I’ll do you one better:
Imagine you’re born and you’re a crab who parasitizes the rectum of one of these.
Their name is Spike.
Submitted 4 days ago by fossilesque@mander.xyz to science_memes@mander.xyz
https://mander.xyz/pictrs/image/b0469310-5a44-4d06-ae54-3dbbf90c4d68.jpeg
Comments
TheTechnician27@lemmy.world 4 days ago
Bonus@mander.xyz 4 days ago
Imagine you’re a human who pays top dollar to consume its gonads.
TheTechnician27@lemmy.world 4 days ago
ahem
I could go look this up, but frankly, it’s your job now: elaborate, please.
IAmNorRealTakeYourMeds@lemmy.world 4 days ago
there are some scifi biological spaceships, they look cool and amazing.
but using then is akin to being those rectal parasites.
PapaStevesy@lemmy.world 3 days ago
What about the Treeships from Hyperion? Plants don’t have rectums. Also, as long as you help the ship out a little, it’s symbiotic instead of parasitic.
Bipauler@sh.itjust.works 4 days ago
Gives a whole new meaning to the expression ‘eat shit’
GreatTitEnthusiast@mander.xyz 4 days ago
Isn’t that just the original meaning?
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Wait this is important I am not a carb biologism but I would like to successfully imitate one someday. Which of the five crab families is this one from
anon_8675309@lemmy.world 3 days ago
I wouldn’t know anything else so I wouldn’t care.
Kolanaki@pawb.social 3 days ago
Imagine you’re the first person to actually get reincarnated, and you return as this with all knowledge of your previous life.
okwhateverdude@lemmy.world 3 days ago
pure fucking bliss
burlemarx@lemmygrad.ml 3 days ago
Meaning that I just need to chill and feed from particles from the water instead of having to slave myself off for wage so a billionaire could dream of going Mars while trying to destroy the very planet we currently live. Don’t know what to think, but in Spike’s place I’d think that we actually need to do is a revolution!
null@piefed.nullspace.lol 4 days ago
Oh, that’s kiki
okwhateverdude@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Definitely not bouba
Quibblekrust@thelemmy.club 3 days ago
You have no fear. There’d be no point to it. All your defenses are passive. Fear is meant to inspire sudden action. You’re incapable of that, so your kind discarded that emotion millennia ago.
While holding an exquisite level of peace in your tiny mind, a fisherman plucks you out of the water so some rich dude can eat your gonads.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Wait is that all I needed to do to get some rich dude to eat part of my gonad collection?
deft@lemmy.wtf 3 days ago
Wait… Part?
fiat_lux@lemmy.zip 4 days ago
I don’t appreciate having my photo posted without my permission, Isaac.
fckreddit@lemmy.ml 4 days ago
I think I will be okay because I wouldn’t have a nervous system that can think at that level, porbably
Hupf@feddit.org 3 days ago
Imagine you’re born and you’re this
pedz@lemmy.ca 3 days ago
This looks like a shadow vessel from B5.
Hupf@feddit.org 3 days ago
It is.
Zink@programming.dev 2 days ago
But then I could go around asking “what do you want?” with a suspicious smirk in my face!
PM_ME_VINTAGE_30S@anarchist.nexus 4 days ago
daannii@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Ever see the underside of these on a fishtank side?
I did once at a fish pet store.
I remember it looking like a hundred tiny suction cups.
But I can’t seem to find a good photo. This was the best I could find. Check out a real one if you get a chance.
KumaLumaJuma@feddit.uk 3 days ago
It’s the mouth and the anus!
innermeerkat@jlai.lu 3 days ago
P1k1e@lemmy.world 3 days ago
…I’m literally about to travel there for the first time…wish me luck
DivineChaos100@hexbear.net 4 days ago
Not having to go to work.
cypherpunks@lemmy.ml 3 days ago
don’t threaten me with a good time
webghost0101@sopuli.xyz 3 days ago
Apparantly these are a local delicatesse in some regions…
So we caught one with the mindset to see if we could barbecue it and when we placed it on the table it started to move and wiggle its needles.
We thought it was similar to fungi, technically not plant but pretty much a plant… we quickly brought it back to the ocean.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Yeah I am told urchin (that’s what we’re looking at, right?) is delicious.
acockworkorange@mander.xyz 1 day ago
MissJinx@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Envy is a sin dude! Who wouldn’t want to look this metal and NOT pay rent?
SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 3 days ago
You can do both today
Una@europe.pub 3 days ago
Based
chirayu_alias@lemmy.zip 3 days ago
*makes the noise of a catcalling porcupine
WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 4 days ago
If I am correct about my cosmological theory.
We will all have a turn.
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 days ago
Both eating and being eaten, or being both the urchin genital and the sushi chef?
WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 3 days ago
Both the urchin and chef literally. We don’t need no cosmic horror stories, all our actions are nullified, and rendered the same. There is no way to escape eternal pain and tragedy.
Nangijala@feddit.dk 1 day ago
Whenever I start feeling sorry for myself about hardships in life I remind myself that I’m lucky that life exists, that I got to be born at all, that I was born as part of the most intelligent species on Earth and I was born in a country where I have every opportunity to have a good life.
I could’ve been an ant or I could’ve been nothing at all.
Malyca@lemmy.zip 3 days ago
If I come back I wanna be spike
heartSagan5@lemmy.zip 4 days ago
And their testicles are yummy: “uni”
YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.today 3 days ago
Just about to say this. Luckily they’re 90% genital! More nut per ball if you will.
Floodedwomb@lemmy.world 3 days ago
You could never be born a sea urchin. They dont even breed, they just squirt gametes in to the water and hope for the best.
apotheotic@beehaw.org 3 days ago
Imagine looking like a demonstration of magnets with iron shavings
HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 days ago
I’d name them Fluffles
CookieOfFortune@lemmy.world 3 days ago
An Immense World by Ed Yong talks about this.
Dymonika@lemmy.ml 3 days ago
Interesting, thanks for the recommendation; I’d never heard of this before.
LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 4 days ago
How landlords and asshole bosses are reincarnated?
BoxedFenders@hexbear.net 4 days ago
Could be worse. You could be born whatever that thing is, but without the protective spikes.
Ghostwurm@lemmy.ca 4 days ago
I’d like some of that sweet, sweet, urchin purpose for existence.
stringere@sh.itjust.works 3 days ago
…and all you want is to cuddle…
Miller@lemmy.world 4 days ago
Does it have to get up after four hours sleep to work all day and go to IKEA at the weekend or does it just mess around it’s whole life in a warm ocean eating seafood and thinking gentle echinoid thoughts.
LovableSidekick@lemmy.world 4 days ago
Until it gets torn apart and eaten alive by something else, literally dying by getting chewed to death - pretty much the way of nature.
Miller@lemmy.world 3 days ago
In the end the world chews us all up and we die screaming and alone in our heads. Have a nice Sunday evening.
conartistpanda@lemmy.world 3 days ago
That nature thing sounds bad. Can we get rid of it?
xylol@leminal.space 4 days ago
More like I must consume everything thoughts