jubilationtcornpone
@jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works
- Comment on Everyone's got a fetish, I guess. 17 hours ago:
Tarrantula Hawk Wasp: Blinding, fierce, shockingly electric. A running hair dryer has just been dropped into your bubble bath.
The first time I ever saw one of these it was dragging a paralyzed tarantula back to its nest. That big fucker stopped what it was doing, turned around, and stared at me like it was sizing me up. It then turned back around and continued dragging the tarantula across the ground like, “Oh. It’s just a human. Not an actual threat. No biggie.”
No biggie is right. No way in hell I was getting anywhere close to a 3 inch long wasp.
- Comment on Would you date someone that uses a hammer? 3 days ago:
- Comment on so every shitpost sub is going to be swamped by American politics? please can politics be banned 6 days ago:
Am American. Our politics are currently one giant shit post.
Also, there are no rules against shit posting about international politics. So,
fireflush away. - Comment on Screw your zodiac sign, tell me.. 6 days ago:
#4
I forgot my money even had those dishes.
- Comment on Trump suggests Joe Biden’s prostate cancer diagnosis was a cover-up 1 week ago:
“President Trump has the body of a
morbidly obese 80 year old with congestive heart failure27 year old athlete who runs 8 miles per day. The doctors ran more tests because they wanted to know what his secret for longevity is. Turns out it was all that making America great again with nothing but histinybare hands.” - Comment on The existence of billionaires is a policy failure 1 week ago:
Richard Branson.
- Comment on Knows more than most scientists… according to one extremely reliable source: themselves 1 week ago:
Reminds me of my neighbors complaining some websites had “liberal views” on vaccines.
I didn’t even bother to ask what that meant because the phrase itself was so stupid. I just knew the explanation was going to be even stupider.
- Comment on The car of the guy who insists that you have a terminal case of TDS 1 week ago:
“Always Tell the Truth”
Buddy, I have some really disappointing news for you.
- Comment on You can do anything at Zombocom 1 week ago:
“Welcome to Zombocom.”
- Comment on I didn't verify the headline. 1 week ago:
- Comment on 877-CASH-NOW 1 week ago:
Still waiting to get my healthcare “fixed” after 10 years. Any day now…
- Comment on What the democrats just did. 1 week ago:
C’mon guys. The Republicans are totally going to fix healthcare just like they promised in
1993,2002,2008,2010,20162017,2020,2024, The Last Week.Shouldn’t take more than about two weeks.
- Comment on Protip: Don't lose count 2 weeks ago:
Pro Tip:
If you ever find yourself in the position of having a pistol shoved in your face and you cannot safely escape, it is possible to disarm your assailant.
Quickly grab the wrist or forearm of the hand holding the weapon with one hand and grab the weapon’s muzzle with your other hand. While directing the weapon away from your body, push down on the muzzle like a lever. Your assailant will not be able to maintain their grip on the weapon. Be prepared for the to discharge because it probably will. If you decide to attempt this maneuver, DO NOT hesitate or you will probably get shot.
- Comment on My impression of the americas (based on nothing but prejudice) 2 weeks ago:
- Comment on Our bad 2 weeks ago:
“In 1804, Richard Trevithick developed the high pressure steam engine, unwhittingly dooming all of humanity.”
- Comment on YouTube TV loses all Disney content 3 weeks ago:
I’m just glad I can still block ads on the cheapest subscription for Disney Plus since I haven’t been able to talk my wife into getting rid of it …yet.
- Comment on [deleted] 3 weeks ago:
I had a Zune. It was a phenomenal product. It was just priced too high and trying to compete in a market flooded with cheap MP3 players.
I think the video player functionality wasn’t as big a selling point as they thought it would be to the average user since you either had to purchase films from the store …or acquire them in other ways and convert them to a supported file format.
- Comment on It's just a fancy new name for a lobotomy 4 weeks ago:
I think some ENT’s like to downplay the severity. I was told “we’ll do it on Friday and you’ll be back to work on Monday” which was completely unrealistic.
Recovery time is more like 7-10 days.
- Comment on for future fireflies 4 weeks ago:
That’s how you know it’s really bad.
- Comment on It's just a fancy new name for a lobotomy 4 weeks ago:
They didn’t put you under for that?? God Almighty. My septiplasty was brutal but successful so it was worth it for me. At least they had the decency to knowxi me out for it.
- Comment on Marylin Mothroe 4 weeks ago:
She tried but was thwarted by her incompetent henchmen.
- Comment on Sorry, the revolution will have to wait 5 weeks ago:
“Attention KMart Shoppers!”
- Comment on Mid Career Marine Biology 1 month ago:
The names’s Bond. James Bond.
- Comment on Mid Career Marine Biology 1 month ago:
If there’s a “best” assassin, it only stands to reason that there’s also a “worst” assassin.
- Comment on Me irl 1 month ago:
- Comment on This is real 1 month ago:
I served on the board of a Section 8 housing authority for a number of years.
You would be amazed at the number of people who don’t understand that leases are legally binding contracts and there are actual, enforceable consequences for violating the conditions of it.
“You guys can’t evict me.”
“Uhhh, yeah, we can. It just so happens that hording 30 cats in your house and letting them soak every inch of the place with piss is a violation of the terms of your lease.”
- Comment on This is a real post from the official DHS account on X 1 month ago:
That’s them there liberal talking points from Democrat Jesus.
- Comment on When you say you don't like linux on Lemmy 1 month ago:
MAGA… “Free thinkers.” Lol.
- Comment on What is up with Gen Alphas love for Austin Powers? 1 month ago:
My Teenager: “That’s gas.”
Me: “Lol. Ok Nana. What year is it? 1965?”
Teenager: “What? Nana doesn’t know what ‘gas’ means.”
Me: “You wanna bet? Ever heard of the Rolling Stones? 🎶Jumping Jack Flash. it’s a gas🎶.”
Teenager: 😧
- Comment on My (incredibly divisive) dessert choice 1 month ago:
Laughs waaaayyyy too hard at his own jokes.
