Which timezone would win in a conflict?

Submitted ⁨⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago⁩ by ⁨sbeak@sopuli.xyz⁩ to ⁨[deleted]⁩

https://sopuli.xyz/pictrs/image/cc3fd3cd-e311-48e8-9eaa-b58e6a7d897d.webp

Let’s say people can’t agree on the time to go to bed, and each timezone declared war on every other timezone. Who would win in this conflict? What alliances would form, and will there be betrayal? What would the new world order look like with a standard time for everyone?

GMT+8 looks good with the entire population of China on its side. GMT+1 and +2 have large chunks of Europe and Africa and could be quite strong too. The timezones in the east and west coast of the U.S. might also stand a good chance.

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RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Probably the slice encompassing a large number of countries in Africa as well as most of western Europe. Huge number of people and industries contained in that slice.

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niktemadur@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
China’s cheating, it’s all crammed forcefully into one timezone, Beijing’s!
In far western China in winter, it could be noon and the sun is barely rising over the horizon. Then in summer the sunset might be at around 1am.

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- TonyTonyChopper@mander.xyz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  I never noticed that China only has one time zone. Must be terrible for the people on the west end
  
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  - niktemadur@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    Banking and government office hours!
    
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- captainlezbian@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Oh and +1 isn’t. Look at it, they put Spain in Berlin’s time zone to appease an angry loser 90 years ago and just left it there
  
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Mediocre_Bard@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
China.

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foggy@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
China.

Not even a question.

They have 1 time zone.

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ThrowawayPermanente@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Wow is that map ever a trainwreck

But -5 stronk like bull

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- hungryphrog@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Where’s -5? The map’s way too grainy for me to see.
  
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  - ThrowawayPermanente@sh.itjust.works ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    East coast of North America / West coast of South America
    
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rumschlumpel@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Nah, Europe ain’t shit. I bet the US east coast timezone could beat all of GMT+1 alone even without using nukes.

Nukes kind of create a conundrum, though, because they’re pretty much the reason why the big powers stopped direct warfare between each other. If China, Europe and the US had an outright war, those nukes would probably start dropping, and then everybody loses, but also, it’s kind of difficult to truly know how good a country is at nuclear warfare. GMT+1 is certainly going to lose this, though, each of the 4 US timezone could probably nuke it into oblivion, especially since e.g. Germany already has US army bases that are equipped with nuked on its own ground. But how many nukes China actually has and how good the US’s missile interception systems are? Who knows, maybe they’re just that much better. Though even if the US were theoretically stronger, they’re divided into 4 timezones, and it’s not a given that they’ll automatically ally with each other, which again gives China a huge advantage.

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- macros@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Hey, not country war, timezone war! Those bases? They belong to team GMT+1 now!
  
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  - rumschlumpel@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    I suppose that would help, but I’d assume that most nukes are still in the continental US.
    
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yakko@feddit.uk ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Any war with this many aggressors who were all opposed each other absolutely would just look like everyone killing each other at random. Even without nukes, it would be madness on a scale never before seen, resulting in a quieter, nay sleepier world.

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stupidcasey@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Whatever the China Time zone is obviously.

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DeathByBigSad@sh.itjust.works ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Kiribati wins!

They can just go back in time, DUH!

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tetris11@lemmy.ml ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
US and Russia would tear themselves apart internally. That leaves China with the largest functioning army, vs the EU if they can mobilize fast enough

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TranquilTurbulence@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
It would result in the total collapse of the entire time zone system. Every location would switch to local solar time and the war would be over.

When those areas need to communicate with each other, they would develop a new global time system that simply counts seconds from a particular moment in time. Sort of like unix time, but with the epoch set to the moment the new system was launched.

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- Pumafred9@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Develop a new time global system? We Brits can’t even agree on what to call a bread roll!
  
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  - OccamsTeapot@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    It’s breadcake. Problem solved. No further discussion necessary
    
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  - TranquilTurbulence@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    The rest of the world can use the new standard, and ignore the Brits. They can keep their Brexit while the rest of the world can move on. Everybody wins!
    
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captainlezbian@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Europe

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- pyre@lemmy.world ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  they could but wouldn’t. not for moral reasons but because if you end all life companies that own you wouldn’t make any money.
  
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peoplebeproblems@midwest.social ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
UTC obviously.

