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That kid was the WORST

⁨1232⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨ivanafterall@lemmy.world⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/d75bae72-a67f-4283-af31-36053ed927b0.jpeg

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  • Assassassin@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    More than anything he’d probably be enlightened by the fact that I like banging dudes too.

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    • Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Considering how horny I was at 14 I’d have been stoked to know there was even more sex I could have.

      Shame I not even a little bi.

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      • curbstickle@anarchist.nexus ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Shame I’m not even a little bi. (I checked.)

        Well as long as you did your due diligence, I’m sure no one will complain.

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    • EonNShadow@pawb.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Relatable lmfao

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    • ivanafterall@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Did he think he’d stop banging dudes when he got older?

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      • Assassassin@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        No, he didn’t realize that he totally wanted to

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  • samus12345@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Probably not, but the Steam Deck would blow his mind.

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    • ivanafterall@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I would’ve shat myself over VR and so many other things.

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      • TachyonTele@piefed.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        I would still shat myself over vr if i could ever play it

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    • Grimy@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      He would admire my game library, maybe even hate me for it. I wouldn’t tell him I don’t play any of them.

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  • tkk13909@sopuli.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Yeah I’m what my 14 y/o self never wanted to become and I’m fine with disappointing him lol

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  • Pudutr0n@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Look man, If I wanted to disappoint two people at once I’d take my parents out for dinner or find a couple of neurotypicals and have a threesome.

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    • ivanafterall@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      If dinner goes well enough with your parents, maybe you can kill two birds with one stone.

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      • vanillama@programming.dev ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Made me actually laugh out loud

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      • mojofrododojo@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        huuuuuuuuuuurk

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  • isleepinahammock@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I’m going to enjoy torturing my 14-year-old self. My 14-year-old self was a shithead. But I was raised in a conservative Catholic house, and at that age I firmly embraced the version of reality common among the Fox News set. I was that annoying conservative high schooler. Sure I was repping hard, but I was still an idiot.

    Now I’m a late-30s trans woman, about to celebrate 8 years of marriage to my wonderful husband.

    The things I can say. I’m going to haunt this kid’s dreams.

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    • vanillama@programming.dev ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I’m happy you found yourself and your husband, that’s awesome!

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      • isleepinahammock@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Thanks!

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    • WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Haha oh fuck yeah!

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  • Malyca@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Hell yeah she would. I’m relatively safe and no longer being traumatized, that’s all she ever wanted.

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  • DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    14-year-old me would not be impressed, but 24-year-old me would be.

    The difference is experience and understanding what the hell we’re all up against.

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    • TachyonTele@piefed.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Good answer

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  • EtAl@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    That little fuckhead got me into this mess.

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  • Noodle07@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I’m playing video games all day every day. He would be amazed. It’s adult me knows it’s bad

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  • taiyang@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I’m one of the few people who’s 14 yo self would fucking admire, mostly for stupid teenage horny reasons but also video game industry reasons.

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    • ignotum@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      You work in the cultured video game industry?

      You’re doing the lord’s work 🫡

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      • taiyang@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Even better (by 14 yo me standards), I met a pretty girl online, whom I later married and got into the industry (albeit, less cultured? Lol).

        When questioned by my childhood self why I am not making games myself, I point to my backlog and we both nod in agreement before I thoroughly wreck him in Smash Bros.

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  • fartographer@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I’m not sure if I’d be proud or disappointed.

    trigger warning

    By age 10, I’d already decided I was going to kill myself at 24, and I was looking forward to it, assuming I hadn’t already died by then. By my 14th birthday, I was doing my annual countdown from 10.

    I don’t know if I’d be excited that I found things that made life worth living, or consider myself a failure for getting it wrong when I tried. Reflecting on that age, I don’t think myself an idiot or anything, I just see a kid who tried their best with what they had, and had already given up on what seemed like an inescapable situation. I feel bad for 14 year-old me, and I’m not sure I’d be able to face that kid without feeling completely destroyed.

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    • Shellofbiomatter@lemmus.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Why 24? If you don’t mind asking. That’s kinda odd number.

      Like i chose 18, as im an adult by then and all the drug lectures at school painted a picture that I’d be offered drugs everywhere. So the plan was to OD at 18th birthday, seemed kinda nice way to go and a better alternative than become communal Fleshlight in the prison. Not that there was even any realistic threat of that happening, but thats in hindsight.

