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I know Reddit sucks but this one is funny.

⁨1089⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/77d3ea78-a687-4392-a2b6-0fb4722928ea.jpeg

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Comments

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  • Obituarykidney@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I used a photo I found online from my local governments department of transport. The name was “Sam S. Sample” with a photo of Mr Bean. So far Reddit, discord, and pornhub have all accepted it.

    I’m in my 30s but fuck giving my government ID to random American corporations with a history of data breaches.

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    • BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I’ve never had to do that other than actual government organizations. It must be American.

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      • Obituarykidney@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        I am in Australia where they have banned under 16s from using social media and porn. In reality it’s just forced adults to upload ID to various websites and kids just use vpns

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    • f4f4f4f4f4f4f4f4@sopuli.xyz ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Where I am in the US, for more than 10 years, cashiers have been scanning IDs for age verification of tobacco and alcohol. So even if you pay cash, your identity is tied to those purchases.

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    • asdfasdfasdf@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      fuck giving my government ID to random American corporations with a history of data breaches.

      FTFY

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    • takeda@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Wait, Reddit requires ID? As for pornhub I guess you love in one of those states?

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      • Obituarykidney@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        For nsfw subreddits/profiles, yes. But literally anyone marking their post as nsfw even to hide a spoiler would prompt the ID check making the subreddit unusable until that post was gone.

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      • bedwyr@piefed.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Even in places they aren’t required to take you id by law, they collect EVERYTHING about you. They know already. They know, you are the product.

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    • protogen420@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      pornhub?

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      • lemmysir@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        It’s a website that hosts pornographic content.

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      • WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Don’t worry, your wife believed your post.

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    • lyralycan@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Wish I could’ve used this method to regain OnlyFans access – their verifier took multiple photos of my head for a 3D scan, and the site geolocks its users like Steam, so VPNs wouldn’t work.

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      • LogicalDrivel@sopuli.xyz ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        If a site ever asked me to submit a full head scan, I don’t think I would ever go back to it.

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      • houndeyes@toast.ooo ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        their verifier took multiple photos of my head for a 3D scan

        They’re plan is to replace their creators with AI-generated content based on those scans.

        OnlyScans.

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      • danciestlobster@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Just switch to fansly, no verification required and almost all sellers who have a page on OF have a fansly too

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    • muhyb@programming.dev ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Years ago when I wanted to delete my Facebook account, they asked for an ID. I used McLovin driving license and it was done. It was the style at that time.

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  • isleepinahammock@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    This is actually a fun bit of historical trivia. That passport isn’t something someone just cooked up in Photoshop. It’s real.

    In 1976, his remains were issued an Egyptian passport (nearly 3 thousand years after his death) so that he could be transported to Paris for an irradiated treatment to prevent a fungoid growth.

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    • BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Oh goodness that’s funny.

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    • kernelle@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Image Credit – HeritageDaily (Please note, this is an artists recreation and is not the original passport)

      For anyone that missed it, this version was cooked up in Photoshop. But an actual version does exist

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    • MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Just put him back in his dry, cold grave.

      Making a 3000 year old mummy rely on hightech that wouldn’t last a 100 years, smh.

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      • isleepinahammock@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        (Sorry, your short comment inspired me. Sorry this ended up being so long.)

        I imagine it’s a hard balance to strike. These artifacts and mummies ultimately need guarding. They’ve been protected from the centuries only by obscurity alone. All the ancient tomb traps failed long ago. You could put him back in his tomb, but now you have to guard the tomb. Otherwise someone will break in there and steal it. Some oligarch would absolutely pay a fortune for the bragging rights of having Ramses II’s mummy on display in their villa. With the shear number of mummies and historical sites in Egypt, if you left things where they are, the Egyptian government would have to pay people to guard thousands of sites around the clock. And you then have to worry about the guards stationed at these isolated sites being bribed to look the other way as the thieves break in. (Or becoming thieves themselves.)

        Amusingly, the Egyptians of today seem to be in the exact same situation as those of 4,000 years ago. Almost all ancient royal graves were looted in antiquity. The discovery of King Tut’s tomb was such a hurricane specifically because it was the only royal tomb we’ve ever found that wasn’t looted. The ancient thieves were after gold and jewels. But today, if they put it up for auction, I imagine the mummy of Ramses II would probably sell for more than its own weight in gold. The ancient thieves mostly tore apart mummies to find jewelry buried within the wrappings. Today the mummies themselves are the jewelry. Ancient thieves robbed the pharaohs of their wealth. Modern thieves have come for the pharaohs themselves.

        It’s really just a security problem. Once you dig something up, you have to guard it. And it’s a lot easier to guard a hundred mummies in one museum than it is to guard a hundred mummies at a hundred different tombs scattered throughout the countryside.

        Sure, you could just say, “screw it, no more archaeology, we’re just leaving everything in the ground!” But then again, thieves can excavate tombs just as archaeologists can. And if you never reveal the ancient secrets, if living people never get to see these ancient mummies and artifacts, practically that’s little different than letting the treasures be looted. Morally I’m not particularly concerned about disturbing ancient graves. I don’t believe in ancient curses, or that we will be disturbing the real afterlife of a pharaoh by doing whatever we want to his corpse. To me these are just inanimate objects. Their worth comes entirely from the value they have in the present and future as the cultural heritage of the Egyptian people (fuck the British Museum). An artifact left forever in the ground, never again to be seen by living human eyes? To me that has no more worth than any random rock.

