There are still people playing the lute and all kinds of other historic instruments. There must be a group of devoted flatulists out there? I'm not just saying any old farters, I'm talking true flatulists.
Quite a talent
Submitted 6 months ago by ickplant@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/4b5076f4-72aa-4e99-9274-06b0fcf6a798.jpeg
Comments
ivanafterall@kbin.social 6 months ago
ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 6 months ago
If my family is any indication, there are underemployed flatulists out there, farting at jobs that don’t support them for their contributions.
vox@sopuli.xyz 6 months ago
well there’s
letsgo@lemm.ee 6 months ago
I’ve been known to knock out a several second solo on the rectaphone. Doesn’t tend to be at will though (well I don’t want him to slap me).
elxeno@lemm.ee 6 months ago
ivanafterall@kbin.social 6 months ago
Truly, the brightest flame burns the quickest.
loudWaterEnjoyer@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 months ago
I am a true flatulist. I would love to play you the sound of my people. You know one could say that I kinda admire you, so I wrote a song just for you. It would be an honor to perform.
Batting1000@lemmy.world 6 months ago
Imagine being the king, and you’ve got that one friend you want to put on payroll, but their only claim to fame is farting.
ilost7489@lemmy.ca 6 months ago
Bumbulum is suck a great word
Rusty@lemmy.ca 6 months ago
Whoa, Black Betty
sjmarf@sh.itjust.works 6 months ago
“Bulum” means “instrument”, so it literally means “bum instrument”
veloxization@yiffit.net 6 months ago
It’s a bulum out of the bum.
PhlubbaDubba@lemm.ee 6 months ago
Man, things really were a bore before radio huh?
Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 6 months ago
it was genuinely so fucking boring that people were more than happy to give any visiting traveller free food and housing so long as they told some stories and news, you could straight up live your life as a travelling storyteller because everyone was so dreadfully desperate for some entertainment.
funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 6 months ago
I mean that is still the case now with celebrities, just the “give them stuff” now is outsourced.
Sanctus@lemmy.world 6 months ago
I need to see a performance of one jump, one whistle, and one fart
Sanctus@lemmy.world 6 months ago
Also, does fart originated from flatulence art?
FantasmaNaCasca@lemmy.world 6 months ago
Life will not be the same after this.
A close elevator is now an excusite art gallery.My basketball team used to do great fart performances in the van before the out-games. Truly amazing people. Material for Fartronauts.
ivanafterall@kbin.social 6 months ago
I am impressed at the control you'd have to have to not only fart on command, but to fart so consistently that it is considered a specific performance with a name. "Oh, I love this one!" It's amazing.
downdaemon@lemmy.ml 6 months ago
Totally shit his pants at least once before he got good at it
GBU_28@lemm.ee 6 months ago
You know that dude ate what he knew made his trumpet bump it for days prior to the audience with the king
ickplant@lemmy.world 6 months ago
I wonder if he was lactose intolerant. Either way, he found a way to monetize it.
GoosLife@lemmy.world 6 months ago
Last week, I was watching a live taping of a comedy podcast, where a couple of journalists tell crazy stories from history.
They were doing the story of serial scammer, Frank Abergnale, aka the guy Leonardo DiCaprio plays in Catch Me If You Can. The problem with this story is that Frank Abergnale might be full of shit in his own right, as the only source for much of his story is based on his self-biography, which is very likely not true.
The hosts take turns researching and telling the stories, while the other one listens. This week, the storyteller was the lactose intolerant guy. So, because he knew his story was gonna be a lot of bullshit, he had brought a packet of 18 cheap cheeses. So if the listening host got a whiff of this being a lie, he would be able to call bullshit, and the storytelling host would have to eat one of the cheeses as punishment on behalf of Mr. Abergnale.
All this to say that this comment made me realize, we still have jesters and flatulists today. We just call them comedians and podcast hosts.
