He must’ve copied it from gay tourists who did it in front of him! Surely it’s just a show of completely non-sexual dominance. They’re just really good friends. /s
This gay tortoise is older than the word “homosexual”
Submitted 2 months ago by andros_rex@lemmy.world to science_memes@mander.xyz
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/b739dc7d-81e1-4b7d-a3dc-366e195a3250.jpeg
Comments
Natanox@discuss.tchncs.de 2 months ago
andros_rex@lemmy.world 2 months ago
“It was just a dramatic thing to see,” Goldstein said of the male lions. He was astonished by Mutua’s remarks, declaring it “not normal” and attributing the behavior to demonic possession, or copying what he clearly believes is amoral human behavior.
“These animals need counselling, because probably they have been influenced by gays who have gone to the national parks and behaved badly,” said Mutua. “I don’t know, they must have copied it somewhere or it is demonic. Because these animals do not watch movies.”
“The demonic spirits inflicting in humans seems to have now caught up with the animals,” the film classification board director said. “That is why I will say isolate the crazy gay animals.”
SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 2 months ago
What an idiot.
Animals in the wild obviously watch movies.
kautau@lemmy.world 2 months ago
film classification board director
Oh well then say no more. That’s certainly a higher scientific certification than anyone else who could have anything to say on the matter
Dasus@lemmy.world 2 months ago
“That is why I will say isolate the crazy gay animals.”
Good luck, that guy. There are claims some 90% of giraffe sex is male on male.
NakariLexfortaine@lemm.ee 2 months ago
They’re enclosure-mates!
ShinkanTrain@lemmy.ml 2 months ago
He’s blind so he recognized gay sex just from hearing it and decided to try it out.
prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 months ago
And then when they’ve got nothing left, they ult:
Well, God made us in his image and that’s what separates us from the animals!
Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 1 month ago
reasonable, except i’m not made in the image of god, i was subcontracted out to zeus and we all know what he was like.
samus12345@lemm.ee 2 months ago
Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Do you have a source for that date? Those cars in the background don’t look like anything that would’ve existed in 1886. In fact the first car put into production was patented in 1886 and it looked like this:
Black and white image of the Benz Patent-Motorwagen, an early three-wheeled automobile
samus12345@lemm.ee 2 months ago
Oops, you’re absolutely right, I grabbed the wrong photo, Fixed.
GooberEar@lemmy.wtf 2 months ago
Is that a joke I’m too dumb to get?
samus12345@lemm.ee 2 months ago
No, I just think it’s cool to see an animal in such an old photo that’s still alive today.
drunkpostdisaster@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Okay, I am an ally and all. But when you are endangered ya just got to take one for the team
DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social 2 months ago
Close your eyes and think of the species
prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 months ago
Meh… As someone with no interest in having children and could not care less about what that might mean for my “bloodline,” I get it lol
CaptnNMorgan@lemmy.world 1 month ago
You’re bloodline doesn’t matter if you aren’t an endangered species. Lmao
Lucky_777@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Great now Jonathan will be on the deportion list.
andros_rex@lemmy.world 2 months ago
He’s already on an island in the middle of the ocean that’s so remote it wasn’t even occupied when the Europeans took it. St. Helena is where they sent Napoleon to try to keep him away.
ilovededyoupiggy@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
So the tariffs list, then?
dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
Deportation**
Unless he’s on the list to be aborted then deported, in which case you got it.
Lucky_777@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Thanks lol, fixed it
squirrel@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 months ago
100_kg_90_de_belin@feddit.it 2 months ago
Jonathan: “That dick better be hard and ready when I get there”
TeamAssimilation@infosec.pub 2 months ago
Dumb question: can his cataracts be fixed (a routine surgery on humans) so he can see his mate is a guy? As a bonus, he could see food morsels without the need of olfaction.
I also wonder if the loss of olfaction and sight mean he couldn’t recognize the sex of a partner even if it was right in front of him.
I understand he might really be a gay tortoise, but he could also be gay by necessity.
SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 2 months ago
He shares his space with a number of female tortoises.
He gay.
ragebutt@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
Tortoises use sight and have a good sense of sight to be fair but the also use scent from the cloaca to gather information about things like sex of a partner
he knows what he’s doing
SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 2 months ago
He can’t smell, either, but he’s been with that tortoise for over thirty years and snubs all the females around.
Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de 1 month ago
also like, the other tortoise is presumably not blind and anosmic, so it knows what’s going on and isn’t objecting.
or what do i know, maybe male tortoises become remarkably feminine with age?
SpaceNoodle@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Not covered by my previous comment:
Apparently doctors investigated cataract surgery several years ago, but deemed it too risky.
TeamAssimilation@infosec.pub 2 months ago
That’s sad, because it’s not like he could go blind from the surgery. He’s already blind. Most persons would risk the surgery if there was a chance to see again, I guess he would too if he could choose.
ryedaft@sh.itjust.works 1 month ago
Glad no one decided to make tortoise chowder out of him in those 192 years.
azi@mander.xyz 2 months ago
Suck_on_my_Presence@lemmy.world 2 months ago
To save everyone some time
Sphks@jlai.lu 2 months ago
And “The first known public appearance of the term homosexual in print is found in an 1869 German pamphlet.”
…m.wikipedia.org/…/Terminology_of_homosexuality
tuxiqae@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
Which is 36 years after this guy hatched
mindbleach@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
Alan Davies: “And you could fit his accomplishments on the back of a stamp.”
Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
That one must have enraged Stephen Fry 😄