Whats_your_reasoning
@Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world
- Comment on Feeling insecure about going to a 'girlie pop' concert as a 30 year old man, am i overthinking it? 3 days ago:
Upvoted for the Vexillology reference.
But yeah, OP, just enjoy the show. Most of the attendants are going to be way too focused on the show, their friends, and themselves to care that some rando isn’t bopping along with them.
- Comment on Charging to tour rental properties... 4 days ago:
Oh, I’m talking about websites I’ve personally attempted to use, which were whatever non-sketchy-looking options came up on DuckDuckGo. I have no idea what OP’s post is from.
- Comment on Charging to tour rental properties... 4 days ago:
Thank you so much! Craigslist is something I had completely forgotten about. I dropped off Facebook years ago and unfortunately don’t live in Canada, but Craigslist is a great suggestion and I’m perusing it now. You may have just saved me from living in my car (again.)
Seriously, thank you!
- Comment on Charging to tour rental properties... 4 days ago:
Probably. Not much I can do. I’m not paying for a subscription. If anyone has any advice for finding roommates otherwise, I would very much appreciate it!
- Comment on Charging to tour rental properties... 4 days ago:
Rents are too high for a single income to cover anymore, so I’ve been looking for roommates. Even the websites about finding roommates expect you to pay.
To be clear, they have a free tier - but unless you pay, you can’t read the messages you receive. You can read the first line, but the rest is locked. I gave up with one place because the boomer trying to rent a room refused to send me an email. I told him three times to please just email me his message because I couldn’t read it on the site, but because he could read messages fine, he thought it was a setting he had to change. He kept responding with “Okay try now” and didn’t seem to understand that he can’t “settings” other people out from behind a paywall.
All he had to do was copy/paste his message and send it a different way, but he wouldn’t do it. I eventually gave up because the thought of living with someone that’s unable to follow such simple directions sounds more trouble than it’s worth.
Anyway, point is, even if you’re so poor that you need to seek out roommates, you’re still expected to pay a subscription. I don’t even know what to do anymore.
- Comment on Is it safe to assume the guy i went out on a date with, just wants to sleep with me? 5 days ago:
Lemmy is overwhelmingly populated by men, and sometimes it really shows. They’re not wrong in saying you have to communicate, but I don’t think most of the people here fully understand what it’s like being on the other side.
I’m a woman around the same age as the guy in your story. I can see a bit of what it’s like from his point of view, but I also know what it’s like to be a young, anxious, sexually-inexperienced woman trying to navigate men’s intentions. Sometimes every step seems wrong, and overthinking tends to cloud sound judgement. It’s a shame that some people are jumping on you for trying to figure things out here, rather than dumping a purse full of anxiety onto the guy in question. I’ve been there, and I’ve been ghosted after attempting such serious conversations.
Yes, if he runs, you’ll be better off without him. But knowing that doesn’t make it easier to deal with the relevant anxiety. There’s already a lot of good advice on this thread that’s worth combing through and considering. But when it comes down to it, transparency in communication is absolutely the key. If you’re not sure what to say, or don’t feel ready for the conversation, I’d advise writing things down (privately, like on a paper you can throw out afterwards, or in an email without an address.) I don’t know you, but I know that for me, writing things out has a way of providing clarity to my thoughts and feelings. Perhaps doing so could help you find the words you mean to say, so that you’re not left floundering for the best way to explain yourself in the moment.
Feel free to message me if you feel you need someone to bounce thoughts off of. I’ve been around the track a few times and learned a lot that I wish I had known at your age.
Aside from that, I wish you luck, dear sister. Dating can be tricky, but you’re not alone.
- Comment on Dirt Man 6 days ago:
Even if they were on Mars, I bet they’d still try to call us.
- Comment on Magic Rocks 6 days ago:
I’m always noticing things. Interesting things, weird things, funny things. My mom has asked me multiple times, “How do you find so much interesting stuff?”
