Stupid. This dude has the cleanest dick in the country.
“Eew this penis is too clean to go inside my body” that’s what this whiny bitch sounds like.
No, they totally SHOULD leave. They are clearly too filthy for this CLEAN KING.
I know it's one of you guys
Submitted 11 months ago by ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/4e022c1f-8653-44cf-beae-15f9f2b475d7.jpeg
Comments
Draegur@lemm.ee 11 months ago
FeetinMashedPotatoes@lemmy.world 11 months ago
“yeah baby you like my baby smooth dick?”
nonplayablecharacter7334@lemmy.world 11 months ago
CLEAN KINGS RISE UP.
YOU DROPPED THIS KING 👑 🧼 👀
Draegur@lemm.ee 11 months ago
/> Implication: dropped soap
/> Implication: you picked it up
/> Implication: and you did it for himB A S E D
Shayeta@feddit.de 11 months ago
Hey, at least you can be sure it’s clean.
EyIchFragDochNur@feddit.de 11 months ago
Because real men wait until marriage to masturbate
bobs_monkey@lemm.ee 11 months ago
I mean, it just never occured to me to drill a hole in a bar of soap, lotion and Palmela Handerson work just fine.
Lemminary@lemmy.world 11 months ago
That’s funny. We say Manuela in Spanish because “mano” means hand
GutsBerserk@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Made me lol 😆
MrGG@lemmy.ca 11 months ago
He’d end up disappointed that her pussy doesn’t bubble during sex, anyway.
the_joeba@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Is it… not supposed to?
Death_Equity@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Whoever your point of reference is, tell them to go to the doctor.
Pinklink@lemm.ee 11 months ago
That’s just a handhold so you don’t drop it
Slovene@feddit.nl 11 months ago
Mmm, soapussy …
pigup@lemmy.world 11 months ago
We live in a societussy
CCF_100@sh.itjust.works 11 months ago
What a terrible day to have eyes
100_percent_a_bot@lemmy.world 11 months ago
“It’s a part of me and I can wash it however fast I like!"
Lemminary@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Or long… Or hard… 😏
MindSkipperBro12@lemmy.world 11 months ago
How else are you suppose to clean it?
KingJalopy@lemm.ee 11 months ago
Soap is abrasive. His dick fucked up.
psud@aussie.zone 11 months ago
You’re using the wrong soap in your shower
voracitude@lemmy.world 11 months ago
It’s not that it’s abrasive, though some soaps do have abrasives in them for “exfoliation” and that is also bad for the dick. The problem is that it strips all the oils from your skin, and oil is what keeps skin stretchy. You fuck a bar of soap (or use soap as lube, whatever) it’ll strip all the oils off your genitals and then the minute the skin goes to stretch (like if you’re fucking, or masturbating, or get aroused) - RRRRIPPPP, microtears and friction burns everywhere.
saltnotsugar@lemm.ee 11 months ago
Look, if there’s a more subtle cock soap, I’m all ears.
icerunner_origin@startrek.website 11 months ago
If you’re all ears, how would you propose to use the soap?
Introversion@kbin.social 11 months ago
Perhaps he’s Ferengi?
jaybone@lemmy.world 11 months ago
You don’t have to propose, you can just keep it casual.
ohlaph@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I didn’t know that was an option.
Thcdenton@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Chill he was just blowing bubbles
johker216@lemmy.world 11 months ago
He also knows Bubbles? Small world!
Lemminary@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Hi, I’m Bubbles.
Thcdenton@lemmy.world 11 months ago
PP_BOY_@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Yeah leave bitch, he clearly doesn’t need you
art@lemmy.world 11 months ago
At least it’s clean.
InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Innocent, I’m not that big.
ObviouslyNotBanana@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Stop bragging, I can’t even afford soap
InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I can spell that from my instance.
qyron@sopuli.xyz 11 months ago
Don’t kink shame.
Death_Equity@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Soapysexuals are people too.
BuffLemmyworlder@lemmy.world 11 months ago
His penis will burn from that
Koordinator_O@lemmy.world 11 months ago
you talking out of experience? 😏
Enzy@lemm.ee 11 months ago
Ever tried perfume free soap?