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      • fartographer@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        From a school assignment asking what I would be like at 25 years old. I decided that I never wanted to be 25.

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    • Jax@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      So, I don’t know if there’s some kind of psychological phenomenon at play here — but it sounds like something very similar to a circumstance my mom went through (albeit, the stakes were much different).

      She used to smoke, and when she decided she wanted to have a kid (eventually me) she gave it up. What she told herself was that if she quit and wanted to start back up at 65, ok? Who cares, she’s already old at that point so it’s not like it’s worse than having smoked for the previous 45 years.

      Eventually never went back to them. She is actually repulsed by cigarettes now.

      I think what I take from that is my mom didn’t really give up cigarettes, at least not psychologically. In her mind she could go back at any time and there was no issue, she’d just go back to not smoking (and she didn’t even do that, she just quit). I wonder if maybe a similar thing happened to you here? You gave yourself a goal so far ahead in the future that you also gave yourself ample time to grow — even if that goal was inevitably death. It’s almost like sewerslide was your way of equalizing the playing field.

      Idk, I could be wrong — I’m glad you didn’t, though.

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      • fartographer@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        I accredit proper medication, scaring the shit out of my friends and family who I thought would have been happy if I were gone, and LARGELY that change in mindset that you’re talking about.

        Thank you for sharing that story

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  • MousePotatoDoesStuff@piefed.social ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I just want to hug him and tell him and anyone his age that “teenage/school years are the best years of your life” is a bold-faced LIE.

    It gets better.

    It gets WAY better.

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    • FistingEnthusiast@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Leaving a small town, with small people, with small minds was a revelation

      I was finally able to start becoming who I am, rather than what was needed to survive

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      • MousePotatoDoesStuff@piefed.social ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Am happy for you and hoping for the best of you in the future :D

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    • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      “teenage/school years are the best years of your life”

      I think it’s a point in your life when you are old enough to do things you’ve never done before but young enough to still have plenty of room to take risks, fuck up, and come out better for it.

      Not the apex of your career or the peak of your romance life or anything. But the moment when anything is possible and you shouldn’t feel hedged in by obligations or fear of failure.

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  • osanna@lemmy.vg ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    At 14 I was self harming and only couple years from my first suicide attempt. I don’t do either now, so yes, probably

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  • TropicalDingdong@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Listen, I’m not here to impress a mentally ill child. But also no.

    ftfy.

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  • captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Look, I’d like to see that little shit do better.

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  • Lawyerator@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    If I had advice to give my younger self, I’d have to be very careful about the whole causality problem. At 45 I have two awesome kids aged 5 and 2. I have an amazing wife who multiplies both my happiness and ability to make a living. Both my wife and I were previously divorced. I wouldn’t change anything that might prevent me from meeting her and helping to bring my kids into the world.

    If I had perfect temporal guardrails that would ensure this family path, I’d tell my younger self that it works out pretty well in the long run, but huge mistakes were needed to forge me into who I am today. Also, buy Nvidia stock.

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  • Daft_ish@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    14 y/o me would be pretty damn jealous.

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    • FistingEnthusiast@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      It’s a good feeling

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      • Daft_ish@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Yeah, 14 y/o me had a lot of shit to wade through before he could be me.

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  • 0ops@piefed.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Probably not, but I’m not very proud him either soo…

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  • minorkeys@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    He’d probably give suicide a lot more consideration.

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  • crunchy@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    14-year-old me would be shocked that I’m even alive at 38, let alone living comfortably with a loving family.

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  • captainlezbian@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I think 14 year old me would be most disappointed that I’m no longer catholic. She’d probably be a mix of angry and excited that I’m trans. Shocked and confused when I explain to her that her parents’ marriage is really really bad and she’s going to need therapy for the way her dad treats her. Then she’s going to be kinda pissed when I tell her that her dad is right about her needing to do better in school, it’s just that he shouldn’t be yelling at her until she self harms about it. She’ll be proud I’m still friends with her friends and that I got out of Ohio to somewhere cool.

    Oh then she’s going to be incredibly disappointed I married someone with tattoos, especially since I’ll call her a classist little shit about it.

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    • nickiwest@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      14-year-old me would also be very disappointed that I’m no longer religious. She would be afraid for me because I have gay and trans friends.

