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⁨89⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨SSUPII@sopuli.xyz⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://sopuli.xyz/pictrs/image/5c79425a-e510-4eaa-905d-437d1cf96148.webp

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  • CoffeeJunkie@lemmy.cafe ⁨1⁩ ⁨hour⁩ ago

    Green pill would be the best power, hands down, no contest. It would be a very, well, green superpower.

    Demolition jobs all around the country, regular houses cost $4-8 per square foot. Underbid & you get every job. Old warehouses? Poo. Toxic landfills? Poo. Asbestos? Poo. Old tech waste that’s processed for valuable metals first? Poo. Forever chemicals? Not anymore, poo. Radioactive nuclear waste that costs us $6B every year according to this? Get a government contract for $5B per year for 100+ years with unlimited paid travel/room/board for you & all your family, travel to all the storage sites & turn all the nuclear waste into poo. Travel the US. Travel the world! You’re the Poo Man. Eliminating radioactive nuclear waste & creating fertilizer. Everyone would pay top dollar for your fantastic services. Getting old, sick of earth? Go to the moon, go to Mars, Mars can use lots & lots of nutrient rich poo to help terraform in the future.

    There would be almost no limit to the amount of good you could do, with poo…yes, you can use it to rob banks. If you’re fucking dumb. Or you could legally shake down & radically transform the entire world, make them pay you & your descendants like kings, and if they’re smart they’ll thank you for your services. Poo Man. All day, every day, you’d be the richest man on earth (or Mars) & arguably super super ethical, too. Win-win.

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    • JusticeForPorygon@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨33⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

      You show up at the capitol to turn Congress into poo.

      It doesn’t work, because they’re already full of shit.

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    • iAvicenna@lemmy.world ⁨18⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

      Netanyahu? instant poo. Trump, Putin? Instant poo. Turn shitty humans to shit and cut the middle man.

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    • programmer_belch@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨59⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

      That’s pretty cool until CIA or another government intelligence kidnaps you to keep you inside a box converting everything you touch into poop, giving them an advantage against other countries

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      • wdx@feddit.org ⁨33⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

        turn the kidnappers into poo

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      • CoffeeJunkie@lemmy.cafe ⁨27⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

        Turn the box into poop! Turn all kidnappers to poop!

        That’s a good point. Idk you would probably have to have a robust security detail. Which you can afford, or probably again twist the arm of America to provide for you at taxpayer expense. 🙂 All things are negotiable.

        You can do so much good with that power, you’d be one of the best people to exist ever in the history of mankind. You’d simply have to use that power. For good.

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    • SSUPII@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨hour⁩ ago

      We already have lemmy.ca/post/865320

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  • Ravi@feddit.org ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Green pill = infinite money cheat. Turn all the plastic trash, nuclear waste etc. into bio mass

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    • MrMcGasion@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      You could go the evil route and become a hitman as well, or rather a shitman, turning your targets into poo.

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      • Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨hour⁩ ago

        I have a few people in mind. Nobody I know personally, though.

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      • LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Just need to keep your talent a secret. Put on your mask, grab a shovel, turn all the walls between you and the bank vault to shit, take what you need and leave. Cops come, the bullets/guns/cuffs police left feet to poo. Wash the money figuratively once done cleaning it literally, then figure out your next step.

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      • frog@feddit.uk ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Imagine Death Note replaced with this power instead.

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    • ivanafterall@lemmy.world ⁨55⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

      Unfortunately, it’s imprecise and now the ocean is literally just shit.

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  • python@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Black pill’s gonna have some mysterious side effects with my other medication Image

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  • Kolanaki@pawb.social ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    You literally already have the power of the green pill. Don’t take that one.

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    • CIA_chatbot@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      I have this power - I turned the entire Republican Party into shit and everything got WAY worse

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    • Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨hour⁩ ago

      But some of that stuff isn’t very pleasant to eat.

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    • abbadon420@sh.itjust.works ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      I’d love to see you turn cyanide into poo. Better act fast!

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      • SSUPII@sopuli.xyz ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Eat a bunch of apple seeds

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  • Steamymoomilk@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    When we say lifetime supply of thorium. Does it mean the receivers lifetime Or the thorium’s lifetime???

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    • AreaKode@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Is it lifetime or halflifetime?

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      • somerandomperson@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Half-life (thorium in the bg instead of…uhh…idk who the main character is)

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  • balderdash9@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨hour⁩ ago

    Turn anything into poo: turn plastic waste into manure/fertilizer. Millionaire pretty quick.

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  • individual@toast.ooo ⁨1⁩ ⁨hour⁩ ago

    I don’t understand the orange pill so I must need the black pill

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  • Johanno@feddit.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨hour⁩ ago

    Uhhmm eehhhh uhhhmmm

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  • interdimensionalmeme@lemmy.ml ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I would turn every star to poo

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    • frightful_hobgoblin@lemmy.ml ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      enough poo = black hole

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  • lena@gregtech.eu ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Green, I’d turn trump into poo

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  • cabron_offsets@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Green mang. Turn orange into brown nahmean?

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  • rustyfish@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    The black one. You know what? I take two, just to be sure.

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  • Una@europe.pub ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    blue :3

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  • Krauerking@lemy.lol ⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Purple! Dont even need to uhmmm… think… Uhhh… Hm.

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  • ieatpwns@lemmy.world ⁨4⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Orange and black

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  • Winter_Oven@piefed.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    What...will be the consistency? The answer will impact the uses I would have for the green pill.

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