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wieson@feddit.org ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
+8 or +1 (don’t forget Nigeria)

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BlueEther@no.lastname.nz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
+12 would just ignore you all

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- piwakawakas@lemmy.nz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  MapswithNZ? Wtf?
  
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- Munkisquisher@lemmy.nz ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Yeah we would, stay away
  
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Objection@lemmy.ml ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
GMT-11 wins because nobody remembers to nuke them.

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burntbacon@discuss.tchncs.de ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
I think there’s going to be a multi-way tie as the nukes get launched…

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morphballganon@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
The one with Hawaii could just pretend they’ve already been wiped out and wait for everyone else to destroy each other

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bryndos@fedia.io ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Every TZ has a similar amount of tactical nuclear penguins.
The only way to win is not to play.

=> the moon.

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Little8Lost@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
How it would work later you can see in china because the point they took for their time zone is an end.
People would simply say something like: which retards came to the idea that 4:20 should in the middle of the suntime??

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rmuk@feddit.uk ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Every military in the world uses UTC so I’m gonna say that.

Otherwise, I’d go for UTC-1 because… well, look at it. There’s no way they could lose because there’s nothing there to lose. Nuke away, boyos, it’s all ocean.

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- sbeak@sopuli.xyz ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Don’t underestimate the might of Cape/Capo Verde and the Canary Islands!
  
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menas@lemmy.wtf ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
I think it’s depend of which kind of war. If it’s obvious for everyone that “they is no way we can agree” from the beginning, so it’s a nuclear preemptive strike from the first timezone aware of the rules. So Europe, China, India and Pakistan are close competitors. US have and Canada shall destroy itself, their nuclear capacities are spread across several “timezone interests”. Funny enough, what may make the difference between Europe, China, India and Pakistan may be the hour when the situation declare itself. If the ruling class is asleep, officer may need to wait to wake them up, as it was during the 1983 false nuclear alarm

If it’s not obvious that their is no way to make agreement, we may see an escalation of conflict, starting with soft and hard power. This scenario may be very close of the current relationships, and the winner may be the main imperialists power : Europe or the US In this scenario, it seems obvious that the US adopt one timezone, and make it adopt for every countries in the North and South America. It’s next move would be to sabotage other negotiations. I didn’t exclude Europe from the competitions, because the neo-colonial relationships may help the expand their timezone in their former colonies. What may make the differences is the attitude of UK and Russa. Depending if they adopt the European timezone or not.

I don’t think the number of people involve in one timezone make a change; this is short term scenarios, and economic and diplomatic power seems unrelated with the population size

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- sbeak@sopuli.xyz ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  wait, Canada has nukes?
  
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  - menas@lemmy.wtf ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    I thought their where still hosting US one, but it seems that they ended it in 1984 : en.wikipedia.org/…/Canada_and_weapons_of_mass_des…
    
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bitcrafter@programming.dev ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
They would all lose because they stretch all the way down into Antarctica which means that the penguins would be involved…

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- morphballganon@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Hmm how do time zones work at the south pole? Can you run in a small circle and hit most if not all of them?
  
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  - bitcrafter@programming.dev ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    Apparently not quite! It looks like you would mostly be stepping back and forth between UTC and its opposite.
    
    Given that time zones are essentially set by the local research stations, I conclude that Chile and Argentina would win the war because their time zone has the most coastland and so they would have the most penguins on their side.
    
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rbesfe@lemmy.ca ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Poor Newfoundland

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phonics@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
Australians, because they live in the future. Theyll fuck you up yesterday.

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Ceruleum@lemmy.wtf ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
My time zone of course!

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- sbeak@sopuli.xyz ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  What-or when-is that?
  
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  - Ceruleum@lemmy.wtf ⁨2⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
    It’s now!
    
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kayzeekayzee@lemmy.blahaj.zone ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
My money’s on Greenland

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- Small_Quasar@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
  Sounds like something a tax dodger would say…
  
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Apepollo11@lemmy.world ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
GMT

We’ve done it before and we’ll do it again.

/s obv

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HailHydra@infosec.pub ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
UTC+08:45 obviously has the biggest military presence and would steamroll every other timezone.

/s

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MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip ⁨3⁩ ⁨weeks⁩ ago
You can travel from Ucraine to Japan and only through 4 time zones?

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