQWERTYbastard@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  As a married man, more than I would like to. My wife has wonky hormones and she’s only in the mood right after her period. The doctor has me on bi-weekly testosterone shots that I stretch out into 4 weeks because they make me all horned up. It sucks when you can’t get somewhere to take care of that distracting urge.

  Working with attractive young women doesn’t help either. Dear God I don’t know what happened. Suddenly I feel like you creepy old dude.

  I’m grossing myself out.

  source

  • CumshotCurator@fedinsfw.app ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Haha well if it is any consolation I also work with several attractive people of both male and female genders, and it is very distracting when I am in the office, low rise short skirts on the ladies and tight gym attire on the men seems to be the current trend. And it is very eye catching.

    I’m interested in the testosterone, is the effect both physical and psychological for you?

    source

    • OldQWERTYbastard@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago

      Definitely more psychological.

      source

      • -> View More Comments
  • quick_snail@feddit.nl ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Family bathrooms work as a safe place to wring one out.

    source
• Nima@leminal.space ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  42 year old female. every day or every other day for me. and sometimes multiple times per day.

  i feel that I didn’t really take off until I was in my 30s, honestly. and after then its been like I am now.

  but I feel quite normal. so I’m sure its normal for you too, Miss Curator!🙏

  source
• rizzothesmall@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  As much as you want to is normal. Suppressing your libido to fit in is not normal.

  source

  • cecinestpasunecommunication@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    It is normal, its just fucked up and unhealthy.

    source

    • Fawkes@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Hey peeps, I’m pretty sure they’re reacting to the SECOND “normal” statement, not the first.

      source

      • -> View More Comments
• southsamurai@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Well, if you mean normal as a synonym for typical or common, then a couple of times a week is where most adult, premenopausal women sit. Or, those that were willing to take part in surveys, which could skew things.

  If you mean normal as a synonym for healthy, then normal is whatever frequency meets your sexual needs without interfering with the rest of your life.

  Women tend to masturbate more as an enhancement of their sex life, supposedly (I didn’t do the studies, so I can only say so much). Which means that you might masturbate more often when having a satisfying sex life with partners. Men tend to have an upper limit to ejaculation frequency that tops out with a couple of times a day for most men before they can’t get an erection; the body just says nope and takes a rest. Three, maybe four ejaculations is where the average guy can crank some out, and most can’t sustain that every day.

  Mind you, men can orgasm without ejaculation! But it ain’t easy to learn.

  Women tend to be limited more by sensitivity and friction. The tissues of vulvae, vaginas, and clitorises gets abraded at some point, and with the elevated sensitivity brought on by orgasm, the typical woman is going to hit a similar limit as men in terms of sessions, but a higher number of orgasms may be involved per session. But! Those tissues recover quickly, so women are usually able to sustain their preferred frequency no matter how many a day it is, as the next day will have things back to typical conditions (again, on average).

  So, if you’re an every day kinda gal, don’t worry. You’re within known boundaries of frequency. As long as it isn’t messing with the rest of your life, have fun and let the other people think what they will.

  source

  • CumshotCurator@fedinsfw.app ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Thank you for taking the time to reply ❤️ it’s good to know I am not that far above the bell curve

    source
• AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  From what I gathered, it’s weird if you don’t stop for food, or in public. Other than that it’s more or less normal.

  source

  • blargh513@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    So I go to my doctor and he says, “you know you really need to stop masturbating so much”. I ask, “why, I thought it was a normal habit?” He says, “you need to stop because I can’t clean your teeth like this!”

    source

    • gramie@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      doctor Clean your teeth Hmmm. Something isn’t adding up for me. I think the joke works much better if it’s your dentist!

      source
• AnarchistArtificer@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  29 year old woman. A few times a week, on average, I’d say. Potentially multiple times in a day.

  When I have a partner, I tend to do it way less though, because I find that the sex is way better if I refrain from masturbating. Orgasms from masturbation aren’t particularly satisfying for me unless I try to do a whole build up that I rarely have the time or energy for.

  Worth mentioning that autism makes my general sensory experience pretty weird — I’m hypersensitive to most stimuli, and that also affects touch. This feeds into my above preferences in complex ways.

