blarghly
@blarghly@lemmy.world
- Comment on Non-stick pans? 3 hours ago:
You need to lift heavier
- blarghly
^ Show her this
- Comment on Non-stick pans? 9 hours ago:
I’ve had the best luck with cast iron, but my wife doesn’t like to use them because they’re heavy.
Tell your wife she needs to lift heavier
- Comment on why do rich people like marrying their cousins so much? 11 hours ago:
Iirc, two random cousins fucking has a small but non-negligible chance of creating a genetic issue - something like 1% chance. And at second cousins, your odds have essentially dropped to background levels. The problem arises when everyone in your family only fucks their cousins.
- Comment on bro got neutered 4 days ago:
Yeah, I think it is very noble, but… like…
I have this friend. Grew up poor. Parents divorced. Dad abused him. Mom was an alcoholic. But he made it out alive and got married to a girl. They live in the same podunk rust belt town they grew up in, working at walmart. They aren’t dumb. They aren’t lazy. But whenever they think about moving, its “oh, but I still have to take care of mom - her schizophrenia is flaring up again and her hoarding is getting out of control.” “gotta stick around for dad - he’s getting heart surgery and needs our support” “gotta help out my FIL, since he went senile and is now on the run from the law for looking at CP on the computer in between cancer treatments.”
I, meanwhile, graduated high school, walked out the door, and haven’t returned to my home town or seen my parents probably more than a dozen times since, and am much happier with my life.
- Comment on Anon likes a woman 6 days ago:
I mean, I would like first to make a point of order - “ghosting” is when someone who you already have an established relationship with stops responding to all messages. It doesn’t mean “someone you were interested in but had no significant relationship with simply lost interest”. For example, if you match with someone on a dating app, and then you exchange a few messages but they stop responding, they are not “ghosting” you - they have simply lost interest.
Anyway, if you have people on dating apps consistently losing interest with you, then it usually means that your problem is… nothing. The vast majority of OLD interactions go no where. This is fine. Most people arent a good match for each other. They might have found someone who is a better match for them, or they may have simply become exhausted with dealing with OLD.
Its like if you thought someone at a party was cute, and you went and had a convo with them, and then they went to get a drink and got drawn into another convo, and then you never saw them again. They didn’t “ghost” you. They aren’t being mean to you. They are just living their life, and you are not a major player in it, and that’s fine.
However, if you don’t like how conversations just peter off sometimes, you can significantly reduce this by seeking explicit rejections instead. Be clear about what you are looking for, and then pitch meeting up in person.
- Comment on Anon likes a woman 6 days ago:
D/s kink. Girl wants to “date up” - dating a guy who is superior to her. The guy she wants has lots of other options with women, and so is not very interested in her. So she has to work to win him over and prove that - even though she is average in every way (except for being smokin hot), actually deep down inside in some way that doesnt manifest in the real world at all, she is the most specialist girl in the whole wide world.
But she can only maintain this fantasy as long as he plays his role of not being interested in her until she has proved herself. In Anon’s case, he’s autistic, and so initially ignored her. Then his attempts at “flirting” were cold and stone-faced, showing he has only a small amount of interest but he still needs to be convinced. But then Anon broke the fantasy by asking her out before she had “proved” herself.
Anon’s biggest problem was not being attractive enough to have lots of other girls intersted in him so he would actually not care if this girl liked him. If he did this instead, he would both improve his odds with this girl without even trying, and also not care if she decided she actually didn’t like him.
- Comment on White nationalist group marches as US celebrates July 4 1 week ago:
This is the most schizophrenic news article…
- Comment on Why Does Everyone Seem Ahead of Me? ??? 1 week ago:
I find closing my eyes is helpful for focusing on the sensations, but if this would be weird or dangerous (eg, in the middle of a conversation or while driving), I will do my best without closing my eyes. Same with stopping what I am doing, etc. I feel like this technique has the greatest immediate effect when I can stop whatever I’m doing, sit down, and focus on the feeling entirely for an indefinite period of time. But I think the most important thing for long term progress is simply noticing the feeling in the moment and allowing yourself to feel it, even if just a little, for just a fraction of a second.
