fartographer

@fartographer@lemmy.world

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I rember!⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩:

  Whoops, closed their unnecessary arrow in the tailgate and now it’s flapping in the wind

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I'm completely serious⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago⁩:

  Michael Jackson remains dead but is brought up in the chat

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Hermetically sealed, for your health!⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  Why would it be called a solvent if it doesn’t solve anything???

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Maybe, maybe not⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  Probably

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨How possibly?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  But what if I’m stupid or racist? Or both?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨How possibly?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  If that dragon didn’t want its tail tickled, it wouldn’t have sat there all coy-like with a screwdriver nearby. Now if you’ll excuse me, I think I saw a fork in the same room as an outlet.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨How possibly?⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  As a white guy, I have the kind of privilege that allows me enough space to realize that I’m sad. Hell, I could probably just walk up to a cop and tell them I’m sad, and they’d offer me some horrible, but well-meaning advice.

  But when I mention my Judaism, something interesting might happen. Especially if I told them that my Zionist family lives in Israel. But the real excitement will start when I say “free Palestine.”

  But the saddest part of all is that I could say nothing, and just be white, and no one will give a fuck. It’s mostly sad because I’m incapable of saying nothing.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Thank you, Nvidia 🙏😇⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Shit Pocket

  Jim Gaffigan

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Jensen Huang says gamers are 'completely wrong' about DLSS 5 — Nvidia CEO responds to DLSS 5 backlash⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  “My shoes are fine, it’s everyone else that smells like dog shit.”

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨TBD on that⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  New scientists?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Ok... i need this.⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  During the pandemic, I ended up with multiple large bottles of green hand sanitizer, so I 3D printed various animals and a nose with a nozzle design jammed in them. My favorite one was a pig that squirted from its nose.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Gaysadilla⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  “Cooks” with propane, blows face off

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨This fuckass ad keeps popping up while I'm trying to study Norwegian⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Image

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Gaysadilla⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  I like how it appears that you’ve just chucked everything into an inferno, which is exactly correct.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨If you're going to accept art this horny please pay someone⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  I bet it feels amazing

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Don't tell me that you all don't have the same issue⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  I’ll come help. You lift and I’ll tickle you

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Damn fine color

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨fuck it, just paste your clipboard in the comments⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Where the fuck did that cat go?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨What does the acronym MAGA stand for? (wrong answers only)⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  No, Colonel Sanders. YOU’RE wrong! Mama’s right!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Fascism bad.⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  Just like alligators. They’re so ornery because they have all them teeth and no toothbrush

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨if you google Chicxulub (the dinosaur killing space rock) a meteor will fly across your screen⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  I said it was because the mammals were better at hiding and all the dinosaurs ate each other

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Xbox as a platform is officially dead⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  My SeXbox Series SeX has sat in the corner, unplugged, since a few months after the OG Legion Go came out. At first, it was because I preferred the experience on my LeGo. But that’s now turned into me not wanting to receive updates, in case someone finally figures out how to install Linux on the thing and that it requires an older firmware.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨90's throwback⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Have you tested using controls to find out if your life was improved by the pizza vs the bagel?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨McDonald’s CEO’s awkward taste test sparks mocking online: ‘His aura screams kale salad’⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  I highly doubt an AI agent that’s ready to suggest nuking everyone

  That Nazi CEO swore up and down that we could inhabit Mars if we just nuked the crap out of it. AI doesn’t have the ability to come up with these kinds of statements on its own, which means that it was fed content with people already identifying nukes as a solution to anything.

  The nuking issue is less of an off-the-rails Matrix kinda situation, and more of a “I learned it by watching our CEOs!”

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨ard⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Why would they have a second pejorative for someone who is excessively overbo?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨ard⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  -the barista staring blankly at me in hopes that I’ll just answer how much mocha syrup I wanted-

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨how to pick up a baby⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Is there a barista here? Cuz this roast just got dark!

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Secret message in the cemetery⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Nah, already got banned from life. Try banning from death, let’s see what fresh new horror we raise.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Stubborn, maybe, but if it ain't broke⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Me: Choking on a bone

  My dinner guests: stunned after I bit into the whole Thanksgiving turkey and slammed my face into the table

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨That nice liberal, I see they got you working the easy shift⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Image