Sounds like a normal day in London for those other people.
Anon misfires
Submitted 4 weeks ago by Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net to greentext@sh.itjust.works
https://slrpnk.net/pictrs/image/9911d269-514c-4870-9cd2-4177e16061ae.jpeg
Comments
slazer2au@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
Samsy@lemmy.ml 4 weeks ago
Exactly, I mean it’s the British food, they eat beans for breakfast for example. Explosive diarrhea must be illness number one.
SaharaMaleikuhm@feddit.org 4 weeks ago
Only for the weak with 0 fiber in their diet.
funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works 4 weeks ago
illness number one in London is whatever strain has developed sentience on the tube
amon@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
they eat beans for breakfast
we’re too broke for that
Gork@lemm.ee 4 weeks ago
Not quite a shitpost but almost one. A fartpost.
ajoebyanyothername@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
Let’s be generous and go with a shartpost.
Agent641@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
Do it every day at the exact same time for 1 month.
Call it performance art.
People will be in awe at your revolutionary creative ambition
Embarrassment averted
Comment105@lemm.ee 4 weeks ago
I’d be more embarrassed to end up being a performance artist than the bare bottomed bridge farter tbh.
Quadhammer@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
the bare bottomed bridge farter
Now we have an alias
Blackmist@feddit.uk 4 weeks ago
At least in the 90s you could have got on Eurotrash with your act.
Probably in the segment just after a Belgian naturist with tits like windsocks.
Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 4 weeks ago
Soon a queue will form and you can charge 5 quid at the door
nova_ad_vitum@lemmy.ca 4 weeks ago
I’m sure there’s a curator at the Tate Modern that would entertain this argument.
echodot@feddit.uk 4 weeks ago
At one point they are an arrangement of stacked plastic boxes. So it’s clear they’ll take anything
Quadhammer@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
I think we should commission a statue
Kyrgizion@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
“Titta”
Sergio@slrpnk.net 4 weeks ago
As long as he farted in the general direction of France, he’d be OK.
corsicanguppy@lemmy.ca 4 weeks ago
infront
Well we know he’s not got a suit job.
molten@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
Wrong. He’s clearly an average CEO
Sonotsugipaa@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 weeks ago
No, a CEO would’ve made sure a boat was passing umder the bridge
DudeImMacGyver@sh.itjust.works 4 weeks ago
Never gamble on a fart.
hanrahan@slrpnk.net 4 weeks ago
This is why i need to move back to a big city, i mss this kind of interaction with my fellow humans.
Maybe this is the same guy on holiday ?
dependencyinjection@discuss.tchncs.de 4 weeks ago
Ngl I’ve been walking to work one time and thought I needed to fart and followed through with liquid shit down my legs. Now I was always late cause it was a shit job, so I just rang and told them the truth and that I was going for a shower. When I got to work every fucker was cheering about me shitting myself.
I’ve had two other occasions where I’ve gone from normal to a sweaty, nauseous mess with an incredible urge to poop. One time did it in some grass after getting off the tram for an unscheduled stop and once in a train bathroom where I thought i would be found passed out covered in shit 👀 💩
Nfamwap@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
Have you considered your diet, my good man?
dependencyinjection@discuss.tchncs.de 4 weeks ago
Tell me more?
Diet is pretty poor. I rarely eat a lot.
qyron@sopuli.xyz 4 weeks ago
As usual, real comedy is in the comment section.
akkajdh999@programming.dev 4 weeks ago
really?
Trollception@sh.itjust.works 4 weeks ago
Everyone is going to be talking about it like I can’t believe I saw some guy about to shit off the side of the bridge. Then about 1 hour later everyone will have forgotten and only you remember now.
MutilationWave@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
On Tuesday I felt like I badly needed to shit. I was working at a hospital and the secluded bathroom was out of toilet paper so I went to one in the main part of the hospital. It was just farts. Possibly the most gas I’ve ever had. I have hemorrhoids pretty bad and farting while sitting on a toilet is the worst thing for making them very angry.
Plus mad people were walking by and stopping to have conversations by the door, so many people listened to me fart 40 times.
drosophila@lemmy.blahaj.zone 4 weeks ago
Darkblue@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
Your username weirdly checks out…
And on a side note: there are a lot of ways to cure/alleviate piles. What are your weapons of choice?
MutilationWave@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
I just try to get plenty of water and fiber. I need surgery but I can’t imagine having time for that. Work is frantic.
BenLeMan@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
Ah yes, I believe this is called “Much Ado About Nothing” in Stratford-upon-Avon.
nutsack@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
ive done this but with poop
Track_Shovel@slrpnk.net 4 weeks ago
Projectile shit into the river?
nutsack@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
yea in general
NoForwardslashS@sopuli.xyz 4 weeks ago
Call me old fashioned, but I don’t think pulling your pants down to fart is more embarrassing than doing explosive diarrhea into the Thames.
frankenswine@lemmy.world 4 weeks ago
old fashioned
Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 4 weeks ago
Diarrhea is a lot more understandable reason to do that. A fart you could’ve just sneakily let go while walking
OmegaLemmy@discuss.online 3 weeks ago
Well…
Nah, it’s understandable