his coworkers are the socially inept ones that’s a top tier dad joke.
Anon is at a work function
Submitted 3 days ago by Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works to greentext@sh.itjust.works
https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/726eedd4-2f4e-4125-ad68-e9fff4c5ea31.jpeg
Comments
rickyrigatoni@lemm.ee 2 days ago
ameancow@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Seriously, that was fire, either his coworker was a much worse social reject, or greentext had already fucked his reputation at work. Since it’s 4chan, I can easily assume he tried to hit on every female coworker in some really creepy way and now nobody wants to be near him. I had a coworker like that. Everyone hated him.
SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 2 days ago
now I get flashbacks to the time we did a company retreat at some holiday beach.
10 or so of our company go on a sailingboat party tour with another group: a very obvious bachlorettes party. a dozen or so woman, with one of them wearing a white bikini and head gown.
creepy-social-inept-dude from our company decided to try his luck. With the future bride of all people.
It was quite amusing and sad to watch
Mac@mander.xyz 2 days ago
Wow anon thank you for the illustration
I wasn’t sure what you meant by “plain white t shirt”Empricorn@feddit.nl 2 days ago
Can you circle it for me? Still having trouble…
SkaveRat@discuss.tchncs.de 2 days ago
lime@feddit.nu 2 days ago
i would definitely have laughed at that.
SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 2 days ago
Everyone is now blankly staring at you.
prole@lemmy.blahaj.zone 1 day ago
Yeah, that would have been my cue to leave and never hang out with those people outside of work ever again.
steeznson@lemmy.world 2 days ago
I once walked towards a dude wearing the same shirt as me in a nightclub on my way to the toilet. I said, “Nice shirt bro!” and then walked directly into a floor to ceiling mirror.
Dalkor@lemmy.world 1 day ago
I’ve bumped into a mirror at a nightclub and apologized to myself. And then facepalmed harder than I ever have before.
gaja@lemm.ee 2 days ago
I’m at my first office job. A lot of people seem to eminate of the same forced positivity I saw during college. I don’t want to isolate myself, but I can’t see myself making connections.
henfredemars@infosec.pub 2 days ago
Remember that sociable people are over-represented in your data set. The hermits and otherwise isolated types are the ones you are least likely to see around the office even when they are present.
Gradually_Adjusting@lemmy.world 2 days ago
Start signing your emails with “Kindest regards,”
Everyone knows that such people are not to be trifled with. It’s the office job equivalent of killing an inmate in the prison yard on your first day.
TwoBeeSan@lemmy.world 2 days ago
“Thank you for all you do.” Is my go to.
I regularly beef with the kindest regards lady. She’s a lazy ass lol
easily3667@lemmus.org 2 days ago
Please advise
Kindest regards, Anon
May as well have pushed the CEO off the roof
Kit@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 days ago
Just keep telling people that you’re swamped. “Aw man I wish I could go but I’m swamped. Thanks for inviting me though!” I’ve been in my corpo job for two years and have yet to attend any social events, except when catered and then I just sneak in and grab a plate then bail.
tetris11@lemmy.ml 2 days ago
Anon used the word ‘bro’ when they should have used the word ‘friend’ and cupped the balls of their white shirt brother. Also, that’s a t-shirt not a shirt, no wonder anon disappoints everyone
Empricorn@feddit.nl 2 days ago
It’s very offensive when people try to talk to me without cupping my balls first. Politeness is dead!
ace_of_based@sh.itjust.works 2 days ago
You never needed a friend in me before. But now you come to me and you say “Empricorn, nice t-shirt.” But you don’t show me respect. You don’t offer friendship. You didn’t even think to cup my balls."
MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de 2 days ago
T-shirts are a sub-set of Shirts in general.
SoftestSapphic@lemmy.world 2 days ago
If I had to go out drinking with my coworkers like they do in Japan then I would end myself
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 2 days ago
Same. I don’t drink, so it’ll suck even more than usual.
smee@poeng.link 2 days ago
Welcome to hell.
The problem with the Norwegian julebord tradition is that it is not only used for eating nice Christmas food, but it’s also just as common to use it as an excuse to get very drunk.
Coworkers getting very drunk together also tends to be a bad idea in general, and the julebord tradition is known to have many controversies. Not only is it the most likely place for someone to hook up with a coworker, but it’s also known to be a breeding ground for workplace conflicts and sexual harassment.
henfredemars@infosec.pub 2 days ago
How else were they to stare at your blank shirts?
Pencilnoob@lemmy.world 3 days ago
[deleted]adarza@lemmy.ca 2 days ago
found the middling-manager in HR that set the whole thing up to begin with.
jmcs@discuss.tchncs.de 2 days ago
*below mediocre manager.
Even the average HR person can see a large scale roasting in a work environment would be a disaster.
Empricorn@feddit.nl 2 days ago
“He he, that’s a good one, Denise! Got me good! I have to go to the bathroom now, but definitely not to sob in the stall…”
baines@lemmy.cafe 3 days ago
don’t go to unpaid work functions
PDFuego@lemmy.world 2 days ago
I got chewed out for not going to a company bowling party once because I was working that night and asked for overtime if I went. I was doing security patrols which in that job meant 12-hour overnight shifts that were mostly driving, and I refused to lose 3 hours of sleep so I could go out before work. The HR lady or whatever she was couldn’t understand why I refused to go even though she so thoughtfully planned it outside of work hours.
tetris11@lemmy.ml 2 days ago
that is shitty and should be pointed out to her if she genuinely didn’t know
baines@lemmy.cafe 2 days ago
fuck companies like this
ace_of_based@sh.itjust.works 2 days ago
“If I’m not being paid, I’m not coming” is something i make clear with my bosses early on. It doesn’t ingratiate me to mgmt, but i already tried the “team player” route and it’s an investment with no fucking returns. I’m to old to fuck around, I’m only there to get paid, miss me with that off-hours shit. i have enough friends and bossman aint never gonna be one of em.
Cruxifux@feddit.nl 2 days ago
It’s a good way to connect with your coworkers and organize or at least talk about pay together.
jabathekek@sopuli.xyz 2 days ago
Unless your co-workers are absolutely miserable like Anons.
JokeDeity@lemm.ee 2 days ago
The only place I worked that had frequent unpaid functions was JP Morgan Chase. Those people are not organizing against the man, and if pay is brought up, it’s to rub it in someone’s face.
Don’t go to unpaid work functions.
Kit@lemmy.blahaj.zone 2 days ago
Unless there is free food. Never pass up free food.
baines@lemmy.cafe 2 days ago
there is a food to effort ratio
(quality + cost + favor) / (pain + suffering + people)
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 2 days ago
Check.
Prime_Minister_Keyes@lemm.ee 1 day ago
I only go when there’s free beer. Like, real, actual beer. None of that 0% BS.