  I also have a few physical disabilities that mean I’m less likely to be able to enjoy sexual pleasure as much unless I’m in the right mindset (i.e. chronic pain can distract from the physical pleasure).

  It’s possible that you’re ahead of the curve when it comes to knowing what you like. I had a friend who was capable of reaching orgasm through masturbation, but it took so much effort that she rarely did it. Then she had a partner who helped her to figure out her own idiosyncratic preferences in terms of what she needed to reach orgasm, and that sparked a period where she “felt like a teenage boy” with how often she was masturbating. She was 32 at this point.

  I have another friend who didn’t even orgasm until she was 31 due to only having dated guys who were stereotypical straight dudes, which had calibrated her bar of what to expect super low (not just in what she expected from partners, but in terms of what sexual pleasure could feel like in general).

  Another friend didn’t masturbate at all until she was 28 (with the exception of some occasional pillow humping that she would feel tremendous shame about) due to religious trauma.

  Unfortunately, the society we live in doesn’t really equip women well to be able to come to understand our bodies and communicate our sexual needs. A lot of my friends in their 30s (especially the women) have said that they’re loving their 30s way more than their 20s because of this kind of thing. 30 is still relatively young, so maybe (likely in addition to a naturally higher libido) you just have figured out what you like sooner than your friends have. Maybe some of them are yet to have an awakening of some sort, and the average rate of masturbation will be higher in a few years.

  source

  • CumshotCurator@fedinsfw.app ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Thanks! Many of my female friends have also said they they started masturbating later than I did, some into their 30s. I am very lucky to have always been able to reach orgasm really easily and quickly and have been genuinely shocked in the past when female friends have talked about difficulty in reaching climax.

    source
• arcine@jlai.lu ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I don’t think “normal” is a helpful frame of mind here. Maybe “healthy” is a better way to see it : does it make you feel good ? Does it feel like a healthy part of your life ? I don’t want to decide for you, but from your other comments it seems like it probably is.

  I would call it a problem if it becomes an obsession, if it takes time away from other things you want to do, if you do it so much you hurt yourself… Etc.

  source
• ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  If it does not interfere with your life, then it’s not a problem.

  Might be a hot take, but:

  • Sex is completely normal and natural.
  • Most of the sex addiction discourse is astroturfed by christian fundamentalists.
  • Most of the sex addiction stories I’ve read so far is just people wishing their life back before they had those weird urges, that came at a time they’re way too immature for them mentally.
  • Unless you’re some variant of asexual, you will have sexual needs. They’re hardwired into you. Please them as long as
    • the way of pleasing them won’t harm you,
    • it doesn’t violate someone’s consent.
  • The “grindset” is toxic, people should work less than 40 hours/week by this point, not 100 hours. The problem isn’t too much time for sex but rather not enough time for it.

  source
• harambe69@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I’m pooped if I do it more than once every 2-3 days. Sometimes go for weeks without. Guy btw. But then, we have to reload. Seems fair that people without a reload timeout should masturbate more often.

  source

  • Scrogu@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    It doesn’t take 2-3 days to reload normally.

    source

    • harambe69@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Physically? True. Mentally? I need that long to gather enough horny energy.

      source

      • -> View More Comments
  • Soulcreator@programming.dev ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Yes. This is my habit as well. I feel weird for the opposite reason as OP as I’m a guy who doesn’t do it daily if not several times a day. I guess I could technically, but do I really have the time and energy for it?

    source
• dregan@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I’m a guy, but yeah, often several times per day. Occasionally none. I’d say you’re fairly normal.

  source

  • Prathas@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    How do you do several? Doesn’t it hurt after one to especially three times?

    source

    • PhoenixDog@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      If it hurts at all, see a doctor.

      source

      • -> View More Comments
    • Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      not really, maybe if you do multiple days in a row with 5 sessions each

      source

      • -> View More Comments
    • Lumisal@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Are you circumcised? That might be why it hurts you? I don’t think it’s supposed to hurt after only one time

      source

      • -> View More Comments
    • quick_snail@feddit.nl ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Use oil.

      source
    • BlaestEgnen@feddit.dk ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Do you get dry or how do you feel the pain?

      source

      • -> View More Comments
• osanna@lemmy.vg ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  When I was a teenager and early 20s, a few times a day, tbh. but rarely anymore :/ I am a bit of an old codger though. So maybe that explains it?

