frog_brawler
@frog_brawler@lemmy.world
- Comment on Anon is worried about men 4 hours ago:
I think the rejection of the hard pass was maybe me more deciding that I wasn’t attracted to her. Maybe something else though, you could be right.
Atheist (but maybe Buddhist after a lot of stuff I’ve been reading recently), so the religious thing is mostly a no go. Perhaps I’ll explore Buddhism a bit more though, and see if there’s a temple or something the sort local to me. That could be interesting.
I’ve not gotten up and told a story, no. I don’t really have one that I’d like to share yet. I just enjoy listening to other peoples’ stories for the most part. There’s also the aspect of not necessarily knowing if it’s fact or fiction sometimes that adds some excitement.
- Comment on Anon is worried about men 5 hours ago:
Most speed dating events don’t actually exist. It’s just a scam to collect money and put you on an indefinite wait list.
- Comment on Anon is worried about men 5 hours ago:
I’m 41 now but I haven’t gone on a date-date in 3 years or so. The TL;DR online dating is absolutely not worth participating in. Neither is speed dating, and people are isolating more and more.
I’m not wildly attractive but I’m not unattractive either. I’m probably like a 6 or a 7. I think I’m interesting and can hold a reasonable conversation. I’m intelligent. I’ve been told I’m funny (sometimes). I am a bit clumsy sometimes though. I’ve been in two long term (3+ years) relationships in my life but one of those relationships ended due to alcohol (we mutually sucked at the time), and the other due to financial reasons. Both hurt pretty deep when they ended and I didn’t date for a couple years after either of those.
In the time that I wasn’t feeling some form of loss from relationships that meant something, I tried online dating. I tried OkCupid, Bumble, PlentyOfFish, some bullshit regarding a bagel, Tinder, match.com, etc. I probably tried any of them that were active at the time. Not once did it ever amount to a relationship, in probably 15 years of using those sites off and on. I’ve unquestionably had more bad experiences than good. 9 out of 10 dates are bad. 1 ouf of 10 are ok. The worst time I recall was when a woman drugged me after our date. Another bad time I can recall, my date showed up on drugs or drunk or just incredibly stupid or something. She racked up a $110 bar tab during our 30 minute meet and greet and dipped out without saying anything at all or paying the bill. I was once catfished (is it catfishing when it’s just straight up someone else’s picture, or does it have to be your own picture doctored up / photoshopped to be considered catfishing?) by a co-worker on Bumble. I’ve been stood up for a first date at three or four times. I’ve been cancelled on an hour or two before a date at least 15 times.
The last time I had an online date, everything seemed to be going fine, we had a drink at the first bar, established that we seemingly got along, went on a walk around downtown, check out a show and then all of a sudden I’m being told about a sex kit that she purchased from a vending machine while I was in the bathroom that she wants to try out. I thought she was pretty cool before that. I wasn’t 100% sure if I was attracted to her, but I knew we at least got along on a person-to-person level. Telling me about a sex kit like that on the first date was a “eh, hard pass” for me. Maybe as I’m getting older I need more time to get into that idea. I don’t know. I never really mentioned it to anyone.
Speed dating is also, completely shit; and it’s a scam. The first time I tried speed dating, it was some website where you pick your city, your age range, and then what event you’d want to attend based on your other parameters. They take your money, and then send you an email a day before the event saying the event is cancelled because they couldn’t get enough people, but you cannot have a refund either. Then you attempt to re-schedule and it gets cancelled a second time for the same reason, then a third. Finally - you attend one of these things in person, end up getting “3 matches” emailed to you, and then you attempt to make contact and never hear from anyone ever again.
I felt like a complete horses’ ass when I attempted to do speed dating a second time 12 years later and had a very similar experience. This second time around though, I did a charge back on my credit card after the 3rd cancellation because “they couldn’t get enough people to attend.” Thanks for nothing Troy.
After soooo many bad experiences, and never having any success with what are the now conventional methods, I feel like I have a trauma response to the idea of dating now. I’d still like to be in a happy relationship, but thinking about trying again causes me stress.
I’m introverted by nature, and as of 7 months ago, I live alone in a state, where I also work remotely from home and know no one. I tried a few events from Meetup.com thinking, “hey, maybe this is how 40-year-olds make friends,” but didn’t enjoy anything that I went to, other than the events where people sit in an audience quietly and watch someone else on stage. I found a really cool thing that I like attending where anyone is welcome to get up on stage and tell an 8 minute story about pretty much anything - fact or fiction. I really enjoy attending these, but it’s no way to meet people.
