I just realized that I can both make myself sneeze and make myself vomit. If I can do this simultaneously, I could spray partially-aerosolized stomach acid when I feel threatened.

Comments

• DoubleDongle@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  You’re gonna hurt yourself that way more than anyone else, but yeah, I’m not fucking with anyone who does that. It begs the question of how deep the rabbit hole of crazy goes, and I’ll pass on finding out. Nope.

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I’m not going to do it; I just realized that I could do it.

    Unlike some people around here, I have a little bit of self-control.

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    • myotheraccount@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Being able to decide when go puke and when not to sounds like you have a lot of self-control (much more than usual)

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    • icelimit@lemmy.ml ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      You could do it? Prove it. I dare you.

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    • HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      it seems like a skill you would need to practice mr turkey vulture

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  • snoons@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Perhaps their genome allows them to do so without any harm. OP needs to try and see.

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    • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      I plan on it

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  • W98BSoD@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Oh, hello rabbit hole!

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• Murse@slrpnk.net ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Out-crazy the crazy does seem to be an effective strategy. Your sinuses are NOT going to be happy with you though.

  On that note, if you’ve ever puked and got any of that acid up your nose, you know how absolutely horrible that feels: you’ll be pleased to know that you can almost completely block it from happening if you simply pinch your nose shut as the puke comes streaming out. By capping off the pressure at your nostrils, no fluid, be it air, snot, or stomach acid, will be able to travel from your oropharynx to your nasopharynx – you basically wall off the blue zone:

  Image

  Downside being that you gotta actually remember this trick as your guts are about to spill, which isn’t really a great time to call back on little lifehacks from the internet. If you happen to recall it in the stages leading up to go-time though, you’re golden.

  Also be careful not to gasp for air between streams of vomit, or you might inhale some. You don’t want stomach acid in your air way! Controlled, slow breaths.

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  • Dozzi92@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I literally cannot avoid vomiting through my nose (and mouth obviously) on the rare occasion it needs to happen. Because of this, I’ve been one of those people who fights it back for my entire life. I’ve never felt better after it, I always feel significantly worse. It’s a loud, violent, terrible ordeal, and I’m a little jealous of the folks who can do it with ease.

    I’ve read about the nose pinch. I need to try it. Because, unfortunately, it ain’t just stomach acid that ends up there. Really not great.

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    • Murse@slrpnk.net ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Same boat. You’ll still get a few drops up there, but it’ll be tolerable discomfort that you’ll be able to snort out over the minutes following eruption.

      Try to start thinking of this trick as soon as you start feeling nauseous. GL!

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Yeah I know

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• princess@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  now this is the kind of quality posting I come to lemmy for

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Me too

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• AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Evolution happening right before our eyes. In a few generations ops offsprings will be well trained stomach acid fighters.

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Well trained? Not good enough. They’ll be naturally gifted or else

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• bhamlin@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  You’re well on your way to becoming a llama!

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• Doomsider@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Once you sneeze vomit through your nose you will realize that you have fucked up.

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  • icelimit@lemmy.ml ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    To fuck someone up, you have to be ready to get fucked yourself.

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  • humorlessrepost@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Just need to train yourself with sinus-expanding powder.

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    • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      It’s like these people don’t even know or something

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  • Etterra@discuss.online ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    At least it’ll clear out their sinuses.

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• over_clox@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Odd that you would say that.

  Many years ago, I realized that if I take a Vitamin B12 pill, well almost exactly 23 minutes later, I’ll get like all the reflexes simultaneously.

  Burp, puke, hiccup, fart, sneeze (am I missing any?)

  All at once, simultaneously. The sensations would only last about 20 seconds, but those are 20 seconds of things I’d rather not experience, so I no longer take Vitamin B12…

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Interesting and noted for my future endeavors

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  • Triumph@fedia.io ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Cough. Queef. Exploding boil.

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    • over_clox@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Coughing is unfortunately semi-regular for me, I’m a smoker (don’t smoke kids, also don’t smoke, kids).

      I don’t have the organs to queef, unless that boil explodes…

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  • Feathercrown@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Bukkufneeze

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• regedit@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Congratulations on your new Dilphosaurus tag!

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    First of all, thanks for all the cool computer tricks when I was in highschool.

    Secondly, sneez-its in your face and runs away screaming

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    • regedit@lemmy.zip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Aaaaaahhhhhhh it smells awful!!!

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• snoons@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  I cast Aura of Endless Sneezing and Puking

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I cast awareness of butthole hair

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  • asqapro@reddthat.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Reminds me of the end of this video: youtube.com/watch?v=gAQSicsoEu0

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    • snoons@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      This is exactly what I was referencing :)

      Image

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• RandomStickman@fedia.io ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  The European roller chick will vomit a foul-smelling orange liquid onto itself to deter a predator. The smell also warns the parents on their return to the nest.

  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/European_roller?wprov=sfla1

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  • shpuncle@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Took me a moment to realize this wasn’t a satirical approach towards ladies on rollerblades

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    • arctanthrope@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      me too, I was like, damn this guy had a really bad date at the roller rink

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I also got excited about roller derby women until I realized what I was reading. And then I got really excited.

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• fleem@piefed.zeromedia.vip ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  how do ya make yourself sneeze?

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    I just think I need to sneeze and I do it. Not instant, but it usually happens within a few seconds.

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• Grail@multiverse.soulism.net ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  You should send an email to the slow-mo guys and offer to show their cameras

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  • Murse@slrpnk.net ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Image

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Ah that’s a good idea actually

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• riptwo@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  You could train the Absolute Batman version of Bruce Wayne to do this, because he had to use tools to achieve a similar effect.

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• OriginEnergySux@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  threatens you

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    🤧

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• Miller@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Its got a wonderful defence mechanism, you don’t dare kill it.

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• i_stole_ur_taco@lemmy.ca ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Ok. Now start designing an online course you can sell to self defence enthusiasts for $300. Do not waste this opportunity!

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    “And if you bring a friend I’ll give you 15% cash back. YOU’RE MAKING MONEY TO TAKE THIS CLASS”

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• icelimit@lemmy.ml ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  If you did this onto your steak, you could different it before needing to chew it, allowing you to make well done steaks of UK beef.

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    There’s an idea! Eat like a spider.

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• LemmyFeed@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Joke’s on you, I’m into that.

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Who doesn’t like sneezing?

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• Sunforged@lemmy.ml ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  Image

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Image

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    • Sunforged@lemmy.ml ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

      Image

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• bstix@feddit.dk ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

  If you also learn voluntary sharting you can make multi directional attack.

  Now that would surprise Pikachu.

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  • OldManBOMBIN@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago

    Ooooooooo… Multi-directional biohazard. It’s gonna be a busy weekend

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