Believe it or not, straight to therapy.
Anon's split personality
Submitted 13 hours ago by Early_To_Risa@sh.itjust.works to greentext@sh.itjust.works
https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/a5406fbd-ee7f-4660-95cf-c4e847f52945.png
Comments
kata1yst@sh.itjust.works 6 hours ago
katze@lemmy.cafe 9 hours ago
Gay: anon had sex with a woman and hated it
trashgirlfriend@lemmy.world 8 hours ago
Fake: anon had sex
Walk_blesseD@piefed.blahaj.zone 11 hours ago
Uh, anon, vaginas aren't supposed to be washed. That disrupts the microbiome and can lead to infections.
Honytawk@lemmy.zip 7 hours ago
It isn’t washed with soap, but it is washed with water
YarrMatey@lemmy.dbzer0.com 6 hours ago
Vulvas can be washed with water and unscented, mild soap if tolerated but not vaginas, they are self-cleaning.
WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 4 hours ago
What other parts aren’t meant to be washed? Asking for a friend.
Boomkop3@reddthat.com 7 hours ago
Someone hasn’t had a girlfriend
Walk_blesseD@piefed.blahaj.zone 4 hours ago
Ok buddy, you're allowed to refer to yourself in first person here.
Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 11 hours ago
Yeah just let the jizz stew there naturally
Walk_blesseD@piefed.blahaj.zone 10 hours ago
I love greentext communities on lemmy because it's the exact sort of place where you can effortlessly bait the most bitchless men ever to have existed into confidently stating they don't know how vaginas work 💅💅💅
Gullible@sh.itjust.works 10 hours ago
Toss in some celery, carrots, onions, salt, and a heavy grind of fresh pepper for a spicy UTI.
shalafi@lemmy.world 4 hours ago
Why wife uses a bidet and soap, every single use. She’s never had a UTI or any other issue down there. Explain.
Walk_blesseD@piefed.blahaj.zone 4 hours ago
I can't explain that tbh. Would you like me to have a look???
I'm trying my hardest to picture how one would attempt to wash a vagina with a bidet, and the only conclusion I'm getting here that makes any sense is that you probably don't even know what a vagina is.
Here's a little hint for all you confused straight boys: the vagina is the hole, and the bits on the outside are collectively referred to as the vulva. For most of you reading this, the only practical application of this knowledge you'll ever get is maybe leaving slightly more anatomically correct comments in the replies to a greentext, but who knows?
voracitude@lemmy.world 2 hours ago
Explanation: Luck. Just pure good luck. Biology is messy, results for one aren’t the same for all. It does however increase the chances of an infection, regardless of whether she’s ever had a UTI from this practice.
Imhotep@lemmy.world 9 hours ago
it could have been his point
halvar@lemy.lol 12 hours ago
Fake: anon has girlfriend
Gay: anon can’t stand women
Boomkop3@reddthat.com 7 hours ago
Anon should be dumped, or break up and find someone he likes. Or just find friends with benefits, or an escort?
sunglocto@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 hours ago
Limonene@lemmy.world 11 hours ago
The first half, because of testosterone.
The second half, because of prolactin.
It’s not really that simple, but it’s part of it. And I’m not a doctor.
Boomkop3@reddthat.com 7 hours ago
No, and no. Not even just “not that simple”. You’re dead wrong
ddplf@szmer.info 10 hours ago
This is actually an interesting insight into a severily bipolar mind of a person
daggermoon@lemmy.world 10 hours ago
Is that really what bipolar is like?
BoobaAwooga@lemmynsfw.com 8 hours ago
When people say bipolar they mean borderline. The person in the green text would be borderline
caurvo@aussie.zone 8 hours ago
Not really so far as I understand it. “Bipolar swings” are more commonly on a week-month timescale.
Outwit1294@lemmy.today 12 hours ago
Anon discovers he might be gay
Gullible@sh.itjust.works 10 hours ago
To quote Neil Patrick Harris- “yes, I’m gay. Gay for pussy. “
-Neil Patrick Harris
Quote attributable to one Neil Patrick Harris. His friends call him Neil.
Outwit1294@lemmy.today 10 hours ago
And won’t you know, he turned out to be gay for dick
Kusimulkku@lemm.ee 11 hours ago
Anon is so into vag she must be a lesbian then
Outwit1294@lemmy.today 10 hours ago
All Anons are males. And gay.
LonstedBrowryBased@lemm.ee 7 hours ago
Evolution anon
BreakerSwitch@lemm.ee 4 hours ago
I’ve heard similar takes resolved with “this person is venomously sexist, but straight.” Once their sexual needs are met, the one thing they want out of a partner is done, it’s back to absolutely loathing women.
Sounds like a nightmare, tbh.
Zenith@lemm.ee 1 hour ago
Yeah reading this as a woman is low key terrifying like… if you hate me why tf do you want to fuck me? The idea a person could be so wildly two faced whole also desperately trying to interact with me in my most vulnerable state is so scary, things like this is why women choose the bear