So to do it properly, I suggest not trying to do it properly. Just do it, but do it as consistently as possible.Then if you feel the urge, carve out 5 minutes per day or a couple times per day to specifically remember the feeling, and feel it uninterrupted.
- Comment on Why Does Everyone Seem Ahead of Me? ??? 1 week ago:
I mean, I think you more or less have it figured out, as you outlined in your post. Now you just need to do the work - whenever you feel the feeling of “I’m falling behind, its a disaster!” or “They have a new car and I don’t and I want it, its not fair!”, just take a moment (personally, I count 5 natural breaths as a convenient timer) to notice how the feeling actually feels. The physical sensations, the kinds of thoughts it brings up, the other emotions it brings up - be interested and curious about the feeling itself. The longer you can sit with the feeling like this - just feeling, noticing, being interested and curious - the more likely it is to feel heard and take its leave. And as you complete this practice over and over, the feeling is more likely to feel its mission is complete, and not come around to worry you.
- Comment on I am someone who works out daily and sweats a lot. Just doing laundry doesn't seem to adequately clean the underarms of my shirts. What are some ways to clean these areas of my clothing better? 1 week ago:
Getting in shape, all things being equal, makes you sweat more, not less, since you are training your body to sweat more in response to the greater thermic effect of more intense exertion.
- Comment on gooner bait 1 week ago:
Everyone in this comic is telling the truth. After all, is not the purpose of art a collaboration between the artist and the viewer?
- Comment on Mighty fine 1 week ago:
Hot take: separate beds are the way to go. You can push them together for more space if you want. But most of the time they are apart to facilitate sleeping.
And I like cuddling. I like falling asleep with someone in my arms. But I do not like 30 minutes later when my arm is asleep and I want to roll over, and then they are taking up 3/4 of the bed the whole night and are stealing the blankets. So: separate beds.
- Comment on Why are there so many more mtf trans vs ftm trans people?? 1 week ago:
Because only Americans are smart enough to make science…
- Comment on 1 week ago:
Or, I mean, simply having disposable cups. Disposable cups are quite common in developing nations as well - just look on the side of any highway. The only “American” thing about it is the ubiquity of the red color, which is simply a cultural phenomenon
- Comment on my fling and I are opposites but very compatible 1 week ago:
I mean, really, aren’t we all God’s children?
- Comment on Generational warfare 1 week ago:
- Comment on Anon tries to lose weight 1 week ago:
Yes, but also… bruh…
- Comment on Has anyone ever actually had their vehicle tabs stolen? 1 week ago:
Same in the US. My stack is nearly a mm thick. I imagin someone could steal them… but it would be faster to unscrew the whole plate and take it home to work on it
- Comment on 1 week ago:
Iirc, keeping or losing your hair as a guy has to do with DHT receptors in your hair follicles. T doesn’t make your hair fall out, but DHT does, and your body produces more DHT as you get older (hence why finastride works as a hair loss inhibitor - it blocks DHT from the receptors in your hair). But only the hair on the top of your head is sensitive to this, with sensitivity higher in some places than others. Hence, some guys bald on the crown first, while some have a receding hairline first, and some never bald at all.
- Comment on Age gap 2 weeks ago:
lol
- Comment on Age gap 2 weeks ago:
Lol. The ragebait worked. We have been sucked into the controversial topic.
As the other commenter noted, the problem isnt the age gap itself - it is the manipulation and abuse. Without that… I don’t see a problem. As an example, for a while I was casually seeing a girl who was 21 while I was 33. I communicated what I wanted, she communicated what she wanted, and we had a good time together. When she started seeing me, she had recently broken up with a bf who was the same age as me, and then after she broke things off with me (she wanted something more serious and I didn’t - but we’re still friends), she started dating a guy who was older than me. They seem happy together, and I hang out with them sometimes - but my point is, like, she had a type, lol
- Comment on Age gap 2 weeks ago:
Or it’s ragebait. Lots of people hate the idea of age gap relationships (see: OOP), so their hot takes drive engagement.