All I’ve ever be able to respond with is, “I look around.” She misses a lot around her, my brothers and I even mess with her sometimes by “hiding” things in plain sight around my parents’ house and waiting until she says something.
- Comment on Bird 1 week ago:
That sounds so cute. Would you mind paying the Duck Tax?
- Comment on Bird 1 week ago:
One of them decided to sit in the empty rind after they were done and laid an egg in it
Wait, really? The rest of your comment sounds sincere, but this is so absurd that I genuinely can’t tell if this happened or if you’re just being funny.
- Comment on Bird 1 week ago:
Half cut seedless grapes
Note: if you choose to feed grapes to ducks in a public place, please be courteous about any that may fall on the ground or be left uneaten. Grapes are dangerous for dogs and aren’t good for cats either, but some will absolutely eat them if they’re left around.
- Comment on get sum 1 week ago:
Fixed. I must have hit an extra 1 into the converter.
- Comment on get sum 1 week ago:
Lmao. Thank you, fixed.
- Comment on get sum 1 week ago:
That absolutely sucks. Though thinking about it, the vaccine had only just come out when I was already an adult. It’s possible I was “grandfathered in” because the opportunity wasn’t there when I was younger.
Yet there are so many kids with anti-vaxxer parents, it doesn’t seem right to deny the opportunity to young adults who finally have the chance to make their own health decisions. It’s such bullshit how much power insurance companies wield, despite them knowing far less than a patient’s own doctor knows.
- Comment on get sum 1 week ago:
Even the boys I knew in high school already had messed up ideas about sex from porn, and that was 20 years ago.
I never got into visual porn, which made for confusing experiences dating guys who knew little else, in my teens and early 20s. Aside from the obvious confusion that brought to the bedroom about what we were expecting, it was surprising how many guys had perfectly wonderful bodies yet thought they were inadequate. One guy had a 8.5" (47cm) long dick and still thought it wasn’t big enough. I told him, “Dude, you repeatedly stab my cervix. Trust me, you’re big enough.”
It seems that dick insecurity is really common, and that no penis-haver is immune, no matter the size nor what partners tell them.
- Comment on get sum 1 week ago:
it seemed like we were all fucking, even the nerds
Checking in as a nerd who went to high school in the 00’s. Yes, we were still fucking then. Especially the marching band nerds. Don’t get me started on what people got up to on our long bus trips…
- Comment on get sum 1 week ago:
Paid by patient, almost 400 EUR for all 3 doses as far as I could find in my country.
Whoa. As an American who got the Gardasil vaccine for free in my 20s, this feels really weird. Paying for preventive medicine sounds like something I’d expect around here. I was in the notoriously-backwards state of Florida and had already been sexually active for several years, yet the vaccine was still covered for me.
- Comment on Off topic 2 weeks ago:
Oof, as an artist myself, I’d be understanding if somebody wanted to tweak something I made in order to make it more accessible.
But you know what? You do you, man. I can tell you’re a person with conviction, and though I disagree with your opinion, I respect your passion for art integrity.
- Comment on Off topic 2 weeks ago:
And sometimes trans people become aunts. They then dote on the larva like a good ant aunt does.
- Comment on Off topic 2 weeks ago:
They already include multiple audio streams for language selection. In fact, watching a movie in a different language than it was originally produced in doesn’t perfectly “reproduce the experience” either. Jokes get cut, names and acronyms change, and cultural references are either altered or become too foreign for the culture of the new audience to instantly recognize.
Offering a different experience of a movie isn’t unusual. Maybe I can’t understand a Miyazaki film to the extent that he fully intended, because I don’t understand Japanese. But that doesn’t mean there’s no point in watching it.
As well, some people don’t want to experience super loud explosions. They’re content not having that aspect of “the experience” for a variety of reasons. Some people have PTSD. Some people have irritable neighbors. Some people suffer from tinnitis and would appreciate not having the rest of the movie drowned out by a loud ringing inside their own heads.
In many ways, a stream without such dynamic noises provides accessibility to people who wouldn’t be able to enjoy the movie otherwise. You can still enjoy a movie however you want. The rest of us just want an option.
