JasonDJ

@JasonDJ@lemmy.zip

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨This is real⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨day⁩ ago⁩:

  Gotta love renting. Help a friend get back on their feet for a bit after life throws them through the wringer?

  Too bad, so sad, your turn in the wringer.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨thank goodness⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Everywhere I go in America, seems that all their beverages are measured in Florida Ounces.

  How is that different than a normal US ounce, or the ounce I would get at a dispensary (which of course wouldn’t be in Florida!)?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Shit's so deep...⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Buoys.

  It’s a dumb joke.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I don't care if you can't provide for your family! You WILL provide for me!⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Winston Purrchil.

  Or Margaret Cheshire. I don’t want to assume their gender.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨it's time⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  That must be a very delicate balance since it must expend more energy to fly if the bird is heavier.

  But I remember hearing about the amazing migratory flights of some small birds where, if they traveled non-stop, they’d be going like 35mph for like two days with no breaks. So it must be working well for them.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨No excuses⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  In a lot of areas I go through regularly they’re way more likely to light you up if they see you brake hard when you see them posted up than if you just cruise past them at a reasonable speed even if it’s technically over the limit.

  Good.

  That’s my biggest problem with speed traps. People see them and immediately hit their brakes, regardless of which lane they’re in or how fast they are going.

  That is far, far, far more dangerous. The absolute most important rule of driving, IMO, is one that is never taught and never thought about: be predictable. The most dangerous driver isnt the one that’s just speeding. It’s the one driving erratically.

  If everyone is driving properly, the only reason you should see brake lights in the passing lane is when there’s gridlock or stop and go traffic.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I spent weeks setting up a night break in and and now I find THIS⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Image

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨It's about time we showed concern for the men⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  I swear I smelled pregnancy on my wife’s breath both times. It’s a weird smell. Like…burnt plastic?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Thanks, just sent this to my wife.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨⁩ ⁨⁨5⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  But what about adipose tissue?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨A handy chart⁩ ⁨⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Yeah sure who needs tides?

  In fact, theres a chance that the climate catastrophe from destroying the moon would offset the effects of anthropogenic climate change. Not a very good chance, like 0.00000001%, but still better than everything else we’re doing.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨These mugs are getting out of hand⁩ ⁨⁨6⁩ ⁨days⁩ ago⁩:

  Roughly equal to 1000 metric teaspoons.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Fell off the horizon into a black hole⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  It’s flat, sure, except for all the wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey stuff.

• My (incredibly divisive) dessert choicelemmy.zip ↗
  Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩ | ⁨23⁩ ⁨comments⁩
• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Finally I understand it⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  30 generations ago required over 500k mating pairs. And all that gene juice eventually trickled down to you.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨And the pre-peeled containers for 4x the price are a ripoff⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  Not all chefs. Some cover their anger issues with drug addiction.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨facebook ai⁩ ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨week⁩ ago⁩:

  I think it’s the recommended search below the photo.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Lead⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Yep. That’s the guy.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Lead⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Tell me I’m crazy…but this reminds me of a standup routine about “tracheotomy [sic] man”.

  Except I can’t find any references to this online. I could’ve sworn it was some cringe/edgelord comic like Dane Cook or something.

  Am I hallucinating?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨I've ordered bucket of lava but they keep delivering different product⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Steve’s Lava Chicken.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Can you think of any now?⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Class of 2003.

  Food wheel was taught in elementary school. As were the taste bud “zones” and the American Dream.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Or the common cold!⁩ ⁨⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  In a way he’s right, the space race was really a dick-measuring contest against the ruskies to demonstrate launch capabilities.

  But yeah, we’ve gotten a lot more from NASA than just winning a dick-measuring contest.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨FIFY⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  You want a tip, here’s your tip: seize the means of production.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨oh the consequences of allergies⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Shrimp is already a sin jfc.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨No words⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Good Jew: Joseph Gordon-Levitt

  Bad Jew: Jared from Subway.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Rust⁩ ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Dihydrogen monoxide is like that too. 100% of the people who drink it die. And it’s even deadlier when inhaled, it only takes a relatively small amount.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨generation⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Hey man we all have our fetishes.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨✅✅✅⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  Isn’t this the cowboy actor John Oliver hired to do commercials aimed at Trump on Fox?

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨Scientific unprogress...⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  RFK going swimming with his granddaughter, in a sewage disharge outlet.

• ⁨Comment⁩ on ⁨A conundrum⁩ ⁨⁨4⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩:

  The alternative would probably be (much) higher interest rates until you get below 80% LTV at which point you’re “allowed” to refinance…but no bank will ever remind you of this in hopes you forget…or prime will skyrocket and you’ll be stuck in high interest for an unknown amount of time.

  I think you should put away the monkey paw before they get more inspiration.