      Poor little Nicki. She was brainwashed and didn’t know better. Fortunately, she got better after her first semester at university.

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  • STUNT_GRANNY@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I dunno about “proud”, 14-year-old me was around when saying “gay” was usually a punchline, or an insult. Maybe he’d be surprised about my ex-boyfriend. Or my current boyfriend.

    Whatever problems he might have with my current self, he’d definitely come around after all the insider trading information I’d give him.

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  • LogicalDrivel@sopuli.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Real talk, i was on Accutane back then and i seriously don’t remember much of my life between 13-15yo. I was only supposed to be on it for 6 months but insurance crap left me taking half doses for a couple year. The pros of that time are, ill never have a pimple again… cons include, i have extremely dry skin all the time, i tried to murder my mom, i tried to kill myself several times, i have limited memory of my early teen years, it took me years afterwards to feel “like me”. Would 14 year old me be proud of me? He’d probly pull a knife on me and forget it ever happened.
    Ha ha sorry got a little dark there for a second. IDK if its even available anymore but stay away from that crap if it is.

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    • ivanafterall@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I had no idea it could do all that.

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    • ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I was also on Accutane in high school. The worst was after swimming in a pool – the chlorine made my face and lips literally crack. Never tried to kill anybody, at least.

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  • FistingEnthusiast@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I’m an incredibly lucky man

    I’ve led a life that even I sometimes have to remind myself isn’t a dream

    I have loved deeply, been married, divorced, engaged again to the person who is my best friend

    I have travelled, seen amazing things, lived in a few countries and experienced things I couldn’t have imagined

    I have studied at university, as well as getting a trade and progressing a very long with that

    I have been wealthy, I own some stuff that the younger me would think is pretty cool, but I have few material possessions now because “stuff” doesn’t really matter to me

    I have lived in some of the biggest cities in the world, and now I enjoy peace and quiet in one of the most beautiful places in the world

    The porn I create has tens of millions of views, I’ve done things that are wild, creative and on occasion, sexy

    I’m the luckiest bastard on Earth

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    • Notyou@sopuli.xyz ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      The porn I create has tens of millions of views, I’ve done things that are wild, creative and on occasion, sexy

      Username checks out

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      • FistingEnthusiast@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        I don’t believe in false advertising

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    • tetris11@feddit.uk ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      more people need to make pornos, it’s a rite of passage

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      • FistingEnthusiast@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        It’s not something I recommend

        Mine is performance art more than porn, but for those who enjoy it, they really like it and that’s lovely for them

        I just think it’s funny

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  • MehBlah@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I would just encourage 14 year old me to knock my dad out until he figured out I wasn’t his beast of burden to yell and scream at. The last time he laid hands on me was 14. At the time I didn’t realize I physically intimidated him.

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  • gandalf_der_12te@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I think i would be mostly proud of myself. I did a lot of things right, but recently i keep asking myself the question “would i want to spend time with myself”? Like if there was a perfect clone of myself, same mindset, same body, same everything, would i like them?

    Most of my time, the answer has been “Yes”. Now, i’m starting to respond to it with “no”, actually not. I’m just not the kind of person myself that i myself would like to be around; ironically that’s what makes me more popular among other people, it seems. So i’ve traded liking to be around myself to others liking to be around me. I still like myself, but i wouldn’t wanna be with another version of myself, if that makes sense. Of some things, there better exist only one of it, if you know what i mean.

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  • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Image

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  • bizarroland@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Probably not 14-year-old me, but 12-year-old me, yes, because I used to lie to my classmates that I lived in a three-story geodesic dome home with a hot tub on the top main floor, and now that I am an adult, by complete and total happenstance, I live in a three-story geodesic dome with a hot tub on the top main floor.

    I am not attempting to defend my lying, I know it was stupid, it was foolish, and I regret it to this very day, but it is interesting that it became the truth eventually.

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    • ivanafterall@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I always wanted a geodesic dome house!

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      • isleepinahammock@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        They’re fine…until you see the monolithic concrete dome home!

        Image

        www.monolithic.org

        I want a house that laughs at tornadoes, earthquakes, and the rare simultaneous tornadoquake.

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  • OR3X@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    14 year old me would be very impressed with the things I have in my garage, but I’m not sure he’d be impressed with a depressed man in his 30’s.

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  • shneancy@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    i transitioned, my 14 year old self would cry from joy

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