_Eyes his french press suspiciously _
謝謝（不,我沒有精神分裂症）
Submitted 2 months ago by MTZ@lemmy.world to [deleted]
https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/2d40ae4d-80e5-400a-a24a-810035efccb7.jpeg
Comments
turtlesareneat@piefed.ca 2 months ago
FenrirIII@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Bon jour!
backalleycoyote@lemmy.today 2 months ago
Mine said “On ne passe pas!”, so I knew it was one of the good ones.
CaptainBasculin@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
All jokes aside, IoT devices suck.
Why does a dishwasher need to connect to a remote server to use its full functionality? Why does my coffee maker need me to start it using an app? At that point it isn’t a feature, it’s a dependency that the company behind will eventually shut down one way or another.
Slovene85@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
Fedizen@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Pat_Riot@lemmy.today 2 months ago
Shoots coffee maker Americanly. Shoots toaster too, just to be sure.
LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
Do toasters die? I’ve been using the oven whenever I needed toast do to counter space but like the design of a toaster makes me feel like if you shot a hole through a toaster you might just get a toaster that heats most of the bread, and you just have a circle where it doesnt toast. I guess it depends where you shoot it maybe.
Kowowow@lemmy.ca 2 months ago
I had one fail because my brother didn’t know about the release button to it became a fire hazard
Pat_Riot@lemmy.today 2 months ago
I think if you broke the element it wouldn’t work anymore. I honestly just added the toaster because I thought it was funny. I don’t even have one anymore. I have a Ninja Flip multi function toaster oven. Lol.
I refuse to have any “smart” appliances at all
hidalgo_islenio@lemmy.world 2 months ago
rizzothesmall@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
If you bought a coffee pot requiring network access and give it unrestricted internet then you deserved to become a government pawn
Phunter@lemmy.zip 2 months ago
Gonna tell my mom I got a government job.
smuuthbrane@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
If the have “reams” of data on me, good luck reading through it all.
[This is a sarcastically humourous take on the fact that the word “reams” is used, which is a measure of blocks of 500 pieces of paper.]
slowmorella@discuss.tchncs.de 2 months ago
yeah i was also surprised they printed it.
JennaR8r@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
I think they meant what they said. They could view it all on a computer screen but if they were to print it out it would probably be 500 reams worth of data on each person.
mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca 2 months ago
why would I care? the US is spying on me and they’re a much bigger threat to me
finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Wait until you find out what they’re doing to you through your toilet seat!
MTZ@lemmy.world 2 months ago
I don’t actually mind that. I kinda like that. (secretly)
JennaR8r@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
Maybe it’s finally time we start kink-shaming some people.
EpicMuch@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
I was gifted a thermal insulated coffee mug with built-in battery to keep hot. Connects to phone via Bluetooth. Got warnings that the mug would be able to track all 50+ Bluetooth MAC IDs that are in range (I’m in an apt building). That mug will never get turned on or used
Grostleton@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
Imagine being afraid of a Bluetooth device behaving like every other Bluetooth device ever created.
otacon239@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Except that this hooked into an app and sent all the info about those Bluetooth devices to the manufacturer, which some data collectors can use process of elimination to isolate you. Normal (privacy-respecting) Bluetooth devices do not pass this info to the service provider and only your phone uses it to pair with the device.
lena@gregtech.eu 2 months ago
As @Grostleton@lemmy.dbzer0.com said, that’s how every Bluetooth device works, but I’m also curious what purpose connecting a mug to a phone via Bluetooth serves.
Grostleton@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
It’s to monitor battery life and adjust temperature, you can usually do both via physical interaction with the warmer, but they offer an app that may display more info or allow more precise control over the temp. Usually the app is completely optional.
LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
No idea, maybe that’s where you see the battery level? I like to imagine the coffee mugs are just chatting amongst themselves.
“Ugh Peggy with her fucking black coffee again, we make it through 15 minutes of work and we’ll be back in here so we can refill … Same shit every morning”.
“You’re telling me, Clyde’s been milking his coffee break for 45 minutes now, I doubt he even remembers telling Terry we were going to send him that paperwork”
blimthepixie@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 months ago
Are you sure they weren’t MUG IDs?
Gaja0@lemmy.zip 2 months ago
I like to imagine the guy who pitched spying on Americans through their coffee makers like “we need to figure out how much coffee Americans are drinking” and everyone in the room was just fully on board with this genius idea.
unmagical@lemmy.ml 2 months ago
The US also has reams of data on every American. The difference is America is using to control, capture, and kill people.
caboose2006@lemmy.world 2 months ago
I’ve got a french press. Is it spying on me for china or France. At this point I don’t care which one.
kboos1@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Thought that it would be obvious that your $25 smart coffee maker was spying on you.
mghackerlady@leminal.space 2 months ago
I don’t give a rats ass if chinas tracking me. Why? because I don’t live in china nor do I ever plan to. In fact, I’d prefer they track me instead of a US company
ALoafOfBread@lemmy.ml 2 months ago
Oooh new vocab, thanks comrade.