I imagine I’m not alone in my experiences.
- Comment on Today's Survey. One point for everything that you have NEVER DONE 8 hours ago:
0
- Comment on Healthy snack 2 days ago:
What a great invention. I’ve always avoided transporting bananas in case the skin might get dirty.
- Comment on Calm your tits 2 days ago:
Yes! And have the Statue of Liberty holding an AR.
“Just because I have COPD doesn’t mean I won’t shit on your floor.”
- Comment on Calm your tits 2 days ago:
Saying they know the second amendment is giving undue credit.
- Comment on Calm your tits 2 days ago:
I dunno… have you been to a Target recently? Anyone shopping there at this point is probably either a proud boy or one of the daughters of liberty and probably walking around with 3 guns on them. I’d feel safer around those people with an AR of my own.
- Comment on Calm your tits 2 days ago:
It’s entirely possible that his brain didn’t forget how to be violent but it’s clear his body did. So this is basically a billboard indicating, “if you sneak up on me and restrict my arms, you can probably find my concealed weapon.”
- Comment on 90s band alignment chart 2 days ago:
Pretty sure the chart was made by someone born after 2000.
- Comment on 90s band alignment chart 2 days ago:
The entire chart is wrong. There’s no “happy” alignment at all in 90’s bands. Replace “happy” with “heroin” and it makes a lot more sense.
- Comment on Horror 4 days ago:
I feel ripped off yet again!
- Comment on 3's grip looks the most comfy 1 week ago:
You’re deplorable for this choice. 6 is the worst!
- Comment on 3's grip looks the most comfy 1 week ago:
I don’t know the difference between 1 and 2, so I’m going to go with 2. 7 in some instances though.
- Comment on Yeah, let's stop with this "don't judge people for their poiltics" bullshit 1 month ago:
But you’re their all time best seller 😂
- Comment on I watched Arrival (2016), there was a lot more to it than I was expecting 1 month ago:
I know that I enjoyed this movie but I don’t remember it at all. Yay, I get to watch it again like it’s new.
- Comment on Doordash deserves it's fate 1 month ago:
Everybody is drunk, but hungry is a great reason for food delivery.
- Comment on Sid Meier's Civilization VII | Review Thread 1 month ago:
Wow, this completely snuck up on me. How exciting!
- Comment on [deleted] 2 months ago:
- Comment on Nintendo Switch 2 finally officially revealed 2 months ago:
Has Nintendo even released a game since that second Zelda game?
- Comment on Disgusting money driven mindset 2 months ago:
You didn’t think LinkedIn was doing anything wrong when they asked people to put up pictures of themselves? You didn’t catch on that LinkedIn is the biggest facilitator of workplace discrimination?
- Comment on Rate it 2 months ago:
Why is the cat a little bastard?
- Comment on Hey is Sharing Luigi’s Manifesto on Social Media Actually "Glorifying Violence"? Because Reddit Said So 😭 3 months ago:
Glorifying violence is A-Ok when the government awards people the Medal of Honor.
Reddit needs to come up with a more accurate excuse for their censorship.
- Comment on What do people (as in, IRL) actually think of the [alleged] perpetrator involved in the NYC shooting? 3 months ago:
I find it pretty improbable that you’ve never seen a video of Hitler.
- Comment on What do people (as in, IRL) actually think of the [alleged] perpetrator involved in the NYC shooting? 3 months ago:
Anyone that has an opinion on someone they’ve never listened to has an opinion that should equally not be listened to.
- Comment on Does anyone else think the NYPD photos of the UHC CEO shooting suspect don’t match? 3 months ago:
I mean, typically I’d agree with you, but there’s a small chance that this is smarter than a lot of people are initially thinking (but still fucked up none the less) … maybe someone at NYPD found a video / picture of a dude that they know was not the dude. Maybe they have evidence that the guy in this picture in the green jacket is 100% innocent. Maybe they arrest him, his lawyer gets him out and they all of a sudden have no leads at all. Cold case.
- Comment on Do you want the murderer of the UnitHealthcare CEO prosecuted? 3 months ago:
✌️
- Comment on Do you want the murderer of the UnitHealthcare CEO prosecuted? 3 months ago:
The murderer was shot and killed.
- Comment on Do you want the murderer of the UnitHealthcare CEO prosecuted? 3 months ago:
If murderers got prosecuted equally this CEO should have had a day in court years ago.
- Comment on Do you want the murderer of the UnitHealthcare CEO prosecuted? 3 months ago:
No, but I hope someone makes him a cool cape or something of the sorts.