“Hmm yes let me talk about a very illegal schedule I on an app that has access to my exact device location 24/7”
Most intelligent greentexter
Anon has an idea to get laid
Submitted 3 weeks ago by Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works to greentext@sh.itjust.works
https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/26717373-7c57-4af8-85cd-f3371b044a7f.jpeg
Comments
empireOfLove2@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 weeks ago
webghost0101@sopuli.xyz 3 weeks ago
To be fair. Joking about committing a crime is not illegal.
dohpaz42@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Pretty sure it doesn’t have to be illegal for the cops to turn your life inside out.
hanrahan@slrpnk.net 3 weeks ago
And the signs at aiports saying joking about bombs is illegal ? I can ignore them and crack on with my comedy bomb routine ?
rooroo@feddit.org 3 weeks ago
Very much depending on where you are. Pretending to commit or to have committed a felony (idk the minutiae of translations; Straftat in German) is one in itself over here. Fake it and instantly make it, yay!
x00z@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
This is why I first spoof my location to your house.
Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Might as well spoof it to the police station.
captainlezbian@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Desoxyn is schedule II though. Still shouldn’t talk about manufacturing schedule II drugs illegally.
OsrsNeedsF2P@lemmy.ml 3 weeks ago
I really thought anon had a plan here
psmgx@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
I mean having a lot of rock will get you laid, but not with tinder hotties
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
If your standards are low enough, even a bump could get you laid. You’ll definitely get a variety of STDs though.
hendrik@palaver.p3x.de 3 weeks ago
Yeah, everyone wants some drugs. The girls, the police, ...
Scubus@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
“The pd reportedly found 39 lbs of drugs at the premises, which took several trips to transport as the 35 lbs were found to be very volitile. So volitile, in fact, that by the time it had reached the locker, the 20lbs had decayed into 5lbs through natural breakdown. The department is looking to press charges for the 1lb they found, but it is unlikely that the defendants will see any prison time as a gram is not normally considered a serious crime.”
tetris11@lemmy.ml 3 weeks ago
No one talks about the half-life of drugs
TheKMAP@lemmynsfw.com 3 weeks ago
“idea to get laid”
“can’t follow up, settle for chatting”
don@lemm.ee 3 weeks ago
Anon always thinking behind
UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 1 week ago
All drugs would be legal if we were free.
finitebanjo@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Don’t end it Anon, you just struck it rich my dude. The police tear apart your parents home looking for a nonexistent meth lab run by a nonexistent student and a photo as evidence which is a top search result?
The police union basically just handed your family 10 Million Dollars after a brief lawsuit.
bassomitron@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Man, that might happen for a high profile family/person. For average people in many places in the US, they’ll be lucky if the police even pay out to cover damages to property, nevermind anything else.
_stranger_@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
They’ll be lucky if the police don’t kill them in the raid.
finitebanjo@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
There are tons of examples counter to your claim.
A lot of the settlements probably don’t even get reported on at the request of the city in question.
yetAnotherUser@discuss.tchncs.de 3 weeks ago
And anywhere outside the US, home searches are nearly always legal since they must be signed by a judge. And judges rarely rule against their own.
Over here in Germany, where the inviolability of the home is in the constitution, the suspicion of any crime suffices for getting your home searched. This includes filesharing, spraying graffiti or insulting someone on the internet by calling them a dick. Plus, any resulting damages are only paid if you are found not guilty.
ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
I don’t think cops are liable for damages even in a case like this.
Probable cause is a whole ass bitch.
finitebanjo@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
10M was a stretch for sure, but a family in Jolliet recently got 2.9M USD for the police raiding the wrong house and quite a while back Dr. Lawrence Crosby got 1.25M USD for the police arresting him for the theft of his own car based on an anonymous tip, which is about as much “probable cause” as this case.
RegalPotoo@lemmy.world 3 weeks ago
Plenty of places would happily pay a couple of million not to find out
sanpedropeddler@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
A brief lawsuit that will only exist if you are wealthy or can find contingency representation.
sugar_in_your_tea@sh.itjust.works 3 weeks ago
Maybe, but it may take a couple years to see any of that money…