  source
• paranoia@feddit.dk ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Usually 1 or 2 times a day, more often 1.

  source

  • CumshotCurator@fedinsfw.app ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Has it been fairly constant at that amount? Or has it changed over time?

    source

    • Whirling_Ashandarei@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Not the guy you replied to but at a similar cadence and age: definitely down. Teenage me could do 7/8 but minimum of 3 usually. 20s I would usually still be in the 3-5 range depending on work, now 1-2. All of those with the caveat that if I was having sex I was masturbating less bc sex lasts longer and is more satisfying, but it didn’t cut it entirely, which it can now (but not always).

      source
    • paranoia@feddit.dk ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Pretty much constant. When I was younger and had nothing to do, could sometimes do it more. I basically never have so little to do anymore though.

      source
    • BurgerBaron@quokk.au ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      1-2 times a day has been typical from puberty to age 26 now, never changed lol.

      source
• Bubbaonthebeach@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Enough to take the edge off, not so often it interfers with your life. The number will be different for every person and different at every stage of life for a person.

  source
• Kazumara@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I think it averages out to once a day, maybe once and a half.

  On weekdays mostly in the evening, sometimes in the morning. On the weekends often twice a day. Sometimes three or even four a day, but that happens only if I’m using toys, just manually it feels a bit raw after two.

  32, male, happily single.

  source

  • ThirdConsul@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    That was me during my teenage years.

    Now my libido lowered.

    I do wonder if yours did too, because if yes, damn, I apparently might have a stat on which I ought to catch up ;-)

    source
• schnurrito@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Once a day on average, early 30s male. Has been that way forever for me.

  source
• GreenKnight23@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  personally, 3-4 times a day.

  that’s mostly because the world is going to shit and I need that dopamine boost.

  source

  • Aneb@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Good hit of my weed pen and I’m masterbating for hours, not continuous, when I get off there’s a cool down time where I watch TV and then switch back and resume.

    source
• blarghly@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  30 something guy here.

  I oscillate. Usually somewhere between once every 2 days and 3x/day.

  However, I’ve noticed that I feel almost no urge to masturbate when I spend a lot of time in nature - eg, on long backpacking trips. My theory is that - while there is nothing really wrong with masturbation - what is actually happening is that I am masturbating to counteract the stress of modern life. If I feel tired or lonely or anxious or sad, my brain knows it can feel happy chemicals just by beatin’ the ol’ bishop.

  In this way, it feels similar to hunger. Sometimes I eat because I need food. But the vast majority of the time, I eat because I feel a compulsion to make myself feel good by eating.

  So it might be worth considering if your desire of masturbate is coming from actual horniness, or a desire for some form of enjoyable escape from the moment you are in.

  source

  • CumshotCurator@fedinsfw.app ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Interesting take, and logical. I actually get more horny if I go camping or hiking, especially if I’m not alone.

    source
  • totoro@slrpnk.net ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    This is a really interesting take.

    I (male, mid thirties) stopped working for money about 1.5 years ago. Been traveling, often living off-grid, outside a lot since then. Very low stress levels, computer use has gone from about 11h per day to 4h per week.

    I’ve noticed a significant drop in libido. I used to masturbate maybe once every two/three days on average. Now it’s 2-4 times per month. Thought it might be me getting older, never had the idea it could be stress-related.

    source
• sqauffle@slrpnk.net ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Trans woman. My libido is less assertive when I’m on feminising hormones. I can kinda forget to and maybe only do it once every few days. Whenever I go off HRT for any reason and my T rises, my penis usually tells me what we’re going to do first thing in the morning and before bed.

  source
• Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Middle aged male. Depends on what’s going on in life. Usually once every couple of days. Sometimes go a couple of weeks or more without. Other times multiple shots per day.

  source
• IronKrill@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  20s male. Generally once per day but I find it’s easier and easier to forget and I sometimes go a week without thinking about it. I rarely if ever do 2. I’ve gotta cool down for 20 minutes between, which gives a lot of time to realise I should be doing something else.

  source
• agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  30 something male, average is 1-2 times a day. Some days it’s none, some days I get those demons in me. Down from 3-4 per day when I was younger, and some of those were deliberately prolonged sessions. Still do that now and then, but I’ve got shit to do most of the time.

