Or get them a Tungsten cube. Every man wants a Tungsten cube.
Got my guys house stuff and a whole new wardrobe
Submitted 5 hours ago by itsviolet@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/a69f008d-818f-4918-8c12-450808c6b09b.jpeg
Comments
Addv4@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
StellarExtract@lemmy.zip 36 minutes ago
True, I have a tungsten cube! It’s a small one, and I have never had an object get lost in the couch more easily. Sinks right to the bottom.
RiceMunk@sopuli.xyz 4 hours ago
Am man. Didn’t realise before that I wanted a tungsten cube. Now I want one.
ceenote@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
They’re absurdly overpriced, but I wonder how quickly you’d make your money back if you bought a big one and had men pay a fee to mess with it for a few minutes.
TheTechnician27@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
and had men pay a fee to mess with it for a few minutes.
This sounds more sexual than I think you intended.
solipsisticskeptic@fedinsfw.app 2 hours ago
This tungsten cube cured my mortality. I, in my exalted wisdom and unbridled ambition, bought this cube to become fully accustomed to the intensity of its density, to make its weight bearable and in fact normal to me, so that all the world around me may fade into a fluffy arena of gravitational inconsequence. And it has worked, to profound success. I have carried the tungsten with me, have grown attached to the downward pull of its small form, its desire to be one with the floor. This force has become so normal to me that lifting any other object now feels like lifting cotton candy, or a fluffy pillow. Big burly manly men who pump iron now seem to me as little children who raise mere aluminum.
I can hardly remember the days before I became a man of tungsten. How distant those days seem now, how burdened by the apparent heaviness of everyday objects. I laugh at the philistines who still operate in a world devoid of tungsten, their shoulders thin and unempowered by the experience of bearing tungsten. Ha, what fools, blissful in their ignorance, anesthetized by their lack of meaningful struggle, devoid of passion.
Nietzsche once said that a man who has a why can bear almost any how. But a man who has a tungsten cube can bear any object less dense, and all this talk of why and how becomes unnecessary.
Schopenhauer once said that every man takes the limits of his own field of vision for the limits of the world. Tungsten expands the limits of a man’s field of vision by showing him an example of increased density, in comparison to which the everyday objects to which he was formerly accustomed gain a light and airy quality. Who can lament the tragedy of life, when surrounded by such lightweight objects? Who can cry in a world of styrofoam and cushions?
Have you yet understood? This is no ordinary metal. In this metal is the alchemical potential to transform your world, by transforming your expectations. Those who have not yet held the cube in their hands and mouths will not understand, for they still live in a world of normal density, like Plato’s cave dwellers. Those who have opened their mind to the density of tungsten will shift their expectations of weight and density accordingly.
To give this cube a rating of anything less than five stars would be to condemn life itself. Who am I, as a mere mortal, to judge the most compact of all affordable materials? No. I say gratefully to whichever grand being may have created this universe: good job on the tungsten.
It sure is dense. I sit here with my tungsten cube, transcendent above death itself. For insofar as this tungsten cube will last forever, I am in the presence of immortality.
Godric@lemmy.world 1 hour ago
Brilliant, thank you
tetris11@feddit.uk 1 hour ago
I once had to spend a night holding an Aluminium cube. The vendor suggested we all go out and club it. I had no option. It was that or go with wood. I figured it’d be safer with the metals.
For the first time ever I saw the lesser metals in their natural habitat, and it weren’t pretty. I’d seen them clustered at exhibits before, being proud but… this time I was surrounded.
Everywhere I went it felt like they were watching me; fish-white sheen puckered by the rusted light; tight forms peering out for fresh meat; screechy, booze-soaked surfaces hollering out for a hand to take ’em halfway up the road to the next all-night watering hole. A shatter of glass; a round of applause; a sixteen-year-old mother of three vomiting in an open sewer, bairns looking on, chewing on potato cakes. I ain’t never going back to holding Aluminium… not never.
spicytuna62@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
William Osman made the tungsten cube so expensive. It was like $2k when he did his video wrecking shit with it. Now they’re asking $10k for the 3 inch cube.
I respect the hustle, but damn.
Still, the 1 cm model is like $50 and would still be absurdly heavy for its size, even if it only weighs 19¼ grams.
Might be worth it to find yourself a bunch of old incandescent lightbulbs and get the filaments out instead.
janewaydidnothingwrong@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
I would love a tungsten cube and I want think sheets of titanium so I can burn them because turns out titanium burns
spicytuna62@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
The sheer number of flammable metals out there is a little scary lol It’s not that many, but it’s more than most people realize.
