Get stabbed Bleed out in a literal gutter $800 tho
Anon makes money
Submitted 7 months ago by RmDebArc_5@sh.itjust.works to greentext@sh.itjust.works
https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/406864b6-3059-46af-8186-abcba17e4524.jpeg
Comments
Socsa@sh.itjust.works 7 months ago
ICastFist@programming.dev 7 months ago
This anon is white
FilthyShrooms@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Fun trick! Don’t try in America!
gmtom@lemmy.world 7 months ago
If anything it would be easier in America.
Just shoot them the second they touch it. Even if they’re running away with it and you shoot them in the back you will gey away with it.
NoSpiritAnimal@lemmy.world 7 months ago
This protip only works for Cops
RecluseRamble@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 months ago
But then you have to move all the time. A pile of bodies might scare off bike thieves.
ArcaneSlime@lemmy.dbzer0.com 7 months ago
Disclaimer: This post advises you to commit crimes. Do not take this post as fact.
Disclaimer pt.2: You may get away with it “in Texas, at night, and on your own property,” but you have to hit all 3/3 of those, if you have 0/3, 1/3, or 2/3, you are also going to be prosecuted.
graymess@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Alternatively, run over with car. You can commit any crime while in a car and get away with it. It’s the law.
mrgreyeyes@feddit.nl 7 months ago
Do Americans even know how to ride a bicycle?
riodoro1@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Yes, but they don’t know how to change gears.
kungen@feddit.nu 7 months ago
Inexperienced, but possible. If only bikes worked the same way as America’s best anti-theft measure: a car with manual transmission.
echodot@feddit.uk 7 months ago
They just don’t know how to start it.
Flax_vert@feddit.uk 7 months ago
I remember there was some guy who installed spyware on a phone that couldn’t be wiped off by normal means. Stuff that gave him remote camera access, location, file access, everything. Then he got that phone stolen and made a documentary about this dude’s life.
Zomg@lemmy.world 7 months ago
I remember that, he installed it as a system app and would persist through a factory reset
Flax_vert@feddit.uk 7 months ago
I think it was baked into the OS somehow (probably what you said). He disabled system updates as well so the OS didn’t wipe. The only way it could have been removed was flashing the OS, but you’d have to find out it was there to begin with.
Legend@lemmy.sdf.org 7 months ago
Can someone share that video or article or whatever it is .
BeigeAgenda@lemmy.ca 7 months ago
herrwoland@lemmy.world 7 months ago
It’s all fun and games till the person who stole your bike has a weapon, or is bigger than you and has friends with them
papalonian@lemmy.world 7 months ago
I’ll take $75 of my profits and buy a shit new bike whenever someone I can’t beat up takes it
(I cannot beat up many people. I would not profit from this model.)
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 7 months ago
And they’re not going to steal a $75 bike, they steal nice bikes that have resell value.
KISSmyOSFeddit@lemmy.world 7 months ago
That’s just robbery with extra steps.
magnetosphere@fedia.io 7 months ago
I have questions
Hugh_Jeggs@lemm.ee 7 months ago
Answer - yes you DO need to clean under your foreskin
SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 7 months ago
but then all the flavor is gone
suction@lemmy.world 7 months ago
I understand the “kick a dude’s ass and take their wallet” part, but not why we need the bike with gps prelude
CapeWearingAeroplane@sopuli.xyz 7 months ago
I believe there’s a quote by “Taco” in"Better call Saul" along the lines of “I love robbing criminals, because they never go to the cops”
ameancow@lemmy.world 7 months ago
The problem with criminals is they are often stupid enough to go to the cops.
Cracks_InTheWalls@sh.itjust.works 7 months ago
It’s to make sure the victim deserves it.
Gullible@sh.itjust.works 7 months ago
Lemmy needs an out of context quotes community.
suction@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Ah now it makes total sense!
unreasonabro@lemmy.world 7 months ago
i guess you really do suck then lol
suction@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Not as hard as your mom servicing hobos under the highway bridge
ameancow@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Seriously, it’s just mugging. The bicycle part is a whole separate issue, if you do this you’re just mugging people. Same crime, same potential legal consequences, same potential for getting a sharpened screwdriver in your kidney.
Entropywins@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Kidney thing happened to you too, huh…
RegalPotoo@lemmy.world 7 months ago
The bike thief is probably less likely to go to the police? Idk
Imgonnatrythis@sh.itjust.works 7 months ago
I wish more people did this. Id watch this over to catch a predator any day
mriormro@lemmy.world 7 months ago
This is psychotic.
Delphia@lemmy.world 7 months ago
While I dont necessarily agree, I do agree that petty theft affects regular people all the damn time, you cant do anything about it or you can catch an assault charge, the cops cant or wont do anything about it either so you just have to accept that sometimes people are going to take your shit and nothing is going to happen.
It would be nice to know those people get their comeuppance from time to time.
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 7 months ago
Yeah, unless you’re a police department and are literally doing a sting operation, this is just robbing people with extra steps.
unreasonabro@lemmy.world 7 months ago
nah bike thieves are among the lowest of the low, among child abusers and oil execs. It’s one of the scummiest things you can do, hands down.
FartsWithAnAccent@fedia.io 7 months ago
New side quest unlocked!
swab148@startrek.website 7 months ago
Enh, repeatable fetch quests are boring.
Saledovil@sh.itjust.works 7 months ago
It’s a bounty hunting quest, though.
ryathal@sh.itjust.works 7 months ago
Criminals can’t call the cops…
gigachad@sh.itjust.works 7 months ago
4fe3b6b9-e60e-ef11-8100-8b81c820316e
morphballganon@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Thank you, was going to request this
ThePyroPython@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Too many pixels, I can’t read it.
Annoyed_Crabby@monyet.cc 7 months ago
I need it charred.
Wizard_Pope@lemmy.world 7 months ago
Done
Image