        Living human beings are what provide value and worth to inanimate objects, even if those inanimate objects used to be human beings. I don’t support looting recent graves or the ancient burials still revered by modern people (like ancient Native American burial sites.) But if the actual living indigenous people are OK with it? If they’re the ones leading the effort? If we’re not going to hurt any living people by digging up an ancient tomb? I’m all for it. Graves are for the living, not the dead. If it wouldn’t cause pain to my own friends and family, I would be completely OK with someone just chucking my corpse in a garbage bin after I’m gone. I don’t need it anymore. To me, it’s literally trash.

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  • Angryhumanoid@fedinsfw.app ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Well he’s clearly over the age range, I don’t see an issue.

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    • MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      It’s clearly expired!

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      • Angryhumanoid@fedinsfw.app ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Well that just means they’re even older!

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  • gnufuu@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Hopefully whatever platform they signed up for isn’t owned by the bloody Hittites

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    • Jankatarch@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Funny enough, there are villages in eastern Anatolia that are not on the government maps.

      They do trade with other towns and have gas, cars etc but population is mainly native to the land like Kurdish.

      So there are actual non-zero chances that there is some hidden ancient Hittite village last recorded by Alexander the Great’s empire, and Persians or Romans who conquered a fort nearby later didn’t survey that particular location, so it kinda has been sitting there enjoying not paying any taxes; and an actual bloody hittite could leave their town today to go work at tumblr hq.

      At least in my historic fanfic that I just came up with.

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      • gnufuu@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        Was about to say how much I love it when a random shitpost leads to an insightful comment by an actual expert in a very niche topic. Then read your last sentence. Well played.

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  • expatriado@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    thanks to France, they required the passport to be transferred there, so Egypt printed one

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    • balsoft@lemmy.ml ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Also, sadly it’s not a real passport. You can tell (at a minimum) because the first machine-readable passports were issued in 1980, and Egypt didn’t start issuing MRPs until 2008.

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  • Donkter@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Yeah I’ve seen a bunch of these. It’s pretty clear that ID verification is just a drag net to catch the uninformed or stupid people which is going to be like 70% of traffic anyway.

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  • EarJava@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Even the expiration date isn’t correct

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    • LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I let my license expire once by accident. Found out when I was running an insta cart order after work. Figure if I’m going to already drive 50 miles home, mine as well have some stops and make back the gas money. Finished shopping and the person at the counter told me I couldn’t check out because I may have been in my mid thirties last week, but that has since expired so I am infact no longer a person, lol.

      Pain in the ass.

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  • NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    🎶 The man is gauze! The man in gauze! 🎶

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    • rindo25@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      youtu.be/tVQ0niE_dSo?is=dVqvWtfyo80-qoEL

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    • its_kim_love@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      What’s your offer?!

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    • QuantumSparkles@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Don’t you mean banana gods

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      • its_kim_love@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

        I always thought it said ‘Commands the Gods’ as a kid

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    • Tyro@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Thank you! I came to the comments for this :)

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  • huquad@lemmy.ml ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Return the slab

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  • Jankatarch@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    “That man belongs in the british museum.”

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    • samus12345@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Image

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  • timmaeus@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    This age verification garbage is actually the (final) reason why I moved to Lemmy lol

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  • mtpender@piefed.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    He has a license to drive a chariot between Sunrise and Sunset.

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  • DarkCloud@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    How can this be! The AI used to search the image is top notch! It’s the LATEST tech!

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  • trainsrkool@lemmy.ml ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    thats how we get cursed, do you want to get cursed?!?!

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    • mtpender@piefed.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      “Return The Slab, or suffer my curse…”

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  • Ertain@mast.linuxgamecast.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    @BonesOfTheMoon I have to admit, that's very clever.

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  • omega_x3@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Picture taken sometime after defeating the sea people

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  • jaybone@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I’ve never seen anyone put their profession on their passport.

    I suspect this might be fake.

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    • RandomStickman@fedia.io ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Apparently profession is a field in a regular Egyptian passport lmao

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    • openchan@piefed.social ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Or the fact that it says deceased lmao

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    • mustbe3to20signs@feddit.org ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Afaik it was issued only to appease (British or French) custom and borders agencies. Ramses II was send to another country for research and even deceased humans require an ID to enter the receiving country.

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  • Heinous@feddit.online ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    passport number should be A00000001

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  • Anti_Iridium@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I fucked up and in a moment of desperation to buy an age controlled substance I uploaded mine to a verifier.

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  • nullspace@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I don’t think it’s necessary to say Twitter sucks when posting a screenshot of a tweet.

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    • JasonDJ@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Twitter?

      Never met her.

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  • justme@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    let’s imagine the post is genuine: did the verification algorithm actually parse the “… BC” and thought “yeah, that’s old enough” or does it only check for the existence of an id? i never had to deal with this nonsense, so don’t know.

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