Boobs are not supposed to be a solid blob… What have you done to them?
You have 8 seconds.
Submitted 1 day ago by fossilesque@mander.xyz to science_memes@mander.xyz
https://mander.xyz/pictrs/image/892ca055-acc0-4952-910a-286b77a1f850.jpeg
Comments
Ajel@lemmy.world 2 hours ago
explodicle@sh.itjust.works 5 hours ago
I wouldn’t say anything because some women find elevator pickup attempts intimidating.
ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 hours ago
Tbf women say they find just interacting with men at all intimidating, see: Bears. I just don’t talk to anyone anymore tbh.
I’m gonna die alone with my cats, but at least I won’t be called creepy for asking a woman out for coffee!
Use the apps
No, privacy nightmare.
kilgore_trout@feddit.it 1 hour ago
Don’t trust what the loud voices say.
Many, if not most, women are normal humans like you, looking for interaction like you.
explodicle@sh.itjust.works 4 hours ago
No that’s not fair, they do not. Don’t be creepy in the elevator, or alone in the woods, or anywhere else where you guys are gonna say “because of the implication”.
hex@programming.dev 3 hours ago
That’s just wrong and putting a blanket statement for no reason.
isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de 5 hours ago
explodicle@sh.itjust.works 4 hours ago
Way back when I was single, I could pick up a woman without even having to corner her.
GhiLA@sh.itjust.works 5 hours ago
“Nice uhh, b-leather we’re having, uh.”
cry, drop my spaghetti and run out
samus12345@lemmy.world 2 hours ago
Nothing, I don’t like small talk with strangers.
cowardsgfy@lemmy.world 2 hours ago
“why don’t you drop them drawers and let me tap that ass one good time?”
always works
iAmTheTot@sh.itjust.works 1 day ago
Absolutely nothing, because I wouldn’t want a stranger to talk to me in an elevator and I was raised to do unto others.
Mac@mander.xyz 21 hours ago
I make brief eye contact, purse my lips to form a half-smile, and nod my head downward. Then i move to an open corner of the elevator, i pull my phone out, and i end my turn.
TastyWheat@lemmy.world 2 hours ago
You forgot to roll for initiative!
Mac@mander.xyz 2 hours ago
Combat hasn’t been initiated. lol
ouRKaoS@lemmy.today 10 hours ago
The elevator stops at the next floor and a Chadbro™ enters. He does not notice you, and does not press any buttons on the elevator. He sniffs his pits before posting his hand on the wall beside the woman and whispers something in her ear. Her face changes to disgust and she darts a pleading glance in your direction, silently asking for help.
Good_morning@lemmynsfw.com 5 hours ago
I smile casually then turn slightly away from them before sitting down crossed legs facing away, trying to focus on my romantic web comics.
chiliedogg@lemmy.world 12 hours ago
Well, considering the only elevator I take is to a secure area, I’d ask to see your visitor’s badge and inform you civilians aren’t allowed here unescorted.
Slovene@feddit.nl 11 hours ago
She IS the escort.
rc__buggy@sh.itjust.works 5 hours ago
I got a gift card from the airport for challenging the “secret shopper” once. Apparently had walked past four actual employees before I challenged him. I was on my way to the jobsite.
meliaesc@lemmynsfw.com 11 hours ago
Why do you assume she doesn’t have clearance?
chiliedogg@lemmy.world 2 hours ago
We have 11 people with clearance and I know them all.
Jimmyeatsausage@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
No access badge clearly visible attached between neck and waist.
Toofpic@feddit.dk 6 hours ago
Only cleav…ance. Haha!
Fleur_@lemm.ee 1 day ago
Considering it’s only 8 seconds this must be the fastest fucking elevator ever so I’m probably screaming
Damage@feddit.it 1 day ago
The elevator is actually out of order, she likes hanging in there, but you leave as soon as you see it doesn’t work
littlewonder@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
Is she a ghost?
psmgx@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
Well, Pac-man was originally called Puck-man. They changed it because… Not because Pac-man looks like a hockey puck. “Paku Paku” means “flap your mouth”, and they were worried that people would change, scratch out the P turn it into an F, like…
ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 hours ago
lischni_tschelowek@discuss.tchncs.de 11 hours ago
Were you the Pac-man guy?
Quadhammer@lemmy.world 1 hour ago
No I was the fuck man guy… wait
Superfool@lemmy.world 13 hours ago
Get in the lift.
Stare while ripping an absolutely rancid fart that strips the enamel off her teeth.