精神分裂症 Jīngshéng fēnliè zhèng Schizophrenia
精神 - mind/mental state 分裂 - split/divided 症 - illness
謝謝（不,我沒有精神分裂症） Xièxiè (bù, wŏ mĕi yòu jīngshéng fēnliè zhèng) Thanks (no, I don’t have schizophrenia)
lightnsfw@reddthat.com 2 months ago
What’s the worst that can happen? China takes over and I’m forced to slave my life away and not be able to get anything I want?.. oh wait…
Dearth@lemmy.world 2 months ago
what exactly is the concern with China knowing when I make my coffee or use my laundry machine? It’s not like they’re interested in stealing my identity or scamming me out of my savings. Outside of the generally icky-ness of having your data stolen, what’s the endgame?
marxismtomorrow@lemmy.today 2 months ago
Silly Answer: American morning rituals are sacred. They are to be hidden from our enemies.
Actual Answer:
Small Data sources compiled over time with rough geographic approximation (or direct geographic information such as GPS sensors on phones) as well as likely consumer information can actually form a complete or near complete profile on the habits and locations of individuals, groups, and companies, including military targets. As an example, if we assume all Chinese companies are secretly government controlled (they’re not.) extensions of their spy agency then, for example, a useful profile might include:
Time the alarm clock went off + time water heater gets activated + time coffee maker is set to make coffee + time refrigerator is opened and closed + time recorded by alarm system + video from doorbell cam = Accurate morning routine, including when the house will be empty, when it will be occupied but not actively monitored (during a morning shower), if and when the person might be gone for a run and how long
If you need to target say, a general who you believe has classified information in his home office, then it would be amazing to know all of this. It’d also be easier to just bribe the maid to get what you want (which is how 99% of ‘spying’ operations actually work.)
If you extend that to all things that might form some amount of data on their use, you could get a total profile of everything someone does in a day in their home… or office… or possibly military base.
Now is this is a risk? Yes.
Is this a likely risk? No. Not even a little. Again bribing a maid or maintenance technician is cheaper, easier, and way, way less risky.
Then why do so many
Chineseappliances send this information to unknown and scary ip addresses?Because data is valuable to advertisers, and theoretically it’s valuable to engineers to know how their product is being used. This combined with executives’ push for everything to have an app, because data is valuable and because it makes the product seem ‘modern,’ fully offers a simple explanation on how and why we find ourselves here. But sinophobia in the Amerisraeli Empire is the only way the Epstein class actually maintains any control – if there is an enemy who they accuse of doing even worse, the subjects of the empire let them do anything they way.
DisgruntledGorillaGang@reddthat.com 2 months ago
How do they have reams of data on every American?
GreenShimada@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Is that why this stainless steel French press needs wifi to work?
yermaw@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
They flipped my mom!?
StillAlive@piefed.world 2 months ago
手た経消す屋根多雨
DickFiasco@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
I doubt it.
Image
Atelopus-zeteki@fedia.io 2 months ago
My moka pot ain't talkin' to no one.
considine@lemmy.ml 2 months ago
It only sings a sweet burbling song of coffee to me each morning. And afternoon.
Serinus@lemmy.world 2 months ago
I’d recommend one that’s not plastic. (Though I have that same one and use it occasionally.)
www.hario-usa.com/…/switch-immersion-dripper
pennomi@lemmy.world 2 months ago
Seriously. I’m not really sure why a coffee maker needs to have any technology. My electric kettle is about the highest tech thing in the whole process.
wander1236@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
The steam from the water powers a micro rotor and the coffee acts as an antenna, duh
100_kg_90_de_belin@feddit.it 2 months ago
Water boils. Evaporates to steam. Turbine goes brrrrr.
UnimportantHuman@lemmy.ml 2 months ago
Dude when I tell people I only do pour over coffee people are always like “you know you can get a coffee maker for 20 bucks”
I just prefer how little space these things take up. Plus I rarely drink more than 2-3 cups a day.
DickFiasco@sh.itjust.works 2 months ago
Oooo, a family member give me their old drip coffeemaker because I took too long with my French press one time while they were visiting. They honestly thought they were being helpful. It’s been sitting in the closet since the day they left it here.
Fedizen@lemmy.world 2 months ago
I have a stainless steel one but yeah pour-over gang reporting