I hold a duck once, didn’t know it was that widespread.
Great tee shirt with words of wisdom that I bet you never realized
Submitted 2 days ago by Mickey7@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/cd59fc87-d188-410a-ab03-e992b7b05708.jpeg
Comments
mhague@lemmy.world 2 days ago
If you post censored shit I’m going to PM you shittingdicknipples and lemonparty.
/shakes tiny fist wistfully
LuxSpark@lemmy.cafe 2 days ago
Pftt I’m not afraid of a drink!
apfelwoiSchoppen@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Don’t threaten me with a good time.
KingJalopy@lemm.ee 2 days ago
You’ll touch my dick and you’ll like goddammit
LodeMike@lemmy.today 2 days ago
I wonder what it says under that grey bar. No way to tell.
superkret@feddit.org 2 days ago
MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 1 day ago
Skin renews every vew days.
bhamlin@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Mine has a dick in it pretty regularly. The point is still valid…
Sternburgexport@feddit.org 1 day ago
The fact you said “a dick” and not “my dick” 🤨
jol@discuss.tchncs.de 1 day ago
So what? And I also wash my hands regularly. The point still stands. It’s not gross, it’s just a fact.
MonkderVierte@lemmy.ml 17 hours ago
I just stated a fact too.
Jimmycrackcrack@lemmy.ml 17 hours ago
Ah but is it still the same hand?
feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Mine has also been up to the wrist in vagina, with moderate colon (limited to the digits). I let people know this before they shake my hand, in the spirit of transparency.
growsomethinggood@reddthat.com 2 days ago
Counterpoint: a greater number have touched a vagina (but that framing doesn’t obsess over a woman’s sexual purity, so, clearly less important)
shalafi@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Everyone has touched a vagina. You at least passed one on the way out.
samus12345@lemm.ee 2 days ago
Not people who were born via Caesarean.
peoplebeproblems@midwest.social 2 days ago
Counter counter point: a great number of dicks have touched a vagina
Infynis@midwest.social 2 days ago
Present company excluded
Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Some have even tested the depths of a twat or two
Mickey7@lemmy.world 1 day ago
It has to vary from person to person but I’ve never seen a sexual guide that discusses how deep in inches the canal is
JoMiran@lemmy.ml 2 days ago
Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey
Mickey7@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Never thought about it but obviously everyman has had a dick in his hand for obvious reasons. And all females old enough for sexual interactions have had one in their hand. This is now stuck in my head. The next time I shake the hand of a woman I am going to wonder how many dicks she has had in that hand.
MossyFeathers@pawb.social 2 days ago
Hey, uh, don’t refer to male humans as “men” and then female humans as “females” like that. It’s kinda dehumanizing.
Like, I get calling men, “males” and women “females”, because I’ll do that sometimes (I claim fur-brain as my defense, because calling anthro characters “man” or “woman” is weird); but try not to do the thing where you say “men” then “females” as if we’re a complete different species. That’s… just… not appropriate in a normal context.
Zachariah@lemmy.world 2 days ago
“male” and “female” are more appropriate as adjectives than nouns
5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 days ago
everyman
females
Everywomen/everymales
all [women] old enough for sexual interactions have had one in their hand.
Nah.
TheDoozer@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Gonna has to go piece by piece through this:
obviously everyman has had a dick in his hand for obvious reasons.
This line is trans-exclusive, which would probably be given a pass by all but the most ardent trans-inclusive commenters, but still not great.
And all females
Dude. There are some times when an argument is made that saying “females” is not inherently objectifying, especially in a scientific, military, or other setting where people are categorized that way, with the significant difference being consistency (e.g. man/woman, male/female, etc). Using one then the other strips all that away and makes it seem like referring to women as “females” is just your normal tendency, which strongly suggests the objectifying behavior.
And all females old enough for sexual interactions have had one in their hand.
This is just obviously wrong, as plenty of lesbians, asexual people, or those with lack of access to sexual connections with others have not had a dick in their hands, and that is not an insignificant percentage of women, I’d imagine.
The next time I shake the hand of a woman I am going to wonder how many dicks she has had in that hand.
As if to underline the “females” comment, it’s pretty telling that you feel it worth mentioning that you’re going to wonder how many dicks were in the hands of women, but not men (especially funny since any man you meet has most likely had a dick in his hand more recently than a woman).
Sometimes it is difficult to notice your own biases, so I hope this makes you think about what leads you toward thinking like this, and just general self-reflection.
socsa@piefed.social 2 days ago
And some men sit to pee
growsomethinggood@reddthat.com 2 days ago
Bruh forgot about trans people, lesbians, and asexuals
Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 2 days ago
show me where it says lesbians can’t love cock
apfelwoiSchoppen@lemmy.world 2 days ago
There are so many issues with this comment. Judgy and naïve in the best interpretation.
ChicoSuave@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Men/Women Male/Female
Those are the pairings you wanted. But, for fun, try swapping them next time and see what kind of attitude folks get.
Male/Women
Do it. Rustle some jimmies.
not_IO@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 day ago
bro is gonna loose it when he learns about lesbians
Mickey7@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Honestly curious about this. I don’t think that people turn into homosexuals. They either are or aren’t at birth. But in the case of lesbians, which you raised, I wonder how many have at least once experimented with at least one hetero interaction which would involve penis holding
shalafi@lemmy.world 2 days ago
LOL. The politically correct police are on your ass tonight!
I cannot believe the seriousness of these replies. What is it the kids say? “Touch grass”?
superkret@feddit.org 2 days ago
Pretty sure it’s “eat ass”.
Mickey7@lemmy.world 2 days ago
It is amazing how so many people cannot simply joke around. Politics so consume their lives every single thing in life is viewed only in that context. And not only cannot they not simply joke around they are on a mission to impose their views on anyone who disagrees with them. What a sad way to go through life. Social media in general is all a joke. And this group specifically is all about just getting a laugh.
finitebanjo@lemmy.world 2 days ago
“Almost” is a bit optimistic. Are femcels getting office jobs these days?
frayedpickles@lemmy.cafe 1 day ago
Some people are straight and left handed. Typically shake with your right.
finitebanjo@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Do they also use the computer mouse with their right hand?
DNU@lemmy.world 1 day ago
thats why i dont shake hands anymore.
Mickey7@lemmy.world 1 day ago
Me too. When in a social situation where it unavoidable I do it but then always wonder how many dicks has this hand handled
5714@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 days ago
As all things should be (unless unwanted)
Earflap@reddthat.com 1 day ago
Thank god
Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee 2 days ago
While I was shaking it.
4oreman@lemy.lol 2 days ago
profound.
cm0002@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Couldn’t find a wild uncensored version, so here’s an edited version. #FuckCensorship Image
socsa@piefed.social 2 days ago
Ohhhh i thought it said duck and I was confused
Empricorn@feddit.nl 2 days ago
What a quack.
baatliwala@lemmy.world 2 days ago
twitter.com/…/1712137340142125391
cm0002@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Wow way to suck Google images