BuffLemmyworlder@lemmy.world 11 months ago
No
Arthur_Leywin@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Not if he’s cleaning the foreskin.
BuffLemmyworlder@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I suppose you could say that hypothetically
ASeriesOfPoorChoices@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Soap on a rope, but slipped off the rope?
KISSmyOS@lemmy.world 11 months ago
How else are you gonna tie the rope to it?
JustMy2c@lemm.ee 11 months ago
The butt cleaning rope?
kttnpunk@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Poor dude probably just dug out the prize lol
Asafum@feddit.nl 11 months ago
“Drink more Ovaltine?! But this is soap!”
Shadywack@lemmy.world 11 months ago
There was a head out alright.
postmateDumbass@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I just have one question,
What did you do with the rest of the sculpted butter bust we had made for grandma’s wake?
Mr_Dr_Oink@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Dont you guys have shag soap?
VioletRing@kbin.social 11 months ago
Mama Ridgeway would be proud of that clean ween!
Aggravationstation@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Bobby Willy!
madmax666@lemmy.world 11 months ago
She must want that stank dick
lightnsfw@reddthat.com 11 months ago
How else am I supposed to lather up my dick?
Daft_ish@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Its like square cut pizza, the best slices are in the middle.
CuttingBoard@sopuli.xyz 11 months ago
Irish Wang.
Enzy@lemm.ee 11 months ago
Genius
ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I know it’s a joke but if this was a man posting a dildo with the same text he’d get flamed
Sprucie@feddit.uk 11 months ago
If it was a bar of soap moulded into a cock though we’d probably be seeing a pretty similar post
ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Rubbing soap on your dick is safe though.
Sticking soap up your snizz is how you get an infection.
baduhai@sopuli.xyz 11 months ago
It would be pretty impressive, though.
saigot@lemmy.ca 11 months ago
Dildo shampoo bottles are relatively commonplace though.
Fuckfuckmyfuckingass@lemmy.world 11 months ago
Idk man, fucking a bar of soap, clearly on the reg , and leaving it for the world to see is a bit different. Plus I feel like most dildo users have the presence of mind to put that shit up when they’re done.
shalafi@lemmy.world 11 months ago
That was made that way for the joke. How would you even begin fucking a flat bar of soap? Even pre-drilled, it would wear out too fast to be any fun.
Don’t use conditioner guys!!!
For the 4th time (I’m an idiot) I got serious dick issues. Don’t know if it dries the skin out or what, but the end gets hypersensitive, turns dark red, skin turns black and peels off, hurts like hell, and then you get nice, new pink skin. It’s painful and revolting and takes about a week for the whole process.
Thought was just me until I saw a reddit post a few months back. LOTS of dudes experiencing the same exact thing.
Don’t use conditioner guys!!!
ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 11 months ago
My ex would disagree as she’d leave hers lying out even when we had company over.
We were both also very mental unwell so that could be a part of it
garbagebagel@lemmy.world 11 months ago
When my sister and I lived with my parents our shower broke for a bit so we had to use my parents’ shower for a few days. Guess who forgot to take their dildo out of there… It was my sister not me but lucky for her and unlucky for me, my parents never clarified so they’ll just think what they will.
captainlezbian@lemmy.world 11 months ago
If this were a woman posting a dildo she’d get flamed. Use sex toys all you want, but don’t fuck soap, it’s ironically unsanitary
ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 11 months ago
I’ve covered that aspect already in other comment chains.
Also this picture is clearly a joke. You wouldn’t be able to actually use that to masturbate as the hole would grow rapidly. You’d have to lather your hands first using either bar or liquid soap.
Yeah jamming your dick into a solid bar of soap is gonna cause a lot of issues. The one I’d imagine being the first to worry about is your dick getting bruised cause bar soap ain’t exactly soft
scottywh@lemmy.world 11 months ago
A shower dildo left there to be found? No… that’d be fuckin weird too
Ledivin@lemmy.world 11 months ago
If it was a dildo sculpted out of soap, we’d have the exact same replies as here.