Klear@sh.itjust.works 6 months ago
I can’t decide if Abergnale making everything up makes him a lesser scammer or even better than we thought.
hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone 6 months ago
I looked up what flatulists are, and I’m happy to announce that I have found my dream job.
Akasazh@feddit.nl 6 months ago
Performance anxiety and stage fright would do me in personally.
trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 6 months ago
Depending on your response to anxiety, those could be performance enhancing
Agent641@lemmy.world 6 months ago
Id overcommit and shit my pants in front of the king
dudinax@programming.dev 6 months ago
Imagine 20 years on, he’s an established country gentleman, married with grown children, and he still has to ride to court every Christmas to fart for the king.
7heo@lemmy.ml 6 months ago
Notable flatulists: two Brits and a French. I dunno you, but they seem full of shit.
captain_aggravated@sh.itjust.works 6 months ago
Actually being full of shit is probably bad for your career as a flatulist.
GoosLife@lemmy.world 6 months ago
Or good, depending on how gross the king is
Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 6 months ago
I love these inspirational stories. Puts some spark back into a guy’s dreams.
Jubei_K_08@lemmy.world 6 months ago
What’s the musical symbol for a vibrato on that instrument?
Blackout@kbin.run 6 months ago
You add a ~ above the note
ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 6 months ago
The same as the symbols for the other end of the tube.
jonasw@discuss.tchncs.de 6 months ago
🗯️
wesker@lemmy.sdf.org 6 months ago
I’m so good, my wife gives me the couch to sleep on.
Old_Dude@lemmy.world 6 months ago
One jump, one whistle, and one fart was the highest level of entertainment at the time I guess. I’m glad human entertainment has evolved beyond the humor level of my six year old son.
Nfamwap@lemmy.world 6 months ago
Farts are funny, that is a universal constant.
Quadhammer@lemmy.world 6 months ago
universal content
Not so funny when it’s just two of you in an escape pod
ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 months ago
One Jump, One Whistle, One Fart
Didn’t George Thorogood cover that song?
LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 6 months ago
I have more impressive talents than that. I can haz house please?
BedSharkPal@lemmy.ca 6 months ago
To be fair I think this talent may be firmly in 'you had to be there territory.
phorq@lemmy.ml 6 months ago
If you fart in the woods and nobody is around to hear it… is it automatically deadly?
umbrella@lemmy.ml 6 months ago
til flatulists exist. made my day.
AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 6 months ago
On his business cards, he would put his title as “bumbulist”
TankovayaDiviziya@lemmy.world 6 months ago
Where can I learn this power?
ThePyroPython@lemmy.world 6 months ago
Google Mr. Methane.
Learn the forbidden art and secure your plot of land from King Charles.
lugal@lemmy.ml 6 months ago
I wonder how to measure farts. What makes a good fart? The length, loudness, smell or just that you can do it at command?
SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 6 months ago
I’d say that the ability to fart on command would take the proverbial cake.
brbposting@sh.itjust.works 6 months ago
TheHottub@lemmy.world 6 months ago
Well, there are two schools of thought. Smell vs Sound.
Mr_Dr_Oink@lemmy.world 6 months ago
Wow! I would have been a king a century ago!
Sam_Bass@lemmy.ml 6 months ago
So jumpin jack flash wasnt actually a jack
Rolando@lemmy.world 6 months ago
My ancestor?
Hossenfeffer@feddit.uk 6 months ago
… and yet when I do a beautiful bottom burp in front of King Charlie-come-lately I get hauled away by the Royal Protection Squad
Thcdenton@lemmy.world 6 months ago
“Roland, King Henry’s farting jester” 🎵
Kolanaki@yiffit.net 6 months ago
Imagine farting so good, it’s your profession.
“What do you, Steve?”
“I am a flatulist.”
“Oh you play the flute?”
Mr_Fish@lemmy.world 6 months ago
“I am the instrument”
“… so, you’re a singer”
“I’m a singer doing a handstand”
GoosLife@lemmy.world 6 months ago
This is the kind of material the king is looking for. How are your farts?