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She only wanted the ring bros

⁨420⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨cm0002@infosec.pub⁩ to ⁨memes@sopuli.xyz⁩

https://infosec.pub/api/v3/image_proxy?url=https%3A%2F%2Fsh.itjust.works%2Fpictrs%2Fimage%2Fa2bc8937-5a76-41bf-a9e5-4e30bf0b223d.jpeg

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  • puppinstuff@lemmy.ca ⁨17⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

    A few years in couples counseling and trying different things to get back into a physical relationship. Her libido just went to zero after our kid and it never returned.

    A lot of anger and frustration and self doubt. Only thing I can say is to be patient and supportive. Sometimes it’s not about us. We can’t always make it better we can certainly make it worse if we’re not careful.

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  • astutemural@midwest.social ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    The meme isn’t judging all men, people. It’s calling out a specific behavior and attitude. Not sure why people are so upset. Unless you actually do this, of course.

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  • HazardousBanjo@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    “She wanted a divorce out of nowhere!” - Every deadbeat dad.

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  • mriormro@lemmy.zip ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    This is some boomer shit

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  • Hello_there@fedia.io ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    The fun part is when you are involved and it still happens

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    • sneakypersimmon@lemmy.today ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Oh no you put the “nice” coins into your wife and she didn’t give you sex like a vending machine??

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      • Soulg@ani.social ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        You need therapy, and probably to get out of the basement and interact with people outside

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    • cm0002@infosec.pub ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

      Well atp, it’s just genetics and hormones, which isn’t really her fault either lol

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      • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        Long as it’s still the man’s fault for desiring intimacy, am I right or am I right ladies?

        The assumption that it’s always a neglectful husband causing marital issues is incredibly demoralizing, especially when the response to “but what if it isn’t a neglectful husband” is this sort of thing. Just more reasons why the man is the one being unreasonable.

        Look, no man is “owed” their wife’s affections or physical intimacy. But it is often an important piece of an adult romantic relationship, and it’s not unreasonable for a member of that relationship to have some feelings about things changing over time, or suddenly for that matter.

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      • protist@retrofed.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        If that’s your perspective, is anyone ever responsible for anything? Or is it all just genetics and hormones

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      • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

        So it’s his fault or it’s not her fault?

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    • a_non_monotonic_function@lemmy.world ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      It doesn’t sound like you were actually involved.

      Or you don’t understand what the mother’s body goes through.

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      • sneakypersimmon@lemmy.today ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        We’ve got men in here confused as to why women get more time off after giving birth.

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  • RBWells@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I dunno, my ex was ok with the kids, and I was able to sleep & nurse at the same time (small boobs) but breastfeeding knocked my libido down to less than zero. Usually I run pretty hot, but while nursing it was like I couldn’t care at all about sex, it felt like a chore, and when we did, I had both fear (because childbirth) and had to work just to get to a baseline level of desire at all. I always figured it was a natural birth control thing, nature helping so kids don’t come too close together.

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  • faqtimaan@lemmy.wtf ⁨18⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I dont think that is true tbh dads nowadays take care of babies as much as moms even after doing job and everything

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    • sneakypersimmon@lemmy.today ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      There’s still a huge gap. Men do more, but still not as much as women.

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  • aMockTie@piefed.world ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    When my daughter was born, my wife and I would take turns caring for her through the night. She pumped breast milk so I had access to food as needed on my nights, and she could breastfeed directly on her nights.

    It soon became clear that our daughter preferred direct breastfeeding to the bottle, but I was much better at calming her and getting her back to sleep. The result was that I ended up covering my wife’s nights more frequently because she was otherwise at home with the baby all day while I was at work and felt like she needed the break. I was also “used” to sleep deprivation from the past years when I was working full-time while also going to college full-time, and she would stay home and watch TV, read, or paint.

    I was constantly exhausted for the first 6 months, until she was mostly able to sleep through most nights. I would regularly apologize to my coworkers for my reduced cognitive ability because I didn’t get any sleep the previous night or two, and my boss would express how he didn’t understand how I was still vertical. Thankfully they were all very understanding and accommodating, and I was at least still able to get most of my work done to our standard of quality, albeit much more slowly than usual.

    I didn’t have time, opportunity, or energy to even consider the prospect of intimacy at that time, so I absolutely sympathize with new mothers with absentee partners that have normal levels of energy and libido.

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    • ChexMax@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      The number one way (more effective than medication) to increase a woman’s libido is an extra hour of sleep. It’s truly no wonder that getting negative hours of sleep for a literal year at least kills libido.

      I’m pregnant and the insomnia is killing me. 4 or 5 hours a night, usually. And the poor sleep will only continue when the child is born. Everyone’s talking about how men need to help more with chores and all that’s true and good that you need division of labor, but even if you’re good at division, the sleep loss with children is inevitable.

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  • Tattorack@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Wat…

    Must be America again, because I’ve hardly seen this in Denmark, Sweden, Germany, the Netherlands, France, or Spain (all countries I’ve either visited for extended periods of time, or lived in for portions of my life).

    In my own family, however, I am the biggest brother, so they basically made me take care of a lot of the dirty tasks involving my siblings.

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  • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Women do get a shitload more time off work for it than men, so they kinda have to be the one doing most of the childcare regardless of what either parent actually wants.

    Friend of ours recently had another child, she is getting most of a year off, he got a couple weeks.

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    • Tattorack@lemmy.world ⁨8⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Here in Denmark people believe in shared parenting, so both parents get leave. “Parental leave” as opposed to “maternal” or “paternal” leave.