- Comment on Stanford Professor: The idea that Stanford University owes its graduate students a "living wage" is preposterous 2 weeks ago:
Weird. Here I thought having to work a full time job came at the expense of education. I have coworkers who only take once course per semester, because they literally have no time for more.
Then again, our mistake was being born into the working class. We should’ve tried being born into rich families that could provide for us during school instead.
- Comment on Bears: 3/5 2 weeks ago:
I never wondered this before, but I now suspect I may be a bear in a human suit.
- Comment on I just went onto reddit to a intrest subreddit which happens to be NSFW and i got this, fuck reddit im glad i quit it. 2 weeks ago:
but it’s all us binary kids now.
It took me a second to realize what you meant. My first thought was, “Wait, like, binary genders? Cis-gendered people?” Then I remembered binary code exists and I laughed at myself.
- Comment on I just went onto reddit to a intrest subreddit which happens to be NSFW and i got this, fuck reddit im glad i quit it. 2 weeks ago:
Reddit blocks VPN users. I’m unable to access it on my home network because of it.
Which is great! They trained me not to bother going to their site by blocking my attempts. Though I kind of want to punch Snoo now, from having to see his smug face winking at me on the block page every time. Little fucker, you used to be cool. Enjoy the inevitable bot-pocalypse nazi farm you’re building.
- Comment on I just went onto reddit to a intrest subreddit which happens to be NSFW and i got this, fuck reddit im glad i quit it. 2 weeks ago:
Other companies: Thank you for buying from our sponsors! Here’s a code for 15% off!
Reddit: You bought from our sponsors? Lol, you’re banned.
- Comment on I just went onto reddit to a intrest subreddit which happens to be NSFW and i got this, fuck reddit im glad i quit it. 2 weeks ago:
Please make the music ska. A band with that name, playing literal horns, creating a fast, upbeat tempo? It would be perfect.
- Comment on See their point 2 weeks ago:
I absolutely still listen to the same music I listened to at 14. There was a period in my young adulthood where I absolutely hated all popular music. However, that period passed. I’m now in my mid-30s and find even those songs enjoyable. I don’t know if it’s maturity, the improvement in my mental health, having access to anti-depressants, or a mix of the above.
- Comment on Anon does the shopping 2 weeks ago:
100% same. I’m the built-in babysitter for family events. Why would I want to hear my aunt ask for the 500th time why I’m not married, when my nephews and nieces are playing out a story where Bluey and Sonic the Hedgehog team up to fight crime? Screw boring grown-up talk, I want the imaginative adventure.
- Comment on oof 2 weeks ago:
I had a manager who wouldn’t respect anyone who didn’t yell at him. Seriously. He had serious anger issues and would fly off the handle over nothing. He directed a lot of shit at me in particular, probably because I’ve been traumatized by crap like this before and that sociopath probably sensed it. I wasn’t yet aware of a lot of resources I know about today, didn’t have the self-esteem I’ve since found, and I was homeless at the time (thank goodness, I had friends who let me stay temporarily), so I absolutely depended on this job.
One day, a coworker told me that he only stops picking on someone when they yell at him. Sadly, I can’t give you the satisfying response you’re probably expecting: I refused to yell at him. I thought the entire idea was absurd, extremely unprofessional, and had the potential to backfire terribly.
I wish I could say that was the last manager to pick on me, but thankfully the last one was a mental health professional and had the listening skills to take my feedback … albeit only after she made me cry.
Man, I didn’t mean to trauma-dump. But after the shit I’ve been through, I can’t imagine attempting to pass such suffering onto others. I’m extremely grateful for the supportive environment that (usually) surrounds the therapy field. It feels good to be honest with managers and supervisors and know they respect constructive criticism. I can almost feel my heart healing.
- Comment on 2 weeks ago:
I imagine a party theme being dominated by the music choice and decor. I wouldn’t know what to do for decor, but I’m itching for a 90s music list.