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makes sense

⁨553⁩ ⁨likes⁩

Submitted ⁨⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨nave@lemmy.zip⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://lemmy.zip/pictrs/image/c9d9917b-b29b-4787-b44b-a088af7f29a2.webp

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  • FoundTheVegan@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Fake for any of those wondering.

    But keeping employees based on how many lines of code they have written, which he did, is essentially the same logic.

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    • Ilovethebomb@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Ernest Hemingway was paid by the word, which shows in his work. I imagine this pay structure would have a similar effect on how people code.

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      • Lamps@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Please correct me if I’m wrong, but I thought that saying was for Dickens? Wasn’t Hemingway famously terse?

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      • FlyingSquid@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        I’m not a coder, but wanting code that isn’t streamlined seems like a bad plan to me.

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    • AA5B@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I would do so poorly there, in many ways …. I love those days when my lines of code is negative

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      • TheBlue22@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        There are 2 things in coding that are incredibly satisfying for me:

        1. Compiling after implementing a fuckton of features

        2. Deleting a massive amount of code after refactoring for a while

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    • whereBeWaldo@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      My ass would just write functions that take a huge amount of parameters and assign one in each line

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    • HawlSera@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Oh the amount of redundant code I would write

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  • Alchemy@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Employee that was mining crypto on the side is hella stoked at this news.

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    • Really_long_toes@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Meanwhile his mate sitting across from him was gpu mining

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    • jecht360@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Probably mining dogecoin or something else Musk would like.

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  • CADmonkey@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    So, the bonus goes to the guy who was playing Factorio when he should have been working?

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    • Land_Strider@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Isn’t Factorio very optimized, not in the sense that it uses all system resources completely, but in the sense that it has very efficient code enabling millions of operations and increasing without needing much more system resources to scale it?

      I would definitely go with Arma in this case. Although it has very heavy calculations for a lot of things to start with, it can’t scale well and cause CPU bottleneck very soon.

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      • dfc09@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Factorio definitely taxes CPU usage heavily if you’re building a mega base. Don’t get me wrong, it’s gotta be a big ass base, but you could just import somebody’s monstrosity and run it in the background.

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      • kuberoot@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        It is pretty well optimized. I think it might not be, like, genius-level amazing, but the devs care about performance and worked to improve it.

        In the end though, it’s a game where the entire map (as generated so far) is simulated - I think there’s cases where chunks go to sleep, but it’s not Minecraft’s “stop simulating anything not next to a player”. When combined with players building lots of machines moving many, many items around, you’ll inevitably end up with some serious CPU usage. Not a problem on a decent computer, but I have had friends struggle on weak laptops, even getting dropped as they literally couldn’t keep up with the server.

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      • SaltyIceteaMaker@iusearchlinux.fyi ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        So i played through factorio once and i gotta say cpu isn’t that big of a problem. Ram is tho. Had 20% cpu utilisation in my end base but like 80% ram usage. I had 16 gb at that time, i specifically bought 64 gb just to make sure i can play factorio without problems😂

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      • Riven@lemmy.dbzer0.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Modded minecraft bb

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    • ryathal@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      If you want to crush a cpu it’s Dwarf Fortress time.

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  • horndogAI@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I’m glad to hear this is fake but it seemed 100% believable to me

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    • homesnatch@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      The part where it said “Christmas Bonus” should have been the tip off…

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      • extant@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        That’s because you assume it means financial reward but the real reward is the privilege to serve the company, what a bonus!

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      • FlyingSquid@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Or just “bonus.”

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    • MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      That’s the joke.

      Elon is so random and unpredictable that you can make up just about anything about him and nobody will really know if it’s satire or not…

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  • ndsvw@feddit.de ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    [deleted]
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    • TopRamenBinLaden@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I haven’t even had to turn my heater on during work hours this year thanks to Android Studio.

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      • kattenluik@feddit.nl ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        The install process for Android Studio should also prompt you to download more ram, it’s unacceptable that they don’t.