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      • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz ⁨5⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Yeah a few countries are more equal, of course you also have some that equally tell you to get fucked.

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    • sneakypersimmon@lemmy.today ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Hm I wonder why the people giving birth get so much more time off.

      Certainly has absolutely nothing to do with healing, I’m sure.

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      • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Sure, but then don’t be surprised at the other person doing less of the childcare when they have to go back to work almost straight away.

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    • lengau@midwest.social ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      My work gives parental leave based on whether they’re the primary caretaker or the secondary one. The primary gets 6 months, the secondary gets 3.

      What decider whether you’re primary or secondary? Simple. If your partner is taking more than 3 months they’re primary.

      What this means in practice is that for US-based employees pretty much everyone at my company is the primary caretaker since few people’s spouses even have the option for more than 3 months.

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      • some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        You can just lie, no? My employer doesn’t get to know the employment status of my spouse; she doesn’t work for them. Seems like an invasion of privacy, but I could be misunderstanding the policy. If both companies have that same policy does it cause an infinite loop? 😆

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    • doingthestuff@lemy.lol ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      That’s a couple of weeks more than I ever got.

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      • DontTreadOnBigfoot@lemmy.world ⁨17⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Same. I got my PTO requests approved for the day of the delivery and the day after, but “they couldn’t spare me for a third day”

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  • PhobosAnomaly@feddit.uk ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    A dude I used to work with left his wife to deal with the newborn.

    It was so bad between dayshifts that he used to leave the house at 2am and just sit in a motorway service station with a coffee for a few hours just to get some peace before coming to work.

    If I tried that, my other half would stab me in the face.

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    • neomachino@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨23⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      I got 3 months paid paternity leave through a state program. A coworker who had a kid that same month chose to not use the state program and take 2 PTO days instead. I talked to him before hand and told him about the program but he said something like “I wouldn’t be much help, she’s done it twice already so she has it handled”. It was very evident how his wife felt about him at the Christmas party that year.

      She sought out my wife, who she knew had a kid recently too and my wife brought up how nice it was to have me home for those first few months and somehow the state program came up in the conversation. She then booked it over to me and asked me about it, not knowing what was going on or thinking much about it, I told her about it and that I can’t believe coworker didn’t do it. Then all hell broke loose. This tiny little lady dragged out my 6 foot heavy set coworker by the ear, calling him every name in the book. She made him use all his PTO days and went to spend new years somewhere warm. He bitched about how hard it was taking care of 3 kids on his own for weeks.

      ‘Funny’ enough all the guys in the office thought she was being ridiculous but all the women were praising her.

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      • Grail@multiverse.soulism.net ⁨10⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Bruh if I had the choice between working, or raising My baby full time for the same pay, I’d pick the baby. And I hate babies! They’re annoying and needy, that’s why I prefer adoption. But it’s a baby, it deserves to be looked after. And it’s a better feeling to create a person than making the boss rich.

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  • Fishnoodle@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    This was funny line 60 years ago

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  • sin_free_for_00_days@sopuli.xyz ⁨18⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Men, if you don’t want kids, get your tubes tied. Most insurances cover it. Just do it. Don’t wait for the “right time”, just get it done.

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    • I_am_10_squirrels@beehaw.org ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      I got snipped on a valentines day because they had lots of openings. This was after we had been together for three years and decided kids weren’t an option for us. Haven’t regretted it. Next year will be our 20th anniversary.

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  • Beth@piefed.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    I wish I could say this wasn’t my exact experience. Tack on the lack of any romantic overtures and it’s pretty much how it went though.

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  • db2@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    Redneck boomer shit, can’t relate.

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    • maya_the_good_apple@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      To OP or the person in the comic?

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      • db2@lemmy.world ⁨41⁩ ⁨minutes⁩ ago

        The comic itself

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  • TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    I’ve always thought about this should I get married and have kids some day.

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  • MNByChoice@midwest.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago

    An issue with post-interstate USA is the ability to move away from family for education and work, also fragmented the extended family. Managing life, everything and a under-6 month old infant takes way more than two people. (Day care in many areas will accept an infant at 6 weeks, which while huge, is also problematic.)

    I expect the only solution is get rich and help your kids with the grand kids. (UBI!)

    None of this is an excuse to fuck off and not help. It is pathetic when men say “and I never changed a diaper”. Hardly a parent at all at that point.

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    • some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world ⁨11⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      My brother-in-law is like that. Has the kids on the weekends (yup) and refers to it as “babysitting”… his own children. I know he must see all that I do for mine. It makes me nauseous, but I try not to get involved.

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    • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨22⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      This is a severely under-discussed consequence of modern culture distancing family “connections”.

      Don’t get me wrong, there’s only about 4 people on my side of the extended family I actually miss, and 3 on my wife’s side. That’s being generous. But not having that reliable help if you don’t have an absolutely amazing social group makes raising a kid through early childhood an absolute slog.

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      • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz ⁨15⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        We don’t have kids but between the 2 of us we have 1 parent that could get here the same day if needed. 2 who we could see if willing to spend a fortune on the train to very remote areas and a full days travel. 1 who we don’t know what country they are in or even if they are still alive.

        So any extra childcare would be entirely reliant on 1 person. We could move to change that to a different person but that hardly helps, there is no location that would be close to any 2 of our parents.

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  • Nomorereddit@lemmy.today ⁨18⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

    Op is a nazi.

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    • Grail@multiverse.soulism.net ⁨9⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

      Isn’t OP an anarchist?

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      • Nomorereddit@lemmy.today ⁨7⁩ ⁨hours⁩ ago

        Nazi anarchist Israelite maga cis dolphin

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