Sharpie my number across her tits and give her “double-guns” on the way out
isolatedscotch@discuss.tchncs.de 5 hours ago
Omgpwnies@lemmy.world 10 hours ago
Illecors@lemmy.cafe 9 hours ago
Thanks for making me laugh!
Zaphod@discuss.tchncs.de 15 hours ago
Nothing because I’m taking the stairs
Dead_or_Alive@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
Me: Barely looking at her “Ohh hey Trish, sorry for not calling you back”
Her: Looks at me weird… “My names not Trish”
Me: Glance at Her a little closer. “Ohh sorry you look like someone I dated once.” Go back to staring ahead and exit the elevator like a boss.
UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 1 day ago
Absolutely nothing because people who have elevator conversations are not worth talking to.
butter@midwest.social 5 hours ago
Hey. Some of my best conversations have taken place in an elevator.
But yeah, I’m not worth talking to
I_Miss_Daniel@lemmy.world 2 hours ago
Give girl lei
Fleur_@lemm.ee 1 day ago
Second 1: introduce myself Second 2: Andrew Tate pose Second 3: obtain phone number Second 4: go on date Second 5: head home with them Second 6: get touchy Second 7: undress Second 8: get off at my floor because I already came at second 1.
Slovene@feddit.nl 11 hours ago
EllenKelly@hexbear.net 1 day ago
Youre disgusting.
Fleur_@lemm.ee 23 hours ago
Yeah my bad for responding to the premise with sexual comedy rather than quirky comedy
GiveOver@feddit.uk 1 day ago
I know, who gets phone numbers these days?
Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 15 hours ago
I was expecting this to be a video where her tits bounce in an elevator. Thoroughly disappointed.
Emi@ani.social 1 day ago
Nothing and just awkwardly stare on the floor or wall, like with anyone else.
problematicPanther@lemmy.world 15 hours ago
If a hotdog is a sandwich, is the ocean a soup?
TheRealKuni@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
A hotdog is not a sandwich.
If you serve bacon, lettuce, and tomato on a plate, you do not call that a sandwich.
But if you serve a hotdog without a bun, you still call it a hotdog.
QED.
samus12345@lemmy.world 2 hours ago
And using that same reasoning, a hotdog on a bun is a sandwich.
ben_dover@lemmy.ml 11 hours ago
In German, that would be a just a sausage
fossilesque@mander.xyz 14 hours ago
It is The Primordial Soup
Agent641@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
I would like the primordial salad instead
AllOutOfBubbleGum@lemmy.world 9 hours ago
A hotdog is a taco.
A7thStone@lemmy.world 12 hours ago
You don’t have the proper PPE for the radiologically controlled area.
captainlezbian@lemmy.world 10 hours ago
Honest flirtatious answer: I’d say nice dress and match the energy and vibe of her response.
Not flirtatious answer: ”it always feels weird how you can notice the acceleration in tall elevators”
Anticorp@lemmy.world 1 day ago
That’s because you have big jugs.
I mean, I want to squeeze em!
Mamma!
Raiderkev@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
I was thinking about this exact scene
RestrictedAccount@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
Risky click of the day paid off
TachyonTele@lemm.ee 13 hours ago
Damn. Mod removed my comment because it said “boobies”. Surprised yours is still up.
azalty@jlai.lu 17 hours ago
What the fuck was that x)
Raiderkev@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
Liar liar. 90s movie where Jim Carey plays a lawyer that gets put under a spell or something n then can’t tell a lie anymore.
AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world 10 hours ago
“Damn! You do wonderful things for that dress.” But only if I have an available exit to walk away after. That one’s too forward for the actual elevator ride. Leave her an out, and also an opening.
callouscomic@lemm.ee 1 day ago
“I need less time to finish.”
Simulation6@sopuli.xyz 15 hours ago
Tip my fedora and say M’Lady
Fixbeat@lemmy.ml 1 day ago
If you jump at the right moment, you can achieve weightlessness.
werejay@lemmy.world 16 hours ago
“Are you an AI model?” #new_kind_of_creepy
Entertainmeonly@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 day ago
Omg girl, you look amazing in that dress. I’m so jealous. Be safe girl and remember to cover your drink.
A_Union_of_Kobolds@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Literally the only correct answer other than polite silence.
Damage@feddit.it 1 day ago
There’s always “hello” and “have a nice day”
Frogmanfromlake@hexbear.net 1 day ago
Nothing. It’s eight seconds and both of us are probably going to be glancing at our phones anyway.
jaschen@lemm.ee 1 hour ago
Does someone have the rest of the photo set or video… For research.