I hold a duck once, didn’t know it was that widespread.
Great tee shirt with words of wisdom that I bet you never realized
Submitted 4 months ago by Mickey7@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/cd59fc87-d188-410a-ab03-e992b7b05708.jpeg
Comments
mhague@lemmy.world 4 months ago
If you post censored shit I’m going to PM you shittingdicknipples and lemonparty.
/shakes tiny fist wistfully
LuxSpark@lemmy.cafe 4 months ago
Pftt I’m not afraid of a drink!
apfelwoiSchoppen@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Don’t threaten me with a good time.
KingJalopy@lemm.ee 4 months ago
You’ll touch my dick and you’ll like goddammit
LodeMike@lemmy.today 4 months ago
I wonder what it says under that grey bar. No way to tell.
superkret@feddit.org 4 months ago
growsomethinggood@reddthat.com 4 months ago
Counterpoint: a greater number have touched a vagina (but that framing doesn’t obsess over a woman’s sexual purity, so, clearly less important)
shalafi@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Everyone has touched a vagina. You at least passed one on the way out.
samus12345@lemm.ee 4 months ago
Not people who were born via Caesarean.
peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 4 months ago
Counter counter point: a great number of dicks have touched a vagina
Infynis@midwest.social 4 months ago
Present company excluded
feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Mine has also been up to the wrist in vagina, with moderate colon (limited to the digits). I let people know this before they shake my hand, in the spirit of transparency.
JoMiran@lemmy.ml 4 months ago
Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey
Mickey7@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Never thought about it but obviously everyman has had a dick in his hand for obvious reasons. And all females old enough for sexual interactions have had one in their hand. This is now stuck in my head. The next time I shake the hand of a woman I am going to wonder how many dicks she has had in that hand.
MossyFeathers@pawb.social 4 months ago
Hey, uh, don’t refer to male humans as “men” and then female humans as “females” like that. It’s kinda dehumanizing.
Like, I get calling men, “males” and women “females”, because I’ll do that sometimes (I claim fur-brain as my defense, because calling anthro characters “man” or “woman” is weird); but try not to do the thing where you say “men” then “females” as if we’re a complete different species. That’s… just… not appropriate in a normal context.
Zachariah@lemmy.world 4 months ago
“male” and “female” are more appropriate as adjectives than nouns
5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 months ago
everyman
females
Everywomen/everymales
all [women] old enough for sexual interactions have had one in their hand.
Nah.
TheDoozer@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Gonna has to go piece by piece through this:
obviously everyman has had a dick in his hand for obvious reasons.
This line is trans-exclusive, which would probably be given a pass by all but the most ardent trans-inclusive commenters, but still not great.
And all females
Dude. There are some times when an argument is made that saying “females” is not inherently objectifying, especially in a scientific, military, or other setting where people are categorized that way, with the significant difference being consistency (e.g. man/woman, male/female, etc). Using one then the other strips all that away and makes it seem like referring to women as “females” is just your normal tendency, which strongly suggests the objectifying behavior.
And all females old enough for sexual interactions have had one in their hand.
This is just obviously wrong, as plenty of lesbians, asexual people, or those with lack of access to sexual connections with others have not had a dick in their hands, and that is not an insignificant percentage of women, I’d imagine.
The next time I shake the hand of a woman I am going to wonder how many dicks she has had in that hand.
As if to underline the “females” comment, it’s pretty telling that you feel it worth mentioning that you’re going to wonder how many dicks were in the hands of women, but not men (especially funny since any man you meet has most likely had a dick in his hand more recently than a woman).
Sometimes it is difficult to notice your own biases, so I hope this makes you think about what leads you toward thinking like this, and just general self-reflection.
socsa@piefed.social 4 months ago
And some men sit to pee
growsomethinggood@reddthat.com 4 months ago
Bruh forgot about trans people, lesbians, and asexuals
Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 4 months ago
show me where it says lesbians can’t love cock
apfelwoiSchoppen@lemmy.world 4 months ago
There are so many issues with this comment. Judgy and naïve in the best interpretation.
ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Men/Women Male/Female
Those are the pairings you wanted. But, for fun, try swapping them next time and see what kind of attitude folks get.
Male/Women
Do it. Rustle some jimmies.
shalafi@lemmy.world 4 months ago
LOL. The politically correct police are on your ass tonight!
I cannot believe the seriousness of these replies. What is it the kids say? “Touch grass”?
superkret@feddit.org 4 months ago
Pretty sure it’s “eat ass”.
Mickey7@lemmy.world 4 months ago
It is amazing how so many people cannot simply joke around. Politics so consume their lives every single thing in life is viewed only in that context. And not only cannot they not simply joke around they are on a mission to impose their views on anyone who disagrees with them. What a sad way to go through life. Social media in general is all a joke. And this group specifically is all about just getting a laugh.
not_IO@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 months ago
bro is gonna loose it when he learns about lesbians
Mickey7@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Honestly curious about this. I don’t think that people turn into homosexuals. They either are or aren’t at birth. But in the case of lesbians, which you raised, I wonder how many have at least once experimented with at least one hetero interaction which would involve penis holding
MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 4 months ago
Skin renews every vew days.
bhamlin@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Mine has a dick in it pretty regularly. The point is still valid…
Sternburgexport@feddit.org 4 months ago
The fact you said “a dick” and not “my dick” 🤨
jol@discuss.tchncs.de 4 months ago
So what? And I also wash my hands regularly. The point still stands. It’s not gross, it’s just a fact.
MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 4 months ago
I just stated a fact too.
Jimmycrackcrack@lemmy.ml 4 months ago
Ah but is it still the same hand?
Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Some have even tested the depths of a twat or two
Mickey7@lemmy.world 4 months ago
It has to vary from person to person but I’ve never seen a sexual guide that discusses how deep in inches the canal is
finitebanjo@lemmy.world 4 months ago
“Almost” is a bit optimistic. Are femcels getting office jobs these days?
frayedpickles@lemmy.cafe 4 months ago
Some people are straight and left handed. Typically shake with your right.
finitebanjo@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Do they also use the computer mouse with their right hand?
5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 months ago
As all things should be (unless unwanted)
Earflap@reddthat.com 4 months ago
Thank god
DNU@lemmy.world 4 months ago
thats why i dont shake hands anymore.
ColdSideOfYourPillow@lemmy.world 4 months ago
This is why I force everyone to let me shake their hand
Mickey7@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Me too. When in a social situation where it unavoidable I do it but then always wonder how many dicks has this hand handled
Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee 4 months ago
While I was shaking it.
4oreman@lemy.lol 4 months ago
profound.
cm0002@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Couldn’t find a wild uncensored version, so here’s an edited version. #FuckCensorship Image
socsa@piefed.social 4 months ago
Ohhhh i thought it said duck and I was confused
Empricorn@feddit.nl 4 months ago
What a quack.
baatliwala@lemmy.world 4 months ago
twitter.com/…/1712137340142125391
cm0002@lemmy.world 4 months ago
Wow way to suck Google images