I was curious, so I did a little googling. I couldnt find either of their ages, but based on other pics, she looks like a woman in her 40s who has had some work done and who stays in shape. He, obviously, looks like a guy in his 40s or 50s who does not stay in shape or have work done. So there is maybe a 10 or so year age gap between them, which isnt unusual or controversial for people their age.
But also, she’s a reality tv star, and probably knows exactly what she is doing in this post, and is doing it to keep people aware of and engaged with her brand. This post is designed to bring out comment arguments about age gaps, sugar daddying, and having work done. Likely, she didn’t even make this post, but had it made by a social media manager.
- Comment on If you work with food, how can you control yourself so you don’t eat it? 2 weeks ago:
In any kitchen producing food at that scale, they are going to make huge amounts of food in bulk. Then the people they are feeding line up, and are handed plates of what they want to eat. At the end of the day, the pots or trays the food was served from are often still full of food. Partly because some people won’t like creamed corn or baked chicken or whatever. But mostly because at such a large scale, there is going to be a significant margin of error in how much food is produced and how much is consumed, and you always err on the side of making too much so that you don’t have any unhappy customers when you run out of something.
The manager of such a kitchen typically has the overall responsibility of ensuring everyone is fed, making hiring and firing descisions, and making purchasing descisions. They know the kitchen intentionally overproduces in order to have a safety buffer. And if this was all there was to it, they probably wouldn’t care if the kitchen staff ate what was left over in the serving trays after a meal.
The problem is that the kitchen staff get used to this benefit. They start expecting to be able to eat as much as they want of the best parts of every meal. They bring home huge trays of food that is left over, feeding themselves on their off-days as well, and possibly feeding their families. And this is still all fine from a food waste perspective - the problem is when kitchen staff start making 3 extra trays of chicken thighs “just in case”, to make sure there is enough left over for them to take home. Or when they grab the small serving spoon for the potato salad, so the people they are feeding get a smaller portion while the kitchen staff get a larger amount of leftovers. The manager’s incentive is to produce just enough food to feed all the customers with no leftovers (and accepts some leftovers as a buffer), while the kitchen staff’s incentive is to produce as much food as possible so they have as much leftovers as possible (while not becoming so excessive as to raise the manager’s suspicions).
Hence, management institutes some sort of rule about eating the food produced. What rule is implemented can vary. Some managers might decree that all kitchen staff can have one plate of food. Some might say it is fine to take home leftovers. And some might say (as in OP’s case) that eating any of the food is stealing.
- Comment on Finally an explanation 2 weeks ago:
90% of this thread: “nuh uh! I’m a good person and should be allowed to kill all those evil, bad cops and billionaire and nazis”
Also 90% of this thread: would piss their pants if given a gun and told to shoot another human being, no matter how evil they knew they were.
- Comment on Finally an explanation 2 weeks ago:
Edgy 14 year old logic
- Comment on Rate my daily breakfast 2 weeks ago:
Potato/potato
- Comment on Why can't I apply SPF50 sunscreen twice to get SPF100 protection? 2 weeks ago:
You get sunburned: “oh, silly me, I must have forgot to reapply”
Your baby gets sunburned and spends the next 72 hours crying: “I will murder the CEO of Johnson & Johnson”
- Comment on Finally an explanation 2 weeks ago:
No, you don’t get it: they’re a Good Person.
- Comment on Finally an explanation 2 weeks ago:
I think there do exist specific circumstances where people should be violently murdered. But if I’m able to talk to them on a public internet forum, it is almost certainly not that circumstance.
- Comment on Why are the two major American parties called what they are? 2 weeks ago:
TR '28!