  I am married, but her libido only really spikes once or twice a week so that doesn’t affect much. When I had multiple partners I almost never masturbated, but I was having sex multiple times per day, so.

  source
• tanisnikana@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I mean, I’m an asexual and sex-repulsed person, so I don’t get horny, let alone masturbate, ever.

  However, there are also men and women in this world that do that shit constantly.

  So I don’t know, anything between “never” and “constantly,” inclusive, is a normal amount.

  source

  • CumshotCurator@fedinsfw.app ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    That’s fair enough, I can’t imagine never being horny though, that’s crazy. Does it bother you?

    source

    • tanisnikana@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I’m intersex, and my bits don’t work, but most of the world caters to me, like grocery stores and traffic intersections and public parks. I don’t really take in a whole lot of advertising, so a lot of the sexual ads and content are something I never see.

      I thought I was horny once, but that was just Rush Limbaugh dying.

      Seriously though, I can’t imagine what is so interesting about sex that people would upend their homelives about it, and write 40% of all lyrical music about it. I’ve got a bit of money from not having kids, and I can pursue my photography career.

      In the end though, someone explained to me that horniness is the suspension of disgust: licking someone’s mouth, eating ass, stuff like that. My disgust never gets suspended, I’m not gonna eat ass. People poop from there.

      source

      • -> View More Comments
  • bizarroland@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I would say that any amount that does not interfere with your daily activities is a normal amount. If you’re skipping opportunities to hang out with friends or to go to events in order to stay home and masturbate, then you’re doing it excessively and you need to address it.

    Or if you have an actual sex life and your sex life is suffering because you masturbate so much that you don’t want to have sex, then I could see that being a problem.

    But, just like drinking, if everything is going well, and if you’re keeping it under control and you’re not damaging your interpersonal relationships with it, and you’re keeping your wits about you to a certain degree, then you’re perfectly fine to do it as much as feels reasonable to you and your own body’s drives.

    source
  • garbagebagel@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    This thread is strangely validating tbh. I’m ace and not sex repulsed, but people really out here being horny multiple times a day? Could never be me.

    source

    • tanisnikana@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Right? Same.

      And people being horny ever? Not me, I got shit to do.

      source
• HubertManne@piefed.social ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Some days I don’t do it but im getting old. Admitadely you need some privacy unless you are intentionally sharing the experience. I have used it to reduce pain with medical things and then it was a lot as it does not last all that long.

  source
• pyre@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I’d say everyone should either have sex or masturbate once a day. but the thought of multiple times a day feels exhausting. if you have the time and are happy with it though, don’t let peer pressure make you feel any bad. actually I’d push against my friends and say once a day confidently. maybe that’s what they’re missing in their lives. act like they’re the crazy ones. like why not?

  source
• Ardyssian@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  32M single, at least once a week. But there are periods where I get super horny and do the deed several days in succession (once per day, probably 3 days a week), these usually happen every 1-2 months.

  After seeing the replies here I wonder if my libido is lower than average.

  source
• quick_snail@feddit.nl ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  38 male. 1-3 times per day.

  It’s more commonly once per day as I get older, and the drop in libido is welcome. My partner only wants sex once per week, and she thinks I’m crazy.

  I wish I could find another partner with a higher libido, because it’s a strain on our relationship.

  source

  • velma@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I wish I could find another partner with a higher libido, because it’s a strain on our relationship.

    If once a week isn’t compromise enough, maybe you should be honest with her and find a higher libido partner. Once a week is still rather frequent but I understand that isn’t soothing when you are the one with the higher libido.

    (I saw this as the higher libido partner in my relationship)

    source

    • quick_snail@feddit.nl ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Oh, I’m honest. And I’m looking (we’re poly). But I haven’t found anyone. I’m also very picky…

      source

      • -> View More Comments
    • Colalextrast@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I just started looking throughthe thread, but the idea that once a week is fairly frequent is mind boggling for me. My wife and I started having sex only once a week post-baby, and its caused us to seek therapy…

      source

      • -> View More Comments
• RedGreenBlue@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Every day or every other day i would say is normal. Depending on time availability.

  source