Typical Murican. Talks a big talk but stays home when their country is being taken over by actual fascists.
Calm your tits
Submitted 3 days ago by ickplant@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/837f85b9-7572-47cf-b6e9-f4e5122a4925.jpeg
Comments
CircaV@lemmy.ca 3 days ago
lightnsfw@reddthat.com 3 days ago
People that act like this voted for the fascists.
b161@lemmy.blahaj.zone 3 days ago
Yep they’re the useful idiots who will use their guns to defend tyrant billionaires racists.
RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 3 days ago
He voted for the fascist.
caboose2006@lemm.ee 3 days ago
If you have to say you’re a badass, guess what…
Delphia@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Real gangsta ass niggas dont flex nuts, cause real gangsta ass niggas know they got em.
klemptor@startrek.website 2 days ago
And everything’s cool in the mind of a gangsta
HawlSera@lemm.ee 2 days ago
I’m reminded of when McDonalds did their Rick and Morty szechuan sauce promotion, and basically no place actually had it.
It was a big story that Rick and Morty fans harassed workers complaining that the franchise lied to them.
It got so bad that McDonalds released an app to show where and when stories had the sauce, and announced they’d be selling posters as well. Unfortunately, some locations lied or at least misused the app to say they had the sauce when they didn’t.
So I went to one location with my brother, and we found a line forming outside. The store wasn’t allowed to sell the posters till late in the afternoon for some reason, and wouldn’t let anyone there for the sauce even enter the building with cashiers actively blocking any Rick and Morty fan from entering, even just looking college age was enough to be refused entry.
I thought this was ridiculous and just said “Wow, the only thing that’d make this worse is if they didn’t have the sauce.”, only for the lady guarding the door to tell me that they did indeed not have the sauce, despite the app saying they did.
There was this guy simping hard for her, mi’lady style, and a bunch of brodudes talking about how they’re so Nihilistic and Smart “JUST LIEK RICK!”, whole thing was a shit so. He said “Oh yeah, no they don’t have the sauce, I asked.”
He was eating cheeseburgers despite not being allowed in, apparently you could have the food brought out to you if you used the app.
It was fucking cold that day. Still feels like, even false advertising aside, something about this had to be illegal.
So I said “Fuck this, I’m leaving.”, just got into my car, went to Wendy’s, ordered chicken nuggets and the most asian sounding sauce they had. Posted one of the only food selfies I’ve ever done of what I ordered
“Was going to post me eating the sauce, but I went to Wendy’s instead because this store actually has products they claim to offer.”
A friend of mine asked the next day what was up with that post, and I told him the story.
He looked at me geniunely impressed, and said “Wait, you valued your own self-respect over the ‘cool corporate thing’, voiced your dissatisfaction, and calmly left without making a scene or embarassing yourself? If anyone was Rick at this event, it was you”
I just said “Huh”, as I didn’t do that to be cool, I was just hungry, wanted to buy nuggets, and didn’t get them from a store that lied about having them…
It was then that my brother, who had been with me when we went to McDonalds spoke up, admitting he didn’t even think of what we actually did that day either, we just up and said “Screw you guys, I’m coming home.” and said one of the wisest things I’ll never forget
“If you think you’re Rick, it means you’re Jerry.”
psx_crab@lemmy.zip 3 days ago
They’re the opposite of badass?
Goodass.
LeninOnAPrayer@lemm.ee 3 days ago
As a power bottom I’m offended you would even consider this idiot to put in that much effort.
roguetrick@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Just because I have COPD doesn’t mean I won’t shit on your floor.
Thcdenton@lemmy.world 3 days ago
I need this on a shirt
frog_brawler@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Yes! And have the Statue of Liberty holding an AR.
“Just because I have COPD doesn’t mean I won’t shit on your floor.”
vga@sopuli.xyz 2 days ago
Those are war corgis.
Iceman@lemmy.world 2 days ago
I myself have a battle Pug. Come and pet it, Harkkonen.
Geldaran@lemmy.world 2 days ago
wargies?
_____@lemm.ee 3 days ago
“I’m about to shut my pants from eye contact with stranger so I need clothing with printed letters to convince you otherwise”
HawlSera@lemm.ee 2 days ago
If you need an AR-15 to feel safe at Target, the problem is you.
frog_brawler@lemmy.world 2 days ago
I dunno… have you been to a Target recently? Anyone shopping there at this point is probably either a proud boy or one of the daughters of liberty and probably walking around with 3 guns on them. I’d feel safer around those people with an AR of my own.
ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 2 days ago
I’m a school bus driver and I have one total moron of a coworker who thinks we should all carry guns to protect the buses. He specifically wants to have his AR15 with him, with its magical 40-round mags like that would make the slightest fucking difference after somebody starts off their assault by blasting the driver’s seat. I’ve been pretending I agree with him and encouraging him to suggest this to our (very liberal) school board - since he’s above me on the seniority list.
LeninOnAPrayer@lemm.ee 3 days ago
Yeah. Just do what normal autistic people like me do. Put earbuds in both ears.
ms_lane@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I think a jacket that says “I’ll shit my pants if you try to fight me, for reals.” would actually be more effective.
Who wants to get into a fight with someone with squidgy undies?
TimboSlice@discuss.online 3 days ago
So many assholes in photo
ganbramor@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Just wild that some losers need to advertise how dumb they are.
BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world 3 days ago
I couldn’t imagine wearing something like this. Honestly, shirts that say anything are kind of out there for me.
RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 3 days ago
It’s like a car covered with bumper stickers. It’s mental illness. Unhealthy fear and rage leaking out around the edges and corrupting the facade of decency.
Mog_fanatic@lemmy.world 3 days ago
So what are we looking at for your wardrobe? Pictures only? Plain colors? Maybe like tie dye?
BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Earth tone plain button ups and jeans, loafers.
horrorslice@lemmy.zip 3 days ago
I’m with him. My buddy calls me a cartoon character because I wear the same outfit everyday. I have multiple pairs of it though.
Black t-shirts (mostly), some other earth tones. All solid.
I’m all for comfort and making shit easy.
kautau@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Not op but pretty much everything I wear is just a plain color clothing item that looks ok and feels comfortable/fits well. It’s cool to focus on fashion, but for me that ends if you’re covering yourself in industry brands, supporting fast fashion/dumb luxury, or placing people above or below each other based on the perceived value of the cloth and metal they choose to wrap themselves in
ayyy@sh.itjust.works 3 days ago
…I need to up my tie dye game.
lightnsfw@reddthat.com 3 days ago
Mines mostly plain color shirts. Some plaid. I have a few graphic tshirts from when I was younger and that people bought me when they were on vacation. Not really a fan of wearing those around though.
ProfHillbilly@lemmy.world 2 days ago
is there a “imverybadass” community?
imvii@lemmy.ca 2 days ago
There wasn’t.
Pudutr0n@feddit.cl 3 days ago
What if someone threatens his corgis tho
fyzzlefry@retrolemmy.com 3 days ago
Dude I’ll jump in to protect the corgis
Madison420@lemmy.world 3 days ago
You’ve never met a corgi huh? They don’t need help they’ll nip the shit out of people they like and downright attack people they don’t. The queen had literal warnings provided to people who entered her residence because they bit so many worlds leaders.
Formfiller@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Dude in the Gravy Seals
Threeme2189@sh.itjust.works 2 days ago
Meal team 6,specially
perishthethought@lemm.ee 3 days ago
If only these people could recognize a tyrant when they see one.
explodicle@sh.itjust.works 3 days ago
Two have so far!
wanderwisley@lemm.ee 3 days ago
These are the same people who own a big lifted truck and then put a giant sticker on the window that says “CHEVY” just in case you or they forgot what they are driving.
RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Some version of a window-wide US flag with the angry eagle, a Gadsden snake sticker, a gun maker sticker, an AR variant sticker with a juvenile anti-lib slogan like “my AR says fuck your lib tears” and of course the NRA sticker and a military service branch sticker.
wanderwisley@lemm.ee 3 days ago
That and or a quote from the Bible or the constitution.
altima_neo@lemmy.zip 3 days ago
And Calvin pissing on a Chevy logo
ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 2 days ago
I like the message the Calvin sticker sends: “I am childish but have an old man’s bladder.”
psx_crab@lemmy.zip 3 days ago
VolumetricShitCompressor@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 days ago
I’LL CRANK MY HOG TO THIS, BROTHER, AROOOO
gamer@lemm.ee 3 days ago
That protruding blob on the back of his neck isn’t fat, it’s actually a bonus concealed weapon slot.
RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Gravy Seal. Proclaiming what a badass he is but probably starts wheezing just making it to the table from the Cracker Barrel parking lot.
Bonus@lemm.ee 3 days ago
*Don’t forget for one second just because I’m not a graphic designer doesn’t mean I don’t get constantly told I fucked up centered justification. *
Aceticon@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 days ago
We had a saying in my country which goes roughly like this: “It’s not the dog that barks which bites”
I’d say it applies here, and I ain’t talking about the corgies.
klemptor@startrek.website 2 days ago
We have something similar: we’d say someone is “all bark, no bite”.
wide_eyed_stupid@lemmy.world 2 days ago
In Dutch we have that saying too. “Blaffende honden bijten niet.” Barking dogs don’t bite.
octopus_ink@slrpnk.net 2 days ago
Does anyone ever think the guys with anything at all like that on their clothing have forgotten how to be violent? Did we need a reminder? Or does this guy just want to be a typical posturing, aggressive, “alpha male” maga shitstain and be certain no one forgets it?
ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Does anyone ever think the guys with anything at all like that on their clothing have forgotten how to be violent?
I don’t think he’s forgotten - I think he’s old and fat and has mostly lost the ability to be violent, except maybe to his wife. A young, fit man would beat the shit out of him and he knows it. IMHO that’s a big reason gun nuts are so into their guns, because it compensates for their physical weakness.
debil@lemmy.world 2 days ago
No, no and yes.
jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works 3 days ago
This reminds me of a buddy I used to have. He wore jackets exactly like this and even had two little dogs. He was a Vietnam vet and did, in fact, kill a whole bunch of people during the war. Something he never forgave himself for.
One time I asked him what that was like. He thought for a minute and said, “When you have your weapon trained on someone, for a split second you have the power of God in your hands. You get to decide if that person lives or dies. Nobody should have that kind of power.”
He was a character but a good dude overall.
unemployedclaquer@sopuli.xyz 2 days ago
my tits are masculine and quite supple, thanks
ArbitraryValue@sh.itjust.works 3 days ago
I think you’re making the exact mistake he is asking you not to.
Bloomcole@lemm.ee 3 days ago
Peak American cringe
taiyang@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Positive spin, he bought it from a pro-LGBTQ+ thrift store to support local causes in his area. I swear I’ve seen similar jackets at said thrift stores.
millie@slrpnk.net 2 days ago
Somebody forgot to center their edgy graphic.
Rolder@reddthat.com 3 days ago
The pair of cute corgis really sells it
Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Can confirm. Our corgis are significantly more dangerous than I am. Doubly, so if they think you might try to clip their nails.
Rolder@reddthat.com 2 days ago
Angry loaves of bread!
frog_brawler@lemmy.world 2 days ago
It’s entirely possible that his brain didn’t forget how to be violent but it’s clear his body did. So this is basically a billboard indicating, “if you sneak up on me and restrict my arms, you can probably find my concealed weapon.”
MITM0@lemmy.world 2 days ago
We call this “StrongMan-Posturing”, this guy never experienced violence.
I remembered a MGTOW guy by the name “Undead-Chronic” (do any of you remember him ?) He chickened out the moment FBI showed up at his door😂
FourThirteen@lemmy.world 3 days ago
This is some serious THE_PACK vibes
slackassassin@sh.itjust.works 2 days ago
DON’T THINK THAT JUST BECAUSE I’M PEACEFUL THAT I FORGOT HOW TO CRANK MY HOG
ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 3 days ago
His first move would be to throw a hissy fit, collapse as soon as you touched him, feign a heart attack and threaten to sue you … all while shouting that you’re going to be deported
RattlerSix@lemmy.world 3 days ago
If he got in your face and you had your hand up and it just barely touched his chest he’d be yelling “CALL 911!! THATS ASSAULT!!!”
ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 3 days ago
Which is why as a person of colour (I’m a big brown Indigenous Canadian) I will never engage with people like this … because I know that if this happened, there is a high likelihood that the police and courts would take his version seriously.
TheRealShadeSlimmy@lemmy.world 3 days ago
“What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.”
DogPeePoo@lemm.ee 3 days ago
When training extensively in unarmed combat, does one employ prosthetics?
ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 3 days ago
That’s beautiful … I haven’t been threatened by an online US Marine in years … I feel honoured … thanks :)
kautau@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Either that or since concealed carry is legal in a ton of states just start firing blindly in every direction and then basically everything you said