Living in an oxygen-rich environment has its drawbacks lol
danekrae@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
That would be cool… And heavy too.
affenlehrer@feddit.org 3 hours ago
Heavy and hard!
ILikeTraaaains@lemmy.world 3 hours ago
I want one.
affenlehrer@feddit.org 3 hours ago
You know how to man, man.
hansolo@lemmy.today 2 hours ago
Metal flasks are such a stupid gift.
You want whiskey? Buy a god damned bottle. A flask holds A big pour of liquid. You’re going to bring a drink somewhere? Good one, Bevis.
Sneaking it into something? Nope, it’s metal and clunky big.
Metal conducts heat, so your bodyheat hot whiskey will burn the whole time, no matter how good it is.
Be an adult and buy a plastic nalgeen flask you keep in your sock. Does the place do pat-downs? Ok, then chug 8 oz of whiskey in the parking lot like god intended. They can’t take it from you when it’s in you already. ; )
Sc00ter@lemmy.zip 1 hour ago
I bought a plastic flask in college and my buddies ragged on me for being cheap… they all borrowed it at least once because the venue they wanted to go to had metal detectors.
hansolo@lemmy.today 1 hour ago
Yep. Taken mine into Pitchfork, hockey games, and whatever else. Metal flasks are as useful as a plaque on a wall. Nice visually, not functionally.
zoloftt@lemmy.world 5 hours ago
Flannel is imbu3d with sandalwood scent…
cannedtuna@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
But… I like sandalwood. Also sage and cedar (even tho I’m allergic to real cedar)
Can’t stand those whiskey, smoke, leather, etc “manly” smells.
zoloftt@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
SAME! Just find it funny that those are the limited selection of “manly” smells.
I prefer floral scents but my wife is allergic.
She’s also allergic to whatever they use for a lot of the “manly” scents so I’m limited to whatever we discover she can be around without sneezing.
rockSlayer@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 hours ago
Wait, what? I thought that scent was Extreme Tiger Bear
zoloftt@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
Oh man, you’re totally right! Of course they’d use their trademark scent that includes hint-of-leather mixed in?!?
SpruceBringsteen@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
Coincidentally, my favorite cologne has notes of violet. And sandalwood…
zoloftt@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
Love floral scents!
Ariselas@piefed.ca 5 hours ago
It’s like the gift guide knows me so well
RickyRigatoni@piefed.zip 5 hours ago
Titties. That’s the only gift any of us need.
cannedtuna@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
Correction: soapy tiddies.
db2@lemmy.world 5 hours ago
You have to go to Nevada to
sellrent those legally.
rem26_art@fedia.io 5 hours ago
buy that special guy in your life another pickup truck because his current pickup truck looks lonely
seat6@lemmy.zip 4 hours ago
I hate that I’m such a stereotype; but I legitimately want this stuff lol.
West_of_West@piefed.social 3 hours ago
You can never go wrong buying a man a sword
Hudell@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 hours ago
Something that you really want and is worth $1 but you can’t buy for less than $20 is something you’ll never buy for yourself. That’s often a pretty good gift.
lightnsfw@reddthat.com 2 hours ago
Yeah, I just send people my list of shit that I think I want but I’m on the fence about spending money on when they ask for gift ideas. Can’t go wrong there. Certainly better than them going off script and trying to get something on their own based off what they think they know about my interests.
zod000@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 hours ago
You forgot they season it with moss, musk, or some random type of wood. WTF do they think I am, a termite?
The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
I bet the side of that flask has little holders for your cigars and beard trimmers too.
ceenote@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
That’s last year’s model. This year’s model includes a beard.
binarytobis@lemmy.world 25 minutes ago
There are some gifts that are good for a lot of people regardless of their interests, but these guides never seem to know any of them and it’s annoying.
For instance everywhere cold that I’ve lived, people would love another heated blanket, even if they already have one. Or really just any blanket, can’t have too many. Also a good evaporative humidifier is something everyone needs and no one has. It took me 15 years to buy a real carpet cleaner for myself, just check their house while you’re over to see if there’s one lying around. Consumable stuff is great because even if they already have it they can use more soon.
Guides ignore this kind of thing and pretty much exclusively recommend stuff that most people wouldn’t like due to tastes. “Get them this clip-on book light!” but they only read on tablets, or they already have a light because that problem needed immediate solving, or they simply don’t like the kind you bought because there are so many.
Anyway the guides are terrible, but they don’t have to be.