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    • zzx@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Lmao true. Having to open that piece of shit always causes me so much pain

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    • Scubus@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I wonder how my CPU is benchmarking since 3 minutes ago?

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  • Conyak@lemmy.tf ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I assume this is fake since no one at X is getting a Christmas bonus.

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    • lseif@sopuli.xyz ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      it was edited from “salary” to “christmas bonus”

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    • prime_number_314159@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      “You wasted trillions of cycles, then ask me for Money?!?” - Elon, probably

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  • amzd@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I love receiving a bonus for mining Bitcoin on company hardware

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  • ExLisper@linux.community ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    cat /dev/urandom | grep “dickhead”

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    • GroupNebula563@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      %0|%0

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  • Tischkante@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    1. Write batch file listing the contents of c: recursively and changing to c:\windows doing it again, then loop.

    2. ???

    3. Employee of the century, free brothel on mars.

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    • Krafting@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Just exec a fork bomb

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    • MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Run prime95 in the background of all of your work. Even when you go home, leave it running… 24/7 100% CPU usage.

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  • norgur@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    So those who misuse company assets to enrich themselves b mining crypto get rewarded by larger bonuses? Sounds like the way the world works for those super rich fellas like Elon “Edgelord” Musk.

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  • CharlesDarwin@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I so hope this is fake, because this is so stupid, even by Space Karen standards.

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    • dual_sport_dork@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Wasn’t he firing people based on number of, or lack of, code commits at one point? Even if this isn’t real, it’s still very on-brand.

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      • MentallyExhausted@reddthat.com ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        That’s what this is satirizing, yeah

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      • InfiniWheel@lemmy.one ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        He was also doing that examination by having people print out the code for him to read apparently

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  • 0x4E4F@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Monero, here we come!

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  • someguy3@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Is this real?

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    • LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.one ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I can’t even tell anymore

      His entire life is a shitpost incarnate, and not a very good one

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    • skankhunt42@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      I have no idea but I had the same question. I also love the fact that We’d believe that he’d do something like this.

      Please tell me it’s real.

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  • AlexJD@feddit.uk ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Oh god he’d actually do this and employees would have to try to get the weakest CPU possible so percentage utilisation would be higher.

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    • Vilian@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      just run a stress cpu program 24/7

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      • jonne@infosec.pub ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Suddenly everyone at Twitter starts mining crypto.

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      • EatYouWell@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Do folding at home

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      • AlexJD@feddit.uk ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

        Just get a pentium 4 and open outlook 2016

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  • therealjcdenton@lemmy.zip ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Sweet all that time playing TF2 will finally pay off!

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  • TheBlue22@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Time to play modded minecraft during company time

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  • NaoPb@eviltoast.org ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Allright, everyone install Prime95 for best bonus.

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  • thoughtorgan@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    I’d have the biggest bonus at my company.

    Old school RuneScape 😎

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  • meathorse@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Prime95 for maximum bonus!

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  • HawlSera@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    So the Janitor gets nothing and the guy slacking off playing Deathloop gets a fortune.

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  • minamoog@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    gentoo users stay winning

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  • catlover@sh.itjust.works ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    while true; do npm ci; done

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  • nobleshift@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago
    [deleted]
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    • SHOW_ME_YOUR_ASSHOLE@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Or mine some crypto!

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  • Thcdenton@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Time to forkbomb

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    • havokdj@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

      Better yet, mine monero on as many machines as possible for extra profit

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  • Smk@lemmy.ca ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    He should base it off RAM too. I mean, when you work, you must have millions of tabs open.

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  • IWantToFuckSpez@kbin.social ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Just turn on a cryptocurrency cpu miner.

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  • Daft_ish@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    My dad who clicks every pop up he sees is slated to make some serious bank.

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  • kugiyasan@lemmy.one ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    Cool, I will be able to solve those advent of code challenges without optimising my code!

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  • notannpc@lemmy.world ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    If we’re going of usage percentage I would like the finest single core system as my daily work machine.

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  • TimewornTraveler@lemm.ee ⁨1⁩ ⁨year⁩ ago

    let there be elden ring

    and then fat coinpurse

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